Not an Ordinary Case
by Natalie Ryan
Summary: This is my first fan fic. It's about a case from Deeks' past as a part of the LAPD. The case continues in 2014/15, and the NCIS team struggles as they try to solve the mystery. Story has AU elements. The characters from NCIS Los Angeles belong to Shane Brennan, and my characters belong only to me. Enjoy.
1. Christmas

**Chapter 1 ****-****Christmas**

* * *

**-27.12.2014-**

All of us have different ways of dealing with grief. So does the elite NCIS team that consists of three special agents and one LAPD detective.

Callen is a lone wolf. He tries to hide behind an iron-clad mask, but sometimes it's enough to look into his steel and icy blue eyes to feel his concern or the thoughts of failure to save the day. As we all know, saving one life is equal as saving the whole world, but for Callen that seems it's not enough.

Sam manages grief by hitting the punching bag in the gym. After all he is a SEAL and he can overcome that state fast. But sometimes that leaves scars that cannot be seen on the outside.

Kensi, well she is Kensi. She can be sad, happy, and moody all in one day. She also experienced a lots of loses over the years and she was taught first hand by life itself what grief is and what the feeling of emptiness was.

Deeks had troubled past, yet he managed to stay positive and always have that huge goofy grin on his face.

When it comes to Hetty, she is a true chameleon. Many times the team asked themselves if they knew Hetty as well as she knows them. She has ability to know where everyone of her team members is at specific time of the day, what they eat, drink and what they think. She can fool anyone with the poker face of hers when it comes to her past.

Eric and Nell, well the two techies have ways of their own, but since they are nerdy, and their heads are full with facts about anything in particular, they can overcome the grief by filling the space with more and more facts so they don't face the loss and the failure directly.

And here is Nate, the Operational Psychologist that helps them overcome the problems that their job brings. And the risks they take when they are on the street chasing bad guys.

This day was one of those days that every one of them wanted to forget and put aside in their brain and never remember. This was the day that changed them once more.

* * *

**-****25.12.2014-**

It was Christmas. Sam and Callen were traditionally getting the Christmas tree. They stopped at the shop where they purchased two Christmas trees, one for the OSP and one for Sam's family. Earlier that day Sam said how Michelle and the kids were literally screaming the words "We want a Christmas Tree". Callen joked that he should buy a palm tree, but when Sam glared at him like he was going to put a bullet hole in his head Callen said "It was a suggestion Sam. Don't shoot me." Sam smiled and drove the Challenger to their destination. They took the trees and quickly dropped the first at Sam's house and headed back to OSP.

Hetty waited as they entered the Mission and watched them as they argued about what they should put on the tree. Hetty smiled and coughed so they stopped their conversation.

"Mr. Callen and Mr. Hanna I see you bought the tree."

"Yes Hetty, at the last moment."

"As I've heard you two few minutes ago you were arguing about what should be put on the tree, right?"

Callen thought, _Were we too loud or she has a microphone installed inside one of us?_

"Right." Sam said.

"Well, let me handle that. You two are needed in OSP, ASAP."

Callen and Sam climbed the stairs and stopped at the entrance. In there were Eric, Nell, Kensi and Deeks. They were watching Tom and Jerry. Precisely, they were watching "The night before Christmas". They were talking about their favorite episodes from the cartoon.

Deeks said "My favorite is The Cat Concerto. I mean it warms my heart every time I hear the Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2 from Franz Liszt."

Nell said "My favorite is Pecos Pest. When Uncle Pecos sings cramboneeeee it's just terrific."

Eric said "My favorite is the one with the small mouse, I think his name was Nibbles, when they set free Robin Hood."

"Robin Hoodwinked."

"That's the one Kensi. Who is your favorite?" asked Eric.

"My favorite is Mucho Mouse. When the lady calls Tom to catch El Magnifico, but he ends up playing the guitar together with the orange cat."

She suddenly saw Callen and Sam behind Eric. "Hey guys, where were you two?"

"We were getting the Christmas Tree."

Deeks' grin got bigger. "Cool. God, I love this time of the year."

"You love every time of the year Deeks. So what are you doing?"

Now Eric spoke "We are watching Tom and Jerry." _Isn't that obvious, duh?_

"So what's your fave Callen?" Nell asked.

Callen said "The Cruise Cat, you know when they're on the ship and Tom tries to get the mouse out of it, but he ends in prison."

Deeks grinned even more.

Eric said "Coming up The Cruise Cat".

Sam chuckled at the last words of the tech with blond hair, when Callen asked him.

"What? You don't watch Tom and Jerry?"

"It's nothing G, I was just remembering the last time we were happy like this."

That made all of them stop with the chattering and think about the last time when the team gathered up and played something, or watched some show on TV. The conclusion was: too long.

Eric broke the silence when he hit the play button on You Tube and The Cruise Cat started. As the Tom and Jerry tune filled the room all six of them felt like they were back in childhood. They didn't even notice when Hetty came and sat with them. She thought "That's my family" silently, watching like a mother over her children. They all laughed at the part when Tom was screaming "Get me out of here!" It came like a muffled sound and that's why they loved that scene so much.

"G, my favorite episode is The Cruise Cat, too." said Sam.

…

After they had some fun in OSP, every agent got back to their office and finished the paperwork that waited for them. They were all busy when Hetty came out of nowhere, like she always did (_that silent little ninja_) and spoke:

"Attention everyone!"

They all turned their faces to hers.

"You are officially dismissed from duty from now till New Year's Eve. Is that clear?"

"Yes." They answered in unison.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Go home and get some rest."

Deeks approached Kensi and asked her if she was interested to come to his place and watch some Christmas movies and celebrate Christmas together. She said that she will, but first she wanted to go home and change clothes.

Sam and Callen talked about how Callen should go to their home and spend Christmas with Sam's family. Callen used to reject Sam's offers for him to go at his home and have some fun back in the day, but now he thought it was a good idea. Sam also offered Callen to bring Joelle.

"We'll see about that big guy. Just let me finish something and we're ready to go."

...


	2. Ghosts from the past

**Chapter 2****-****Ghosts from the past**

* * *

While the team enjoyed themselves, on the other end of town a Lieutenant Colonel was chased. It all begun at work. He noticed a man in a black hood following him, so he took off. He sensed that the same guy was tailing him on his way home. When he got home and he opened the door of the car so he could get out, he noticed green Ford Taurus and his driver. The same man with the hood. So he started running across the pavement. The man started running too. He eventually caught the Lieutenant Colonel off guard and put two 9 mill bullets in his torso. The Lieutenant Colonel died on scene. His killer checked whether he left a trail behind or not and left the place.

Like he never existed.

…

* * *

**-27.12.2014-**

Earlier that day Hetty received a phone call from LAPD for a dead Lieutenant Colonel, two days prior. The LAPD requested their help. Usually Hetty left that for Deeks to handle it, _liaise it _(as his colleagues would put it), since he was the liaison officer, but now she took care of that case personally. She assured LAPD that she'll do everything in her power for her team to solve the case and asked the LAPD to send her all the information they had on the dead guy.

Eric and Nell were called for work earlier than expected. Their tired faces were the first thing that Hetty saw when she entered OSP.

"Mr. Beale and Ms. Jones, I'm sorry that we had to call you this early, but we've got a case and I think that our plans for the holidays just got drowned in the ocean."

Both Eric and Nell groaned, but started to pile up the information on the dead guy. In between the other members of the team arrived, to be precise the three agents. The LAPD detective was called to attend his work place later that morning. Hetty wanted to discuss the situation in hand with them first.

Nell spoke first.

"Our dead Lieutenant Colonel's name is Daniel Langley. But, that's not his real name. Lieutenant Colonel Daniel Langley died in 2008. I assume the dead guy took his identity and joined the Marines."

"And what's our interest in the case?"

"Mr. Callen, listen to the end."

Now Eric spoke.

"The dead guys' real identity is David Lucas."

"And that's the interesting part, I assume."

"Yes, Mr. Callen. David Lucas is a ghost from Mr. Deeks' past."

"When he worked with the LAPD?"

"Yes. Under the alias of Max Gentry."

At that moment Hetty saw that Deeks left his go bag on the floor and sat on his desk. She sent Eric to call for him.

…

Deeks came at the Mission earlier than usual. He was called to come to work at 11 a.m., but he came at 10:30 a.m. Few agents from the day shift were working on the paperwork, but no one from his colleagues were at work. It was 27th of December, and they were called for a case. Hetty planned a vacation for all of them, but this case ruined the plan. Just when Deeks sat on his desk, Eric whistled for him.

"Hey, everybody is up here. They are waiting for you."

Deeks looked surprised by the fact that everyone were waiting for him and that he was the last one to arrive.

"Hey guys, what's up?"

Deeks stopped for a moment and watched the images plastered on the big screen.

Hetty said "I assume that you know this character well."

Deeks opened his mouth, but nothing came out of it.

Hetty continued. "That's David Lucas. He was one of Max's friends and informants few years ago as I've put earlier. He joined the Marines in 2008."

"He what?" Deeks almost screamed.

"He joined the Marines. But, not legally. He assumed the identity of certain Lieutenant Colonel Daniel Langley."

"Hetty who is this guy?"

"Mr. Callen I think that should be explained by Mr. Deeks."

Callen, Sam and Kensi looked at Deeks who was still stunned by the image he saw and the memories that flooded through his mind.

He looked at them and ran through the door and down the stairs. By the time he left the Mission he was out of breath.

Kensi wanted to follow him, but Callen stopped her and thought it would be better for him to follow Deeks instead.

When Callen got out of the Mission he found Deeks sitting on the concrete and his face looked like he was hit by a truck. Callen opened his mouth and wanted to say something, but Deeks cut him off.

"He was one of my informants and friends as Hetty said."

Callen gave his hand to Deeks and pulled him up.

"Let's go somewhere else if you want."

"No, I'm good. So, this David guy. He was my informant in a case I worked for LAPD, it was deep undercover as Max Gentry. The case was going on for about 6 months when my Chief said that we should break the ties and for me to get out of there. David was so interested in me, I mean Max that he researched Max. One day he came and gave me these papers and my whole life as Max is on them. He said that he found a friend in me and that he wanted to be my friend. Before that only Ray was my friend, friend, you know what I mean?"

Callen nodded.

"So we got out in some bars, got some chicks during my time spent in the operation, and here it comes the command to shut this down. I had to get out as I got in, so LAPD staged my arrest. David almost cried, but he believed it. And the others believed in the story that the LAPD made up. I wanted to go back to David, to say that I'm sorry I played him, but work was coming and going, and poof, the times goes fast, and here we are 8 years later."

Deeks stopped and looked at Callen.

"After Ray and before you guys, David was my true friend. A friend to whom I didn't need to explain myself. I could be just me. And I think I crossed the line between Max and Deeks. Let some of my characteristics influence Max's character."

"I can relate to that."

Deeks saw the sincerity in Callen's eyes. The man himself has gone in deep cover more than once, so he didn't have to explain himself to his superior. Callen knew the drill.

"I never thought that would be the last time I'll see him alive. If I just knew…"

"Stop beating yourself up Deeks. You couldn't have possibly known what'll go wrong. We don't know if he worked clean work after he got out of jail. Look at the facts. He's assumed the name of a dead Marine…"

"He was clean man, I know. I know when someone is doing out of the ordinary work. Maybe he was an asset of the bad guy in the story, but I highly doubt it that he went back on the other side after what happened in 2006."

"Well, we are here to look at all the angles. I'm not saying this just because he was your friend, but sometimes the people that are closest to us, let's just say it that there's always more to people's personalities, than what they let to be seen on the surface."

Deeks looked at Callen and saw his concern.

"Deeks, I need you on this case. I don't care if you are personally involved in this one, because I've seen you before in these types of situations, and you handled yourself perfectly. But, if it turns ugly, I want to know that you are fully with us. No matter what."

"No matter what, you guys come always first."

"Good to hear that. Now, let's go and brief the team on what you just told me and the rest."

Deeks stopped for a moment.

"You know, I should probably play the Max card. To see if someone from the old job knows something."

"If you want to go back I won't stop you. But, are you sure you want to…"

"Well, I'm not excited about going back to that dark place of my past, but if it's worth the try so we can find something, or maybe someone that is connected to this, then I'll have to do it."

"Okay, let's go."

They went back in OSP. Hetty smiled when she saw the two of her fantastic four assets back.

"I assume that you two discussed the case in hand."

"Yes, Hetty. And I believe that Kensi and Sam should hear the explanation about my connection to David Lucas."

He spent the next half an hour explaining his ties to Lucas and the operation that happened in 2006 in short terms. It was 8 years later, but he remembered it like it was yesterday.

"You know Deeks, I don't like this Max character of yours. It's spooky."

"Well, I don't like it either, but he's what kept me alive all those years and what shielded me from revealing the real me when situations got… you know, a little uncomfortable." He was on the edge, you could feel it in his voice.

"Shaggy, you are officially awarded as our unit's philosopher."

"Why?"

"What you just said sounded like Aristotle."

"No, it did not."

"Yes, it did."

"NO, IT DID NOT!"

"Guys, you've finished?"

"Yes G. Deeks needs to sharpen his senses for humor. I was kidding you _Deeks_." He pronounced the word Deeks.

"Okay, okay don't be mean."

"Deeks, are you becoming Max Gentry as we speak?"

"Nope."

"'Cause I think that you are not the same person that entered the Mission this morning."

"Yeah? You think that? You know what? Maybe I want a break from the entire goofing and laughing thing, don't you think?"

Before Sam could say anything, Deeks ran, _again_.

"What's wrong with him anyway?"

"Maybe he wants to be alone for a moment Mr. Hanna and not to be bothered."

"Yeah, I know that Hetty, but I think that if he goes on this alone I'm afraid he'll lose his good sides. You were witness what happened to him when we came back from the mission with Sidorov. It took him too long to get back. For a moment I thought that he wouldn't. He was so desperate."

"Every person has its own terms of grieving and coping Mr. Hanna. Certainly, Mr. Deeks has its own, I my own, and you yours. But, at the end it's important what we've learned from that experience. Mr. Deeks has its own demons as well and he has a dark side too. His dark side is in the form of Max Gentry and he tries to balance the two personas in one. Right now, I don't know if he can do that, but that's why you, Mr. Callen, and Ms. Blye are here. To help him and support him. He is one of us."

"Yeah, you're right Hetty. But I'm worried. I feel like he is my little brother and now I can't do anything about that. For God's sake, two days ago he talked about Tom and Jerry and Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2 from Frederic Chopin and he was so happy and joyous."

"Let me correct you Mr. Hanna. The Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2 is from Franz Liszt."

"Whatever. What I meant to say is that Deeks is as vulnerable as we are all, but he has gone through too much ugly stuff that I fear this time won't be easy to bring him from the Max Gentry alias."

"He'll be back in no time Mr. Hanna. No worries. He used that alias too many times and he knows when to cut to the chase. Now, go get Mr. Callen and go to the Coroner's Office for the details of the autopsy. Have Ms. Blye go to the Marine Base in Camp Pendleton to find out everything about our dead Marine. I'll handle Mr. Deeks."

"Okay. And Hetty?"

"Yes, Mr. Hanna?"

"Thank you for your words. Your words always make me feel better."

"Glad to hear that. Now, go."

Hetty stood at the door to OPS and inhaled deeply. She exhaled and spoke quietly, so no one can hear her.

"I hope that he'll come back Mr. Hanna. I hope he'll come back. If he's not consumed by the ghosts of his past."


	3. Waves

**Chapter 3 - Waves**

* * *

"It was about time to get back here. Where were you?"

"I was… um… around."

"Deeks, easy man, I'm not going to shoot you. And remember, you're not in elementary school and I'm not your teacher, so you're not being questioned."

"Sam, you're my hero, my mentor. I'm not scared of you."

"Hmmm…"

Sam was happy that finally Deeks was back at his previous state of goofing and laughing and joking.

"Okay. Let's get our roles prepared so when the time comes."

"What roles?"

"G told me that you wanted to go to Ruiz and his boys as you once were, Max Gentry."

"Yes, I do."

"So, we need a plan Deeks. We're not letting you go on your own in the lion's cave."

"But I know these guys. I don't need to…"

"Listen to me Deeks. You knew them in 2006. Now it's 2014. Lots of things are changed since then and it could be dangerous for you to go on your own. Come on, don't be a lone wolf. It's enough to have one lone wolf in the form of my partner."

Callen groaned at Sam's remark. Sam chuckled.

"Besides that, it's all about team work."

"Guys, I'm not a lone wolf. Kensi, please tell them."

"Sam, Callen, he is not a lone wolf."

"Indeed."

"Hetty?"

"Mr. Deeks have you considered your stakes in this dangerous job?"

"We were getting the basics just as you stepped in."

"Mhm. You can do that later. Come with me."

Deeks looked at the three colleagues of his. Sam put his hand on his throat to simulate "You're dead" sign.

"Relax Mr. Deeks, I'm not going to slit your throat. I have something for you."

Deeks thought, _how'd she do that?_

She opened the curtain of the changing room and took a brand new black leather jacket.

"I know that Max Gentry loves leather jackets, so I think that this one will suit him the best."

"Deeks loves them too, Hetty, not just Max."

"I know."

Deeks smiled and thanked Hetty. On his way back to his desk he met the Operational Psychologist Nate Getz.

"Nate. How are you man?"

"I'm fine, thanks. How are you?"

"Well, I'm better."

"I've heard about the case you got today."

"I see that the news fly fast from here to you."

"It's not that we work in the same city or office."

Deeks chuckled.

"I know why you are here Nate. Why don't you tell me the truth for starters?"

Nate looked at Deeks' ocean blue eyes and saw sincerity mixed with sadness and anger. If it was true what people said about the eyes, that they're the mirror to the soul, then in Deeks' case the mirror was closed for public. He tried to maintain his things for himself which was understandable, but sometimes for someone to overcome a bad memory it was necessary to talk to someone.

"You say you know why I'm here. And why I'm here Deeks?"

"Hetty called you. And told you that I may have some problems with Max Gentry."

"Well, you are right. You make me feel like you are the psychologist and not me in this case."

"No, I don't want to do that Doc. Just cut to the point and let me do my job. I'm about to be back on the other side."

"Deeks, I know that it'll be difficult for you, but I need to talk to you about your alter ego, Max Gentry. Only then I will be able to sleep peacefully at night. I will not let you to destroy yourself with this mission. Is that clear?"

"Yes Doc. Loud and clear. Just let me take the jacket to my car and I'll come back to you, I promise.

Deeks raised his right hand to support his statement. While walking to his car, the red Chevy Malibu, Deeks thought of all the times when his alias Max Gentry was needed so the case can be solved. Both in the LAPD and in the NCIS. He never liked that character, but he needed it and that's why he always came back for it. Kensi once said to him that sometimes it's easier to be someone else. Well, now, it was hard to be two persons at a time. Max for the day and Marty for the night.

And here it was Nate's evaluation. Deeks knew better than to avoid Nate's questions and teasing, but right now he felt like he should press the gas pedal on the Malibu and head into the LA traffic. But, he quickly waved that thought. Hell, it was just a conversation.

He inhaled deeply and the air burned his lungs. He felt empty and useless as he clicked the key and locked the car.

"Oh, God why every bad thing has to come to me again?"

…

* * *

**-In Nate's office-**

"Deeks, sit on the couch and relax."

Deeks' muscles were tensed and his body ached, but he listened to Nate's order and tried to relax.

"So, Deeks, Max Gentry. What can you tell me about him?"

"Well, he is the other me. My dark side. He is meaner than me, he is rough and tough. He never regrets his actions. And what's most important of all he won't stand to take orders from someone else. He'll take the job, but it will be on his own terms. He never hesitates and never gives up before the game is over. His ways of acting are little bit non-conventional. He likes to swear and to beat the crap out of someone to gain info."

"Wow. That's one hell of an explanation of your alias, Deeks."

"That's me when I'm not me. When I want a break from the sweet and lovable Deeks. But, generally I don't like him and I tend to use him just when I need to."

"What can you tell me about Max in 2006? When he was part of Marcos Ruiz's world."

"Well Max was always like this. He was son of a bitch. He still is."

"How did you come up with your game?"

"Do you really want to know?"

"Yes."

"Okay. So, one day, I…"

* * *

**-Earlier-**

After Deeks took off the second time Sam and Callen went to the morgue and Kensi went to Camp Pendleton.

Sam started the Challenger and as he drove to the morgue he thought about what Hetty told him about Deeks. He felt a little hesitation in Hetty's tone but then he remembered that she knew exactly what she was doing. It came out of question to suspect the Director of the Office of Special Projects Henrietta Lange.

"Sam? Do you hear me?"

"Um… What G?"

"You passed the morgue 2 minutes ago."

"Right. Sorry, I was thinking about something."

"Yeah, I can see your face looks like a big question mark."

"Really G?"

"I swear to my breakfast from this morning."

Sam looked at him like he had his enemy right beside him. Like he was about to crack his neck.

"Easy Sam. Easy big guy. I just wanted to release the pressure a little bit."

"Well, to me it seems like you heightened it."

They arrived at their destination.

"So, are we going or not?"

"We're going."

They entered the morgue as Dr. Schwartz was finishing her report for David Lucas.

"Hey guys. Nice to see you. We don't get you around here most of the time."

"You're right. But this case is personal and we need the info straight ahead."

"Okay. Here's a copy form the report. Your dead guy got two bullet holes in his torso. The first in his stomach and the second right in the heart. Died on scene. The caliber is 9 mm. The bullets I pulled out of him are sent to our lab for analysis. With a bit of luck, we may get a hit in AFIS. Nothing on his body to indicate a fight prior to his death, so either he knew his killer, or the killer somehow managed to shoot him without fighting with him. His clothes are also given for analysis."

"Thanks, Rose."

"For nothing. Hey guys, is Nate at work today?"

Callen and Sam exchanged looks.

"He is kinda busy right now, but we'll tell him you asked about him and to give you a call."

"Thanks. Have a nice day guys."

"You too Rose."

"So, G, what are you thinking about Lucas? What could possibly go wrong and get him killed?"

"I don't know."

Callen pulled his phone and opened David Lucas' file that Nell sent to him earlier that day.

"He was an average everyday kid. He was born in 1980 in LA. He grew up in a good family, had good grades. In 2005 he joined the group of Marcos Ruiz, a Mexican that ruled with weapons trafficking chain. He came as a replacement to some guy named Gerald Hughes in 2006. Deeks never got to know what the connection between David and Ruiz was.

"However, he was on the scene when the operation went down and he was arrested. He claimed that he didn't know anything about any weapons, but he got two years in prison. In 2008 he got out, and he became a Marine, illegally. Which means only one thing. He was looking for the man that set him up to take the fall and serve 2 years in prison, or he was after the man that was Ruiz's associate."

"But, why now? He was out since 2008. Why in 2014?"

"Maybe he needed time to establish his connections as a Marine and was busy going on missions. And now, was the right time to investigate."

"To investigate what G?"

"Maybe he knew something that he held back from Deeks back in 2006."

"I hate to say it G, but what if this David was involved with the weapons more than he was telling to Deeks? It wouldn't be the first time for someone to fool Deeks around."

"Yup, you are right. But as I promised him, we'll look all of the angles. I don't want to lose Deeks' trust because of a quick conclusion."

"Me neither. So, we do this quietly."

"If we find something suspicious, then we'll tell Deeks. Got it?"

"Got it."

...

Nell and Eric got something on David Lucas' past that didn't come up in the initial search. She texted Callen about it.

"Deeks is not going to like this Eric."

"Either way, we need to tell him."

"First, we wait for Sam and Callen, okay?"

"Okay."

…

Kensi entered in the Caddy and started the engine. In front of her lay a long drive to Camp Pendleton. She was supposed to talk to the supervisor of David Lucas, General Mike Novack. It could be of a great importance if they knew the life of the wannabe Marine that once was Deeks' friend.

She never had a chance to really talk to Deeks about his past and his friends. Whenever she tried to talk about that, they were always interrupted by something; a knock on the door, a case, a phone call, you name it. That should be changed, said Kensi to herself. Deeks deserves more of my attention and now that our thing moved on, lots of changes should be done. It was one of the New Year's Resolutions on Kensi's list. It was strange how the list was getting bigger and bigger.

Kensi arrived at Camp Pendleton in a record time, because she was driving like crazy.

A young Marine approached her.

"Good morning, how may I help you?"

"Good morning. May I speak to General Mike Novack?"

"And may I ask who are you?"

"I'm Special Agent Kensi Blye, NCIS. I'm investigating the death of Lieutenant Colonel Daniel Langley. I've been told that his Commanding Officer is General Novack."

"Yes. He is over there. By the way, I'm Lance Corporal Wilson."

He showed Kensi a man with grey hair that was a little over 50.

"Thank you Lance Corporal Wilson."

Kensi approached General Novack. He was busy explaining something about an operation in the Middle East that required the help of the Marines.

"General Mike Novack?"

"Yes."

"Special Agent Kensi Blye, NCIS. I need to speak with you about one of your officers. Lieutenant Colonel Daniel Langley."

"Oh, Danny. Such a shame. He was a good officer."

"Do you know him personally? I mean out of the job."

"Yes, I know him well. I knew him."

"So, if you knew him well, I suppose you know that Daniel Langley wasn't his real name."

Novack looked like someone had just poured a hot water to his face.

"What are you talking about?"

"Look General, I'm here to investigate a murder and I'll appreciate every help I can get."

"But I know Daniel. And his real name was Daniel Langley."

"I'm sorry to have to tell you that Lt. Col. Daniel Langley died in Iraq in 2008. The man that died 2 days ago was David Lucas who assumed his identity."

Novack still looked surprised.

"I didn't know that agent Blye."

"Okay, never mind. What can you tell me about Lt. Col. Daniel Langley as you knew him?"

"He was commanding with a small base. Few good men I know were in his command. You can talk to them later if you like."

"What else? Did he go on missions or did some other work?"

"He attended few missions over the years. He was the Executive Officer of the base. He handled the logistics of every operation that was appointed to his base. You know, the manpower, the equipment, the strategy, those kind of stuff. Listen agent Blye, he was a born leader. He knew how to stand up for his own men and he never left a man behind."

"After all we've learned on Daniel Langley, I mean David Lucas, he wasn't a typical Devil Dog. He spent a year with a guy that had connections with a drug cartel and was dealing with weapons."

"As I said, I don't know anything about David Lucas. I may be able to help you with Daniel Langley, but I don't know any David Lucas. (Pause) Agent Blye, you seem to know Marine terminology very well."

"My father was a Marine. "

"So you know how's out here."

"Pretty much."

"Daniel knew how to do the job agent Blye. He was a born operative and I would've trusted my life with him. He was a loyal man. He was strong."

"Did he mention a friend of his, a certain Max Gentry?"

"Oh yeah. He mentioned him a lot. And some guy Ruiz. Him and Max were very good friends."

"So, I've heard. One more thing, General. Would you send us Daniel's file?"

"Of course. It's in my interest his killer to be caught."

"Thank you. Semper Fi, General."

"Semper Fi, Agent Blye."

"Where can I find those men from Lt. Col. Langley's team?"

"Right over there."

Kensi went down to the camp, at the far south end, where a team of 4 young men stood. She told them the same she told the General, but no one knew what to say about those information. They knew David Lucas as Daniel Langley. They weren't friends in private life so they couldn't be of much help. After a half an hour of dead-end Kensi thanked them and left.

After Kensi left Camp Pendleton in her Cadillac SRX, the General called someone on the phone.

"The NCIS is investigating the death of David… Yup, one agent just left. She was asking questions about his career. She mentioned Max Gentry… Ahm… Okay, you take care of the NCIS. And be sure to call me back on how's the contract going."

Something set off the alarm in Kensi's head. The General sounded too calm for a man that lost one of his own. Either he was involved in the murder or knew who killed David and was holding back. She called Eric on her way back to the Mission.

"Eric, find everything you can on General Mike Novack and his connection to David Lucas. He said that he didn't know anything, but I think he's lying."

"Okay. Callen and Sam are waiting for you. They were at the ME's office and they have a theory on the killing."

"What aren't you telling me?"

"I and Nell found something on David and they think that Deeks won't like it. They gave us time till tomorrow morning to verify every data that we discovered."

"Good."

...

* * *

**-In OPS-**

"What have you discovered that's so important?"

"David Lucas' file has been tempered with. It wasn't anything like he told Deeks. He knew exactly what was going on and he did it consciously. He worked with Ruiz, and possibly knew his associate, the big fish like Deeks said. And now, he is dead. We still don't know the reason why, but we will have info soon. Don't tell Deeks about it until we have solid proof."

"Okay."

Deeks entered the Mission.

…

* * *

**-In Nate's office-**

After two hours of talking and revealing his Max characteristics Deeks felt like the burden from all those years ago fell off his shoulders. To be honest, he even felt better. It was true what Nate said about talking to someone else and get the darkest thoughts out of your head, but Deeks never thought of the person that may actually listen to him. He trusted all of his team colleagues and they trusted him back, but the reality was far than perfect.

They all wore steel shields on the outside and have built a façade that no one could break through. Besides that, Deeks thought that if he started to talk about his past and demons he'll shatter all the peace they have.

Callen, for example lived alone for years, but now it seemed like he finally settled after meeting Joelle.

Sam had a perfect family and had ghosts of his own, didn't need Deeks' too.

Kensi returned completely changed from the mission in Afghanistan and he knew better than to talk about a past long forgotten with her, after she got home.

Hetty. Well, for Deeks it didn't seem right to talk to Hetty and explain about himself and his feelings. It was enough the naked feeling he had when she looked him with her big eyes through the glasses. He felt she knew him more than she was letting him to know about himself.

And, Nate was the last person that Deeks thought would be listening to all of his black and white spots.

But, here he was and there was nowhere to run.

"So, what do you think about the operation in 2006?"

"I think that my chief at that time, Lieutenant Mark Soriano was an asshole. I still think that he is. He finished the op before we even had a chance to catch the big fish."

"And why is that?"

"I don't know. But we were doing well. And when I mean well, I mean we had an iron-clad tight case against Marcos Ruiz and we were one step ahead of his supplier. All that we knew was that he was resident of LA, nothing else. No identity, no nothing. But if we waited for two more days, then I would've known his identity."

"I guess Max got really close to Ruiz, huh?"

"You have no idea. I was like Ruiz's shadow man. Since I've gone to make an offer we were meeting for two or three times a week so we can plan our next move. With his help we closed down three big chains of weapons trafficking. Of course he hadn't the slightest idea that his new partner of crime was also his enemy."

"Do you think that you'll find the answers now after all these years?"

"I hope so. Because if I don't it will be one forever enigma for me."

"You should talk to your partner about what you've just told me."

"Kensi? No man, I don't want to bother her with my adventures as Max "the Mad" Gentry. She has enough problems on her own. Add me and…"

"You should try Deeks and see where it will lead you. I've heard that you moved your thing a little bit. Maybe this will be step ahead. You know so much about her, but she doesn't know who you truly are. I think she deserves to know more about you and your past. I know it's painful and bitter, but you should talk to her. That will help your relationship and partnership.

"And it will help her to understand you better than she does now. Think about it Deeks. But if you decide to do that, do it one story at a time. You'll see that I'm telling the truth. It will get better."

"That's what I'm saying to myself my entire life Nate. That it will get better."

"Trust me on this own, Deeks. You can strengthen her trust, and also you can release all of your anger through your words without the need to kick someone's ass. I've finished with you for the day. I was thinking to interview you once or twice before you establish your cover. Just few angles to cover before you are fully prepared to go to Ruiz once again."

"Thanks Doc, see ya."

…

Deeks left the Mission and drove his red Chevrolet Malibu to one of the beaches on the LA coast. He always felt at peace near a beach, so he just went to one. He took off his shoes and walked to the edge of the water. He sat on the sand and watched the waves crash one upon another. He closed his eyes and thought of him and Kensi surfing on the waves and not having any worries at all.

He wished he had his surfboard with him, but quickly restrained himself as he tried to clear his head and think of what happened 8 years ago and reviewing his attitude as Max Gentry. The infamous Max Gentry.

He was interrupted in his thinking as a soft thump in the sand was heard.

"Will you tell me the whole background to this or I should go straight to the source?"

Deeks turned to his left to see his partner next to him, her eyes glittering on the LA sun just as the sun prepared to settle down.

"I waited for when you are ready. You know, I don't want to overwhelm you with this, it's enough hard for me."

"Pfff. Deeks, we are partners, we are friends. You can tell me everything that's bothering you. You know what Nate says for these things. 'You should tell someone what's bothering you so it gets easier on you…'"

"'… and the burden you carry with you is cut in half.' Yep, Nate is right. I just spent two hours with him discussing the case and Max's life and he said that exact thing. That I should tell you everything."

"So? What are you waiting for?"

"I don't know Kens. It seems like it will swallow me down to the bone if I start to open up the old wounds."

"I'm here to heal them Deeks. You don't have to be afraid of yourself and your past. You are who you are and I'm not afraid of you. I don't care about Max or what you did in the past. I care about Deeks I know now, and nothing will change that."

"Wait until you listen to all of Max's assignments."

"I don't need Max to know Deeks."

She meant what she said. She took Deeks' hand in hers and for a moment everything stopped. It was just them, and the waves.

"Deeks feel free to tell me everything that you keep buried inside of you. I'll be there for you. Every step you take on this journey. Now, talk me about David and the case."

"Okay." Deeks took a shaky breath. "So… my story starts in 2006. To be exact, June of 2006. One morning, Deeks got up, got ready for work and arrived at LAPD. He was called by his chief in the office to be briefed for the new case. The case was about the murder of two of our own and weapons trafficking. Pistols, revolvers, guns, you name it. But, most of the time he was dealing with AK-47s. The guy's name was Marcos Ruiz. He was a Latino man that came from Mexico to take over the job from his predecessor Gerald Hughes.

"Marcos had contacts with the Mexicans, with the Russians, with the Brazilians, even with some guys from Bosnia and Serbia that worked for little money. You show them bills, they'll kill a man and they wouldn't even ask who they'll kill or why they should do that. Never mind, this Ruiz guy killed two cops that morning and the LAPD wanted him, dead or alive. My job was to use my alias Max Gentry and get close enough to Ruiz, to gather intel and when there's enough info, to make an arrest."

Deeks stopped for a second and swallowed the lump in his throat before he continued with his story.

"I thought this job would be easy, but it appeared to be harder and harder with each passing day. One month after the mission begun, Max met David Lucas. He worked small jobs for Ruiz, but he was a good kid. He liked Max from the day he met him. Max was playing his tough guy stance, the guy that will punch you if you say his name wrong, but Lucas didn't mind it. They got out few times, had fun. You know, at that point I almost lost my dark side, and Deeks surfaced. David pulled my soft side and I struggled between the asshole that Max was and the angelic Marty Deeks. I chose a mix of those two personas.

"I told him that I was planning on doing some big business for Ruiz, so to speak. He believed my story and told me everything he knew. I stored everything in my place. I catalogued everything. 3 months after the mission started we were closer to Ruiz than any other agency in the USA was for years. That's when Max stepped in."

Kensi imagined Deeks with leather jacket and riding on a bike and she wanted to ride with him right now, but his voice kept her present with him on the beach.

"So, I talk to my chief and he says "Detective now is your turn to walk in the pack of wolves." That meant that I should get in the game. I stumble in the place where Ruiz used to go out. I get in like a cowboy, you know I kick the door and call for Ruiz. He turns around, I see him, he sends me his death glare and I send mine. He says "Who are you?" I say "I'm Max Gentry. I have a job for you." And from now on your hero's alias starts to earn Ruiz's trust."

Kensi smiled at the last remark about the hero.

"So, I'm in. I've learned some of the clients of Ruiz. One Russian guy and two guys from a Mexican drug cartel. I told my chief and he says, stay there, we're almost done. We needed the big fish. The guy that worked with Ruiz and was a Los Angeles native. Or at least, we thought so. Three more months go by. In between my bond with David got stronger. He told me about his family, how he was an only male in the house. He lost his father when he was 10, and grew up with his mother and three sisters. I never said anything about me or where I came from. So, here he is one day, he comes to me with a handful of papers.

"My life, or to be exact Max's entire life was on it. He researched me and put together a file about his friend Max Gentry. He said that he was afraid of me first, but then he got to know me and he relaxed in my company. He said that he wanted to be my friend. I said that I am a loner and because of what I do, don't have many friends. He says, "I'll take the stake, just let us be friends." Okay, said Max. And we were very good friends. Oh God, as I get older I become more emotional."

He wiped the tears that were holding at the back of his eyes.

"One day the chief called me and said that we need to move in. I said, no way, there's so much to do yet, but he insisted on closing the operation down. David was there too. When LAPD stormed in, the first thing I did was warn David to run, but he got caught. I put up one hell of a fight to avoid arrest, so I could add to the show. He was screaming "Show them Max! Show them who you really are!" Poor David. He didn't even have a chance to find out that I was fighting my own people. I never saw him again. He saw me in cuffs and he had this sad puppy look, like he was disappointed, but glad that I fought hard. I never had a chance to see him again."

"Why?" the question left Kensi's mouth before she even knew that.

"Because of the work. And the fear of what he might say if he found out who I really was. That I am LAPD detective Marty Deeks and that I used him. Now, I'll never know what he knew."

"You shouldn't push yourself this much Deeks. I know that your conscience is telling you something else, but right now you put in that head of yours that it's not your fault he got killed. He was playing a role that was far beyond his possibilities and he got killed. Maybe it's somehow connected with the Marines, and the case has nothing to do with it."

"Somehow I doubt that Kens. I wish it is like you say, but I have this hunch that says Max's past has returned once again to haunt me."

Deeks lowered his head down and tried to hold his tears back, but they found their way out. His vision was blurred, but he felt his partner take his head in her arms and turned it towards her. She spoke in an altered voice mimicking Mammy Two Shoes.

"Listen Deeks, you better catch that mouse or you'll get kicked out of the house!"

Deeks smiled at that comment and knew that Kensi did that so he would relax a little and let the beast inside stay locked just for a while, at least for the time he spent with his partner and friend. 'Cause at that moment for Marty Deeks, the two most important things were Special Agent Kensi Blye and the waves that calmed his soul every time he came back to them.

He wiped the last tear and whispered as he lowered his head on Kensi's shoulder.

"Yes boss, I will catch that mouse."

They spent some time on the beach and then drove to Deeks' apartment in his red Malibu. Kensi watched the last rays of LA sun fade away as the dark settled in. On the way to his home, they bought burgers and a six pack of beer.

…

* * *

**-The morning on 28.12.2014-**

Nell and Eric spent another sleepless night in front of the computer screen. The whole night they were looking for a connection between Lucas and the General, but nothing came up.

However, they checked every piece of information on David Lucas' file and they were sure that it was tempered.

"Callen, its Nell. We have proof. You can come and see the results of our search."

...


	4. Undercover

**Chapter 4 - Undercover**

* * *

When it comes to undercover work, it's always difficult. You get to go as a character that's not you and you give your best so the plan will be successful.

But in the case of the LAPD detective Martin A. Deeks it was different. He used his alias Max Gentry too many times and for him, it was easy to get dressed like it and act like he is another person. Like Kensi once said, sometimes it's easier to be someone else.

In Deeks' case it was easy, but at the same time difficult as the dark aspects of Max's character surfaced above the ground.

Max Gentry was more like a version of Gordon John Brandel and Deeks himself knows it, but he cannot overcome it fully.

When you go undercover you give your best so you can complete the mission without revealing yourself. That's why it's called undercover. Sometimes it takes courage to go and do what you have to do to save lives.

For Deeks the saving lives parts was troubling. It was a two-blade sword that can cut both sides, the attacker and his victim. You get to save lives, but almost always there's collateral damage.

Max Gentry never went that far as to kill someone, but he did horrible things to gain info. He intimidated people, beat them and mocked them. He even used death threats to their families, but never killed.

Max Gentry was the reason because of why people were killed. In almost every operation someone related to him died.

But, at this point Marty Deeks told himself that Max Gentry of this operation will be a little bit different. He'll be darker and meaner than ever. He'll be an asshole who is not afraid of nothing, not ever his own shadow. In this new transformation Deeks allowed himself to become Gordon John Brandel's eviler twin.

On the other side his own persona, the LAPD detective was positive, happy, funny a real joker. But, the truth that he never admitted to himself was that his happy go lucky side was all about to cover his pained childhood. The fact that Deeks went to dark places when needed, and sometimes even when not needed was enough to tell the unforgotten story of a kid that wanted peaceful and undisturbed childhood. What he got was a father that beat the shit out of him whenever he got a chance. His father was like a curse.

That morning of 28th of December, Sunday, Marty Deeks woke up with these thoughts. He thought about his transformation as Max Gentry and about his childhood. He thought of Isaac Sidorov and the drill. He thought of the countless times he was hurt in his life. And he decided that he should clear his head before he headed to the Mission later that day.

He opened up the closet where he kept his surf boards. He looked at the last one in his collection. A Christmas gift from Kensi. It was ocean blue with stripes and a cloud design. He took his surfing gear and took off to the nearest beach. He left a short note for Kensi in case she woke up while he's gone and start to look for him.

_**Dear Kensi, I'll go surfing. Yours Deeks.**_

He left a red rose on top of the note and got out. Like every other surfer, Deeks knew that the waves were the best in the morning, when no one was present and when it's quiet. He put on his suit, took the board and headed towards the water. While riding in the waves, he let his thoughts delve more into his troubled past and long forgotten identity of Max Gentry, his alter ego.

…

Kensi woke up at 7 a.m. and the first thing she noticed was that Deeks wasn't there. But she quickly retrieved the note with the rose and thought of how romantic he could be at times. She replayed the last night while she made coffee and breakfast for the two of them. She knew that he'll be back soon and hungry.

* * *

…

The life of the kid named Martin Brandel wasn't easy. To live with a father like he had, was bad enough to wish you were never born. He always wondered why his dad beat him up when he did nothing to deserve it. He always found his numerous reasons to humiliate and punish his son for the person he was.

Gordon John Brandel was a man that you wouldn't want it near you or your basement. He was one heavy drunk and drank from sunrise till sunset. He was dark, mean, and cold kind of man that hated all the people in the world. No one was good enough for him. Not even his son.

He still remembered the day of January 8th 1979 when Martin was born. He celebrated the labor of his only child and the man in which he will grow up.

Three days and three nights he celebrated and was drinking. That's when the abuse of alcohol started.

The first few years of Martin's life were good. Not great, but good. He even witnessed the loving and caring John Gordon Brandel. But, that didn't last for long.

At first, Gordon saw his son as a rebel. He wouldn't listen to his father's orders, he let his hair grow and refused to cut it. He always watched Tom and Jerry and other stupid cartoons. And he loved to collect model trains. God he hated trains. And here were the comic books.

One day, he went to the bar just outside of the house and drank a lot. That night was Martin's 6th birthday. His mother prepared a chocolate cake and called some of Marty's friends to the party.

Marty was smiling and happy because he was a big kid now. He wasn't baby anymore. He was joking around with the other kids when his father entered the house, drunk. Again.

The other kids got scared and ran through the door. Only Ray stayed.

"Ray, go home."

"No way Marty, I'm not leaving you alone."

"Please Ray, you don't have to do this."

"You little bastard! Go home and don't come back!"

Ray knew that Marty's dad was weird guy, but the rage he had in his eyes now made him to think that not just that Gordon Brandel was weird, he was crazy too. He didn't have other choice than to leave.

"Okay, Mr. Brandel. Bye, Ms. Brandel."

"Bye Ray."

She swallowed her tears because she knew what was next. He was doing that to her since Marty was born, but always she was the only victim. Now, he picked on Marty.

"Happy birthday son."

"Thanks dad."

Marty knew something was wrong, but he knew better than to ask his mother.

They sat and ate from the cake. After that Marty went to sleep. He woke up in the middle of the night, when he heard someone screaming. It came from the living room. He walked on tiptoes and saw his father beating his mother. She screamed and pleaded, but he seemed obsessed from the Devil itself.

Marty got out of his hideout and spoke loud and clear. He didn't know from where it came the courage in his voice, but he spoke up for the first time in his life.

"Stop!"

His father twisted his head and looked him like he was watching his worst enemy.

"What are you doing here? - He growled."

"I said stop! Stop hurting her!"

The words had their effect and Gordon Brandel stopped. But, then he came to Marty and pulled him by his hair. He threw him on the floor and started hitting him like he was a sack full of debris.

"Just… who… do… you… think… you… are… talking… to… huh?! Who?!"

He continued hitting Marty until he went unconscious.

After that day Marty never smiled the same again. Not until he left his father's home.

* * *

…

Deeks got out of the water and changed his clothes. His hair was damp from the surfing, but he didn't care. His only concern was Max and his establishment.

When he entered his apartment he smelled breakfast. He saw Kensi preparing toasts with butter and on the table were served fried eggs.

"I see you were busy, while I was gone."

"I decided to surprise you, so when you get back from surfing, you eat something and then we'll head to OSP."

"Thanks Kens." He kissed her on the cheek.

"You don't have to thank me Deeks. I did it with love. Now, sit down and eat. It's an order."

"Yes General Blye." He gestured a salute with his right hand.

They both sat down and ate in silence. Kensi was certain that something was cooking up in his head. But, she decided to leave it there and to have her partner just for herself the way it is. After yesterday's conversation with the Lieutenant Colonel's supervisor she was confused and didn't know how would Deeks react to the things she learned about David's past.

Deeks' phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hey Deeks, it's Callen."

"Hey Callen. What's up?"

"Come to OSP, ASAP. Eric found something. You need to see this."

"I'm on my way."

"What's going on?"

"I don't know. Callen says that Eric found something. I have to go."

"Wait. I'll go with you."

"Okay. Grab your bag and meet me in the car."

* * *

…

**-In OPS-**

"Hey guys. Good morning."

Callen and Sam had death glares on them and Eric and Nell were darn serious.

"Eric, show him what you recovered."

"Yesterday, I got the hard disk from David's computer, as you know and I was able to recover some of the documents on his computer that were deleted prior to his death. Mostly those were files from missions he attended, but these files were what surprised me the most."

On the screen showed up pictures of Deeks, Kensi, Callen and Sam.

"What's this?"

"This means that David Lucas was following you Deeks."

"And that's not all." Nell said "This is surveillance video from the ATM of your bank where you withdraw money regularly. Your withdrawal of money few weeks ago."

"And?"

"Look at the car that's parked just across the street. The yellow one. Now, when I zoom in, our driver is…"

"David Lucas."

"Exactly. He was following you. He took pictures of you, and he knew who you were."

"I can't believe this is happening."

"This means that if he knew who you are…"

"… so does Ruiz. If David was able to find out that I was undercover, then my position is as good as compromised."

"You still want to go there Deeks?"

"Sam, this is our only chance. If I don't go in there as Max, we will lose our only chance to find David's killer."

"What if Ruiz killed him?"

"Then we will arrest him. But, let me get in first and then we'll talk about that. If we go on the front door now, that means we'll lose our chance to find out who the big guy with the weapons is and find David's killer."

"And if we go on the back door you could get yourself killed. Is that what you want?"

"No, but we don't have choice here. Either we play like this, or we'll get played."

"Guys, that's not everything I recovered. Remember those documents I told you about? Well, he managed to put hidden messages in between lines. When I decoded them I realized that he knew more than he was telling you Deeks. He wasn't just a helping hand to Ruiz. He was in the business all along. Right from the beginning."

"I knew he was hiding something. I told you Deeks."

"No, Callen that just can't be."

"Well, it is. Do you still think that David was good guy?"

Deeks said nothing as another set of files appeared on the screen. Nell tapped on the screen and expanded them.

"You said that David told you that his father died at 10 and he grew up with his mother and three sisters, right?"

"Yes."

"Well, I hate to disappoint you, but he didn't have sisters and his father is alive and well. As a matter of fact he is in a nursing home."

"But, how…"

"Look at these files."

Nell tapped on the screen some more and hospital records from five different hospitals were shown. Fractured hand, broken leg, bruised body, head wound, black eye. Déjà vu all over again. His dad was abusing him like Gordon John Brandel was abusing Marty.

"Are you sure that…"

"Positive. I checked everything twice."

"So he was lying to me all along. And I thought he was my friend. He wanted to be my friend. We were close... How could he do that?"

"There are people that lead double life my friend."

"But why? I trusted him."

"Sometimes, Mr. Deeks the people are not what we expect them to be." Hetty appeared out of nowhere as usual.

Deeks was on the edge and the only thing that prevented him from not breaking something in OSP was Hetty Lange herself.

He realized that he was hurt too many times and this added to the fact that he was the favorite character to play with. Just when he thought that he gained someone's trust there was always something that showed him that the reality sucked.

First his dad, then the LAPD, then the NCIS. Whenever he wanted to fit in somewhere it proved to be false hope. After Sidorov it was different. He earned the trust of Sam and Callen and what's more important, lately he moved on with Kensi and their thing. But, now he felt played again.

Kensi felt that Deeks was about to explode and put her hand on his arm.

"Deeks…"

"Don't! Leave me alone."

Deeks left the Operations Center.

"Kens, go!"

Kensi followed her partner in the rest room where he was about to start breaking things out. He was furious and angry like wounded animal. Well, he had the right to be mad about what he learned, but still he had to gain control over his actions.

"Deeks…"

"I said I want to be alone."

"Deeks, please talk to me. Don't push me away from you."

"I don't want to talk, okay?"

"Listen Deeks, I know that you're angry at David right now, but you need to focus on the task we have right now and put your feelings aside."

"To put my feelings aside?! This is about me Kensi, all about me. He lied to me all along. He played with me. I'm tired of being played. I'm like the favorite guy in town for playing games."

"Marty, I know that you've been through a lot, but you need to regain your coolness."

"Well you are right about that. I've been through a lot. And I pulled myself out of that shit. All by myself. No one was there to help me. Even my mother blamed me that I was the cause for her altercations with my dad. She used to say that I was a worthless kid and that she's sorry that she brought me to this world!"

Kensi backed up a little bit from the last words about Deeks' mother. How could she do that? He was her son. He was the only good thing that got out from that marriage and she blamed him for who he was?

"I'm so sorry Deeks… I didn't know that."

"Well, now you know!"

His words stabbed her right through the chest but she knew that was Max's words, not Deeks'.

"Deeks you are not David."

"Well, I feel like I am. His dad didn't give a crap about him, either. He was so helpless that he…"

Shit.

"David wasn't you Marty. Realize it! You are a lot better than he was. Maybe he looked like nice kind of guy, but he wasn't. He hurt a lot of people through the years."

"Yeah, but he was troubled kid just like I was."

"He was and he decided to become a bad guy. I know what is like to be haunted by your demons from the past, but he never let go of that. He became a monster just like his father."

"What are you trying to tell me Kens? That I'm like my father?"

"Not you Deeks. Max Gentry is. Max Gentry is a reincarnation of Gordon John Brandel. Not you."

"But, I'm not Max. Max is just one alias. A name with a character created to act as a tough guy."

"Yes, that's what I'm trying to tell you all along. You were abused as a child in a ways that no one can ever understand, but a sick mind like your dad had. But, you grew up to be better than he was. You grew up and took a law degree. You went to Police Academy. You earned a badge and a status among the world. Hell, you work with Federal Agents. That's who you are Marty. Not Max, not Gordon. They are abusers. You are not. You are different. You are Martin Deeks and you are one hell of a good guy that fights crime. You got to stand up to the test and show them all that you're not weak. That you're strong. That you are not afraid of showing who you truly are. You are not Max, Deeks. You are one and only and that means you are going to stop with hurting yourself because of what you endured as a child. That won't go easy. Neither will the thing with Sidorov. I'll be there for you every step on the way. I love you more than my life. And I'll love you with all your virtues and flaws. You can be whoever you want to be, but the Deeks, I know is kind, loving and caring. I wouldn't change that. Never ever."

She took his hand in her hands and she looked at his ocean blue eyes.

"And I know that you'll do the same thing for me Marty. I know that, 'cause I know you better than you know yourself. And now is the time to let go all of your negative thoughts and pick up the joyful side of life."

"Well, it's not that easy Kensi. And right now I don't know what's true or what's false. Love you Kens. Forgive me for being an ass over the years."

"Deeks…"

He cut her sentence when he placed his lips on hers and kissed her. Then, he left the rest room. Kensi got upstairs.

"Guys, please don't leave him alone. I'm afraid that he's going to do something to himself."

"Eric, camera."

"On it. Okay, according to the camera number 11, he's going to the men's room."

"Okay we're on it."

He went to the men's room and locked the door. He vomited and rinsed his mouth hundred times until he couldn't feel it anymore. He wanted to erase the feeling of betrayal that was etched deep in his soul.

…

Callen and Sam tried to open the door, but it was locked.

"Deeks, open the door!"

"Don't do this, man! He is not worth it!"

"Do you think what I think Sam?"

"Yes. Let's do it."

Just before they entered, they heard heartbreaking scream.

They both kicked the door.

* * *

…

He looked himself in the mirror and suddenly his reflection in the mirror wasn't his. It was Gordon John Brandel's. Then it changed to David's expression. And at last, his reflection was the one that Max had on his face when he was in action.

Deeks tightened his hand into a fist and punched the glass. The mirror shattered to little pieces and his hand was bleeding. He screamed and tore his hair apart. He screamed so loud that Callen and Sam kicked the door so they can get in.

What they saw scared the hell out of them. Deeks had dark look on his face, blood dripping from his hand and his hair disheveled. His eyes were steel blue like they were frozen in place. A realization dawned on them as they saw their friend becoming Max Gentry in front of their eyes.

* * *

…

Marcos Ruiz was born in Mexico City in 1967. He was the son of an arms dealer, Ramon Ruiz, who owned a company that was dealing with golf gear. It was easier to hide the weapons under the golf clubs because they couldn't be detected.

Marcos helped his dad since he was kid and learned the business at a young age. Dealing with weapons was his destiny.

In 2006, he took the job in LA from Gerald Hughes that was killed in a shoot-out. He established his net almost immediately after he took over. The work was doing great till two cops showed up in the warehouse and he had to kill them. He knew that he'd be investigated and eventually caught, but he never expected to be that fast. Six months later on 25th of December 2006, he was arrested. He was sentenced to 10 years in prison, because not many of his actual crime that he committed were proved. After 5 years, he was released on parole.

His helping hand David Lucas was arrested too. And now 8 years later, he was killed. He recognized the style of the killer and was wondering when he'll show up again. He was one sick son of a bitch, but he was good associate. He supplied him one of the best weapons in the world. No questions asked, no identities revealed. He knew him as Michael Leland, which of course wasn't his real name. He lived in LA, but his accent told him he was from overseas, Eastern Europe maybe. But, until today he had no idea who he was or where he was from. He knew that if he was back then everything will be turned upside down. Storm. The only word that Marcos Ruiz was able to connect to the mystery man. His nickname was Storm.

* * *

...

Sam and Callen stood in place while they were watching Deeks fall apart. Sam decided to step in and take him out, but he backed down when he saw Deeks raising his arms to protect himself. He spoke in a low voice, almost crying.

"Please, don't hurt me daddy."

Sam and Callen looked at each other to be sure that they heard right. Deeks was pleading them to not hurt him? What the hell was in his head? He thought they were his father?

"Deeks, it's Sam and Callen, we're not going to hurt you."

Sam slowly stepped into the bathroom. He took one step at a time closing the gap between him and Deeks. He took Deeks by his arms and pulled him towards the door. He felt Deeks' head sway around like he was drunk. He took Deeks by the shoulders and took him out of the Mission. That's when Deeks went unconscious.

* * *

…

**-Few days later-**

In the Office of Special Projects dawned another day. All of the agents currently working there were busy catching up with paperwork after the holiday finished. All, except the elite team of three agents and one detective that spent the holiday working. They were making the last preparations for their assignment. They were going in like employer on the port and as tourists. Only Deeks was going undercover under his alias Max Gentry.

The last few days, Eric and Nell were busy working on Ruiz's personal data. He got out of prison in 2011, and he was again running his business, but he tended it to be a low profile business, because he was still on parole and if he was doing big shipments he would set off an alarm and the last thing he wanted was that. They located his house and the workplace that was now at the port. He engaged new people to be his bodyguards and he used the newest technology to gain access to all potential job offers.

So, the plan was next. Deeks will enter through the front door as a friend from long ago. Kensi, Sam and Callen will be close in case things got ugly. He will tell Ruiz about Lucas's death and the suspicion that LAPD has on him and that he is here to help him out of it. It sounded like a perfect plan with plenty of possibilities to go wrong, but it was worth the try. If danger was foreseen, then the three musketeers will step in and save the fourth.

Deeks prepared his Triumph Bonneville 100, Steve McQueen Edition motorcycle. He put on his leather jacket, the one that Hetty gave to him and adjusted the helmet on his head. As soon as he put the motorcycle in gear he pressed on the gas. The engine revved.

As the bike started moving Deeks looked once again at the Spanish Mission and closed his eyes. He knew that this mission was dangerous and that he might not come back after all.

He opened his eyes and headed to another undercover mission as Max Gentry.

* * *

...

**-At the Marina-**

Sam took his position as a worker on the port, while Kensi and Callen took their positions as a married couple, tourists that came to LA on a honeymoon. Outside the Marina, was waiting another team comprised of NCIS agents and a SWAT team in case something wrong happened or if things went upside down.

In general, the plan was well thought out and in case Ruiz smelled that Deeks wasn't the person that he said to be, his colleagues would be able to affect on the outcome immediately and to prevent greater catastrophe.

When Deeks entered in his office, Marcos Ruiz was in the middle of a phone call. He stopped when he saw the familiar face.

"Te voy a llamar más tarde." (I will call you later)

…

"Eric is the video on?"

"Yup Sam. Feed coming to your laptops."

'What did he say?"

"He said that he will call someone back, later."

"Can you trace the call?"

"I'll try."

…

"Max…"

"Marcos. How are you?"

"Fine. You?"

"Well, I've been better."

"What… what's going on?"

"David was killed few days ago."

"Yeah, I know. I've heard about that."

"You've heard about that? And you said nothing?"

His tone was harsh.

"I thought you were out of business since they arrested you."

"As you can see I'm not. Did you kill David, Marcos?"

"No, I wouldn't do that. You know how close he was too me."

"Yeah, I know. And he was my friend too. I don't know if you heard about this, but Max has very few friends. And if he loses a friend he's really pissed. Very, very pissed!"

He almost growled when he said the word pissed. His eyes changed their color from ocean blue to steel blue in a second.

"Easy, Max."

"I have a friend in the LAPD. Called me yesterday and said they think it's you."

"Me? Come on Max, you know me."

"I knew you 8 years ago. I don't know you today."

"Max please, this is not me. But, I'm pretty sure who might've done it."

"Who?"

"I can't say…"

"Who the hell killed David, Marcos?"

Max took Ruiz by his collar.

"I don't… know… his… real… name… I can't… breathe…"

Max was tightening his grip around Ruiz's neck.

"Michael… His name was Michael Leland. I don't know if it's his real name… Let me go Max."

Deeks kept the collar of Ruiz's shirt in his fists for few more seconds making an eye contact with the arms dealer to send a message of what would happen, if he lied. Then, he released Ruiz and tapped the mic twice so he can be sure that Eric heard the name.

"On it Deeks."

"Sorry Marcos. I had to do it."

"You bastard. You almost strangled me and you're saying that you're sorry?"

"I had to, okay? Don't look at me like that. People change. How could I possibly know what it weren't you that switched off the lights?"

Ruiz punched Deeks hard on the face and he actually fell backwards.

"Now, we're even. Tell me what you really came for Max?"

"We have unfinished business from 8 years ago. Remember Christmas of 2006?"

"Of course I remember Max. It was the day we got arrested. I will never forget that day. What about it?"

"We were supposed to get the weapons two days after Christmas and give your client his arms. What happened to them?"

"I don't know. I guess Storm never came to do the exchange. Storm is Leland's nickname, by the way."

Deeks could hear Eric's voice on his ear com.

"Comparing that to the data in 2006, hold on…"

"Where's the case with weapons?"

"I don't know. LAPD must've gotten it, 'cause few days after the arrest I sent one of my buddies to check and it wasn't there."

"You mean it wasn't where we left it?"

"No, it wasn't."

"It wasn't taken by the LAPD. It's not in the catalogue for things were taken on that day."

"How'd you know that?"

For an instant Deeks thought that he blew up his cover, but he was too good to back up now.

"I, um… you know, my buddy at the LAPD told me everything about the raid. We are really close, and well, when I asked him, he agreed to tell me a little more about what happened that day."

For a moment Ruiz suspected that something was wrong, but he couldn't point his finger on what ticked him off about Max.

"So, you want to finish the business from 2006."

"Yup. I found a buyer. And since I thought you had the weapons… Let's just say that it will cut me the expenses in half if I already had the weapons and I didn't have to actually transport them from the other end of the world. He won't be in LA for a long time and he needs the weapons for a quick business. Get in, shoot some guys, get out, LAX and hasta la vista baby."

"I guess Leland took them. But, if you want to buy them I could make a contact with Leland. At least I can try and see where it goes."

"I don't want to buy them. My friend does."

"Okay, your friend. I can make a contact with Leland and call you back. Is that okay for you?"

"Yes it is. Thanks Marcos. Sorry again about that thing earlier. And sorry I suspected you."

"Well, I've been through a lots in my life Max and I don't give a shit about what you think of me or if I killed anyone. As I said earlier, we're even."

"Call me as soon as possible. The clock is ticking."

"I will. Nos vemos pronto, Max." (See you soon, Max)

Ruiz pronounced the name Max with an accent.

"Si, Marcos, nos vemos." (Yes Marcos. See you.)

Deeks' Spanish had improved from the one 8 years ago. He got out of Ruiz's office and started the engine of the motorcycle. He rode back to the Mission. He thought about him overreacting earlier when he tried to strangle Ruiz, but he quickly waved that thought convinced it was the right thing to do to maintain his cover.

He was going to see his workplace once more, after all. Sam and Callen followed Deeks in the Challenger and Kensi in the Caddy. Sam and Callen shut off their coms so they can talk freely without anyone overhearing what they were saying.

"What do you think about Deeks?"

"I don't know Sam. You saw him in the bathroom few days ago. He transformed in Max in a sec and he broke the glass with his bare hand. Then he blacked out and after he woke up he wouldn't say anything. I'm worried."

"Join the club. It seems to me like he recovered too soon."

"He would do anything to save his friends and he'll go beyond borders if some of them are killed, you heard him back there."

"He is loyal. And determined. He showed that to us more than once. He'll find a way to close this down."

"But he is losing it. What if…"

"Don't go there G. He'll get over it."

But, Sam himself wasn't sure in the words that he has just spoken.

* * *

They all entered the Mission together and headed to OSP, where Eric, Nell and Hetty were waiting for them. Deeks spoke first.

"So, what did you find on Michael Leland, Eric?"

"Not much. He spent a lot of time in and out of Los Angeles for years before he moved permanently here in 2005. He lived in LA for a while and in 2007 he moved out shortly after the raid. He came back to LA in 2014, two days before David Lucas was killed."

"The theory of him killing David, holds up. What else?"

"You are not going to like this."

"And why not?"

"Leland is not his real name. It's an alias. His real name is Kristijan Tanevski."

"He is from Macedonia." Nell continued "For those who didn't know it's a small country in the Balkans. He was born there and grew up there. He came to LA in 2005 on a working visa. He worked at Fed Ex Office Print &amp; Ship Center, at 8539 West Sunset Boulevard in West Hollywood. His home address was on North Sierra Bonita Avenue. He assumed the identity of Michael Leland and was working with Ruiz. There are hundreds of documents on David's hard drive that show the connection between the two of them. The entire file of Kristijan Tanevski is sent to your e-mails."

"So, what does a guy like Tanevski at Fed Ex?"

"I don't know, but I'm on it."

"Good. Eric, what about the phone call?"

"Nothing. It was incoming phone call from throw-away cell phone. After the call, the cell was disconnected. Best guess ditched in some alley in a dumpster. However, I was able to pinpoint the location of the call in West Hollywood, but the area is large."

"Okay, you keep tracking that phone number to see if you can find who bought the cell phone. West Hollywood is the place where Tanevski lived in 2006, we should consider that as an opportunity to find if he's there now. Keep working and on Michael Leland's file and the life of Kristijan Tanevski in Macedonia. Guys, let's get down."

"Wait. Deeks, you need to know something else."

"Didn't you two just tell us what the important thing was?"

"Yes, but that's not the important thing in all of this Deeks."

Deeks looked at Nell and Eric like he's seen a ghost.

"There's an Inspector in the Macedonian Police Department that is following Tanevski's movements through the years. She is staying in LA for the past two weeks. Approximately for the time being when Leland showed up and probably killed David Lucas."

"Well, why she hasn't contacted us, yet?"

"She did contact the State Department Mr. Deeks. They alerted the FBI and the CIA. One old friend from the CIA told me on the phone when he heard we took the case. We spoke on the phone and I arranged a meeting in half an hour."

"What's her name?"

"Here's the tricky part, Mr. Deeks. Her name is… Hope Brandel."

...


	5. Hope Brandel

**Chapter 5 - Hope Brandel**

* * *

**-Few days ago-**

Deeks blacked out as soon as Sam and Callen took him out of the Mission. Sam picked him up and put him in the back seat of the Challenger. He and Callen climbed up and Sam drove to the closest hospital. Kensi followed them in her Cadillac. She was worried about Deeks like hell. He looked so tired, like the walls crushed on him. For the 4 years they worked together as partners she never saw Deeks so dark and intense. Even when he came back from Sidorov's torture, he handled the PTSD well, maybe not too well, but he succeeded regaining the love for his life.

Today, he was different. He was being Max in Deeks' skin. He was violent and hurt himself. She thought that the burden that was buried inside of Deeks must've been very heavy for him to hurt himself like he did. She was worried for him, now when their thing moved forward. She felt like she may crack too, if she saw him again in some of Max's moods, but she forced herself to be strong and bold, both for him and for her. Like he was when she came back from Afghanistan.

Deeks regained consciousness on the way to the hospital.

"Where am I?"

"We're taking you to the hospital to be checked out."

He noticed his bleeding hand, but said nothing. It hurt like hell, but he didn't give a damn right now. He closed his eyes and replayed the events prior to his blackout. He felt ashamed because his colleagues and friends saw him like enraged animal, and he was afraid to say something, anything that may do more harm than good.

"You want to talk about the thing in the men's room Deeks?"

Callen's glassy blue eyes locked with Deeks' ocean blues. For that one split of the second Callen witnessed the shame and fear gathered in Deeks' soul. He also saw a child that never grew up. That never fit in anywhere. He remembered all those times he and Sam pulled a prank on him and joked with him, but now he saw for real how vulnerable Deeks person was a person. He might have taken the jokes with a smile, but inside he felt like an outsider.

Callen knew the feeling all too well.

He wished he could change those times in the past, but here they were and he promised silently to himself that he'll do whatever is in his power to make Deeks comfortable from now on. He knew that the blonde detective had hard time to gain the team's trust, but after all that happened Callen saw his chance to apologize and help Deeks with whatever was going through his brain.

He realized that the whole time they worked with Deeks, he and Sam knew very little about him and that had to change. They were so focused on other things that they forgot Deeks had feelings of his own and that he deserved to be happy. That he deserved to be understood from his friends and colleagues.

It was never too late to make changes. And Callen was sure as hell to make those changes happen for good.

"No, I don't."

"Okay. Whenever you're ready."

Deeks was surprised that Callen let the matter drop. Knowing Callen, he would push the matter till its very end, but now it seemed like he was tired of questioning his actions.

Deeks eased his head on the backseat and let his thoughts drift again to the past that was so painful. He was thinking of the day his father broke his arm and almost stabbed him with the scissors.

…

* * *

**(Flashback)**

_It was Saturday, and Marty was supposed to go out with his friend Ray to the park and after that they were supposed to watch TV at Ray's home, but that never happened. _

_Also, it was one of John Gordon Brandel's bad days when he started drinking from sunrise. By noon he was already drunk and swaying on his unsteady feet. But his fist was ironclad. _

_These bad days happened often enough so Marty thought of killing himself too many times. He wasn't always the strongest. He was desperate at times. And he was alone in the world. Unprotected and alone child that just wanted to be happy and like the other kids._

_When Marty entered the kitchen, that Saturday, to ask him for permission to go out, Gordon was finishing his last Chivas Regal. _

"_What do you want, you little filthy bastard?"_

"_Dad… um… I want to go with Ray in the park."_

"_Where?!"_

"_In the park."_

"_Marty, you have 11 years, for God's sake! What park, what hell! You're staying home!"_

"_But, Ray and I…"_

"_Ray, Ray, Ray! It's always Ray! He is screwing up your brain kid. You shouldn't hang out with him."_

_Marty almost cried when his father wouldn't let him go out with Ray. He despised Ray Martindale. _

"_Do I see tears in your eyes Marty?"_

"_No, there are no…"_

"_Oh, yes, I see tears in your eyes. How many times do I have to tell you that true men never cry, huh?! How many?!"_

_He pulled Marty by the hair and pushed him on the floor. He took off his belt and started beating Marty. At one point Marty got up and tried to run, but Brandel eventually took hold of him by his left hand and twisted it backwards. Marty screamed at the searing pain that flared through his left arm. His father continued beating him till he couldn't breathe anymore. And then he took the scissors. _

_Marty closing his eyes, waited for his father to kill him. If he killed him now, he would've eased his pain and fulfill the wish that Marty had for some time now. Then he heard his mother's voice._

"_That's enough Gordon. Leave the kid alone for one day, please."_

_Marty thought that his mother was next, but he was wrong. Gordon Brandel took his leather jacket and slammed the front door shut disappearing to God knows where._

_Marty hugged his mother. If it wasn't for her, he would've been dead by now. She didn't respond to his hug. It was like she wanted Marty to stay away from her. But, Marty was used to that. _

_He ran through the door and banged on Ray's door. Ray opened up and saw Marty bloody and bruised. _

"_He beat you up again, didn't he?"_

_He didn't need an answer._

"_We need to talk Ray."_

"_Sure, come in, we'll talk and…"_

"_Not here."_

"_Okay. Where?"_

"_In the park, in 15."_

"_I'll be there."_

_Fifteen minutes later, Ray arrived at their usual spot in the park. Marty sat on the bench. He was shivering and his teeth rattled. Ray saw him crying, his hands were clenched in fists, his knuckles white. Ray could almost see the anger flaring through his nostrils and the invisible steaming coming off of his ears in waves, his look fixed on the horizon and distant. _

_Marty was full of rage and that was one man in life that Ray wouldn't want to cross if he was a bad guy._

"_Hey, you okay?"_

"_The bastard broke my arm."_

_Silence._

"_Do you still have contact with that kid form the gang?"_

"_Yes. Why?"_

"_I… I need a gun."_

"_Are you nuts? Marty, man you're smart. Don't go there."_

"_Like I said, I need a gun!"_

_Ray looked his friend Marty and saw expressionless face and steel blue eyes. And hatred. He gave up._

"_Okay. What kind of gun do you want?"_

"_I don't care. Just find me one. I have money. Here it is."_

_Marty gave Ray 500 dollars that he saved throughout the years. It was for his escape from home that he long planned, but now he changed his mind._

"_I'll be back in 30."_

"_Okay. I will wait for you."_

_Ray left and Marty stayed at the same spot. Never moved. He played scenarios in his head. How to kill Gordon John Brandel._

_Thirty minutes later Ray was back with a revolver. A .38 caliber. _

"_Here it is. Standard revolver, .38 caliber."_

_Marty checked the gun, aimed and put it under his blouse. _

"_Thanks Ray. I owe you big time."_

"_You owe me nothing Marty. Just don't do anything stupid, okay?"_

_Marty left without a word._

**(End of flashback)**

…

* * *

They arrived at the hospital.

"We're here Shaggy."

They all got out of the car and entered in the hospital. They found a doctor who took care of the wound. Deeks still hadn't said anything. He withdrew to himself and he wanted to be alone. To disappear from the face of Earth. After the doctor finished sewing the wound, he prescribed some pain meds. Sam took the prescription and all three of them got out of the hospital together.

Kensi waited outside. When Deeks saw her, he lowered his head. He couldn't look her in the eyes. Not after what he said to her in the rest room. He yelled at the person that he trusted the most in the world. The person he loved with his whole heart and soul. They finally had a chance to move their thing on and he was so close to ruin that. He would talk to her, but not now. Not when his head was confused. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He heard Kensi's voice. _Aw, snap. _

"I'll take it from here guys. You can go to OSP now."

"Okay. Make sure you buy these pain meds."

"I will. Bye guys."

"Bye."

"So, aren't you getting in the car?"

Deeks was finally able to look into Kensi's mismatched eyes. He saw understanding and forgiveness. She smiled.

"Come on."

Deeks got in the car.

For the most part of the drive Deeks was quiet. Kensi broke the silence.

"How are you holding up?"

"I'm better." (Pause) "Hey Kens, sorry about what I said to you earlier…"

"Shhh… Stop it. I'm not mad at you. I understand what you went through at that moment. As I've said, I'll be there with you all the way long."

"But, I yelled at you."

"You didn't. As far as I'm concerned Max yelled at me. Not Deeks."

"You really think that?"

"I don't think that. I know. I believe that you needed an exhaust pipe to throw out your emotions and you chose Max."

"I like when you talk in auto terms."

"You know me, I'm not a female."

"Come on Kensi, it was just a compliment. I didn't mean to offend you."

Kensi laughed hard and she couldn't stop.

"You are teasing me, aren't you?"

She continued to laugh.

"Sorry, your expression was funny."

"Apology accepted. Thanks Kens."

"Always."

…

* * *

_**(From Chapter 4)**_

"_We spoke on the phone and I arranged a meeting in half an hour."_

"_What's her name?"_

"_Here's the tricky part, Mr. Deeks. Her name is Hope Brandel."_

…

* * *

Her name hit Deeks like a brick thrown out of a passing car.

"Ms. Jones, please show Mr. Deeks the information you and Mr. Beale got on Ms. Brandel."

The folder containing the information about Hope showed up on the screen. Nell tapped the files one by one and opened them.

"She was born in 1985, in Bitola, that's a town located southwest in Macedonia. She is an only child. Here's some info about her. She finished secondary school in the High School of Economics. She graduated top out of her generation. She attended the Law School in Skopje and got a degree Juris Doctor (J. D.)."

_Just like me_, thought Deeks.

"She works for SVR (Sektor za vnatreshni raboti) Bitola that stands for Secretary of Internal Affairs. It's part of the net of more SVR's that are part of MVR (Ministerstvo za vnatreshni raboti), the Ministry of Internal Affairs. However, right after she graduated in 2008, she was hired by SVR Bitola and she has the title Inspector. She started following Tanevski's movements after she started working as an Inspector. She was hot on his trail when he flew to LA."

Eric took over.

"She came to LA on December 22nd of 2014. Three days before David Lucas was killed. She interviewed him on that same day. Do you want to see a picture of her Deeks?"

Deeks stared at the screen so long the room started spinning.

"No. I want to see her in person."

"Okay. No pic then. I'll send you the whole file."

"Mr. Deeks come with me downstairs, please."

Deeks followed Hetty in her office.

"Are you alright Mr. Deeks?"

"No. I'm not good. I feel awful."

"I know. When you sum up the events that happened these days, if I were you, I would've felt awful too."

Hetty looked at Deeks' eyes and saw pain written on his face.

"So, what's bothering you Mr. Deeks?"

"Lots of things."

"Why don't you tell me exactly what's bothering you?"

Deeks exhaled as the memories flew through his brain.

"Well, right now it bothers me this Hope Brandel. Her last name. Are we related somehow?"

"Yes."

That was the answer Deeks was dreading.

"She is your cousin."

"How did she end up in Macedonia?"

"Her father, your uncle Robert and your aunt Margaret flew down to Macedonia in 1977. Before you were born. He and his brother, your father had some issues and Robert thought it was better for him and his wife to leave the USA. The first few years it was difficult for them, a new country, you know the language barrier and all, but soon Robert found a job and so did Margaret. They welcomed their only child in 1985. They tried for 9 years before that, as I was told."

"What was the issue between him and my father, anyway?"

"Your father tried to… rape your aunt. Right after she married Robert."

"What?"

"Robert insisted your aunt to report the attack to the police, but she was afraid that Gordon will hurt her if she said something."

At that point Deeks realized that his father was bullying other people as well, not just him and his mother.

"So, that's why he left."

"Yes. He was scared too. He never told anyone where he was going. Your father didn't even care to look out for his brother."

"Well he didn't care for his kid either."

Hetty felt the irony in Deeks' voice, but she was glad that he finally opened up about his past.

"You want to talk about your past Mr. Deeks?"

"I'm not sure."

"Well (she looked at her watch) we have about 20 minutes and 7 seconds before Ms. Brandel is here. I'm all ears."

"I was thinking about my past lately. To be honest, when you presented this case to us it was like every damn thing I wanted to forget was back."

"I know that it must've been difficult for you to find out that the person that was your friend wasn't your friend at all."

"Yes. It's hard. When I think of that, the only logical excuse that David had was that he was forced by Ruiz to come close to me. Maybe he suspected me and wanted to know why I showed up then, when the main exchange was about to happen."

"You shouldn't try to excuse Mr. Lucas' actions Mr. Deeks. He did what he did, and it's none of your business to look for a reason why he betrayed you."

"I guess you're right Hetty."

"Yes, I am Mr. Deeks. But, my primarily question was about the past. The one involving Gordon John Brandel."

"Well, I've been thinking about that too. In fact, I have nightmares."

"Nightmares?"

"Yes. In them, he always manages to catch me and he swings the shotgun around my head. Then he aims at my head and boom, I'm awake."

"You should talk to Nate, Mr. Deeks."

"Yeah, I should probably do that. But, not now."

"Good. What else?"

"This case triggered memories from my childhood. I remembered my 6th birthday. I remembered my mother when she told me that she's sorry to have me as a son. I remember when I shot my dad at 11. Lots of things. Actually my brain is a mush. With all the information and the case and everything, I feel confused."

"Believe me, Mr. Deeks, I know the feeling. And about your mother, you never told me anything about her."

"That's because I tried to lock my past down. And I don't know what to tell you about her. She hated me. So did Gordon."

"You said she blamed you for what your father did to her."

"Yes. She always was telling me how happy she was with my father until I was born. I don't blame her. She must've been fooled by his kindness. Or she wanted to believe she was happy with him."

"However, you shouldn't use that as your guide in life Mr. Deeks. Your guide should be the positive thought and the hope for a better tomorrow."

"Yeah."

"And remember Mr. Deeks that we are brought to this world with a mission."

"I know."

"Ours is to save lives. But we shouldn't forget to be happy and to find our significant other."

Deeks could see where the conversation was going.

"Hetty…"

"What Mr. Deeks?"

Hetty had a big smile on her face.

"I just want to know, same as your colleagues."

"It's nothing official. We're still hanging around. We haven't spoken on that matter with Kensi. You know with the case and everything there's no time. We're busy all the time."

"Listen, Mr. Deeks. Consider this as a tempered suggestion. You and Ms. Blye should discuss your banter, partnership, relationship, or whatever it is you have you two. One never knows where they will wind up tomorrow, or if they will survive the day. I suggest as soon as the case is over, you should do that. And you two will go on vacation after all this chaos is over. You'll tell me how it went when you come back from it."

"Okay."

Deeks relaxed a little and smiled. It was the first time for Hetty to conduct a conversation like this with him, but it felt good.

"And now, we get to the main topic of our conversation Mr. Deeks. Your cousin Hope."

"As you've had chance to see, Nell and Eric gave me the basics in OSP. She is an outstanding Inspector for the Ministry of Internal Affairs, actually SVR Bitola. SVR stands for Secretary of Internal Affairs. She is the best in her field."

"Just like you. I guess the cop thing is in your family, Mr. Deeks."

"A compliment from Hetty. Hooray!"

"I think you deserve a little cheer up Mr. Deeks. Oh, we have 57 seconds till Ms. Brandel is here."

Before Hetty finished her sentence, Hope showed up.

She wore navy blue jeans, a light peach-colored blouse with print of a black cat and BLACK written above the cat's head. She wore a pink leather jacket. She had a black bag strapped across her shoulder. And she wore comfy black shoes. She had on a pink lipstick and a touch of mascara. She had pink pearly earrings. Maybe she wasn't the person that put on a lot of make-up, but she loved jewelry. She wore glasses that gave her a nerdy look. She had brown hair, but it changed colors from time to time, so it never was a definitive brown color. It changed to black when it was rainy, and to lighter brown when it was sunny, sometimes even to orange and a little red at the edges. She had brown eyes that she inherited from her mother. She was left handed. And she was smart. Just like Marty.

"Someone called me?"

"Just on time Ms. Brandel. Let me introduce you to our liaison officer, LAPD detective Marty Deeks."

"Nice to meet you detective Deeks. I'm Inspector Hope Brandel from the Macedonian Police Department."

Deeks shook her hand, surprised how warm her touch was.

"Nice to meet you too Hope."

"May I call you Marty?"

"Yes, it's okay."

"Ms. Lange you said your team has four team members. Where are the other three operatives?"

"They are upstairs, in the Operations Center."

Hope started to leave, but Hetty spoke up first.

"Just a second, Ms. Brandel. I need to talk to you on personal matters."

"Personal matters?"

"Yes. Well… Um, I don't know how to say this, but… You and Mr. Deeks are cousins."

"Cousins? How's that?"

"I'll leave you two to talk about that. For that time I'll check the others."

Hope and Deeks exchanged looks and sat across one another. For a moment neither of them spoke. Hope broke the silence.

"I'm in USA for two weeks and the first thing I find out is that the man I chased from Macedonia all over to LA is a part of a federal investigation. Second, that I have a cousin in LA. Isn't that terrific for my first travel abroad?"

"Indeed."

"So, how come you and me to be cousins?"

"Your father and my father were brothers."

"Ah, yeah. I remember. My father once talked about his brother, but he never mentioned who he was or where he lived. Just that he was an asshole."

"You have no idea. You wouldn't have wanted to know him."

She heard a personal statement in the way Deeks talked about his father. The way he was holding his hands, twisting them and trying to place the watch on the right posture and the way he lowered his head avoiding to look her in the eyes, told her he was abused while he was just a kid.

"He beat you?"

Deeks was surprised by the girl's observation and the fact that she was in the room less than 10 minutes and she cracked the enigma he was holding to himself for more than 2 decades.

"How did you know…?"

"Your body language. Believe me, I've seen a lot of cases where child abusing was involved and they all had the same body language. So, my uncle is really an asshole, huh?"

"He was. He died in 1998."

"Oh. Such a shame I hadn't laid my hands on him."

Deeks smiled.

"What? I hate child abusers Marty. How could someone destroy a child's life with no reason at all?"

"I like you Hope."

"I like you too, Marty. Btw, I'm a sucker for blondes with blue eyes."

"Are you flirting with your cousin?"

"Nope. I'm just laying my cards on the table. You have someone in your life?"

Deeks wanted to ask her how she knew that fact, but gave up.

"Yes, her name is Kensi."

"I like her already."

"Wait until you meet her."

"She works here?"

"Yes. She is NCIS Special Agent Kensi Blye."

"She must be very 'special'."

"Yes. She is very special to me. You sound just like her."

"Oh, thank you. It's good to know that I am special too."

For a moment Deeks and Hope just sat and said nothing. Deeks had this huge grin on his face that was indicating he was happy. He knew Hope barely an hour, and he felt like they've known each other for years.

"You remind me of a friend I had in high school. He was just like you. Blonde, with blue eyes and was smiling all day long. Positive, happy go lucky, joker, smart, pretty, you name it."

"What happened to him? You talk about him in past tense."

"He died. Hit and run."

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have to. I got over it. It was a long time ago."

"Tell me something about your work as an Inspector."

"There's nothing to tell. Just an ordinary work. Few big cases over the years, but for our standards. Those are cases that you guys would solve it in a matter of hours."

"Don't underestimate your law enforcement agency Hope. Maybe you don't have all the resources we have, but you are efficient in your field. I'm sure about that."

"Well, if you say so…"

"How about we go upstairs and we start working on the case, so we have more time to talk when all of this is over?"

"You mean the chaos that Tanevski created?"

"Yes. He orchestrated a very well operation with the weapons and now we're here to gather the bread crumbs. That's the easy part. The hard part is to put up the whole case. There are still some aspects of the case that are shady."

"Maybe I'll be able to help you guys."

"I hope so."

"You know what they say, the hope dies last."

"So I've heard."

Hope and Deeks climbed the stairs and entered in the Operations Center. Hetty smiled as she saw Deeks and his cousin Hope get in together. She was happy that Deeks was finally smiling again.

"Everyone, this is Ms. Brandel, the Inspector from the Macedonian Police Department that will help us with our investigation. As you know, she is a cousin of Mr. Deeks."

"Nice to meet you Hope. I'm Sam Hanna."

"G. Callen."

"Eric Beale."

"Nell Jones."

"And you are Kensi, I suppose." Said Hope as she shook the hand of the woman with mismatched eyes, that had a mark on her right eyes named Nevus of Ota. Very few people had it. "Very Special Agent Kensi Blye."

"Deeks!"

"What? I just said that you were special. I didn't lie."

Kensi spoke in low voice at all saying "I'm going to kill you". But, Deeks was poor at reading lips, so he didn't catch up what she said.

"What did you just said?"

"She said that she is going to kill you."

"How'd you…"

"I've volunteered a little in the Center for Deaf and Mute persons and I learned the technique 'cause it was required."

"She is surprisingly talented Kens."

"Ahm. Ladies and gentlemen, we have work to do."

"Yes Hetty. Pulling the files now."

"How much did you know on Kristijan Tanevski's life Hope?" Callen asked.

"I know almost everything about his life in Macedonia, but nothing about his life in the States. Like you can see in my personal file, I started working in SVR Bitola after Tanevski cut his ties to LA in 2006. But, I strongly suspect that he still has contacts here. The only one that I found was David Lucas and he is dead. When I talked to him he said something about some Max guy, but I couldn't connect the dots. I figured you can help me with that. Do you know who he is?"

All of them looked at each other.

"You're looking right at him."

Hope looked Deeks and saw the darker side of that loving character. She felt shivers through her spine.

"Oh, I get it. It's an alias, right?"

"Right."

Hope could see that Deeks' mood changed in a matter of seconds and she realized that Max Gentry was more than an alias. He represented a shield and escape from the reality. That was due to ruined childhood, her best guess was. He had a troubled past and needed someone who can understand his demons. In that process Max Gentry was created. It wasn't far from the true answer, but it wasn't too close either.

_Just from one look. Hope, you surprised yourself._

"Why do you say that David was in contact with Tanevski?"

"Because it popped up my investigation. Tanevski and Lucas communicated several times over the years. Every time after the conversation was ended, they ditched their cell phones so they cannot be traced. Tanevski, however made one big mistake. He used the same phone twice in December 2014. The first time it was to talk to David, outgoing call. And the second time it was incoming call, from a certain General Mike Novack, at Camp Pendleton. That was December 22nd, the day I got here and talked to David. Three days later he was dead. Killed. It was like someone wanted him to shut his trap and don't say a word about what he knew."

"Maybe General Novack tipped Tanevski off about your visit to Camp Pendleton Kensi." Said Callen.

"That was my guess, too. I knew that he was holding something back."

"Kensi, you talked to him?"

"Yes."

"So, now he knows that the NCIS is investigating the murder."

"Yes."

"You never told me you talked to David's supervisor Kens."

"I was going to tell you, but we weren't sure of his connection to David's death."

"We?"

The moment Kensi realized that she said "we" she regretted it. She wished she kept her mouth shut, but it was too late.

"Yes. I, Callen and Sam were establishing a theory regarding David's murder."

"You knew that David lied to me before I even had a chance to find out?"

"Yes Deeks. But, we did it so we could protect you. Come on Deeks, you know better."

She referred to his lash out in the rest room.

"Yes, I know. Either way, you should've told me." Deeks blew out a breath. "However, let's hear what Hope has on Kristijan Tanevski."

Change of subject. Just like that.

Hope took out a USB drive out of her pocket and gave it to Eric. The only problem was that the documents were on Macedonian. Callen started reading the files and Hope was surprised when he spoke up.

"He was born in Bitola, Macedonia in 1960, to be exact 16th of January. He went to elementary school, but no records of high school or faculty. He is involved in weapons trafficking since he served in the military. In that time serving was mandatory. Never married, no significant relationships. In 2005 he arrived to LA on a work visa. He worked with Ruiz under the assumed identity of Michael Leland. Few days after the operation went down following the arrest performed by the LAPD, he came back home to Macedonia. He led his business on a low level. He worked as a janitor in the buildings that are part from the REMO complex in Bitola, so no one will suspect. He received a phone call from General Novack in December 2014, who gave him information about David. He comes to LA and kills David. He used the American identity when he rented his car, green Ford Taurus. The car has GPS and it currently says that the car is on North Sierra Bonita Avenue. The address where he lived 8 years ago. The address in Bitola is on Jadranska Street. As we all know, he worked in Fed Ex back in 2006. This pretty much sums up what we know about Tanevski."

Hope took over.

"Here are some photos that were taken in Macedonia… and those there are taken here in LA. December 2014. By me."

"What the hell?"

"I'm an investigator Marty. I investigate." She winked.

"Wow, with this information plus the evidence that we will gather undercover, Tanevski will spend the rest of his life in jail. On multiple charges. The first and foremost arms dealing."

"Oh, you went to Law School."

"Yes, I did."

"Nice. I did too."

Hope and Deeks looked at each other and they spoke at the same time.

"It's in our blood."

For a minute or two there were no worries at all in the world.

"Just for the record Callen where did you learn Macedonian?"

"I didn't. But I know Russian. That helped me a lot."

"I see. Well, I never figured the Russian language out, but I'll try in future. Maybe I can use your skills, Chief."

"Why now? But, I cannot promise to be a patient teacher. I am not a patient agent either."

"You'll learn patience with time Monsieur."

"Ms. Brandel are you ready for a break?"

"Why?"

"I want to talk to you. And I have a cranberry tea that just arrived this morning."

"That would be great. Thanks Ms. Lange."

"Hetty. Ms. Lange makes me feel old."

"Done deal. Hey guys, do you have some plans for tonight?"

"No." They all answered in unison.

"Well, if you don't have much work today, I'd love to go out with you on a dinner."

"That would be great." Sam said.

They all had approving looks on their faces.

"Okay, see you in 20 hours sharp. Come on Hetty."

Hetty and Hope left the Operations Center.

"She is amazing." Said Sam.

"Yup. She knows how to read lips." Said Kensi.

"And knows everything about body language." Said Deeks.

"I surprised her with the knowledge of the Macedonian language." Said Callen.

"And she made Hetty smile." Said Nell.

"Which reminds me that you owe me Oreos Nell." Said Eric.

"You ate one bowl of Oreos while the team was at the Marina."

"That doesn't count."

They all chuckled at that.

…

* * *

**-In Hetty's Office-**

"How do you like Los Angeles, Ms. Brandel?"

"It's beautiful. I could live here forever and now that I found my cousin… I may consider that opportunity."

"You should do that. I spoke with your supervisor and he told me that you are the one of the best people he had in his task force."

"He did?"

"Yes."

"Strange. I had a feeling that he never really thought good of me."

Hetty watched Hope for a second before she asked her next question.

"I noticed that you are quite observant Hope. So, what can you tell me about Mr. Deeks?"

"You want me to profile my cousin? The one that I just met?"

"Yes. The one with the dark blonde hair and the big blue eyes. The one that can make you laugh even when you're on the verge of tears."

"What do you want me to say?"

"You are the newest here. You know him less than 2 hours. The ones that work here know him 4 years. If I ask them they'll tell me that Mr. Deeks is ready to go undercover as Max Gentry, but I'm not so sure."

"And what makes you think that I'll give you the answer you are looking for Hetty?"

"I know that Hope. Because, as I've said you are a great observer."

"Do I have to answer right now, or I have time to decide?"

"You have 24 hours. After that, I need a report. You may go now."

Hope left Hetty's office with a strange feeling. She barely knew Marty Deeks and Hetty asked her for an opinion. One hell of a start of her career with the NCIS.

Hetty already planned everything, so Hope could join the elite task force. She was special just like all of the others.

_She would make a great asset of this team_, thought Hetty as she drank the last of her cranberry tea.

…


	6. The Meeting

**Chapter 6 - The Meeting**

* * *

After Hope left the Spanish Mission, Hetty opened her laptop and typed the words "Christine" and "Deeks" on the web browser. The result was a woman in her late fifties and early sixties with long dark blonde hair and ocean blue eyes. She was smiling and she was happy. She remarried after her husband's death, but she kept her maiden name. She lived at the same house that was one part of the horrific past of Marty Deeks.

Hetty scribbled her address on the pad and left the Mission.

She parked the Jaguar in front of the house and looked at the surroundings. The patio was well nurtured and you could see that she loved flowers. Hetty knocked on the door. A minute or two passed before someone opened the door. And then, Christine Deeks showed up. She wore white apron over her pink shirt and jeans. Her hair bas bound in ponytail and she had dangling earrings on her ears.

"Hello, is this the home of Christine Deeks?"

"Yes. That would be me. And you are…?"

"My name is Henrietta Lange. Can I get in?"

"Why? What's this about?"

"It's about your son."

Christine stepped back and opened the door fully, so Hetty could get in.

"How did you find me? I tried to lay low as much as I could."

"If you knew who I was then you also would've known that I know everything about my team."

"Your team?"

"Yes. I'm the Operations Manager of the Office of Special Projects, Naval Criminal Investigative Service branch in Los Angeles."

"My son is an agent?"

"Well, not exactly. He's an LAPD detective that works as our liaison officer. But, he's a competent officer of the law that is good at what he does as any other agent on my team. Listen Christine, I'm here because of his past."

Christine lowered her head and the memories from the life she once shared with Gordon Brandel flashed in front of her eyes. She fought hard the tears that threatened to leave her eyes.

"What about that?"

"Mr. Deeks once told me that you said you hated him as your husband did. That you were sorry to have him as a son."

"Yes, I said that."

"I want to know why Christine? Why did you that to your only son that wanted your help and support?"

"Because I wanted to keep him on a distance. If he was close to me or if Gordon smelled that he was momma's boy he would've killed him. I couldn't let that happen."

"I have all the time in the world Christine. You can tell me everything."

Christine fought the tears that stung her eyes.

"You know how I met Gordon?"

It was a rhetorical question.

"I was out with my friends. My father was easy on me when it came to going outs and making friends. He didn't care much. So, one night I just sat at a bar, dim lights, I ordered a drink. Suddenly, I felt someone coming close to me. It was Gordon. He had this huge grin and beautiful green eyes that made me drop my mouth to the floor. I don't remember much about the rest of the night, but I know that we started dating.

"First it was hugs, holding hands, kisses on the cheek, that kind of stuff. After two months he kissed me for real. And then I knew that my life would be nothing, if Gordon wasn't in it. I guess I was fooled."

Hetty didn't say anything.

"The first few years of our life like married couple were perfect. He knew how to be romantic, to bring me flowers, and take me to the movies, a trip or two to his homeland, Florida. After I got pregnant with Marty he changed. At first he didn't like the fact that I would gain weight in a matter of months. Then the baby. It must be a boy, he would be like me, blah, blah, blah. About the name he went crazy when I said that it would be Martin, after my father. That was the first time he hit me. After that, it became a routine to slap me around."

"Why didn't you leave him?"

"Where would have I gone Ms. Lange, huh? My parents were dead, my friends who knew where they were. I was alone."

Hetty looked Christine with the big eyes of hers. She saw pain and despair written on the face of the woman that endured too much in her life.

"Go on."

"The day Marty was born, Gordon started drinking big time. He said it was to celebrate the labor of his son, but after Marty was born it was regular. And he would hit me till I lost consciousness. I was glad that Marty was a baby and couldn't understand what his dad was doing to his mom. Everything changed when Marty turned 6. He started beating Marty, too. For no reason at all. The first time it was because he defended me when he saw Gordon beat me."

"And then you decided that you should push your son away."

"Yes. It was because he would've killed Marty if he saw him near me. That's why I said what I said. I never meant it. Marty was the only thing that got out of that marriage that wasn't evil. He was the sweetest little boy with the blue eyes and his blonde hair. I loved him more than my life and I would never ever let Gordon kill him because of me. I still love my son Ms. Lange. With all of my heart and soul."

Hetty knew that Christine meant what she said and that the only goal in her life was to protect her son.

"He thinks that you were blinded by Gordon's kindness."

"He is right, Ms. Lange. I was blinded. But, after Marty shot Gordon, I was convinced that Gordon was a monster. He knew how to be kind, loving, caring. It was all an act. I know that now. He was the king of deceit."

"What would you tell Martin if you had a chance to see him again Christine?"

"That I love him. That I would do everything for him. I'd probably try to compensate the time spent away from him. And to re-establish my bond with him."

"I see. Thank you for your time Christine. And you can call me Hetty."

Hetty started leaving the house when Christine spoke up.

"Nice to meet you Hetty. How's my son?"

"He is good. We're in the middle of an operation, so he is kinda busy. I'll make sure as soon as the operation is over, for him to talk to you."

"I'll appreciate that Hetty."

"I better get going now."

Hetty left a picture of Deeks on the table in the living room and left. Christine closed the door after her.

…

* * *

They went to "Il Fornaio" restaurant that was located on 301 North Beverly Drive in Beverly Hills. It was an Italian restaurant and since they all loved Italian food, it was a great choice. It had the traditional Italian dishes and it was located in BH, which was maybe the most famous part from LA (besides Hollywood). Hope made the reservations for 7 people, because she wanted to meet Joelle Taylor and Michelle Hanna. They ordered appetizer, which was Bruschetta Calda. They all ordered pizza Capricciosa as the main dish. They took red wine. While they waited the pizza to come, they engaged themselves in a conversation about the days spent in NCIS, about holidays etc.

"Do you remember the Christmas we spent on that Navy ship, guys?" Callen asked.

"Yes, I do remember that." said Kensi "When this big guy here (she showed at Sam) pulled Hetty up, happy that he'll go home and we were stuck 4 days on that boat. Do you know how long those 4 days were? I was supposed to spend Christmas with my mom."

"Sorry, Kensi. That's how we SEALs do. Friends with benefits." Sam chuckled. "Anyway, do you remember Shaggy here that followed the lead on the spinach and found our murder weapon and our killer?"

"Yes, I remember that Sam. When the bad guy actually wanted to smuggle me out of the ship in the container. Ugh. And don't forget that I had plans for Christmas too. (He looked at Kensi). We had plans for Christmas. Me, Kensi and Julia. We were supposed to go on vacation together, ya' know, snow, cabin, fire place…"

Deeks looked at Kensi with his blue eyes, longing for the romantic moment that never happened. But, now they had all the time in the world to compensate for all the time that was lost in the past.

"So, what do you do Joelle?" Asked Hope.

"I teach at a kindergarten."

"Nice. You must be crowded with children all day long."

"Yes, it's comforting. To watch over them. To teach them important stuff. To help them. I love children."

"So do I. I'd love to have twins one day."

"You married?"

"I was once. But something happened and… Let's talk about something else." Hope said, clearly upset.

"Okay. How about that time when we made the ruse with LAPD? To look like Deeks is going back to LAPD and quitting NCIS unwillingly." Said Callen.

"That was one hell of a mission." Said Sam.

"They didn't even tell me Hope."

"Really?"

"Really. I was there and I saw Deeks shoot at the man he thought was pulling a gun and for a moment I thought I was losing my partner."

"That was the hardest thing Kens. To lie to you. But, it was necessary."

"It takes courage to do that, but for one to achieve the goal sometimes they should deceive and lie."

"You're right about that one Hope. But, at that moment I wanted to kill everybody. Deeks, Hetty, Lt. Bates. Everybody literally."

"Do you know what Lt. Bates told me about you Kens?"

"No."

"He said that you're the one woman in the world that he doesn't want to cross in life. I think you scared the hell out of him."

Kensi kicked his leg under the table.

"Ouch! That hurt."

"Then, you better shut your mouth up before you see me in that mood again."

The pizza arrived. They ate in silence. Several times during the dinner together someone would say something and they all would laugh.

"I heard that you are a CIA agent Michelle." Hope said.

"Yes."

"Sounds like fun to have a husband that works for the NCIS. It must have something to do with the abbreviations, right?"

"Hahaha. You can have him whenever you like it." Michelle said.

That made everyone to laugh.

"Oh, no, no, no. I'll leave him to you. (Pause) Nice to meet you Michelle. And you Joelle. You ladies rock. We should go out another time. Just ladies."

"Yeah, we probably should." Said Kensi.

They ordered a dessert. They ate the dessert, drank wine, joked a little bit more, and when the clock showed 10 p.m. they had to leave the restaurant, because it was closing time.

"The time had come for us to say goodbye." Said Callen.

"But not for long G. On Monday morning we are back to business." Said Sam.

"Tell me about it." Said Michelle. "That means we have the weekend just for us. I already made plans."

"Mhm. Come on Hope, you are coming with me. You're done with hotels in downtown LA." Said Deeks.

"I'll go to my mom's tonight. Have a great weekend guys." Said Kensi.

"You too Kens." Said Callen. "Come on Joelle."

Callen and Joelle left in the black Mercedes S550. Sam and Michelle left with the Challenger and Deeks, Hope and Kensi left with Deeks' red Chevy Malibu.

Deeks dropped Kensi to her mother's house. He and Hope entered his home when a dog bark welcomed them.

"You have a dog?"

"Yup."

Monty showed up, swinging with his tail, excited to see his owner.

"What's your name, mutt?"

"His name is Monty. He is a retired police dog. He was sniffing bombs back in the day."

"Nice to meet you Monty."

The dog barked in approval.

"Do you want some coffee Hope?"

"Probably not."

She petted Monty for a few moments, and then she joined Deeks in the living room.

"I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Let me guess. It's about the case. Because everyone I know wants to talk to me about the case."

"Nope. It's not about the case. It's about the time you were tortured by Sidorov."

"How did you…?"

"I read the file. All of the files on the missions you took part of. I read fast. This one caught my attention. And before you ask, no, I did not breach security, I was authorized by Hetty to read the important facts about your work on the NCIS missions. No detail other than the necessary, because still the missions are classified and it's not my business to get involved in that, but for the sake of this mission, and to know you better. For the sake of this case."

"I don't want to talk about that."

"Okay. I shouldn't have asked."

She could see that her question made Deeks uncomfortable.

"Hey, Marty I'm sorry okay? I know that I just jumped in your life and I don't have the right to question you…"

"It's not you Hope. It's me. I don't want to talk about that because when I do, it's like everything is back. Like it never ended. I still jump up when I hear a drill go on… For a moment I thought of quitting the force. I felt helpless. I still do sometimes."

Hope thought, _who doesn't_?

Deeks lowered his head. He absentmindedly touched his watch trying to adjust it on his wrist although it was on its place. He realized that the last time he talked to someone about his torture, it was Nate on the other side.

"That came out of nowhere Hope. I mean, I knew what torture was. I have read it in the books and I've seen it in movies, but in practice, in real life… I wasn't prepared for such a horrible thing. I wish I could erase that part of my life."

Hope was surprised when she heard Deeks actually open up about what happened a year ago.

"I'm glad that son of a bitch is dead, Marty. 'Cause if he wasn't, I would've killed him myself."

"I'm glad too. But, that doesn't make me feel better. He is in my memory. When I close my eyes at night he is here. Same goes to when I open up my eyes at the morning. Combine that with the nightmares I have lately and you'll get Vampire Deeks."

Hope smiled. It was good to know that Deeks handled the PTSD well, but he still had the fear that Sidorov will come back with the drill and finish the job. She saw the photos, Nate's evaluation, and the report on the mission. It took Deeks months before he regained his composure again. If this operation went south somehow giving the circumstances, she didn't want to know the conclusion of that. But, after the time she spent with her cousin, Hope was certain that he was ready to finish this operation and close the gap from 8 years ago once and for all.

"I'm sure that I want some Vampire Deeks for my birthday though."

Deeks chuckled.

…

* * *

"_**Body language refers to various forms of nonverbal communication where a person may reveal clues as to some unspoken intention or feeling through the physical behavior. These behaviors include (but are not limited to) facial expressions, body posture, gestures, eye movement, touch and the use of space."**_

Hope visited Hetty in one of her houses the very next morning. She was sure in the evaluation of her cousin as much as she was when interrogating suspects in Macedonia. She couldn't wait for 24 hours. She knew that Deeks was ready to play the game after the conversation she had with him last night.

"Good morning Ms. Brandel."

"Good morning Hetty. How've you been?"

"Fine. You?"

"I still have a headache after last night's dinner, but I'm okay."

"Too much red wine, huh?"

"Mhm."

"I suppose you are here to give me your opinion on Mr. Deeks."

"Yes. I'm ready to give you every information regarding Marty's capability to do the job."

"Shoot."

"First, I want you to know that he is ready to go as Max Gentry. He is determined of doing so. I had a chance to talk to him about the past and the present. Plus, I read the files on Marty and his undercover work, and I can give you a parallel opinion on the two characters."

"Very good."

"I'll start with Max. Max Gentry in cruel, cold-blooded and mean son of a bitch. He is rough and tough. He knows how to play with all kinds of criminals. He is sneaky and could make your blood freeze. He never did something bad as to kill someone on purpose, but he sure intimidated a lot of people in the making of a good undercover operation. He is smart and calculated and he'll never take orders from anyone, other than himself. He is dark, I mean he has a dark side and he's not afraid of showing that. He can be mad and angry and raged, but he would never lose his temper. That makes him lethal and dangerous.

"Clearly, Max as a character is unhappy and bitter. He never found a place where he truly belonged. And that's what makes him even scarier for the people who know him. And he is proud of himself. Never regrets anything he's done. He stands up for himself and for his friends. He loves leather jackets, just like me. And he loves to ride a motorcycle. I would say that he is, in a way, an outlaw biker. I wouldn't cross paths with him, if I was to be a bad guy. Max is a character that Deeks plays well Hetty. He is a character with a name and face, but I think that sometimes Max represents escape and shield for Deeks. When he wants a break from his everyday life."

Hetty had made fresh lemonade just before Hope showed up. Hope took a sip before she continued further. The lemonade wet Hope's dry throat.

"On the contrary, Deeks is the smartest and funniest person in the world. He is so happy about his life and the chance that the life gave him after a horrible childhood. He's soft, warm. He knows how to make you smile even when you want to cry. He has great sense of humor. He is sweet and can be a hopeless romantic. He is genuine. He is charming, lovable, goofy character, and kind. When he wants to do something he is determined as hell. He is a light-hearted person. When it comes to friends and work he is very loyal. He trusts easily to other people, even after all of the fake friends he had throughout the years. He is like that. I wouldn't call him naïve, but he is slightly. And he is one hell of an undercover operative. That's one of the many specialties Deeks has."

Hope stopped for a second.

"What is it Ms. Brandel?"

"There's a side of Deeks' character that is a little bit of I don't know how to say it. Tricky maybe?"

"Tricky?"

"Let me explain it to you. When he's faced with extreme situations, sometimes he lashes out; he lets the emotions take the lead. In cases when it hits close to home. His self-doubt is prominent when it comes to high stake cases. And when he is faced with the demons from his past, he lacks of self-confidence. Sometimes he's not even aware of that. As I said the loyalty is one of his strengths. But, also it could be one of his flaws. 'Cause of the loyalty, he goes too far when it comes to the person to whom he is loyal. And he can be dangerous to the people and to himself. He is a mystery man. You can't just step into his world and expect that he will tell you everything about him, or that he'll let you in his life easily." (Pause) "Hetty, tell me, do you know the basics of body language?"

"Of course I do."

"Then you know that when you keep your arms crossed, that's a sign that you want to distance yourself from the others. But, it also means that you lack confidence and you're insecure. You feel like the others are going to steal your thoughts. And I noticed how he wrings his hands and tries to adjust his wrist watch. Maybe he is not even aware that he does that, but that might be a problem when he actually faces the memories. He is doing that a lot."

Hope sighed.

"You know Hetty, combine the posture of the arms with the movements of the head and you can read him fully. I don't know about you, but I got the impression that when he is cornered with questions that touch some delicate theme that's somehow related to him, he either changes the subject or he lowers his head. That means a lot of things, which one will suit Deeks' personality I can't tell. It may be shame, guilt, who knows."

For a moment Hope looked into the bright blue water. She listened the waves crashing into one another and closed her eyes.

"Sometimes you amaze yourself with how much you can learn about a person when you read their body language and hear their words. Hell, one look in the eyes it could tell a lot about a person."

"Eyes are the mirrors to the soul."

"Indeed. So, let me finish my layout. When you look aside it means the person is either nervous, or distracted. And if you look down at the floor it means the person is shy, upset, and timid, you name it. In Deeks' case you can tell that he lacks of communication skills. Don't get me wrong, he's great when you talk to him. Then, when he gets to say what he really thinks, what he really means, then he has his difficulties. The thing is, he is reserved and keeps distance. As soon as the other person makes the move he closes immediately. Once he is relaxed, he could jabber with hours."

"I've witnessed that more than once Hope."

"That only means that he is emotionally scarred Hetty. He was hurt many times in life and he experienced pain in many forms. The fact is, he is as vulnerable as any of us is, but he learned the hard way. He learned how to adapt to the challenges that life gives. What he endured both as a child and as an officer of the law, made him very brave and strong. He is a survivor Hetty, and he learned how to survive storm in harsh conditions."

Hope downed her glass of lemonade.

"And, the last thing that makes Deeks Deeks is his smile. This huge grin he always has on his face. It's also his defense mechanism. Everything is easier when you smile. Someone once told me that the saddest people has the most sincere smile of all."

"That one was right Hope."

"In my personal opinion Deeks is a real goofball. And he is a surfer, which means he has a way how to get all of his frustration out. And I like the thing that he was a lawyer once. He is one hell of a cop, though. He would make a great NCIS agent one day. He can stand up for himself. He showed that in many occasions. When he shot his father, when he didn't reveal Michelle's identity to Sidorov…"

"You talked to Mr. Deeks about the time he was tortured by Sidorov?"

"Briefly. I was able to read the file on the mission and Nate's report. All I can say about that is that his character is bulletproof. Well kept and nurtured, and he lets very few people to see who he is really, really. And what happens in his head. I think that his ability to escape from the reality was the clue at how he survived his ordeal. That's what kept him alive. It wasn't easy, but he managed to stay sane and not go crazy, which means he wants to fight his demons. And he is not afraid of doing that. He just needs someone that can make him open up about what he really feels and what he has inside. Most important thing of all, though, is that he doesn't talk easily about that day."

"That's why I was surprised to hear that he talked to you about it. I thought that the only person that he talked was his partner."

"Kensi."

"Yes, you are correct. Ms. Blye is the only person that he would open up to. I think that it took them long enough to figure out that they love each other, and to learn how to communicate. She used to say to him that he has poor communication skills. But, somehow they both learned their lesson, and now more than ever they are willing to help each other. After Ms. Blye went through not long after Mr. Deeks… Let's just say that it was a roller coaster for all of us. They are the one of the toughest people that I've worked with in my whole life, Ms. Brandel."

"Exactly. He loves her. She loves him. But, she knows about him the things that everyone knows. He is afraid to let her in his darkest places. He is afraid that Kensi would leave him, but what he really needs is help and support. He needs understanding, not judgment. He needs assurance that he has someone by his side that will love him just like he is. I think that he has found all of that in Kensi, but something is still missing. When they finally find that missing piece of the puzzle, Marty can leave his troubled past behind and move on. Because he is a child that never got a chance to grow up. I think that you are right. Only together they can fight whatever is what's served in front of them. Here. That's my "evaluation" on Marty, Hetty."

"That's a good observation Hope for someone that knows Mr. Deeks less than a day."

"De vez en cuando debes de saber dónde buscar Hetty."

Hetty smiled.

"More lemonade?"

"Oh, yeah. I definitely need something, 'cause I feel like I've spent the last few hours in the Mohave Desert."

Hetty took the pitcher and poured Hope another glass of lemonade. She thought about her earlier decision that Hope should join the NCIS. Now, she was certain. She was extraordinary in her field of work and she could definitely help her team.

The truth was that her supervisor in the police department where Hope worked didn't like Hope at all. He always thought that Hope's techniques were little too modern for their standard. He was old-fashioned guy, a narcissist that thought he was the best. Hetty was ready to show him that he was dead wrong. She planned on making a phone call later that day and letting him know that Hope will start to work for her immediately. Maybe even threatening him, making him cook for a while and then take away the only good thing he had in that police station, a rare pearl like Ms. Brandel.

"He is a great team player Hetty."

"Yes, I know that. But, for this one mission I was worried that he may have difficulties."

"He definitely has, but he is ready to roll whenever the actual thing is going to happen."

"Good to hear that Hope. Oh, isn't it peaceful here?"

"Indeed."

…


	7. Unfinished Business

**Chapter 7 - Unfinished Business**

* * *

**-January 19****th****-**

It took Leland one week to call back. He said that he'll meet Ruiz in his office in MDR just after 10 o'clock. Ruiz sat in his office in Marina Del Rey and waited for Leland to show up. He wanted to cut the deal with Max and finish the job from 8 years ago.

Michael Leland pulled his brand new Audi R8 GT Spyder in front of Ruiz's office. He wore an expensive Armani suit and Rey Ban sun glasses. If someone saw him at that moment, they would think of him as a high class businessman and not an arms dealer. But, everything goes to the external appearance.

"Michael."

"Marcos."

They shook hands.

"What's this about Marcos? Why did you call me after all these years?"

"It wasn't my call." Ruiz sighed. "Look, one week ago Max Gentry came to me. You remember him?"

"Of course I do."

"Well, Max says that he has a buyer for the case with weapons that went missing 8 years ago. And I thought you had them weapons, so I called you."

"You thought right, amigo. After the raid 8 years ago, I came back and took the weapons. But, I'm afraid that they're no longer in my possession. I sold them to a guy in Florida. But, if your friend Max wants to buy weapons that badly, why don't you make an offer that he wouldn't refuse?"

"What do you mean?"

"Let me show you something Marcos."

Michael Leland took Ruiz's laptop and plugged a USB drive in it. He opened the folder that contained photos of Deeks and the NCIS team.

"Look."

Ruiz inspected the amount of photos in the folder and its dates, info and more. And to say that he was surprised, it was an understatement. On the photos was Max Gentry with two men and one woman. Max Gentry with badge and gun. Max Gentry at home. Max Gentry in the supermarket. There were more than thousand pictures.

Max Gentry was a bloody cop.

"Max Gentry doesn't exist Marcos. His real name is Martin Deeks and he is an LAPD detective. He works for the NCIS as a liaison officer. He worked undercover when he approached you."

"Hijo de puta. (Son of a bitch) Who gave you this information?"

"David. Right before I shot him."

"So, it was you after all."

"Yes, it was me. He was useless. I had to put him away somehow."

"Max said he was a Marine."

"Well, part of the deal was that after he got out of jail, he needed to get a straight job. I hooked him up with General Mike Novack from the USMC. It happened that he lost one of his men, Lt. Col. Daniel Langley. He and David looked alike, so who would notice? Nobody. He needed few years to establish his cover, though. But, as soon as his position between the Marines was secure, he started digging. And he found a gold mine."

"How did he know where to look?"

"A friend of mine, to be more precise, Lieutenant Mark Soriano, told me once, over a conversation we had, about an operation that his department handled. You see, this detective was deep undercover and they were few days away of closing the deal and making an arrest. I asked around, but no one knew who the detective was. That's when I called LAPD anonymously and I reported the deal that was supposed to happen on 25th of December. Lt. Soriano bought it and called off the operation. They burst in and made an arrest. The arms stayed intact. And I got to find out who the detective was."

"You fool! I spent 5 years in prison because of you."

"It wasn't entirely me, you idiot! If it wasn't for that undercover none of it would've happened. Yes, you did spend 5 years in jail, but, who do you think that got you out of it?"

"You were the one that pulled it off with the parole committee?"

"Yes. At first I thought David was the cop. He came clean and told me about the real cop. That he suspected the cop was a man named Max Gentry. He played the 'friends' card, so he could investigate more, but the damn guy wasn't saying anything that would intimidate him. Years later, David found out who he was and called me. I told him to lay low and say nothing to no one. On 22nd of December I came to LA. The same day General Novack called me and said that some kind of Inspector from abroad talked to David. He was afraid that David would speak up and that's the reason why I had to kill him."

"Listen, Michael, Max knows about you. What makes you think that he won't find you?"

"His name is Marty Deeks! And he won't find me. He's not that smart."

"What do you suggest?"

"As I said, call him. Tell him you have the weapons. 5000 pieces of AK-47s and 5000 pieces of Heckler and Koch G36s. The deal is worth total of 6 500 000 US dollars."

"You nuts? 5000 pieces of AKs and 5000 pieces of G36s? Do you know the price for them? The real price in the black market? We could sell them 10 times bigger"

"I know. But, this is just to lure Deeks out. After he is out, we'll sell them to others."

"I hope you have a plan Storm, 'cause if you don't we're screwed big time"

"Believe me Marcos, I do. You will help me to lure Deeks on open space so I can shoot and kill him. Plan B, if things go south, you take Deeks and give it to me. I will be parked on the Marriott parking lot that's around the corner. I give you 10 minutes. But, that's 'if'. We'll get this through Marcos. You just call detective Marty Deeks. I'll take care of the rest. He'll remember me for the rest of his life."

* * *

...

The case of the illegal arms dealing that started in 2006 wasn't anywhere near the graph 'solved'. After the meeting between Deeks and Ruiz on Marina Del Rey they hadn't much of a thing to do. Eric and Nell spent the last week or so looking for a connection between Leland (Tanevski) and General Mike Novack. The rental car still didn't move from its current location on North Sierra Bonita Avenue. Besides the phone call that was exchanged on 22nd of December 2014 and few e-mails there wasn't anything else that could move the case from a dead-end. For the thrill of it, Deeks suggested that they should try to link Mark Soriano (his former supervisor) with Novack, Ruiz or Tanevski, but that was a dead-end, too. Deeks had no idea that he was right about his former boss.

And then one day, out of the blue, Ruiz called.

"Marcos. It took you too long to call."

"Well, I was trying to get hold on Leland. Anyway, I have a deal for you and your buyer."

Deeks gave a sign for the others that he'll put the phone on speaker, so they can hear the conversation.

"5000 pieces of AK-47s and 5000 pieces of G36s are coming tomorrow, 12 o'clock."

"Wow! That's a lot of weapons Marcos. I asked you about one case. The case that we left at your place 8 years ago."

"Well, Leland took it 8 years ago, right after I was arrested. But, I'm offering something that you can't turn away."

Deeks looked at his friends and colleagues. Looks of suspicion were written all over their faces. Sam gave him a sign to go on.

"How much money are we talking about?"

"6 500 000 dollars. I'll send you the details by message once you confirm that you're in."

"Let me call my friend and I'll call you back."

Deeks ended the call.

"What was all that about?" Asked Sam.

"I don't know, but something's off Sam." Said Deeks "Our deal was the weapons from 8 years ago. Now he offers 84 cases of weapons. I mean we talk about AK-47s and G36s. Heckler and Koch G36 on the black market cost 10 times more than the AK-47. And the price he gave me was 6 500 000 dollars."

"What are you trying to say Deeks?" Asked Callen.

"Look… Let me explain you something. The AK is one of the most wanted weapons in the world. There are several countries that make their own AK. Russia, China, the Czech Republic, as well Yugoslavia in the past. There are other countries. The caliber for the AK-47 is 7.62x30 mm and it's a medium weight round that's devastating at close range. It's also effective from 300 to 400 meters length. Most of the AKs are select fire weapons, which mean they have three firing modes. The first is safe. That means 'no fire'. The second is single. It means that you can fire every time you pull the trigger. The third is auto, which means you can fire with the weapon as long as you hold down the trigger and as long as there are rounds in the magazine. Most of the AKs hold down to 30 rounds, but there's the drum magazine that can hold up to 75 rounds. On the other side, there's the Heckler and Koch G36 weapon that's higher grade weapon for the arms dealers. The caliber is 5.56x45 mm and it has the same fire arrangements as the AK-47. It costs more from the AK, but its demand is still high, especially for those who want strong design and reliability from their weapon. When we talk about the price, AK-47 costs 500 dollars per unit, and G36 costs 2000 dollars per unit. Normal retain on the normal market."

Kensi whistled.

"That's what I'm trying to tell all along Kens. That's the regular price on the market. The price on the black market is based both on the supply and the demand, which is understandable. If the demand is high that's stimulating for the producers of weapons, so they will want to double the actual price. When there's larger purchase of weapons, for example 1000 units, there might be a discount. Lower demand, on the other side means lower price."

"You want to say that Ruiz can sell this weapons ten times bigger on the black market than the actual price that he gave you?"

"Yes. He gave us a price that will suit smaller amount of weapons, not this big. And why not offer me just G36s? Why did he have to include AK-47 weapons in the offer?"

"You are right." Sam said. "He could've offered G36s and he could've offered them for a larger price than the one you pay for both types of weapons now. Especially because he is dealing on the black market, and this is not an ordinary deal he's making."

"Something's definitely off." Said Kensi.

"There's another thing I noticed. When I went to see Ruiz in his office, remember when I asked him about 25th of December 2006? He said 'Of course I remember. It's the day we got arrested.' "

"Yeah. So what?" Asked Callen. "What does that have to do with what we are discussing now?"

"When we talked on the phone now, he said 'When I got arrested'. Something isn't right in all of this."

"Nothing is right in this case Deeks. You were the one that suggested going in like Max." Said Callen, clearly frustrated about everything that happened since the start of the case.

"Yes, but I never knew that this case will take this turn. Listen, if I've been made there's a good chance that we're going straight to an ambush."

"There is no sign that someone other than David knew about you and about us." Said Sam.

"No one guarantees that in meantime there wasn't someone who accessed the files on David's computer. Who knows where he kept copies. Or, if he worked for someone, he could've easily supplied them with copies of the photos with information just before he was killed. And most probably the person that hired him to follow me, is the one that killed him. And that person could be Michael Leland himself or whatever his name is."

Deeks was right. Sam and Callen knew that what Deeks said it could be a possible option in this case. When they went to Marina Del Rey a week ago nothing indicated that Ruiz knew who Max Gentry truly was, nor that Deeks worked for the NCIS. But, now the way he talked on the phone, the offer he made, seemed strange to all of them.

"We have to take this one guys. We can't back off. Not now, when we are so close to get Tanevski. We have to take the risk." Said Callen, as the team leader. He accessed the situation and he knew that they may be as well as dead, but sometimes the job had its risks.

"I'm with G" Said Sam "We've gone too far to back off now."

Deeks' expression was painful and desperate as he tried to make his friends to change their mind. He knew that he was the one that wanted this job done, he was the one that insisted on the undercover work as Max Gentry, but now he wasn't so sure about that at all. He sensed something in Ruiz's voice that ringed the alarm bells in his head.

"Okay" Said Deeks finally.

"We have your back Deeks." Said Kensi. "Don't worry."

"It's not my back I'm worried about." Said Deeks. He intercepted Kensi's look with his baby blues. "It's yours, and Sam's and Callen's back that I'm worried about. This guy's a pro. In a combination with Ruiz, I don't know what'll happen then. Ruiz is a lunatic. He is guided by his hunch. But, he also sees the facts as they are, and if someone comes to him and says he's got info on Max Gentry, that he's a cop and that he was undercover working for the LAPD to catch him, Ruiz may explode. And something tells me he knows."

"We know how to watch our back, Shaggy." Said Sam "We're not afraid."

_You should,_ thought Deeks.

"We're doing this like we planned from the beginning. I'm going in as the buyer, you go as Max. Kensi and Sam will be close, if things go south. We'll have a SWAT team positioned on all sides for assistance. If we get lucky, Tanevski may be on the scene and we'll take him. If he's not, we'll take Ruiz and close the deal." Said Callen.

"We have less than 24 hours to prepare, so I suggest we better start doing our job." Said Sam. "Deeks, call Ruiz and tell him you'll take the deal."

"On it." Deeks dialed Ruiz's number. "Marcos."

"Yes, Max?"

"I'm in."

"Great. See you tomorrow at noon, my friend."

"See you, Marcos."

…

* * *

Hope joined the team right after she had a conversation with Hetty. She told Hope that she wanted her to join the NCIS team right after the case was over. Hope was surprised with the sudden job proposal by Hetty. She was in LA less than a month and she had the chance to work with California finest. She thought so much of being a secret agent when she would grow up, and finally the dream was about to become true.

Hetty spent the whole morning briefing Granger on the happenings from the last few weeks. He had a major case in Washington D. C. and he couldn't leave it unfinished. She mentioned that she wanted new agent on the team. When Granger asked who the said person is, Hetty explained everything from the beginning. At first Granger was worried about Hope. Primarily, because she came from abroad and was not American. Technically, she was American, because her parents were American, but she had Macedonian citizenship. Of course, Owen Granger didn't know that. Then the language barrier. Third the visa. He found excuses in every single info he heard about Hope. Hetty assured him that she spoke English very well, that she'll take care about the visa and that Hope was as American as the Americans were. Granger knew that he can't argue with the mighty Henrietta Lange. Besides, Henrietta was big girl and she knew right from wrong. He gave Hetty clearance for the new asset.

Hetty called director Leon Vance next, telling him about her decision. He approved, too. Hetty filed all forms needed. All that was missing was Hope's signature. Just like in Deeks' case.

Hope knew that she should complete training before she joined the team fully, but that wasn't a problem. She could do that. It wasn't difficult for her. She did more difficult thing in Macedonia, so the training part wasn't a problem.

She stared at the pages that contained all of her personal information. She took the pen and signed.

"Congratulations, Ms. Brandel. You're now officially in our team. Come with me."

Hope followed Hetty.

"Attention everyone!"

Hetty's announcement made all of them to turn towards her and Hope.

"From now on Ms. Brandel will be a member of this team. She signed the papers this morning. She'll have to do some small tasks before she is officially part of the team, but since she chased our main suspect form Macedonia to LA, she'll help us solving the case as said before. Nothing is changed. Everything will be as it was before. I think she deserves a chance to prove that she is a good officer of the law and I know she'll be a great agent. And I hope that you won't be as hard on her as you were on Mr. Deeks when he joined the team."

She accented the word Deeks.

"I guess that it's in the family to work together Hopes." Deeks smiled.

"Welcome to the team Hope" Said Sam.

Callen shook hands with Hope "Now, you are officially one of our own. Congrats."

"Good luck with us Hope." Said Kensi. She winked at Hope.

Hope smiled, happy that the NCIS team accepted her as one of their own. She knew of cases when people would be in a team for years, yet they still were considered as the black sheep. And from what she just heard, Deeks wasn't very welcomed at first. But, the situation now, as she could see, was very different from its start.

"I see you are all settled for now. I will be in my office if you need me ladies and gentlemen."

Hetty left.

"What's on the menu guys?"

"Tomorrow we have a meeting between Ruiz and Deeks. Callen will go as buyer for the weapons and we were just discussing the strategy plan how to play along if something goes south." Said Sam.

"Sounds like fun. Show me what you've got."

"Sure, grab a chair."

The team worked on the plan for few more hours.

…

* * *

**-January 20****th****-**

Deeks woke up early. He prepared breakfast. He poured some coffee in a mug and he watched the sunrise from the window in the kitchen. His blue eyes were so intensely focused on the sight outside, that his head hurt. He had the same feeling as yesterday and the day before, and he knew, he knew that something was wrong. Something was going to happen. He had this exact same feeling when he was kidnapped by Sidorov. Something about this day was going to change them all.

Hope woke up and found Deeks staring through the window.

"You know, if you want to light the horizon up, it's easier with a gasoline and a lighter. You don't need to push your eyes' power so much."

Deeks smiled at Hope's remark and he turned towards her.

"You know what's ironic? I started this thing and now I am the one that wants to back off. For the first time in my life I want to back off from this one operation. I have the feeling that everything will be revealed. Their lives are at stake. My life is at stake."

"I understand Marty, but it's not your call. It's Callen's. If he says you should go, you go. No questions asked. And I know that you think about this operation as your personal vendetta, but don't be blinded by the feelings, okay? David Lucas it's not worth the try."

"What if I blow up?"

"If you continue to ask yourself that question, then you will surely blow everything up. You need to let go off your fears Marty."

"Have you ever felt like you're choking and you can't breathe, no matter how much you try?"

"Yes, I have."

"I feel like that right now."

Deeks ran his hand through his hair and sat on the couch. Hope stood by the door ready to act if Deeks tried to run through the door on his own, but that never happened.

"I don't know if you read my file before I joined LAPD, but I think you need to know something. I shot my father when I was 11."

"Yeah, I knew that already. Your father was an ass, and you showed him where his place was."

"But, you don't know the circumstances. No one knows them. Except for Hetty, maybe. She knows everything."

"What's the point of telling me that?"

"Hetty told me that I should talk to someone about my past. I thought you would want to listen."

Deeks looked at his cousin with his beautiful blue eyes. Just looking at them would make you weak and disarmed. Hope sat beside Deeks on the couch.

"I am a good listener."

"Lately, I've experienced remembrance of things past. About my past with Gordon John Brandel. My father. I woke up this morning from the nightmare that haunts me these past few weeks. And I can't forget about that time of my life. Fragments, pieces, pictures of my past play in front of my eyes everyday like a slide show in a Power Point presentation."

"Hetty was right. You should talk to someone about this."

"I'm talking to someone. You."

Deeks had pain written all over his face.

"One day my father broke my arm. And he was this close to stab me with the scissors, but my mother stopped him. That was one of the better days, when she actually stood up for me. That day changed a lot of things in my life. It was the first time I had a chance to hold a gun in my hands."

"I fired my father's shotgun with 8."

"Really?"

"Yes. We were hunting birds. My dad aimed this bird high up on the sky and fired. He missed. He dropped the weapon, and he cursed. I took it, recharged it and fired. I hit the bird. Since then, he showed me how to shoot. He was my teacher, and my mentor. It's what helped me in this world of men. And he also taught me all about cars and motorcycles. I love buses though, spent my half lifetime driving in one of them. And trucks. I'm a man in woman's body Marty."

"You remind me of someone I know."

"Kensi?"

"Yes. She's just like you. She even knows how to hotwire a car and break into houses."

"We're cops. We're supposed to prevent that."

"Tell her that."

"However. You were telling me about the first time you held a gun."

"Yes. It was 1990. I was so pissed off that I was going to kill everyone that got on my way. I was like a ticking bomb that waited to explode. I wanted to kill that son of a bitch. I was tired of being whacked around. I asked Ray to buy me a gun. Ray is my best friend. I believe you read that he is in witness protection."

Hope nodded.

"It was Thanksgiving, and we had our dinner. As usual Gordon drank and drank and he was drunk before the turkey was out of the oven. I prayed for him to leave us the hell alone that night. After the dinner, he complained that the turkey was tasteless, that it wasn't baked right. You know guys like him always find excuses when they want to beat the crap out of someone. He started with my mother. She screamed. I tried to go to the kitchen and take the gun, but he caught me before that. I got my daily dosage of beating like always. I couldn't move. I could taste my own blood in my mouth. He broke one of my teeth. I swear I couldn't stand that thing no more. Then he left the house."

Hope saw tears in Deeks' eyes that he tried hard to push back.

"I crawled to the sink and I took the gun. I hid it under my shirt. Gordon came back with the shotgun…" Deeks took a deep breath before he continued. "… and he raised the shotgun aiming at me. I made a decision in the split of a second. I moved to the left. He charged the shotgun and fired. The bullet pierced the wall in the kitchen. He charged again and aimed it towards me for the second time. Then I made the decision. I took out the revolver and squeezed the trigger. I shot him in the left shoulder. He dropped the shotgun and fell on the floor. What happened next, I can't remember. But, I was cleared by the police. They said that it was self-defense and that I wasn't charged with anything. My life was over. The life I had with Gordon John Brandel, anyway. Last time I saw the bastard."

"So, how did you come up with the name Deeks?"

"Deeks was my mother's maiden name. I guess I wanted a little privacy after that event. They all knew her as Brandel, no one knew her as Deeks. I took that name and I became a new person. I moved on. I was 11 years old, but I knew how to handle the situation. Here I am today thanks to that situation. Or at least I think so."

"It must've been difficult for you to have to do that. And walk away like it never happened."

"It was, at the start, but then I got used to it. And now the past is coming back to get me. It's interesting how we are few hours away to close the op that started 8 years ago and I'm talking about my father."

'If you wait for the right time to come Marty, you may wait forever for something to happen. I believe that everything happens for a reason, and there is always a time for everything. We just have to be patient. Which, I have to admit is not one of my strengths."

Both Hope and Deeks knew the double meaning of her words, but neither of them spoke. They sat on the couch for what it seemed like eternity when Deeks' phone rang.

"Yeah? Yes, she is with me. Yeah, we're on our way." Deeks ended the call. "Gear up Hope. It was Callen on the phone. He wants us to go to the Mission.

…

* * *

**-Marina Del Rey-**

Marcos waited impatiently for Deeks to arrive with his 'buyer'. He arranged that meeting on Tanevski's order, but he didn't like it at all. He wanted to kill the detective and get away with the weapons, but he was bound by the word he gave. He was known as a man that always kept his promises. And he promised to do as planned.

_No hay camino para atrás._

A red Chevy Malibu approached the Marina and he could see the driver. And the passenger, too. It was one of the NCIS agents on the photos.

_Wow, two targets with only one bullet. Impressive Marcos. You'll add the kill of a fed to your bio, too, _thought Ruiz while the car approached his office.

Tanevski took his position on the back of Ruiz's office. He had the perfect aim on the detective; he just waited for the right time to come. What he didn't tell Ruiz was that he switched half of the cases with weapons. He had to act quickly without anyone noticing that they were missing.

Kensi parked the SRX just behind a green Ford Taurus. Sam parked the Challenger next to the SRX. Sam and Kensi got out of their cars.

"Sam, something isn't right."

"I feel that too Kensi. Ruiz is too calm. It seems like no one's around, but him."

"I thought that, too." Said Hope as she parked the Mercedes S550. "Hey isn't that the rental Ford? The one that Tanevski rented when he came to LA?"

'It looks like it, yeah." Said Sam. "Hey Eric, can you run the plates on the green Ford."

"Sure. Running now. Okay, the plates belong to a green Ford Taurus, which belongs to 'LA Rental'. It's rented under the name of…"

"… Let me guess. Michael Leland." Finished Sam.

"Yes."

"Why didn't the GPS locator say that the Ford was here?"

"The GPS was turned off 20 minutes ago. That's why it didn't pop up."

"Okay, thanks Eric. Kensi and Hope surround the area. Hope to the east, Kensi to the west. I'll stay here. Alert the team to wait for my sign to move in. If Tanevski's car is here, he might be as well be here, too."

…

* * *

Deeks stopped the car. He and Callen got out. Deeks wore black leather jacket, navy blue shirt and grey colored jeans. Callen wore a suit and a yellow shirt, no tie. He was the businessman, while Deeks was the casual, everyday guy. The Rolex Hetty gave Callen earlier that day, made a perfect match with the suit. Both men were sight for sore eyes. Elegant, charming, and handsome. Deeks approached Ruiz.

"Marcos."

"Max."

"This is my friend, David Webb."

"Whoa, someone read 'The Bourne Identity'."

"What can I tell you, I'm a fan of spy-fiction." Said Callen. "Let's get straight on business. I have an appointment in half an hour."

"I never knew you read 'The Bourne Identity', G." Said Sam on the mike, smiling. Callen smiled inwardly.

"Sure, there are the cases with weapons. You can check them yourself Mr. Webb."

Callen moved towards the cases. He checked the AK-47s and G36s.

"Nice. Your weapons are pure quality."

"I'm a man that works a clean job, Mr. Webb. Now, the money."

Callen moved to the Malibu and took the briefcase with the money. He touched his ear mike and spoke in a low voice.

"This is a trap guys. I think we're made. We better move in after I give him the money. And Sam, just for the record I'm a fan of good books, in case you didn't know."

Sam could actually hear the smirk in Callen's voice. "Okay G, we're in a position. As soon as the handover happens, we move."

Callen closed the door of the Malibu. Hope, Kensi and Sam were in position. The SWAT team was on position too. Callen brought the money to Ruiz.

"It was my pleasure to work with you Mr. Webb and you Max."

_This is getting interesting,_ thought Ruiz. _And now the final touch._

"Or should I say detective Deeks and agent Callen."

Ruiz smiled as he saw the surprised looks on their faces. He thought of Tanevski waiting on the back. He moved few steps ahead, giving him the clear shot. Suddenly Deeks moved few inches backwards in an attempt to take a shot, if he had a chance, drawing his gun. Tanevski fired. Callen was the one who received the bullet, instead of Deeks. Tanevski cussed inwardly. Deeks tried to run, but Ruiz got hold of him. He dragged him to the parking lot in front of his office.

…

* * *

Tanevski shot Callen in the stomach. Deeks watched as his friend fell on the ground, his hands clutched on the wound, as he was dragged by Ruiz.

Sam yelled "G!" in a desperate voice and started shooting. He took down some of Ruiz's men. _That much of a high level security, Mr. Ruiz, _he thought.

Ruiz pressed his left arm on Deeks' neck and with his right held a knife under his jaw to make sure that Deeks won't run away.

Kensi tried to approach Ruiz and take him before he entered the Ford, but Deeks' life was in danger. By shooting Ruiz she risked a bullet in Deeks' body, too. She couldn't take any chances with him. Kensi loved Deeks too much for her to let Ruiz to take him, but she knew it was the right thing for now. She didn't know why, but her mind flashed to the moment two years ago when Deeks kissed her and she left in a hurry on a lame excuse that she must follow Michelle. And then he was kidnapped. He was tortured. He came back as another man. She watched helplessly as Ruiz was trying to force Deeks to get in the car.

Ruiz pulled Deeks towards the car, the green rental Ford. He opened the trunk. He forced Deeks to get inside. Before Ruiz closed the trunk, Deeks saw his friend lying on the ground, bleeding. Ruiz saw the expression on the detective's face. He put on his crooked smile.

"What do they say, mi amigo, keep your enemies close, but your friends even closer. And then kill them."

Ruiz slammed the trunk shut. Everything went black.

...


	8. The Aftermath

**Chapter 8-The Aftermath**

* * *

_**(From Chapter 7)**_

_Ruiz pulled Deeks towards the car, the green rental Ford. He opened the trunk. He forced Deeks to get inside. Before Ruiz closed the trunk, Deeks saw his friend lying on the ground, bleeding. Ruiz saw the expression on the detective's face. He put on his crooked smile._

"_What do they say, mi amigo, keep your enemies close, but your friends even closer. And then kill them."_

_Ruiz slammed the trunk shut. Everything went black._

…

* * *

When Tanevski pulled the trigger he thought of killing the blonde detective, but he missed and now one of the federal agents was lying on the ground in grave danger. But, he and Ruiz had a plan "B" prepared already, so he put his gun under the blouse and fled the scene. He got in the black Cadillac Escalade, started the engine, and headed towards the spot that Ruiz was supposed to arrive in 10 minutes. He called few numbers and all hell broke loose.

God, he hated to leave the Audi on the parking lot, but that was better than the cops making the connection between him and that beautiful car.

Earlier that day, before the detective and his "buyer" came to MDR, Kristijan Tanevski arrived with the black Audi and parked it on the Mariott parking lot. As far as he was concerned the police wasn't aware of the car's existence and he wanted it to stay that way. He thought of the plan that knew Ruiz would like. The basics were next: He left the Audi abandoned on the parking lot. The next thing was that he took a cab and drove to North Sierra Bonita Avenue where he kept the green rental Ford Taurus. He knew that the police knew that he was in LA and they probably tracked him, so he searched for the GPS tracker and removed it. It was of an essence this thing to go as planned. Then he drove the Ford to Marina Del Rey. He switched cars with Ruiz. He took Ruiz's Escalade and parked it out of reach. Ruiz took the Ford and parked it outside his office. Tanevski took his position in Ruiz's office and adjusted his aim. He fired, but he missed his target.

Then he moved to plan "B". To make Deeks' life bitter. And he was just getting started.

…

* * *

**-Down at the Marina-**

Everything was in total chaos. Bullets were flying everywhere. Hope saw Ruiz get in the green Ford after he put Deeks in the trunk. They were in the middle of a shootout, but she couldn't leave her cousin alone. She called Eric in OPS requesting visual on the vehicle Ruiz was driving.

"Sorry Hope, but someone just hacked us. I can't get through the traffic cams. We're working on the problem, but it could take hours."

"Deeks doesn't have hours Eric!"

"I know Hope, but I don't know how else to help you."

"Okay, not your fault anyway."

She shut the phone and started shooting at Ruiz's men. She shot two men, Sam took three out of four and Kensi took down one. Almost every one of Ruiz's men was killed, except of two men that were arrested by the SWAT team. One of them was General Mike Novack.

_What the hell was he doing here?, _was everyone's first thought.

"Come on G, don't let me down! This is not your time!" Sam yelled desperately, trying to stop the bleeding.

Callen couldn't say anything. He was trying hard to keep his eyes open. Then he passed out.

"Where is the ambulance, damn it?!"

"'Should be there any second Sam." Eric spoke on the mike.

Hope looked at her watch. 10 minutes after Deeks was taken. She could hear the sirens of the ambulance coming from afar. She ran off to the Cadillac and started the engine. She had a pretty good idea of where Ruiz was taking Deeks.

…

* * *

Tanevski and Ruiz met on the spot that was marked as their plan "B". Ruiz pulled to a stop on the parking lot and shut down the engine. He took the keys of the rental Ford and unlocked the trunk. He pulled Deeks out of it and cuffed him. He placed duct tape on his mouth and blindfolded him. Tanevski took over and pushed Deeks on the backseat floor. He put a blanket on top of him and closed the door.

"It was good to work with you Marcos."

"Likewise Storm. See ya around."

Tanevski drove the SUV out of the parking lot and headed towards the LA traffic. In a matter of seconds he vanished and no one saw him. He blended in with the other vehicles. He tricked the elite NCIS team. He killed one of their agents and he got hold of the man that ruined his business 8 years ago.

After Tanevski took off, Ruiz got in the green Ford and put it in gear. He started the engine and he left the parking lot. Just after he turned right he saw a silver Cadillac SRX heading towards his direction. He pressed down the gas pedal and sped up a little. The Cadillac did the same.

_Shit._

…

* * *

When they approached the Marina where the headquarters of Ruiz's firm was (Admiralty Way, Marina Del Rey), Hope noticed the big parking lot just outside the Marina. It took 10 minutes give or take to get to the parking lot and lay low, so no one would notice you where there until the path is clear to leave the lot. Suddenly, she got sight of the green rental Ford that Ruiz drove out of the Marina, which previously belonged to Kristijan Tanevski. She called Eric on the phone.

"Eric I'm seeing the green Ford right in front of me. Tell me that the system is back!"

"Yup, it's back. It's like someone wanted us shut down for 10 minutes."

"He just left Marina Del Rey Mariott parking lot. Tell me you got eyes on us."

"Yes, I do."

"Okay, I'm going after him."

Hope took off after the Ford. She was careful not to bump into the trunk, because if she did that, she could hurt Deeks.

Ruiz turned left on West Washington Boulevard and then right on Grayson Avenue. He cut through the traffic like hurricane and he caused few vehicles to change their path and bump into each other.

"Eric, send help on Grayson Avenue. I just saw green Range Rover bum into a bright yellow Chevrolet Aveo that bumped into blue Dodge truck."

"Copy that. Help is on its way."

Ruiz turned left on 28th Avenue and continued right on Dell Avenue. Hope was right behind him as he headed straight on Riviera Avenue and onto Grand Avenue. She lost sight of the Ford as a big truck cut her. Ruiz made a turn on the circular flow and continued on Main Street.

"Eric, tell me that you got sight of the Ford. I lost him."

"He is going straight on Main Street. He just made a left turn on Sunset Avenue."

"Thanks Eric. I see him."

…

* * *

For a moment Marcos Ruiz thought that he lost the woman in the silver SRX as he turned left on the circular flow. But soon he proved he was wrong.

_Some women have balls, huh Marcos?_

…

* * *

Hope continued pursuing the Ford as Ruiz turned right on Pacific Avenue.

"Where the hell are you going Ruiz?"

He continued straight on Nelson Way. Hope tried to take over to the left side, but Ruiz read her and drove to the right. She tried to take over to the right side, but he drove to the left.

For a couple of minutes Hope was chasing Ruiz and the adrenalin rushed through her veins. She never drove a car like the SRX in more than 60 km/h. She was tired of Ruiz already.

"I'm gonna get you son of a bitch! Eric, tell me how to cut him without damaging the back of the car."

"There's a stop on the road just outside Nelson Way. There's intersection between Nelson Way, Pico Boulevard and Ocean Avenue. If you make it on time there's a big chance you can throw him off balance on the left."

"Got it."

Hope did what Eric said. She took over to the left side and she pushed the Ford off the road. For a moment Ruiz lost the grip on the wheel and he bumped into another car. The airbag opened and took him by surprise.

Hope braked hard.

Ruiz felt dizzy and he heard a female voice shouting.

"Put your hands where I can see them! Get out of the car slowly!"

He did as she asked. He knew he had nowhere to go now. The game was over.

"Put your hands on your head! Get down on your knees! Lie down on the ground!"

She took him by his arms and handcuffed him.

"Marcos Ruiz you are under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Everything that you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you can't afford one, one will be appointed to you by the State. You have a right to a phone call…"

After she read him his Miranda rights, Hope put Ruiz in the backseat of the SRX. She went to the green Ford again and took the keys out of the ignition. She unlocked the trunk and opened it. For a moment she just stared inside the trunk and said nothing.

"Eric, Deeks isn't in the trunk. I repeat, Deeks isn't in the trunk."

Her blood pressure went high in a minute when she came down to the SRX and got hold of Ruiz's collar.

_Great minds think alike, huh?_

"Where is he?!"

Ruiz smiled lightheartedly and said nothing.

"Kje te ubijam, me razbirash?! Kje te ubijam kopile edno! Kazhi mi kade e Diks?"

(I will kill you, do you understand that?! I will kill you bastard! Tell me where Deeks is?)

He continued smiling.

"Kuchkin sin!" (Son of a bitch!)

Hope kicked one of the tires of the car.

"Arghhhhh!"

Hope slammed the door of the SRX driver's side shut and she drove straight to the Boatshed.

…

* * *

**-In the Boatshed-**

"Listen you son of a bitch! You are gonna tell me where you took detective Deeks!" Hope yelled.

"I'm not saying anything without a lawyer. I know my rights."

"It's in your best interest to tell us where detective Deeks is. You're facing 25 to life sentence Ruiz. The charges are illegal arms dealing, attempted murder of a federal agent, kidnapping a police officer and conspiracy to commit murder. The murder of David Lucas."

"Whoa, whoa! Wait a minute. I didn't shoot the guy. And I didn't kill David. I already told that to Max."

"It doesn't matter. You knew what was going to happen. That your friend wanted to kill the agent. That's equal as pulling the trigger Marquitos."

Ruiz smiled.

"Why are you smiling? Nothing is funny here!" Hope was on fire and she was afraid that she might lose her temper.

"Where did you take detective Deeks?" Asked Hope with calmer voice.

Ruiz said nothing.

"You're pissing me off Ruiz. Who was the shooter?"

"Figure it out. You are the agent, not me."

"Technically I'm Inspector and not an agent, at least not yet. But, that's none of your damn business. For the last time, where is Deeks?"

Hope had a death glare in her eyes. Her brown eyes were fixed on Ruiz's black like she was trying to kill him without drawing her weapon. He stood perfectly still and smiled.

"I'm going to take that smile off your face Ruiz." Said Hope. "I promise."

Hope left the interrogation room and slammed the door.

"He's not gonna tell us who shot Callen. And he won't tell where Marty is. I'm going to explode. What do you got?"

"General Novack wouldn't say anything either. He asked for a lawyer the minute I brought him here." Said Kensi.

"Any words on Callen?"

"Nope. Sam is pissed." (Pause) "Damn!" Kensi slammed her fist on the table.

"Hey. We'll find him, Kens."

"I know that. But what's going to happen to him in meantime…"

"You're thinking about Sidorov?"

"Yes."

"I wish I could say something that will ease what you're feeling right now, but I don't know what to say. I mean I know that you've been through a lot this year. I read the files. And I can't imagine the pain after what you two went through separately when you were tortured. I believe that made you and Marty even stronger. And I know that you are the bravest and the strongest woman I have ever met in my life. It's okay to be afraid. I know that your mind goes to black scenarios, but we'll find Marty before the man who has him has a chance to do something to him."

Kensi looked at Hope and she saw truthfulness in her words. She knew that Hope meant what she said. In a matter of a few months both her and Deeks experienced things that left them deeply scarred. Each one of them went through hell at the time they were held captive. The wounds on the outside healed quickly, but the wounds on the inside took longer to heal. Deeks once said to her that the pain and the fear will pass with the time being, but she now knew that he said that to reassure her. He himself was still hurting. He was afraid to talk about it, but even after more than a year, Deeks would wake up in the middle of the night, his eyes wet and he'll gaze into the walls searching for an answer on the question, _Why me of all people?._

The least Kensi could do was to love Deeks even more after he came back out of that body shop. And he showed his love and concern for her when she got back from Afghanistan. They left that time out of their lives, but now Deeks was kidnapped again and Kensi was worried that he won't be able to come back from this one.

This case was wearing off Deeks' strength. Even if he didn't want to admit it, it was personal for him. He got to know that the man he thought it was his friend lied to him and that he had a cousin and a family far away. He went through a lot in a short period that Kensi thought he would lose his grounds. He already lashed out the day he found out about the betrayal. She helped him to get through that period, but she knew better than to be fooled by Deeks' "I'm fine". She was sure that he kept his emotions in a place where no one could reach them. The past month those emotions boiled in him to a degree that they threatened to ruin Deeks and possibly affect their "thing".

The one thing that Deeks lacked the most, beside the communication skills, was controlling his emotions. He was impulsive when it came to that.

But, Kensi trusted Deeks with her life. After her dad, Deeks was the only person that had the ability to make her comfortable and loved. He made her feel like a princess. He was the one person in the world she trusted the most and loved the most, and she knew that Deeks would do everything to get back to her alive. He was one hell of a fighter.

"I guess Angello was right about the three hearts." Kensi wasn't aware that she said that out loud.

"What?"

"Nothing. So, what do we do now Hope?"

"I was thinking about something Kens. There are few aspects of this thing. First, the car that Ruiz drove. It was the green Ford Taurus that Tanevski rented when he arrived to LA under his alias Michael Leland. The last time I checked Ruiz drove black Cadillac Escalade. Second, the parking lot. It's where the exchange happened. Whoever has Deeks waited there to pick him up."

"In Ruiz's Escalade?"

"Maybe. Which gives us the question, who was the mysterious man driving Ruiz's Escalade? And who shot Callen."

"Eric ran all of the vehicles that left MDR Mariott parking lot before Hope spotted Ruiz."

"Got it. Just a sec. Okay… 10 minutes after the shootout, Ruiz entered in the parking lot. 2 minutes later a black Escalade left the parking lot. I'll try to zoom in and sharpen the image. And here's our mystery man."

"Oh my God. It's Kristijan Tanevski." Hope looked at Tanevski's image on the screen as she connected the dots. "So, Tanevski shot Callen, but my guess would be he was aiming at Deeks. Somehow, one of them moved and he missed. He shot the wrong person. They had plan "B". Tanevski takes the Escalade, while Ruiz is supposed to take Deeks and leave with the green Ford. He meets Tanevski at the parking lot and then Tanevski leaves with Deeks. And for all that time the system in OPS is hacked. It was intentional after all. Tanevski calls for favor, we get shut down for 10 minutes and he gets away. Eric, can you tell us where Tanevski went?"

"He took off right on West Washington Boulevard. I don't know where he went after that. He mixed up with the other cars in the traffic."

"Perfect. So, he has Deeks with him and Ruiz's Escalade. He would want to lay low somewhere near MDR for a while. Eric, check the larger building that are near Marina Del Rey. Warehouses, shops, markets, everything that has a large basements or a place where Tanevski might keep Deeks."

"Okay." (Typing) "There are 13 larger buildings that can be reached in time frame of 30 minutes. But, they are scattered on the map like Christmas tree lights. How we narrow this down?"

"Call Sam and tell him that we need his assistance. We can take another available NCIS teams and include LAPD in our search. We can go warehouse by warehouse. If we find anything we call off the others, but if not, we search every place thoroughly. In case we don't find anything we'll try another angle. I'll go talk to Ruiz one more time."

…

* * *

"We know where your friend is headed Ruiz. I'll make sure you share the same cell with him in federal prison."

"Federal prison?"

"Yes. This is a federal investigation Ruiz. A federal agent gets shot, another kidnapped. I already told you that. So, it's a federal matter."

"I thought Max was a detective."

"He is. But he has the status of a federal agent. I guess I forgot to mention that earlier. Silly me."

"Where is my lawyer?"

Suddenly Ruiz felt uncomfortable. He knew this was a federal investigation, but he thought because of Max's title that the LAPD would be the one responsible for him. _Guess I was wrong_, Ruiz said to himself. He did this job because of Storm and it was his idea to kill Max. It wasn't his fault that the fed got shot. He was just following orders.

"He is on his way. Just one more question. Where's your Escalade?"

"I don't know. Someone stole it couple of nights ago."

"Did you call the police?"

"No, I thought of finding it myself first."

"How convenient, huh? Has Michael Leland come today to Marina Del Rey, Ruiz?"

"No. Why?"

"Maybe, he took it, when he came today."

"I said he didn't."

"I know he is the one that shot agent Callen and shot detective Deeks. So, cut the crap and confess before you go to trial. You'll save the State's money. And we have a footage that shows us Leland drove your SUV out of the parking lot just before you left."

"That proves nothing. It's circumstantial evidence."

"I don't think so. If I were you, I would've started the preparations for prison life."

Ruiz said nothing, but he was clearly upset. Hope left the boatshed together with Kensi. Before she left, she watched on the screen while Ruiz's mood changed.

"I guess I took the smile off your face, Marcos Ruiz after all."

…

* * *

**-In the hospital-**

Sam spent almost two hours in the hall, waiting for someone to tell him what was going on with Callen. They were partners for 7 years now, almost 8, and he felt Callen was like his brother. He remembered the moment when Callen got shot few years back. When he thought he would die. He had the same feeling now. He jumped every time a nurse left the operation hall. But, no one told him more than he already knew. "He lost a lot of blood. We're still not sure what'll happen." The same babble they did as always. The thought of losing his partner was overwhelming. The big guy that always smiled now was sad and he couldn't help, but wonder if he should've listened to Deeks' pleads. And then his phone rang. It was Eric.

"Yo, Sam, sorry to interrupt you, but you need to come back to OSP."

"Why?"

"I'll brief you when you get here."

Sam was mad when Eric called and said that Kensi and Hope needed his help. He wanted to stay in the hospital in case there were news on Callen's state, but the truth was he was more useful in the field then in the hospital. There was not anything he could do to help G right now. He started the engine on the Challenger and headed to OPS.

…

* * *

**-In OSP-**

"Sam, how's Callen? Asked Hope.

"Still in surgery. What have you got?"

"We have 13 addresses to cover. We need a plan."

"Okay… This three on West Washington Boulevard will be covered by Hope and one NCIS team. The other three on Lincoln Boulevard will be covered by Kensi and another NCIS team. The four on Maxella Avenue will be covered by me and the third NCIS team. The rest of the addresses on Mirandao Way, Melrose Avenue and McConell Avenue will be covered by LAPD. If we find anything in any of the buildings in question we'll proceed with extreme carefulness. We don't wanna lose Deeks."

Hope could hear the worried sound of Sam's voice and she asked himself _was it because of what happened with Sidorov? Or because Sam became too much emotionally bonded with Deeks?_ She was aware that both of them were tortured in the hands of Isaac Sidorov, and one hell of a bond was connected to it. Sam wasn't a guy that will do something unpredictable, but if he was cornered like he was now, he was a ticking bomb waiting to explode. His partner was just shot and his other teammate, his friend was kidnapped.

"We move in 30 minutes. Everybody stand by and wait for my orders. Study the plan once more and be prepared for anything."

…

* * *

**-North Sierra Bonita Avenue-**

The house on North Sierra Bonita Avenue was two stories high, 250m2 large with additional space of 100 m2 that served as patio. Kristijan Tanevski had all the privacy in the world and he knew that they can't be found. Well, at least for a few hours he could enjoy his prey. He parked the Escalade on the back of the house and opened the garage. He put the cat in the garage and turned off the engine. He opened the back door. He pulled the blanket off the blonde detective that spent the last 29 minutes on the floor of the car. He took him by the arms and straightened him up. He kicked and tried to run, but a kick in the back was enough to stop him for now. He had different plans for him.

Kristijan Tanevski finally had the man that ruined his plans 8 years ago. The plan was that he and Ruiz had a deal for a shipment with weapons that was supposed to arrive on 27th of December 2006. But, two days before that, on 25th of December 2006 he made it possible for the LAPD, to get in and stop the arms dealing ring that Ruiz led. He practically ruined his own operation, but he did it so he could find out who the undercover cop was. He had two guesses.

The first was David Lucas and the second was Max Gentry. After the arrest Tanevski used his alias and visited Lucas in prison. He questioned his as a police officer would do, but he didn't know anything about the operation. Not more than he should, not less. Plus LAPD wouldn't let one of their own to rot away in prison. He was certain that Max was the missing link. David told that to him. David also told him about the research he conducted on Max Gentry and that the data he found on the Internet looked like they were put together just to cover the basics of a character that didn't exist. He got himself in Max's world, being his friend. As the months went by Max was as tough as the first day David met him and he couldn't extract any info out of him. That's when Michael Leland promised him that after he serves his two year sentence he'll find him a job.

And Michael Leland never backed off his word. In 2008 David Lucas got out. Michael called a good friend of his, General Mike Novack and arranged for David to start his work as a Marine. That was part of his cover. Knowing David, he was strong and born leader; he could pass as a Marine anytime. He knew how to do the job. But, Michael had one condition in exchange of the help. He needed David to research Max again, but now form a different angle and he did that. This time it was to find out his real identity.

One of the many flaws detective Marty Deeks had, was the routine. He was a creature of habit. He would go out in the same places, he bought his clothes in one store, and he was running the same path every morning. Because of that, he was once shot. Sam was like his mother then and told him to change his habits frequently. But Marty was stubborn as always and he didn't do as asked.

That's how David found him. He was sitting in the bar where they went out few times in the past. The same bar where Hetty met Deeks in 2010, with a job offer which he accepted. Some things never change. It was enough for David to ask the bartender who the guy was and the next thing he heard was "That's Marty". He started digging all the guys that had the first or last named Marty or Martin and he found the match.

Detective Martin A. Deeks was born on 8th of January 1979 in Los Angeles. He lived on 1894 Parkson Avenue. His social security number was 987 00 4320. He drove red Chevrolet Malibu, plates California-43DK814. He also owned a motorcycle Triumph Bonneville T100, Steve McQueen Edition. His education was impressive. He attended Reseda High School in Reseda, California. Then he went to Law School and got a degree, Juris Doctor. After Law School he enrolled in Police Academy. But before that he worked for the Office of the Public Defender in LA County. Then he joined the LAPD. LAPD was his current employer, but he worked as a liaison officer in the Naval Criminal Investigative Service for the Office of Special Projects since 6th of April 2010. His badge number was #8523. His supervisor in LAPD was Lt. Roger Bates. His previous supervisor was Lt. Mark Soriano. His supervisor in NCIS was the Operations Manager Henrietta Lange "Hetty". His colleagues were Special Agent in Charge/Senior Field Agent G. Callen, Special Agent/Senior Field Agent Sam Hanna, former Navy SEAL, and Special Agent/Junior Field Agent Kensi Blye, that was Deeks' partner. Sometimes on the picture appeared Assistant Director Owen Granger. Deeks' specialization was undercover work. His weapon of choice was Beretta S27S, but he used the weapon that his colleagues used. SIG&amp;SAUER. His hobby was surfing and you could see him going on a beach every now and then to enjoy the waves.

David took pictures. A lot of pictures. But, for the whole time he followed Deeks, David never called Leland back. In the middle of December, Novack called Leland and told him that David was acting strange and that he should check him out. On December 22nd he arrived to LA and found out that some Inspector from God knows where (He was stupid enough not to know that the police from his home town was after him) questioned David about his possible connection to Kristijan Tanevski. He had no choice. He had to kill David. He was afraid that David will open his mouth after all these time.

So, he followed David on 25th of December first at work and when he took off he continued tailing David to his home. When he saw him, David started running. Leland eventually caught him and asked for the information he had on the cop. David gave him the USB drive where the photos and docs were stored. Leland put two bullets in him and watched him die. He checked for witnesses and when he was sure that no one was around he left the scene.

But, Kristijan Tanevski left a small piece of the puzzle behind him. The Inspector from God knows where, Hope Brandel from Macedonia that followed his tracks in L.A. was from the same country of his origin.

The second piece of the puzzle was that the NCIS also knew about the photos and documents David gathered. And they knew about him too.

He did leave a trail after all.

…

* * *

Tanevski dragged Deeks to the living room where he cuffed him on one of the table legs. The table was solid steel, so he couldn't move the cuffs or to break the trestle.

Deeks adjusted his sight as Tanevski pulled off his blindfold. The living room was paired with the kitchen. Across the hall were located too large rooms and on the right was the toilet. There were stairs that led to the second floor. On the right was the front door. His only way out. The windows were sealed and he couldn't risk opening them. The drive from MDR to the current location lasted 29, maybe 30 minutes. He had no idea where he was, but he had a pretty good idea how to run away. In a few minutes Tanevski will be back and it was the only time he would be able to escape.

Tanevski entered the room and the first thing he did was to hit Deeks on the face. He hit him couple of times on the stomach and in the back, but Deeks stood still and said nothing. Tanevski lowered himself and caught Deeks' chin with his right hand. He made Deeks look into his eyes. The eyes of the Devil. Just when he thought of smashing Deeks' head in the trestle, Deeks took him by surprise when he pressed his leg with his foot until he heard a crack. Tanevski let go of Deeks and took his injured leg in his hands. Deeks made the next move and tangled his legs around Tanevski's neck. Tanevski blacked out. Deeks pulled Tanevski as hard as he could and with the right hand searched his pockets. He took the key and unlocked the cuffs.

His next move was to run through the door. He got on the street and started running. He didn't know where, he just run. He passed a block, then two, and the next thing he saw was a big billboard that indicated he was in West Hollywood. A realization dawned on his face. He was held in Tanevski's house on North Sierra Bonita Avenue. He was running when he saw a car approaching. He stopped the car. A man and a woman got out clearly upset.

"Please, help me. I'm an LAPD detective and a man grabbed me…"

He didn't even finish his sentence when someone hit him on the head. Deeks fell on the ground.

"Go away! I said, go away!"

The couple was so afraid of the man with the gun that they took off immediately. But, the man called 911 and reported what he saw.

Tanevski leaned against Deeks. "No one escapes from its destiny detective Deeks. And your destiny is to be killed by my hands."

He dragged Deeks to the Escalade that he parked a block away. He locked the door this time. He took Deeks to the second floor in one of the rooms. He threw him on the floor and kicked him.

"You son of a bitch! You'll pay dearly for what you've done to me! I can guarantee you that."

…

* * *

**-Costco Vision Center-**

Hope took the plan on Costco Vision Center that was located on 13463 West Washington Boulevard. It contained large parking lot to the south with a side street to the west Walnut Avenue (If Tanevski wasn't hiding in that building he could've taken one of the houses on Walnut Avenue) on the other side of a small wall and bordered by a sidewalk. There was a small loading dock on the corner of the building next to the Vision Center and the entrance/exit to the parking lot went past a Subway sandwich shop and a Starbucks coffee house. Damn, she loved Starbucks. The Vision Center was in some kind of small type shopping area. There were few entrances to the Vision Center, and couple of heating/air vents. There were also access walkways on all the entrances. The Vision Center had two large basements that could be accessed by the stairs, but either way if you wanted to go to one of the two basements with surveillance camera would've caught your movements.

Hope thought of entering the front door, while the other agents covered the other entrances and the parking lot. She concluded that they must act carefully and silently and not to spook Tanevski if he was hiding in there somewhere.

After Costco Vision Center, Hope and the first NCIS team were supposed to cover two more objects. The first was Buy Cheap Software and the second 99 Cents Only Stores on West Washington Boulevard.

…

* * *

**-Office of Special Projects-**

Sam had the plan of Villa Marina Marketplace Mall in front of him in the rest room. He was thinking about Callen and Deeks while studying the plan and how they should make the entering.

"You seem out of focus Mr. Hanna."

Hetty startled Sam and he almost jumped out of the couch.

"I am focused."

"Oh, yes you are. That's why are staring in the plan 10 minutes and you have no clue how to do the job."

"Of course I know how to do the job Hetty. There's a large parking lot on all sides of the Mall, with multiple entrance/exit points for the traffic. On the north we have Maxella Avenue, on the east Glancoe Avenue and on the south Marina Express Way. It contains multiple loading docks, service entrances and access basements. The parking lot is bordered with sidewalks and palm trees and apartment buildings across the streets. Now, am I focused Hetty?"

Hetty felt the irony and anger in Sam's voice. It was understandable. His partner was shot and fought for his life. On the other hand Deeks was missing and he was forced to search some buildings that they weren't sure if he was in one of them.

"Look, Mr. Hanna I know that you are worried about Mr. Callen and Mr. Deeks, but I need your head in this operation. If you can't do this, let me know."

"I can do this Hetty. It's just I'm pissed off that Tanevski played us all once again. He somehow got hold on the data that David gathered on Deeks and us and convinced Ruiz to play along with him. When he saw Deeks coming with one of the agents he thought that he could take them both. What bothers me is why he shot Callen and grabbed Deeks? He could've easily shoot Deeks and grab Callen."

"I think that was his intention Mr. Hanna. But, he somehow missed and shot Mr. Callen. He had to take Mr. Deeks. Ruiz helped him. He wouldn't admit if the thing was Tanevski's idea, but I'm pretty sure he was just helping him with the weapons part. Marcos Ruiz doesn't have the balls to plan this thing and then run like a coward."

"Let's hope we'll find Deeks on time before Tanevski kills him."

What he meant was, before Tanevski did something to him.

…

* * *

**-Action Watersports-**

Action Watersports was located on 4144 Lincoln Boulevard. It was a small shop with access on the back and on the front. There was no street parking, and it looked like the only lot was to the south between Action Watersports and the Dollar Tree (the building next door). The back had a chain-link fence around it, with a tall steel rack with kayaks and canoes on it. There were some larger kayaks propped against the back fence sticking over the top. The fence was covered with tarps, so people on the sidewalk or the street can't see what's in the fenced-in area. There was a Harley Davidson Motorcycle Shop "Bartel's Harley Davidson" across the street from the Watersports building.

Kensi smiled to herself, while she thought of Deeks that could be in the building. She couldn't help, but think how much he'd like these two shops.

"Damn Deeks, where are you?" Kensi sighed. She spoke on her mike. "Okay guys, we do this on 3. Three, two, one… Go!"

The NCIS team with Kensi burst into the building searching for Deeks, but no one was there.

"This is the third building we cover and there's no sign of Deeks. Sam?"

"Same here Kensi."

"Hope?"

"Nothing here, too."

"Okay, let's get back to OSP and figure out our next move."

…

* * *

It was close to 5 p.m. and still there wasn't a word on Deeks. Sam said that he'll check on Callen in the hospital. It was understandable. He was his best friend and partner and he wanted to be there when Callen got out of surgery. Hope and Kensi worked on the possibilities where Tanevski could hide especially when he had Deeks and a big SUV.

…

* * *

**-North Sierra Bonita Avenue-**

When Deeks woke up he felt a sharp pain in his head. It hurt to move his head, but it also hurt to move his arms and legs. He tried to get up, but his body ached. He wasn't sure how much time went by since he escaped, but he was sure that Tanevski found him. He remembered talking to a couple in the street and then nothing.

What now? He couldn't the risk to try to escape again. The only thing left was the hope. He hoped that his friends are coming for him. Then he remembered Callen was shot.

"Oh God, what have I done? I just sent my friend in death."

Then Deeks' thoughts flew to Kensi. He was sure she was pissed about what happened to him and that she was worried. Hell, maybe she even cracked someone's neck. He knew how this case was dangerous, but the thought of never seeing Kensi again overwhelmed him. He remembered all the moments they shared together throughout the years. All the times they got out pretending they were just friends. Kensi smiling to his stupid jokes.

And he thought of all the moments they wouldn't share, if Tanevski decides to kill him. Instead of black scenarios, Deeks focused on the moment when he'll see Kensi and her beautiful mismatched eyes. He vowed that he'll stay alive to the moment when he and Kensi will be together again.

And then he blacked out, again.

…

* * *

**-In OSP-**

"I was thinking about the weapons the whole time and I can't find anything that'll help us find out where's Deeks."

"I may have an answer to that Hope." Said Nell.

"Let's hear it."

Ruiz told Deeks that the deal was over 5000 pcs of AK-47s and 5000 pcs of G36s. That's approximately 84 cases with weapons. Half an hour ago LAPD sent their report on the confiscated weapons. There were indeed 84 cases, but half of the cases were empty. Someone took the weapons before the exchange."

"Tanevski. He must've taken them. He set up Ruiz and us."

"The weapons had a GPS tracker in them. The company that sent them to Tanevski suspected something is wrong and they put trackers in them. They can't be pinpointed exactly where they are, but the last two hours the GPS says the weapons are somewhere I West Hollywood."

"West Hollywood… Why's that sound so familiar?" Asked Hope.

"Because that's where Tanevski lived in 2006. North Sierra Bonita Avenue, West Hollywood. And Tanevski's workplace was in West Hollywood, too. Fed Ex Office Print &amp; Ship Center. "

"Yeah. Now, I remember. So, Tanevski is either at his house or in Fed Ex. I doubt that he'll revisit his old workplace now that he is wanted for attempt of murder of a federal agent and kidnapping of another. He needs a secluded spot, where no one will disturb him and no one will question his actions. That leaves us the house. Last I checked the house was two stories high, and with great isolation. It's a large house with a large space as a patio, and a garage where he could've left the Escalade and the weapons. If he took half of the weapons it means he already has a buyer. Nell, check if Tanevski made contact with someone in between, after Deeks' kidnapping."

"Okay. Here says, that Kristijan Tanevski used his credit card under the name of Michael Leland to buy a pre-paid phone. He called a number in LA. The phone call lasted 2 minutes. After that Tanevski ditched the phone. I'll try to pinpoint the exact location of the receiver of the call. And… it's a payphone in a gas station on Mullholland Drive. Other than that I'd say he wants to lay low."

"He's smart. He wouldn't be so obvious as to let us know who the buyer is. However, let's check the house. Send me the exact address on my phone. Alert the LAPD. Tell them to send the cavalry. It's top priority."

Hope grabbed the keys from the SRX and flew through the stairs.

"Kensi!"

"I'm here. What's up?"

"Nell found a possible lead to where Deeks could be. It's Tanevski's house on North Sierra Bonita Avenue. Come with me. We need to end this once and for all."

…

* * *

**-On their way to North Sierra Bonita Avenue-**

Hope's phone rang.

"Hey Eric, what do you got?"

"I got a video from Ruiz's office from yesterday around the time he called Deeks."

"And?"

"And, it turns out that Tanevski drove black Audi R8 GT Spyder. Brand new."

"Then why he did he took Ruiz's Escalade?"

"That's a good question. As we all know they switched car. Earlier today Ruiz parked the Escalade on MDR Mariott parking lot. Tanevski parked the Audi in plain sight. Then he took a cab and got back to North Sierra Bonita Avenue. He must've figured we knew about the Ford, so he pulled out the GPS tracker and led us to believe that the car is still there. Another camera angle shows that Ruiz drove the Audi to a camera blind spot before Deeks and Callen arrived. He probably thought that the Audi will remain hidden. After he did that, he entered Ruiz's office and he settled on the back. After he shot Callen he took off with the Escalade. That's about the time we were hacked."

"So, he had enough time to park the Audi, take Deeks hostage in Ruiz's Escalade and no one even noticed."

"Exactly."

"Perfect. Where's that Audi Eric?"

"According to the records from the parking lot it's still there"

"Okay. Send a team to pick it up. Good job Eric."

"Thanks Hope. And, Sam is headed your way."

"How's Callen?"

"He got out of surgery. It looks like he lost a lot of blood, but nothing serious. He'll spend few days in the hospital, but his vitals are good. Sam said he'll probably wake up in the morning.

"Good news."

Which were about to get worse.

"Hope?"

"Yes, Eric?"

"20 minutes ago, a couple called 911 to repot some man attacking another man. The description matches Tanevski and Deeks."

"Where?"

"West Hollywood."

"Thanks again Eric. Kens, we got him."

Hope pressed the gas pedal as she was seeing the first street lights light up in the vicinity of West Hollywood.

…

* * *

**-North Sierra Bonita Avenue-**

Tanevski moved the cases with weapons that he managed to recover before the meeting happened, in the garage. He had weapons that were worth 3 million dollars, but he wanted to sell them for 10 million dollars on the black market and he already had a buyer. He talked to him and they agreed to meet in a few days in a secluded place. By then, he'll kill the detective and he'll flee with the money. A perfect plan with a lot of holes.

Deeks woke up after he blacked out the second time. His head was throbbing, but he managed to control the pain. Probably he had a concussion. He calculated how long it would take to subdue Tanevski again and to find a way out when he heard footsteps approaching the room. He closed his eyes.

Tanevski came back in the house and entered in the room where he kept Deeks. He placed him on the second floor and he double cuffed him, so he couldn't escape. Not that he would after the blow in the head, but just to be sure. That bastard wouldn't give up. When he opened the door, Deeks was still unconscious; at least he looked like it. On the back of the head where he hit him, his hair was crimson. He took out the key and unlocked the cuffs that held Deeks on the bed. He lifted Deeks with intention to remove him from the room, but that's when Deeks opened his eyes.

He placed his left elbow in Tanevski's chest and ran through the door. _This was his chance,_ he thought. Deeks looked at every corner of the second floor for an escape route. But he didn't find one.

At first Tanevski had difficulties to stand up because of his hurt leg and he had trouble breathing. _That son of a bitch is actually pretty strong_, thought Tanevski._ And he just won't give up. _He got up and chased Deeks through the hall. He spotted him just before Deeks hit the stairs.

…

Deeks spotted the stairs.

"Finally."

"Not yet detective."

Deeks could feel the coldness of the gun against his back through the jacket and stood perfectly still. He knew that this was the end and he closed his eyes.

Instead of hearing a shot he heard the gun fall to the ground and Tanevski pulled Deeks back.

"Show me what you've got bitch. It's your only way out. Fight for your life."

Tanevski gave the first blow. He hit Deeks on his face and split his lip. Deeks closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, ready to give the next blow. He struck Tanevski in the stomach with his foot. Tanevski clutched his hands on his stomach. He didn't have the time to react as Deeks hit him in the hurt leg again. Right in the middle where the knee joined the upper part of his leg. Tanevski screamed as he fell on the floor holding his hurt leg. The pain seared through his body, starting at his knee, through his thigh and up. He was unable to stand up. _That son of a…_

But, as soon as Deeks thought that his path is clear Tanevski somehow rose and hit Deeks in the back. Deeks staggered forward. He managed to grab the stairs railing. Just as he turned to hit Tanevski with his left hand folded into a fist, Tanevski managed to back away and to prevent Deeks' blow. That made Deeks strike in empty space and it gave Tanevski the leverage he needed. He punched Deeks on the face. Deeks felt sharp pain in the left side of his face. He felt blood dripping from it. He lost his grip of the railing as he held his bleeding cheek. His right leg slipped.

…


	9. Under

**Chapter 9-Under**

* * *

**The lyrics belong to their authors respectively**

* * *

Christine Deeks sat on the sofa in the living room thinking about Hetty's visit few days prior. She replayed every word in hear head more than once, trying to understand what was Hetty's intention. She spoke indefinite sentences and it was almost like she was trying to send her a hidden message.

Once every week Rocky, her second husband played cards with his friends. They used that time of the week to see each other and to do something that pleased them all and that Tuesday, 20th of January 2015 was the day for them playing cards.

Rocky Ellison was a former LAPD Sergeant Detective. She met him on the day her son shot his father. He took their statements and he was the leading detective on that investigation. He concluded that Marty acted in self-defense and that there was no need for charges to be filed. That was the time they actually started seeing each other as more than just officer of the law and victim in the case.

First, Rocky would visit her as a friend, concerned that Gordon John Brandel would come back and finish the job, but he never came. He was busy going to jail every few months.

Few years after the initial event that got them together Rocky told her that Gordon had died in prison. That was back in 1998. Somehow she felt empty after his death, but she quickly let go off that. She loved him once. They never divorced. She knew she should be relieved by his death, yet she wasn't. They lived separately for almost 8 years and there wasn't anything that connected her to that man except Marty, but Marty was long gone, too.

And then the marriage offer came out of the blue. Rocky told her that he knew what she's been through and that he wanted her to be his wife. That he loves her and that she'll be his queen.

Christine was afraid to marry him, considering her experience as married woman, but when she saw how much Rocky loved her and respected her, she accepted.

And she wasn't disappointed. It was one decision in life that she made that she wasn't sorry about. He treated her like his equal. He always did something romantic. He bought her flowers, clothes, he was indeed treating her like queen. Like he promised. A man of word and deed.

Rocky knew that Marty left the house right after he shot Gordon. Christine never talked about her son and he respected that. He never asked about that time of her life. Eventually, she'd give him tidbits of what happened, but nothing more than he already knew. He didn't want to push the matter farther that where it was.

Rocky Ellison watched how Christine transformed throughout the years. When he met her she was bruised and battered, a weak woman. Now, she was beautiful again and healed. He wished he was on Marty's place when he shot the bastard, and instead of the shoulder, the bullet to hit his head.

Christine thought of all these things when she switched the TV on. She watched the news on ZNN TV. She almost screamed as she saw her son's face on the screen.

"… _earlier today detective Marty Deeks was kidnapped by a known arms dealer Michael Leland. He was found few hours ago, but it's very important to announce that Michael Leland escaped. Every one that knows where is he should call the LAPD hotline. The number should be displayed on the screen right about now. We will be back with more information…"_

"Marty…"

Christine turned off the TV. She took her jacket and she left the house in a hurry. She forgot to leave a note, so she called her husband on the phone instead. She explained the situation to him. The next phone call was to Hetty.

"Ms. Lange?"

"Yes?"

"It's Christine. Where's my son? How is he?"

"Calm down Ms. Deeks. He is been taken to the hospital and he just got out of surgery. He'll be fine."

"I'll be there as soon as possible."

Christine pressed the gas pedal of the white Volvo and she was followed by series of blaring horns. She didn't give a damn. All that she wanted was to see her son.

She knew that she was mean to him and that she said things she still regretted, but she did that to protect him. She knew how mad Gordon could get and she wanted her son to live. She wanted him away from her and she succeeded. She knew that if Marty stayed in that house, he would've been killed by his father that hated him. She knew her son was strong and that he'd survive. The signs of that strength were still imprinted in the kitchen wall. Two bullet holes that Gordon left trying to kill her son. And now, 15 years later, Marty's life was in danger again. Christine promised to herself that she'll do everything to gain her son's love again.

On the radio was playing Daughtry's song "Undefeated". The lyrics reminded Christine of her past. It was like the past conspired against her.

"_Ho__ooooope__  
__Ho__oooope__  
__H__ooooo__ope_

_Swing left, swing right__  
__Bruised and black-eyed, half alive__  
__Bleeding, choking__  
__Bent__, __not broken _

_Inside_

_And in this world of compromise__  
__I hit every curb, every red light__  
__Trying to keep both hands on the wheel__  
__But through it all I'm…_

_Still undefeate__eeee__d__  
__With my back against the ropes__  
__Still undefeate__eeee__d__  
__You can knock me down with body blows__  
__But you cannot break my h__oooo__ope_

_Hoooope_

_Hoooope_

_Weak knees, can't stand__  
__Raise up your hands__  
__Don't walk away__  
__Been sucker punched but I'm not down__  
__My feet have never left the ground__  
__It's a fight that I can fix__  
__Like a cut that needs a stitch__  
__And somehow through it all I stand_

_Still undefeat__eeeee__ed__  
__With my back against the ropes__  
__Still undefeat__eeee__ed__  
__You can knock me down with body blows__  
__But you cannot break my ho__ooooo__pe_

_Hooope_

_Hoooope__  
__Cannot break my ho__oooo__pe_

_Hoooope_

_Hoooope__  
__Cannot break my hope_

_We're the ones who take the beating__  
__Get back up and we're still breathing__  
__We are the ones__  
__We'll take the hit straight to the face__  
__And never look the other way__  
__We are the ones_

_Still undefeated__  
__With our backs against the ropes_

_We're still undefeat__eee__ed__  
__We'll break these chains__  
__To let them know__  
__They cannot break our ho__ooo__pe_

_Hoooope_

_Hoooope_

_T__hey cannot break our ho__oooo__pe_

_Hoooope_

_Hoooope__  
__They cannot break our hope__  
__They can break us down but they can't break our hope__."_

…

* * *

Kensi held onto the dashboard as Hope passed through the traffic like a lightning. She was driving worse than Deeks, but Hope reminded her of herself when she was like walking on nails. The song on the radio was completely unknown to Kensi, but she heard Hope actually sing it.

"_Don't burry me_

_Don't let me down_

_Don't say it's over_

'_Cause that would send me under_

_Underneath the ground _

_Don't say those words _

_I want to live, but your words can murder _

_Only you can send me under, under, under."_

Kensi thought about how much stressed Hope must be that she could sing out loud while they were headed for the house where a lunatic possibly held Deeks? On a scale of one to ten, maybe 15. Kensi knew how much Hope loved Deeks. She knew him barely a month, but for Hope, Deeks was like the big brother she never had.

"I sing to myself when I'm nervous, it that's what you wanted to ask me." Said Hope and interrupted Kensi's thoughts.

Kensi opened her mouth to say something, but decided against it. _How (the hell) did Hope knew what she was thinking?_

On the radio came the song "Crawling Back to You" by Daughtry. Kensi jumped in her seat as Hope nearly crossed on the other side of the road in an attempt to take over a red Chevy Camaro. The driver blared the horn and cursed, as Hope was speeding up.

"I don't think that the guy in the red Camaro will buy you a drink anytime soon." Joked Kensi.

"Even if he said something about a drink, I wouldn't have accepted his offer either." Said Hope.

Soon, both of them spotted the house. It was little over 5 p.m. and the night was slowly stepping in. Hope knew that at this time of the year in Macedonia would be full of snow, and the traffic would be like a mush, but this was LA and the weather was warm. It rained a little, but the air was warm.

Hope stopped the car and got out of it. So did Kensi. Hope saw the SWAT team that helped them earlier today in Marina Del Rey. She heard engine behind her and she saw Sam's Challenger SRT pull in the driveway.

"What's the plan?" asked Hope.

"Well," the head of the SWAT team spoke "we were thinking of a way how to approach the house. We have the front and the back door, no basement. Access points from the fire stairs and the roof. One team will go through the fire stairs, another from the roof. You can cover the front and the back door."

"Hope you and Kensi go through the front door. I'll go through the back door. Let's not lose Tanevski this time." Said Sam.

…

* * *

_**(From Chapter 8)**_

_Deeks staggered forward. He managed to grab the stairs railing. Just as he turned to hit Tanevski with his left hand folded into a fist, Tanevski managed to back away and to prevent Deeks' blow. That made Deeks strike in empty space and it gave Tanevski the leverage he needed. He punched Deeks on the face. Deeks felt sharp pain in the left side of his face. He felt blood dripping from it. He lost his grip of the railing as he held his bleeding cheek. His right leg slipped._

…

* * *

Deeks lost his balance and fell down the stairs. He felt something crack during the fall. He wasn't sure if it was his body that cracked or it was the wooden stairs. He hit the wall with his head. He saw stars the moment he hit the wall. He tried to move his hands and to get up, but that didn't happen. Instead he stayed like glued on the floor. The first thing that came out of his mouth before he passed out was "Kensi".

Tanevski saw the detective roll over to the floor. He never wanted this to happen, but he wouldn't give up. He insisted on fighting and he needed to be punished. He put his hand on Deeks' neck to check his pulse. It was weak. He leaned his head to hear Deeks' breathing. It was shallow and steady. He thought of picking him up and disappear along with him and the weapons, but that's when he heard sirens approaching. He hit him few more times before he took off through the door that led to the garage.

…

* * *

Hope, Kensi and Sam split and each of them covered their part along with the SWAT team. Soon the LAPD received the call and they sent two patrol cars.

Hope covering the east entrance of the house along with Kensi, burst through the door. The door cracked loudly and Kensi opened her mouth in amusement at the force with which Hope kicked the door. Tomboy style. She reminded Kensi of herself once again. She found few common characteristics with the young woman that wanted to stay tough and acted like she was tough, when in fact she was fragile in nature.

Hope took the first door right and then the first left. There wasn't anyone in those rooms. In fact there was so much dust that Hope concluded no one entered in those rooms with years.

And now the million dollars question: How come arms dealer like Tanevski take care of his house on such a low level?

Kensi went on the left checking the bedroom and the bathroom. She found personal belongings on the counter. A tooth brush, a tooth paste, cologne, perfume, razor blade, soap and shiny golden Rolex. In the bedroom she found few expensive Armani suits, dozens of shirts and three pairs of shoes, also expensive. However, she didn't find a gun which they were sure Tanevski owned. The nine-mill he used to kill David Lucas.

Sam checked the perimeter around the house on the west side, and then kicked the back door. He checked every blind angle in the house, but there was no one hiding in the house. As he slowly approached the living room he noticed drag marks on the floor. He thought of a possible fight going on between Deeks and Tanevski. That's when he saw a pair of shoes.

Kensi was checking the desk drawer in Tanevski's bedroom hoping that she'll find the gun when she heard Sam screaming over the com "Officer down!" She got out of the room immediately and she found Sam kneeling beside Deeks' body. He wasn't moving. A tight knot formed in her stomach as she slowly approached Sam and Deeks.

And for the situation to be scarier than it was already, Hope screamed when she saw Deeks lying on the ground on his stomach. She noticed the red stain on his hair and that made the actual impression worse.

Sam took Hope by her shoulders to calm her down. "He's breathing." was all that he said. That seemed to take its effect and Hope finally calmed down. She was prepared to expect the worst, but she always hoped that Deeks will walk unharmed from all of this. Then she turned toward Kensi that let her guard down and was crying rivers praying Deeks to not leave her alone.

The paramedics arrived very soon and Hope, Kensi and Sam had to move aside to leave them to do their job. Hope wrapped her arms around Kensi and both of them cried in despair. Sam wanted to cry too, but he knew he won't do any good to both women with him crying. If they saw him cry, they might lose it. He already showed his feeling this afternoon when he waited for news about Callen, and he was careful not to do the same here.

The medic approached Deeks and checked his pulse. It was weak, 30-40 beats per minute. He carefully placed the neck protector and turned Deeks on his back. The other medic helped him to place Deeks on the stretcher. Sam saw Deeks' face and its mind flew back to Deeks' face after they were saved from that body shop. His lips were split and swollen. His left cheek was torn and had an inch long gap. Judging by the blow on the head he noticed earlier, Deeks probably had a concussion. He hadn't the slightest idea about the other injuries, but Deeks needed the time to recover. Sam sighed heavily as the paramedics took Deeks out of the house and into the ambulance.

Kensi followed them silently without uttering a word. Hope was afraid that Kensi will withdraw to herself now that Deeks was injured, and she screamed for help. But, Hope knew that she won't let anyone near her to help her. Kensi climbed in the ambulance and the ambulance left.

Sam followed the ambulance with the Challenger, while Hope stayed at the house to wait for the forensic team. Even if it wasn't a dead body they found, still the house needed to be processed. It was odd why she wouldn't go in the hospital, but they didn't know her story.

Hope sat on the doorstep and she inhaled deeply. She exhaled and cradled her head in her hands. She played the film she once watched, few years back when she lost someone she loved. As the memories haunted her, Tanevski waited in the garage for everyone to leave, so he can take off.

He checked outside and there wasn't any sign of people. And then it hit him like a rock. She was sitting on the doorstep and she was looking into the horizon. He recognized her immediately. How could he forget her face when he almost killed her? Yet, he killed someone that was with her. Now, it dawned on him that the Inspector from God knows where, was the same woman he once ran off on the streets of Bitola. She was there to bring justice for her and for him. Tanevski quickly returned to the garage and packed the weapons in the Escalade. He drove off.

Hope heard revving engine and she immediately jumped and cleared her thoughts. She drew out her weapon. She searched the perimeter around the house and she saw the garage door wide open, the Escalade gone. She aimed the gun to shoot at the car, but as the car's lights faded off in the night she lost her aim. She called Sam.

"Hey, I just heard a sound, and when I checked the garage door was open. Then I noticed the Escalade. Tanevski just slipped out of my hands."

"There wasn't a way to know he was still there Hope. We searched for him, we even looked there, but he wasn't in the garage."

"Then how…"

"I don't know. We'll find him Hope." Sam reassured her.

Hope ended the call and she once more let her thoughts drift to the place where she was in 2007.

…

* * *

Kensi held Deeks' hand in her hands and she prayed for him to open up his eyes. She was scared as hell when she saw his face. She counted a bruise on the side of the head, his cheek had an inch long gap, and his lips were split and swollen. He looked like he just got out of a fight with Rambo. The medic removed the jacket Hetty gave it to him carefully. Under it, Kensi spotted defensive wounds on his arms when his shirt was pulled. His left arm was broken from the fall through the stairs. He must've had other injuries, as well, but she couldn't see them right away. She stifled a scream when the medic pulled Deeks' t-shirt above his torso to check for other injuries. He had a large bruise on his left side and his stomach felt hard on touch.

"Internal bleeding." he said, as he checked Deeks' vitals.

Deeks' BP was low and his heart rate increased.

"He's losing blood and we need to get to the hospital fast!" the medic yelled.

"Speeding up!" came the answer of the driver.

Kensi found herself pleading so Deeks can stay with her. Too many people walked out of her life or died and she couldn't afford to lose her partner and boyfriend, per se. Not now, when they finally moved forward.

They arrived at the hospital. A standby trauma team waited for them in the ER. They took over the stretcher that held Deeks' body. The medics told them his situation and they left to another call of duty. Kensi walked beside the stretcher as the team rushed Deeks through the door that led to the operating room. There, they stopped her. Dr. John Gates spoke with a deep voice.

"Sorry Ma'am, but you are not allowed in that area. Wait here."

Kensi managed to say "Okay", but she was frustrated she was held back. And she was boiling inside.

"His blood type is AB Positive!" She yelled, as the doctor with salt-and-pepper hair vanished into the operation room.

She faced one of the hardest times in her life after her father's death and Jack's abandonment. She looked the death right into the eyes, while Deeks struggled for his life. If he died…

"Don't you even think about it Kens." She heard a familiar voice speaking behind her. She turned around to see Sam.

He took her in his arms and he held her like that for a few moments. Kensi let her emotions to surface. She cried in his shoulder, as Sam was stroking her hair.

…

Deeks was unconscious for more than half an hour when he was brought in the ER. He felt coldness and he tasted iron in his mouth. He thought it was from the blood he swallowed when Tanevski hit his lips, but that was on the outside. Then he felt sharp pain in his stomach and he felt sick. He wanted to throw up, but he couldn't stand up to do that. What he didn't know was that he wasn't conscious.

The doctors fought for his life on the table. He kept getting in shock and out of it. They had trouble to keep his pulse on a steady level. The hemorrhage was bad and they needed to stop the bleeding before they lost him right there.

And then it happened. His heart stopped.

…

* * *

_Deeks drove the red Malibu through a dark tunnel. He was driving for a few minutes now, and he couldn't see its end. Every now and then he would see pictures hanged on both sides of the tunnel. It started with him as a baby, then the pictures from his first birthday, when actually Gordon John Brandel smiled on one of them. He always wanted the people to call him John Gordon, not Gordon John. The pics went on and on and then Deeks saw a pic from his 6__th__ birthday. It was the day when it all started. Then he saw pictures of him beaten, his eyes swollen, his arm broken… Picture of the moment Gordon missed twice when he fired the shotgun. Deeks thought, who the hell took picture of this event?_

_The following pictures were related to Deeks living on the streets of LA for a few months before he found a place to live just before he turned 12. He managed to go to school and work at the same time. After two years and 24/7 school-work-home schedule, Deeks earned enough money for college. He finished elementary with straight A's and he went to Reseda High School. He didn't know anyone there, so he could come and go without the risk of being noticed and to be pointed out as the kid that got beaten by his dad, or the kid that shot his dad. _

_During the years he spent in the house of Gordon Brandel, he lost some weight. On the night it all happened he weighed barely 30 kilograms. He was tall and skinny. You could've counted every bone, because his skin was translucent and the bones peeked through it. He even had headaches and vomited a lot. He thought that was because of Gordon's treatment. After he abandoned his home, scratch that, Gordon's home, he gained weight and he changed looks. He always was a beautiful child with the ocean blue eyes and fluffy hair, but after he got out of that house, he was more beautiful than ever. Every girl in Reseda High had a crush on him, but he couldn't let anyone near him. He was too afraid to let someone in his life, let alone a girl. He built a shell around him and kept it that way for the most part of his life. Well, until he met Kensi. He had few brief relationships through the years, but the brunette took his heart the moment he saw her in that MMA gym._

_Next in line were the pictures of his graduation. Then the pics when he got the letter that informed him he'd been admitted to Law School. Then the struggle he had with college. His saved money vanished in the first semester and then he was forced to do all kinds of things for little money. The picture where he was as an exotic dancer made him flinch. That was one period of his life as a student that he wanted to forget. His graduation from Law School, his education at the Police Academy, his job at the Office of the Public Defender, all of it was perfectly framed on the walls. _

_Then there were all cases he worked on throughout his career. He smiled at the picture in the bar when Hetty offered him the job. _

_All in all, the tunnel was getting larger and larger as he moved forward with the Malibu. He asked himself why there weren't any other cars in the tunnel, and why it was full of pictures of him and his life. _

…

* * *

Doctor Gates was trying to do something to get Deeks back, but his heart just stopped, He tried every way of CPR, but that didn't help. He stared at the pale face of the detective that lay on his operating table and at the sight of him, his eyes filled with tears. He was a young man and he deserved to live. He forced himself to look at his watch and to declare the TOD.

"Patient's time of death, 10:30 p.m. 20th of January 2015."

…

* * *

_He stopped at the picture that presented his first meeting with Kensi. He touched the picture and it felt so vivid, like it happened yesterday. Next to it was hanged a frame that had video on it, instead of a photograph. It was their Christmas kiss._

_Deeks continued with his ride. He saw a bright spot in the center of the tunnel. As he sped up the spot enlarged and quickly became a big white circle that blinded Deeks. Some voice inside Deeks' head told him to pull over before he crossed the white circle. He did that and he managed to stop the Chevy Malibu an inch in front of the white circle. He got out of the car and looked in the circle. His eyes hurt from the whiteness of it._

_Deeks realized that he was in a way deciding his future on that road. He didn't know what lay in front of him beyond the white circle, but he knew what lay behind him, in the life he had till now. He chose his life and he entered the Malibu. As soon as he started the engine he realized that the white circle was the light on the end of the tunnel. _

…

* * *

Almost 5 hours passed since the doctors took Deeks in surgery. Kensi paced up and down the hallway clearly upset because no one was telling her how was he doing. Every now and then a nurse would come out of the operation room, but like always they got nothing to tell, except "The doctor will tell you everything you need to know when he's finished." Finally, at 11 p.m. doctor Gates showed up and all of them including, Hetty, Eric, and Nell surrounded the doctor with questions.

"Your colleague is fine. He pulled through the surgery, but his state is still critical. We need to wait 24 hours before I come up with a conclusion. He is in ICU and for now you can see him through the glass. I won't allow anyone near him for now."

Sam could tell that the doctor was holding something back from his face expression.

"Something happened during the surgery Doc?"

John Gates was stunned at how the big guy figured something was wrong from just one look at his face.

"His heart stopped on the table. He was dead for 15 minutes. But, we were able to save his life."

They all took their time to let the news lie down. The fact that Deeks actually died, and came back send shivers down their bodies.

"What about his injuries?"

"As you could all see his cheek was pretty badly injured, it actually took us 20 minutes to sew the wound. His left arm is broken in a few places. He has 3 fractured ribs. He knocked his head pretty bad in the wall during the fall and that led to concussion. We made CAT scan and x-ray, but everything is okay. He'll have headaches for a while, but that's normal for this type of injuries. We stopped the bleeding, but he lost a lot of blood, so he will be weak for some time. He needs a lots of rest and I want you to know that I'll keep him here until he is ready to walk out of that door by himself and he'll be cleared from active duty until I say otherwise."

"Thank you doctor."

Doctor Gates left the team in the hall.

They all sat down in the plastic chairs, except Hetty that was pacing up and down the hallway. She took Kensi's role at doing that. God knows what was in Hetty's mind when she stopped and she took out her cell phone. She dialed Hope's number. On the third ring she picked up.

"Hello Ms. Brandel."

"Hi, Hetty. What's up?"

"Mr. Deeks got out of surgery. I thought you would like to know that."

"Thanks Hetty." She said, sadness in her voice.

"Why didn't you come to the hospital Hope?"

Hope held her cell in her hands while hot tears streamed down her face, the pain of it all coming back again.

"Because the last time I was in a hospital, someone I cared about deeply died." she choked out on her tears before ending the call, letting out a strangled sob.

Hetty stood still for a moment before she came back to the hall.

"Ms. Jones, Mr. Beale, you can go home now. Same goes to you Ms. Blye and you Mr. Hanna."

"Night Hetty." Nell and Eric spoke at the same time.

"I'm not going anywhere Hetty." Kensi said determined.

"Ms. Blye, I think that Ms. Brandel will need you tonight. You can do much more for Mr. Deeks if you talk to her, than to stay here all night. You can come back in the morning. I will be here in case something happens."

"Okay." said Kensi, knowing that Hetty won't stop until she crossed the threshold and was out of the hospital. She hated to leave Deeks in the hospital, but she had to admit that Hetty was right.

"I'll go check on G, before I go home Hetty."

'Good."

…

* * *

After all of them were gone, Hetty sat in one of the chairs and she let her mind drift to the moment when she first noticed the blue eyed blonde detective. Many years before he even knew she was there. She was well known between the cops as the little ninja savior, because she saved their asses more than one time.

One day when she left Lt. Bates' office she noticed the shaggy detective. He wore black leather jacket, green tee and well-worn jeans. His hair was unruly like he never put a comb through it. He left his badge and the gun on his desk and he started writing the daily report. The day was rainy and she could see that detective Deeks was like the weather, moody.

She knew from Bates' words that he just got back from an undercover assignment that didn't play well. His predecessor, Mark Soriano had called off the op that was supposed to take down a chain of illegal arms dealing. He quit not long after that, and Bates took over his place. He was Deeks' new supervisor and he liked the kid very much from the beginning.

The day was January 8th 2007.

…


	10. Rise and Shine Mister Deeks

**Chapter 10-Rise and Shine Mister Deeks**

* * *

Hetty always had a thing for people that were hurt somehow in life. All of her agents that she collected throughout the years had some trauma they experienced as a child.

Agent Callen became an orphan early in life and he spent most of his childhood running away from foster homes. God knows that Hetty wanted to adopt him, but those were the years she was involved in dangerous ops and she wasn't sure if she would make it alive out of them. That's why she made sure that he'll stay with good families.

Agent Callen's partner, agent Hanna had some tough childhood too, but that wasn't through beating, like Mr. Deeks', but through poverty. Sam learned the hard way very young, so he saved every penny that he could for his kids' future. At one point of life some little ninja found Sam's father job at the Marines, which job he lost unfortunately few years before.

Agent Blye lost her father at the age of 15, and she lived like a homeless person for a year.

And finally detective Deeks was the one of the many people that she recruited that had horrible childhood. His father beat the crap out of him and he was emotionally scarred because of that.

That January 8th in 2007 it was Mr. Deeks' 28th birthday, but he didn't seem like the person that will get attention for his birthday. She asked Lt. Bates to give her Deeks' file. He knew that Hetty had something in mind, but he couldn't figure out what.

As Hetty sat in Lt. Bates' office reading all the facts written about Mr. Deeks, she realized that he was a survivor and that he deserved better than he already had.

She watched him writing that report, the way he held the pen in his hand, his posture, how he grimaced when his hand trembled… All of that showed her how much self-doubtful Mr. Deeks was.

She took paper from Bates' desk and she scribbled something on it. She used the opportunity when Deeks went to the men's room and she left the paper on his desk. She quickly left; already planning how would an LAPD detective fit in an NCIS elite team. She never thought that he'll join her task force at the expense of a missing agent, but he proved to be a great asset throughout the years. She didn't make a mistake like she had with few of the agents in the past. And for the irony to be bigger, he wasn't even an agent.

When Deeks came back the first thing he noticed was the paper someone left above the report he was writing. He took the paper in his hands and read the words that were written in neat handwriting.

"_Happy birthday detective Deeks and have a nice day. Many people will wish you luck, but I wish you to be better at what you do and don't forget to smile always. Because the smile will heal all the wounds you have on the inside. So, rise and shine Mister Deeks. Rise and shine. _

_H. L."_

He wondered whose initials were these HL and who would wish him happy birthday when he was sure no one even remembered it. He saved that paper just in case he sometimes found out who the mysterious man or woman was to say thanks, because no one ever had the descents to wish him something like that for his birthday.

He actually smiled that day, after a long time of darkness.

…

* * *

Hetty's thoughts were interrupted when she heard someone call her name.

"Hetty?"

"Yes, Ms. Deeks."

"How is he?"

"He is in ICU. The doctor said that he will have to wait 24 hours before he could clear him. But, he'll be fine, I'm sure. He is a fighter."

Christine sat on the chair beside Hetty. Both women looked at each other for a moment without uttering a word.

"Can I see him?"

"For now the doctor said that we can see him through the glass. He won't let anyone inside till Mr. Deeks is out of the woods."

"Okay."

Hetty and Christine went together to the ICU. Christine touched the glass trying to tell her son that she was there for him even when he couldn't hear her or see her. At one point Hetty's phone buzzed. She saw the message and she left Christine alone for a moment.

"Owen."

"Henrietta."

"What are you doing here Owen? I thought that you weren't to come back for another two weeks."

"Screw Washington Henrietta. That case wasn't so important and I can't leave you all alone, especially now, when two of our agents are down."

It was weird to hear the word agent referring to Deeks, from Granger's mouth.

"How are they?"

"Well, Mr. Callen is wide awake and he is lamenting about the food. He wants to go back to the field already. And Mr. Deeks is in ICU."

She briefed him on the situation.

"Why didn't you just call me to come back to LA Henrietta?"

"I thought I could handle it myself Owen. I'm a big girl."

A smile formed on Granger's face when they heard footsteps approaching.

Christine came to the hall looking for Hetty and when she saw Owen her mouth formed a little "O".

"Owen?"

"Christine? What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same question."

"I'm the Assistant Director of the Office of Special Projects. I work with Henrietta."

"You work for the NCIS?"

"Yes."

Hetty cleared her throat. "Wait a minute, you two know each other?"

"Yes. Owen and Rocky know each other from the old days. Rocky is my second husband. And, to answer your question Owen, I'm here to see my son.

Granger's face became a huge question mark.

"Your son?"

"Yes, my son."

"Deeks is your son?"

"Yes, he is."

"I thought that you didn't have kids."

"He is my estranged son Owen. He left home at the age of 11."

Clearly Granger didn't know Deeks' past, because he had a confused look on his face.

"You completely lost me. Tell me everything from the beginning."

Christine laid out all of the things that happened with Gordon till the day Marty shot his father. Granger heard all of the horrific things Marty experienced through his childhood.

"Don't tell me. So, Deeks is your son. The same that shot his father at the age of 11 in self-defense, and then left home. He took a law degree and graduated from the Police Academy top from his class."

"That's him."

"The world is a small place." Said Granger, still not believing what he heard.

"I guess it is." Said Christine.

"I think that we should go to the cafeteria and get some refreshers. Owen, Christine…"

Hetty led the path. You couldn't say no to Henrietta Lange and get away with it.

…

* * *

Kensi took a cab from the hospital parking lot, since her Caddy was left in West Hollywood. She went to Deeks' apartment. All the lights were turned off. She worried about Hope and telling from Hetty's voice, she was worried too. She carefully unlocked the door of Deeks' apartment and entered on tiptoes. She wasn't sure if Hope was there, but a sec later she saw a silhouette in the darkness clutching a pillow to her chest and gazing in the distance. Kensi opened her mouth to say something, but Hope cut her off.

"Don't turn the lights on Kensi." She said.

"Okay, I won't."

Kensi approached Hope and sat on the couch beside her. She was afraid to say something that will do something to Hope. She already got emotional, but she wasn't sure if it was for Deeks or for something else… personal.

"I'm worried about you Hope. Actually, everybody is."

Kensi let the silence to creep up as she kept staring in Hope in the darkness of the apartment on 1894 Parkson Avenue.

"Hetty said that you may need me tonight. You know why she said that?"

Hope continued with the silence. She thought about the event that changed her life in 2007. She couldn't find the words how to tell Kensi about it. She wasn't sure that she wanted anyone to know that, but she felt like she had to tell someone and release the burden that felt so heavy on her back for 8 years.

Kensi started leaving when Hope spoke. Well, it was more like a whisper, but still.

"Do you have demons Kensi?"

Hope's question caught Kensi off guard. She came closer to Hope, now staring directly in Hope's chocolate brown eyes that were filled with tears.

"Yes, I have. From time to time."

"Well, my demon is still out there, alive and breathing, while my cousin lies in that hospital bed, fighting for his life."

Kensi couldn't understand what Hope meant to say with the demon thing, but as she continued with her story, Kensi understood everything.

"It all started in 2007. I walked out of my workplace with my other half…"

She continued on and on about how they both experienced hit-and-run, but he died, and she lived. She described every single detail of that day like it was yesterday. Kensi understood Hope's reason for coming to LA to chase Tanevski and all of a sudden it all made sense.

"After he died, I couldn't bear to watch anyone that was stuck in a hospital bed. My husband died in the hospital after the doctors' attempts to keep him in life. That's why I couldn't come to the hospital."

Kensi wrapped her arms around Hope and she let her tears fall. Both women cried as the darkness slowly gave away and the first signs of sun light appeared. Kensi called Hetty to ask her if something changed in Deeks' state, but she reassured her that nothing's changed. Kensi told Hetty about the night spent with Hope and that both of them needed some sleep before they came to the hospital. Hetty said they should take all the time in the world for rest, considering they've been up more than 20 hours. She promised that she'll call Kensi the moment Deeks wakes up.

Hope drifted away while Kensi spoke on the phone Kensi took a blanket and covered her. Kensi allowed herself to sleep as she managed to pull the covers up to her chin. Suddenly she felt cold. She felt alone and lost as Deeks was in the hospital bed and she was in his.

But, she let her thoughts to go to a better place. The place where it all started. The last thing she saw before she fell asleep was a picture of her and Deeks together taken few weeks before they got the case. He was grinning from ear to ear and that was the way she wanted to remember Deeks. She knew that for the last month Deeks was out of his comfort zone and that was what scared her the most.

…

* * *

Besides the characteristic lone wolf, agent G. Callen had the characteristic stubborn. Few hours after he was shot he already wanted to get back to work. Hetty went to visit him and before she had the chance to talk to him, he complained about why the doctor wouldn't get him clearance.

She stood up and spoke in deep voice. "Mr. Callen, just shut up for a minute." He stopped immediately and listened to what the little ninja had to tell him. She explained the situation that Deeks was abducted and that it was possible that Tanevski had him. Callen felt his lungs burning as he tried to get up and pull on his clothes. That's when Sam Hanna entered and crossed his arms over his chest. When Callen saw the deadly look on Sam's face he sat back on the bed and pulled the covers up. Hetty and Sam left, leaving Callen to gather his thoughts. Callen used that time to rethink all the angles of the operation and who could've possibly tell Tanevski about the meeting. Then he realized that Tanevski set them up. Now, from this angle Callen wished that he heard Deeks' pleads, when he said that they could be walking into a trap.

Later that night Sam came to his room and they had a large conversation. He told him that Deeks was been found and that he was on ICU. Callen felt relief when he heard the good news.

"Glad to hear that Sam. He suffered enough."

"Yeah, I know." (Pause) "G, do you have a feeling that sometimes you do everything right, and still you feel like you failed?"

"Every single day Sam. Every single day."

"I feel like I've failed you and Deeks today."

"I feel like I've failed all of you Sam. Not just Deeks. I am the team leader and I pushed the matter forward. I didn't hear what Deeks was saying. And I drove us both into a trap. It's not important if he was the one that wanted to reactivate his alias, it's important that I allowed that to happen."

Callen stopped for a minute letting his words hang in the air a little before he continued.

"I thought about the first time Deeks worked with us and I kept thinking about his enthusiasm and the way he talked. He was happy about life and he never let his demons rule him. But, in the last month the man I've known for almost five years, darkened in a ways I can't explain to myself. I think that Max Gentry has taken a great deal of Deeks' father characteristics. I know that every one of us has a dark side, but with him it's different."

Sam listened to his partner and friend and nodded, knowing deep inside that G was totally right about that.

"And now because I hadn't the slightest idea what would happen, I let him be Max Gentry. I let him become dark and senseless. I let him dive."

There were tears in Callen's eyes now as he talked about the man he thought he would never like or trust.

"Stop beating yourself up, G. It wasn't your entire fault. All of us have fault in this. You are not alone. And about Deeks, I'm sure as hell that he'll walk out of this and he'll be again that annoying shaggy surfer we know. I think that he needed this one op to prove something to himself."

"Yeah, but you saw him after Sidorov's torture. He never returned our phone calls; he closed himself in his apartment. He wouldn't let us help him. And with the months coming and going, he even tried to harm himself. He bought a motorcycle, he didn't shot a suspect when he pulled out a gun claiming it would be overkill if he pulled the trigger, since we all put a bullet in him. He even tortured the blind man that we later traded for Kensi."

"He did what?"

"He didn't tell me that, of course. I found out over a conversation with the agent that was with him during the interrogation. He said that the man that was in front of him went crazy when he saw the picture of his dead partner."

"He wouldn't let us help him G. The only one he let in his life was Kensi, and even she doesn't know everything about him."

"He is a different man. In one year he went through hell, and I think that his scars didn't heal properly. Now, some old wounds were reopened and he'll need us to overcome this."

Callen's blue eyes locked with Sam's brown and they both understood what the other one meant.

"Okay G, I should probably go home now. Michelle called three times to ask where I was and I think I owe her an explanation about what happened today."

"Night big guy."

"Night G."

Sam closed the door from Callen's room and he started leaving when he noticed Granger, Hetty and a blonde woman sitting in the cafeteria and talking. He caught only the side looks, but her facial features were so similar with Deeks'. He approached them and both Hetty and Granger looked like they've seen a ghost.

"Granger. What's bringing you to LA?"

"I couldn't let my men finish this operation alone."

Sam was still intrigued with the blonde woman. She seemed surprised, though.

"Agent Sam Hanna, NCIS."

Christine shook the hand of the big guy that stood in front of her, not knowing what to say."

"Christine… Christine Deeks."

Sam's face turned into a question mark when he heard the blonde woman's last name.

"Deeks as in Marty Deeks?"

"Yes, I'm his mother."

Sam's jaw dropped open (to the floor).

"What?"

"You are not the only one that had that reaction agent Hanna."

"Call me Sam."

"Mr. Hanna, sit down. Do you want some coffee?"

"I intended to go home, but I can't turn off a good story over a cup of coffee."

Sam grinned as he sat down, and Christine relaxed a little when she saw his smile. She figured he was a friend of her son and she was eager to get to know him well through his friends' words.

They stayed little over 3 a.m. and when Sam got back home, he found Michelle pissed off with a pan in her hand, ready to whack his head.

"Darling… Sweetie… What's wrong?"

"What's wrong?! Sam Hanna, you think that you can hide the news from me and get away with it? No, Sir!"

"What news?"

"You haven't seen the TV news, have you?"

"No, what should I've seen baby?"

"Deeks has been kidnapped and few hours later found in grave danger. His kidnapper escaped."

Sam thought, _how did the reporters get to the news so fast?_

"Sit down. I will tell you everything from the beginning."

…

* * *

21st of January 2015

Hetty stayed in the hospital the whole day and her body ached when she tried to walk in the hallway in an effort to chase the sleep off her eyes and to flex her muscles. She drank a gallon of coffee, and she felt the caffeine kick in. She spent the whole day counting the 24 hour frame doctor Gates gave, as it slowly came to its end.

She waited patiently for him to get out of ICU and tell her the news. Hetty felt her body go numb at the thought of the sleepless night and the day she spent in the hospital pacing up and down the hallway, like lion in the cage in the city ZOO. She was aware that she wasn't young anymore and that she needed rest more than usual. But, the stubborn Henrietta Lange couldn't let herself sleep while one of her children was in danger.

Doctor Gates checked Deeks' vitals and they were good. His blood pressure and heart beats were normal and he started the process to wake him up from the anesthesia. He ordered a nurse to move the patient in a separate room.

"Ms. Lange?"

"Yes?"

"I can officially announce that Mr. Deeks is out of danger. He should wake up in the next hour or so. He was transferred in room 302. You can see him if you want that."

"That's good news. Thank you doctor."

Hetty called Kensi first thing when she heard the good news and she promised to be there in 20 minutes along with Hope. Next, Hetty called Sam. Then she called Nell and she told Eric and Nate. They all left what they were doing and went to the hospital.

Half an hour later in the room were gathered Kensi, Hope, Hetty, Sam, Michelle, Nell, Eric, Nate, Joelle and Callen that opposed to any objections for him to stay in bed. They all waited for Deeks to wake up. Even Granger came.

Deeks slowly opened his eyes and saw all of his coworkers and friends surrounding him. He needed few seconds to adjust his eyes to the light, but he could clearly see them all there waiting for him to come back. He knew at that moment that they were indeed his family.

He heard Hetty's dulcet voice.

"Rise and shine Mister Deeks. Rise and shine."

…


	11. For All the Right Reasons

**Chapter 11-For All the Right Reasons**

* * *

**The lyrics belong to their authors, respectively.**

* * *

"So it was you after all." Said Deeks, grinning.

"I'm afraid you already know the answer, Mr. Deeks." Said Hetty.

"What is that you two are talking about?" asked Callen "I'm the team leader, I have to know."

Deeks chuckled at the thought of his birthday, 8 years ago.

"The thing is, Hetty left me a note for my birthday in 2007. She signed it with HL, and for many years now, I wondered who the person that wished me happy birthday is. I suspected it was Hetty for some time, but I never had a chance to really verify that. When she said "Rise and shine Mister Deeks", I recalled that the anonymous person wrote the same thing in the note."

"I think that Hetty had the eye on you since 2007, Deeks." Said Sam "And believe me, she observed all the other agents that joined the NCIS, including me."

"She has a knack for blonde surfers." Said Kensi, smirk forming on her face.

"Okay, okay, stop it you two." Said Hetty "Although, you are right. I admit that I wanted Mr. Deeks on my team long before he joined."

Deeks felt happy to have his friends at his side and that everyone watched out for him.

"Thank you guys."

"For what Deeks?"

"For being here for me. I know that I did some things that I didn't like, that might've hurt you, but either way you stayed with me all the way. You didn't leave me, like it happened in my past like with some colleagues in the LAPD."

Callen was struck by the emotions in Deeks' voice and that competed the picture Callen had for Deeks. He knew that some of his former colleagues despised him, but he hadn't the slightest idea that they left him alone in the line of duty. Instead of having his back, they left him to the wolves. Deeks' life was surrounded with roughness and hate, that Callen was surprised how Deeks managed to be happy and smile all the time. Now he knew.

"You don't have to thank us Deeks." Said Callen "We are sworn to protect and serve, but first and foremost for us is the safety of our agents. We watch our backs, but we also watch the back of our colleagues and friends. And I speak on behalf of all of us, not just you."

Callen's words touched Deeks deeply. He never thought that he'll hear Callen to refer him as an agent.

"I think that we should leave Mr. Deeks alone." Said Hetty "He suffered enough and he needs rest and sleep. I don't think he had enough sleep these past few weeks."

"I want to talk to Kensi." Said Deeks.

"Okay, Ms. Blye will stay, and the rest of you, there's the door."

Hetty slowly walked to the door.

The room emptied and Kensi and Deeks were left alone.

"Hey Fern."

"Hey Max."

"How've you been Fern?"

"How've you been Max?" They spoke in unison.

"I've seen better days."

"Mhm. Is there something that I should know?"

"I don't think so."

"Hey, Deeks sorry I couldn't have your back at the Marina."

"You don't have to apologize Kens. I know that I hadn't any chances against Ruiz and Tanevski. They had a plan, and if you tried to do something you could've been hurt, too."

"Do you hurt?"

"My whole body hurts, but it will pass. The wounds on the inside is what I'm worried about Kens. I'm afraid they'll eat me alive."

Kensi was surprised at how open was Deeks. He had poor communication skills for sure, but she saw a change in him, admitting finally what's bothering him.

"I know what you think Deeks, and believe me they will heal. Give them time."

"I always give them time Kens, but when I think they are healed, they reopen again. It's like the past makes conspiracy against me."

"Everything will come to an end Deeks."

"I know."

"And I'll be there for you every step on the way Deeks. Even when you can't see me."

Deeks remembered the time he told her those same words, and smiled. But, that wasn't a real smile because it didn't reach his eyes. He had lost the spark in his eyes. Kensi noticed that there was something else that happened in that house on North Sierra Bonita Avenue. The way he put his shaky hand in his hair, set off alarms in Kensi's head.

"Do you want to tell me what happened when you were held captive Marty?"

Deeks looked at his chest and started shaking. Kensi touched him lightly on the hand, as to stop the shaking, but he jerked away.

"It will help you, if you talk."

She heard him sobbing and she shivered as she wiped the tears off his cheeks.

"Hey, I didn't mean to upset you. Here calm down."

Kensi sat on the bed and Deeks leaned his head on her shoulder. She gently took him in her arms and rocked him until he calmed down. He hissed as he tried to get up.

"Where are you going?"

"I want to go to the bathroom."

The moment Deeks stepped on the floor he felt dizziness. He gripped the railing of the bed tight, and he closed his eyes as he tried to awash the pain. He gripped the railing so tight that his knuckles whitened.

"Let me help you." Said Kensi.

She helped him to the bathroom. He locked the door and stayed in there for a long time. He splashed his face with water and looked himself in the mirror. When he saw the bruise he had on the left eye and the stitches on his left cheek he remembered a long forgotten day with his father. He closed his eyes and he touched his cheek, as the memories from his childhood flooded in his mind like the Rio Bravo River.

…

* * *

**-1988-**

Gordon John Brandel sat in the bar the whole day and he drank whiskey. It was his daily routine when he wasn't working. Well, even if he was working, he drank, but he was careful not to drink too much. Funny, how a man with his habits could hold a job for a longer time.

Marty pulled on a sweater with long sleeves and his jacket. His legs hurt from the "altercation" he got last night with his father, but he managed to go to school with his new bike. The man was an abuser, but when it came to presents, Marty always got what he wanted. Well, almost everything. The only thing he wasn't allowed to have was pet. And Gordon John Brandel made clear the statement that day.

On the way back from school Marty found a beautiful dog. It was Golden Retriever puppy. He took it with him. But, he sensed the trouble before he crossed the threshold.

His father was already drunk and he stumbled every few feet. The dog sensed something was wrong and barked. When Gordon heard the barking he twisted his head in a weird way, and headed for the dog. The dog stood perfectly still barking louder and louder. Marty froze in place. He choked one shy "run" when his father grabbed the dog by the neck. He took his neck in his hands and squeezed it so hard that the dog didn't stand a chance. The dog dropped dead in front of Marty's feet. He couldn't move. He felt Gordon's breath on his neck as he took him by the throat. Marty tried to run, but he stumbled on a stone and he fell on the ground. He felt blood streak from his nose. The next moment Gordon kicked him so hard on the legs that his head hurt. He grabbed him by his hair and pulled him till they entered the house.

Gordon fixed his eyes on Marty's eyes and kicked Marty in the lower abdomen while he still had him by his hair with the other hand. That made Marty throw up his lunch. He clutched his hands on his stomach and he leaned on the floor hissing. He wouldn't let Gordon to feel proud that he had a chance to break him.

Marty breathed heavily. He hadn't idea how long it passed since Gordon left, but he got up and slumped on the couch in pains. He managed to close his eyes and sleep a little.

The next thing he knew was that Gordon splashed him with water. His body protested as he got up suddenly, but he quickly felt Gordon's hands pulling his sweater up in his hands. He struggled to keep the sweater on, but he lost the battle when Gordon hit him hard in the left side of the face.

He knew what was next when Gordon pulled his pants low on the ankles. He took out the belt from his pants and started beating Marty. Blood streaked from everywhere and soon Marty couldn't breathe. He crawled on the floor as he searched for an object that might hold his weight as he tried to stand up, but got caught by Gordon. He took him in his room and left him there. Marty could still feel the alcohol in his breath.

By the age of 9, Marty Brandel knew the basics of first aid and he knew how to cure his wounds. He wouldn't let anyone near him. He wanted to show them that he was strong.

His whole body ached and he felt few cracked ribs under his touch. He could still feel the blows and kicks mixed with the belt on his skin. He crawled to the closet and he pulled out a pair of jeans and his favorite black sweatshirt. He took underwear and socks from the drawer, and slowly entered the bathroom. He let the shower on and he washed his wounds crying out loud every time he touched one of them. After he dried, he put on his underwear and took the first aid kit. He disinfected the wounds and he tried to close them as best as he could.

Then, he pulled on his jeans and the sweatshirt. For a brief moment he stopped breathing hearing nothing, but the silence. There was no one home and he took his jacket. Before he left the house, he briefly looked himself in the mirror, noticing how swelled his left cheek was. Then he got out.

…

* * *

He felt like that time when he was 9 years old. Lost in his thoughts he didn't hear Kensi calling him out. He said "I'm coming" and unlocked the door. Kensi grabbed his shaky hand as he opened the door, and he fought hard not to fall down as he stepped out of the bathroom. His head hurt and his heart thumped so loud he thought that Kensi could hear it. He felt bitterness in his mouth, but he couldn't tell if it was from the concussion, or from the memory.

"You okay Deeks?" Kensi asked worry clear in her voice.

"No, I'm not okay." He said admitting for the first time what he really felt.

Kensi helped him to lie down on the bed and she pulled the covers, adjusting them as she noticed how hard Deeks' moves were. He hurt and she didn't like it when her man hurt.

Kensi placed a kiss on Deeks' forehead and she left the room.

Deeks hummed the lyrics from One Republic's song "All Fall Down" as he went to sleep. He needed rest.

_Step out the door and it feels like rain__  
__That's the sound (that's the sound) on your window pane__  
__Take to the streets but you can't ignore__  
__That's the sound (that's the sound) you're waiting for__…_

…_Whenever your world starts crashing down__  
__That's whe__n__ you'll find me__…_

…_We just can't get it right__  
__But we're on the road__…_

_Lost till you're found__  
__Swim till you drown_

_Know that we all fall down__  
__Love till you hate__  
__Strong till you break__  
__Know that we all fall down__…_

…

* * *

Kristijan Tanevski took off with Ruiz's Escalade and the weapons into the night. It was already dusk and he felt he went out of time when he saw the woman approach the garage. He needed to throw away the SUV quickly, so he made a stop first at a gas station. He filled the tank to the bottom, and he bought food and few burn phones. The first phone call went to a friend of his that owned a car sales shop. The second phone call went to the buyer of the weapons. He already had an agreement with a certain person.

But, the NCIS team, especially Deeks hadn't the slightest idea what info Tanevski had on them, especially on someone's best friend that was in witness protection somewhere. He knew that the documents were sealed, but he had access to a tech operator (to whom the third phone call went) that managed to open them. He decided to lay low for a few days so the search for him will stop. In that time he made the plans how to approach Ray Martindale and how to draw the attention of the detective.

Kristijan Tanevski considered the debt that detective Marty Deeks had with him, unpaid.

"You will pay detective. Just wait until I regain my strength."

Tanevski's vendetta, as he wanted to call it, was for all the right reasons.

…


	12. Atonement Part 1-Out of the Blue

**Chapter 12-Atonement**

* * *

**Part 1-Out of the Blue**

* * *

Deeks slept most of the time and when he was awake his mind went to places that he didn't want to go. The horrific images showed up in front of his eyes and he shut them by trying to think of lighter moments. He had a lot of time to rest and he started to feel like he was in a prison, trapped in four walls and laying down on the bed most of the time. He needed to move, to feel alive again. He missed riding the motorcycle and he missed surfing. He hadn't surfed for almost two months, but he knew that if he did that, he may lose the grounds with Max Gentry.

He spent one week in the hospital when the doctor announced he may go home in the afternoon, but with a strict order: no field work for him in the next month. He felt angry about that, but he knew that he could make himself worse than he is now. He started piling clothes in the duffel bag. Just when he thought no one was going to get him, Hetty and Granger appeared on the door.

"Well, Mr. Deeks I can see that you are feeling better."

"I'm far from better Hetty, but I'll handle that."

Hetty smiled and tapped Deeks on the arm, as Granger took the duffel bag.

"You know that I can carry that by myself right?"

"I know Deeks, but from now on until you're cleared for field work, the heaviest thing you'll carry is a file on Henrietta's desk. And besides that I have a few book titles that you might wanna read while you recover at home. Am I clear?"

"Yes, Assistant Director."

Deeks looked at Hetty with a confused look. He whispered in her ear so Granger won't hear him. "Hetty did Granger hit his head after I've been admitted to the hospital?"

"Not that I know of, no Mr. Deeks." She answered with a smirk on her face.

"I mean, Granger and books? The only thing I thought he read was the Constitution of the United States of America from 1787."

"You'd be surprised at what kind of books Owen reads, Mr. Deeks."

"Don't tell me he read "Fifty Shades of Grey"?"

"All three of them Mr. Deeks. All three of them."

…

* * *

Granger took Deeks to his apartment and stayed with him.

"Where's Kensi?"

"Agent Blye is in the field with the rest of the team. They'll join us later today. Henrietta suggested that you might use some company. And she sent me."

"Hetty never suggests Granger. Hetty orders."

Granger laughed at that and Deeks raised his eyebrow in surprise.

"I'll go in my room. If you need anything there's the kitchen."

"I'll make some coffee."

"Good."

Deeks went to his room and left the bag on his bed. He quickly stripped off his clothes and showered. He almost jumped out when he saw Granger standing in the center of the room.

"Geez Granger, you went to "Spook School" or something?"

"I just wanted to say that the coffee is ready. I didn't know you were in the shower."

Granger looked at the bruises that covered Deeks' torso and the scar from the surgery. Deeks absentmindedly touched the scar.

"What?"

"Nothing. I was just thinking about something that… never mind. I'll wait for you in the living room."

"Okay."

Deeks could clearly see something was off with Granger. He quickly dressed in jeans and a blue tee and grey hoodie. He took the mug with the hot coffee in his hands and observed Granger form the kitchen counter. Granger suddenly looked at him and he realized that the detective won't let that matter float in the water. He was a detective and his job was to detect.

"You remind me of my son Deeks." Granger said more to himself, than to Deeks. "He was just like you. He knew how to make me smile, he was a surfer and he always found the good in people."

"What happened to him?"

"He was killed freshman year of college."

"I'm sorry man."

Granger could see that Deeks nodded his head, compassion written on his face.

"One day we fought. I can't remember what the fight was about, but the next thing I knew was that he was dead."

"You don't have to do this if it's tough on you Granger."

"I left those feelings a long time ago Deeks."

Deeks nodded for Granger to go on.

"One day, his second week at UCLA, he was jumped out and stabbed repeatedly. In a broad daylight."

"Did they catch his killer?"

"Nope. The police investigated it for some time, but the cases piled up, so the trail went cold."

"Were there any evidence that may have led to his killer?"

"Yes, there were few clues, but no match in AFIS. There was a fingerprint on the blade handle, and some fibers that belonged to a scarf of some sort. There was footage from the traffic cam nearby, but there wasn't any clear image of the killer."

"If you want me to help you out with the case, just say the word. I know how to keep the things on the down flow."

"The first time I saw you, you reminded me of him. I was angry at myself for letting my guard down and that's why I was so heavy on you. I couldn't let you crawl under my skin. I was harsh with you and I'm sorry if I have ever hurt you or your feelings. Now you know why I behaved like that."

Deeks sat on the couch and patted Granger on the shoulder. He was glad that finally Granger was having his back, too.

"You should sleep a little Deeks. You need rest, and besides you look like crap."

"Thanks."

Deeks' yawn agreed with Granger's statement and he headed for the bedroom.

"And Deeks?"

"Huh?"

"I'll send you the file and all the other materials that you'll need for the case."

"Thanks man. I'll be more than happy to help."

'No Deeks. Thank you. And don't say anything to the others unless you have a good reason for that."

"Roger that Granger."

Deeks pulled the covers up to his chin and fell into deep sleep.

…

* * *

**-March 2015-**

The next month went by very quickly. February turned into March. Both Deeks and Callen healed properly and were back to work. Deeks was destined to paperwork for few more weeks, so he had more time to investigate the case of the murder of Granger's son. He didn't tell the others as promised. Tanevski was nowhere to be found, but they kept searching for him. General Novack was still not talking and Marcos Ruiz hadn't the slightest idea what would Tanevski do, or where would he go.

He looked at the footage of the kill thousand times, but he couldn't make out who the killer was. He read the reports, the file on the case (which was thin) and after a month he didn't have a clue. But, he was determined to find out who that bastard was.

Deeks finished his daily report and he started leaving when he felt Sam's hand on his arm.

"You have a moment Deeks?"

"Sure Sam."

"I noticed how much you changed this month. After you got out of the hospital you are different. Something's bothering you and I want to know what it is."

"Sam… You know that I won't sleep well until Tanevski is out there planning his next move."

"What I meant Deeks was that something's bothering you other than Tanevski."

"That's Deeks' business agent Hanna. He will tell you when the time has come for that."

Sam had a questioning look on his face, while Deeks lowered his head, never speaking.

"We'll talk." He said anger in his voice.

Deeks exhaled and he almost cried at the brief moment he shared with Sam that was interrupted by secrets that lay in-between them. Deeks felt that he became too much emotional since the case was presented to them in the cold December morning.

"You have something new?" Granger's question pulled him back to reality.

"Nothing new." Deeks replied. "I'll go over it again once I'm home."

"Don't beat yourself up Deeks. If you can't find anything that's fine by me. I spent too much time trying to solve it myself; I won't blame you if you can't."

"Night Granger."

"Night Deeks."

Deeks was so tired that he slumped on the couch in the living room and nodded off until a sound of crushing plate woke him up. He heard Hope curse under her breath.

"Son-of-a-bitch! I told you not to make any sound. My cousin is asleep."

"Not anymore."

Deeks startled her and the mug in her hands slipped and shattered on the floor to million pieces.

"Shit!"

"You know, you shouldn't do anything when you are nervous."

"I'm not nervous!"

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Everything is wrong. Tanevski is still out there. Ruiz and Novack won't talk. There's just too many paperwork these days… And besides that, I'm in my monthly period."

"I get it Hopes." Deeks said "Leave the plate and the mug, I'll gather the pieces in the morning. Here, come with me."

Deeks took Hope by the hand and both of them sat on the couch.

"What's going on with you Marty?" Hope asked.

"I think that is the most asked question these days." Deeks' laugh sounded more like a grunt.

"Marty, you are avoiding my question."

"I forgot how observant you can be Hopes."

She smiled at him, but she knew that he wasn't an easy man to convince him to talk.

"Now, you better start talking before I lose my temper."

"I promised that I won't say anything until I found who killed… Never mind, I already told you too much."

"I know how to keep a secret Marty."

"Well, you know what Benjamin Franklin wrote "Three can keep a secret if two of them are dead." So, Granger knows, I know and if I tell you, you will be the third in the row, which means you and I should be dead because we know the secret."

"So, you are counting me in?" asked Hope. And then "Why did you mention Granger? Is something, wrong with the man or?"

Hope had a quizzical look on her face and at that moment Deeks realized he can't hold to himself for much longer.

"Raise your right hand Hopes." Said Deeks, dead serious.

"Okay." Hope raised her hand.

"Now, repeat after me. I, Hope Brandel…"

"I, Hope Brandel…"

"Swear to the court…"

"Swear to the court…"

"That I will keep the secret…"

"That I will keep the secret…"

"Until I've been told otherwise."

"Until I've been told otherwise."

When Hope realized that she was ranting an oath that Deeks thought of just seconds ago, she laughed out loud and Deeks joined her in.

"Let's get to the point Hopes." Deeks' face grew serious. "Granger's son was killed in October 2006. We talked a little a month ago and he told me about the case. Since then I investigate the murder. I promised him that I won't tell anyone, unless it's necessary." Deeks exhaled, as Hope nodded in understanding.

"Tell me what you got so far. I may be able to help you. And I won't tell the others, I promise. Plus a fresh pair of eyes won't hurt."

"Okay."

Deeks took out his laptop and the file and he began laying the facts about the case. He also wrote notes about the things he thought were important about the case, and the aspects he thought that the detectives should've investigated. By 11 p.m. Hope knew all of the important stuff about the murder of Alden Granger. The final touch was the footage that contained the murder, but there was no clear shot of the killer's face. He wore black tee shirt, black jeans. His jacket was on the concrete and she noticed a black scarf and a baseball cap. He was tall close to 6 foot 2 inches and his body was all solid muscles. She could see streaks of black hair with major amount of white in between. She concluded that the man at the time was roughly in his mid-forties. He had a tattoo on his right bicep, but she couldn't recognize the form of the tattoo or what was written on it. The footage was too grainy.

"I think that we finished for today, Hopes." Said Deeks "I'm going to sleep, 'cause I'm tired as hell."

"Good night Marty." She kissed him in the cheek. "I'll look into the case for a little while and I'll go to sleep, too."

"Good night Hopes."

As soon as she heard Deeks close the door Hope dialed Eric Beale's number and she prayed that he was awake.

"Eric Beale at your service ma'am."

"Don't ma'am me Eric. I need a favor."

"Shoot."

"Can you send me a program for software installation?"

"What kind of software are you looking for?"

"Well, I have a grainy picture that's old, maybe 9 years and I need to clean one specific part of it."

"I'll send you the software program and I'll write you up a list of steps that you must complete, so you can install it."

"Thanks Eric."

"You're welcome."

10 minutes later she got the program and the required steps. It took a while till the program downloaded and the install process took almost one hour.

…

* * *

She was deep asleep when she heard a soft thump in Deeks' room. She jerked away the blanket and she hurried to his room. Deeks was on the floor, on his stomach, groaning.

"Hey Marty, you okay?"

"Mhm. I just fell off my bed."

She helped him stand and she took him to the living room. He sat on the couch and he closed his eyes as he clutched his hands on the stomach.

"Do you want some painkillers?"

"Yes."

Hope took a bottle from the counter in the bathroom and filled a glass with water.

"Here take them."

"Deeks gulped the water slowly draining the glass. He could hear his heart beat in his ears. His head pulsed with pain and he couldn't open his eyes.

"Marty…"

"Yeah?"

"Talk to me."

"I had a dream…"

"Whoa, you sound like Martin Luther King Jr."

Deeks smiled at her remark. Hope was glad that she made Deeks smile for the first time that day. She was happy that Deeks was regaining his senses again and that he was trying not to become a person that lacks the ability to feel. She was glad that this time Deeks was finally able to face his fears and knock them in their face.

"I'm serious Hope. I had a dream last night. Ray was in it. He was asking me for help. He was screaming for help."

"When was the last time you two spoke?"

"2011, before he and his girlfriend were taken in witness protection."

"I know it is supposed to stay secret, but haven't you tried to contact him?"

"Nope. I wanted though, but I could've compromised his position. The man Ray testified against believes he is dead and if he gets a little hint of what Ray is alive…"

The computer beeped and Hope took it in her lap. She got a clear image of the tattoo and she showed it to Deeks.

"Deeks I might know who the killer of Granger's son is."

"I'll call him and let him know what we've got. We need to include the team."

Hope and Deeks spent the next half an hour calling their colleagues letting them know about the case that presented itself and how it was connected to one of their current active cases.

...

* * *

**-OSP 11 a.m.-**

"Mr. Deeks, tell us what you discovered."

Deeks looked up around him and he saw Granger, Kensi, Callen, Sam, Nell and Eric (in that order) staring at him and Hope like their lives depended on it.

"One month ago, Assistant Director Granger told me about the murder of his son." (Pause) "He asked me… er, well actually I wanted to help him get some closure and I thought I would be able to solve the case. I worked the case every single day since then, but I couldn't find the missing piece of the puzzle. Last night after Hope convinced me to let her help me, she had a chance to revise the case, too. Sorry Granger, I know I promised, but…"

"It's okay Deeks, go on."

"I watched the video of the murder" Hope continued "and I noticed something. At one point the killer takes off is jacket and reveals his arms. I noticed he had a tattoo on his right bicep. I downloaded a software program that Eric sent me to sharpen and clear the image. I left the picture to sharpen and I went to sleep. This morning, the program finished with the picture and I could see the tattoo very clearly."

Hope tapped on the screen twice and the picture with the tattoo appeared on it.

"What does it say?"

"It says JHA (JNA) or Jugoslovenska Narodna Armija. On English Yugoslovenian National Army. And it belongs to Kristijan Tanevski. I double-checked. There's no doubt."

A brief silence filled the operation center and Hope continued.

"Kristijan Tanevski served in JHA from 1978 till 1980, since it was mandatory at that time. In that period he got the tattoo. All of the soldiers got one of those."

'Why did he killed Granger's son?" asked Callen, clearly agitated about the fact that Kristijan Tanevski had the ability to appear out of nowhere and integrate himself in their lives.

"I don't know yet, but what I do know is that he'll go down royally in prison." Said Deeks "I asked a friend over at the LAPD to run the print in the system to see if he can get a hit and corroborate our story."

"We'll need evidence to nail him down for this murder, too. And I asked a friend at our fingerprint database to coordinate with Deeks' friend so the search goes faster." Said Hope.

"I want to say thank you to all of you." Said Granger "Deeks, you are a man of word, and I appreciate your effort to solve this case. Now, every one of you, find that bastard and bring him in. Dead or alive."

They stayed stunned at Granger's order.

…


	13. Atonement Part 2-It's Not Over

**Chapter 13-Atonement**

* * *

**Part 2-It's not over**

* * *

**I want to point out that few things in this chapter I needed to create, because of a chapter I wrote before this and so the events needed to follow that chapter. I hope that you enjoyed the story so far and that this chapter will engage you with something, before I write the next one, because I'm super busy. Today I finished my last exam for this mid period, but I have to do seminary works after the Easter break (my Easter is in Sunday, 12****th ****of April) and I may not be able to post a new chapter for few days, maybe weeks. I hope that you will understand that. Thanks for all the reviews and kind words I got so far. All I can say is that the story it's not over yet. There is more to follow.**

* * *

Deeks took some time alone in the rest room where he was able to think of all the things that happened these few months. He thought about the time he spent undercover as Max Gentry in the operation for taking down the illegal arms dealing group and he recounted every moment he spent with David Lucas. How he was eager to know him, to know about his childhood, his life, his interests. All that time Deeks thought David wanted to befriend him and to know him as a friend, but now after all, he found out what the true nature of discovering his past and what he did for a living was. Deeks realized that for many people in his life he was the toy they played with. His help was requested when needed, and then he was quickly forgotten. Deeks felt angry to himself; because he guessed he couldn't fool David Lucas with his undercover character.

Deeks felt guilty for Callen and that he let Tanevski shoot him. He had lots of regrets about this mission, but now he had to be focused as to find Tanevski and bring him in. He owed to many people. To all of the people that Tanevski hurt somehow, to Callen, and to Granger, since his son suffered from Tanevski's deadly hand. He owed it to Kensi, to Sam, to Nell and Eric, and to Hetty. He owed Hope, too. He knew somehow Tanevski hurt her, too and even though she was trying to hide that beneath the surface he knew there was a bit of a personal reason for her to hunt down that horrible man from Macedonia to Los Angeles.

He was thinking of the time he was held captive by Tanevski and he didn't hear when Hetty joined him in. She touched him slightly on the shoulder, and he almost hit her backwards when he jumped.

Hetty could see that her touch startled him and in fact she noticed him jump every once in a while when someone touched him.

"I'm sorry Mr. Deeks. I never meant to scare you."

"You didn't scare me Hetty. It's just… I was thinking about the op and…" his voice trailed off.

She could see the insecurity in his eyes. She took one of his hands in hers and she looked at him.

"Do you want to talk about what's on your mind Mr. Deeks?"

Deeks breathed heavily as he struggled with his fears of telling Hetty about what happened a month ago. He never wanted to get close to someone and ruin their lives, but Hetty wasn't someone, and she knew him for a long time and there was no need for him not to tell her.

"I don't know from where to begin Hetty."

"From the beginning Mr. Deeks."

Deeks took few ragged breaths and began.

"After Ruiz slammed the trunk of the Ford shut, I was afraid that I was going to suffocate to death. But, the drive wasn't long. He pulled over and he opened the trunk. That's when I saw Tanevski." (Pause) "I figured that Tanevski shot Callen."

"That's right Mr. Deeks. He indeed shot Mr. Callen."

"I should've been the one that was shot Hetty. He wanted to kill me."

"That's what the team figured out, too."

"How does Callen feel about it?"

"He is mad at himself for not listening to you Mr. Deeks."

"He shouldn't be."

"He says that he should've listened to you and your pleas and warnings. He is right about that Mr. Deeks. You were in this organization for 6 months in 2006. You met Ruiz in 2015. It was the same person. You knew him well, and that's how you knew something was wrong. And Mr. Callen isn't the only one with the guilt problem. I'm guilty for what happened, too."

"No, no, no, Hetty it wasn't your fault. I tried to convince him, but he wouldn't listen Hetty. And he paid with a bullet in his stomach."

Hetty was stunned at how Deeks put himself under the team leader and his friend and forgot about what he suffered. She was surprised to see that he didn't think she and Callen were guilty for the situation.

"Go on Mr. Deeks."

For the whole time Deeks was telling his story, Hetty didn't let his hand out of hers.

"After Tanevski shoved me on the backseat floor he covered me with a blanket. He drove maybe 29-30 minutes and then he stopped. He started the engine again and stopped after he parked the car. When took me out of the car, I could see that we were in a garage." (Pause) "He took me to the house. He cuffed me on the trestle that was made of pure steel. He left me there and he got out. I don't know how much time passed. But, I was starting to scan the surrounding and to find an escape route."

"That's when he got back."

"Yes. He caught me by the neck and he was ready to bash my head in the table leg. But, I managed to kick him so hard that I broke his leg. He screamed from the pain and then I quickly tangled my legs around his neck in a chokehold. He passed out. I managed to get the key from the cuffs and I freed my hand."

Hetty looked at Deeks and wondered how the hell he found the strength to free himself and ran.

"I ran as fast as I could as far as I could. Just when I stopped a car and the couple got out of it, he pistol whipped me on the head. The next thing I remembered was that he was on top of me waiting for me to wake up."

The horror Hetty saw in Deeks' face, told her everything.

"He tried to rape me Hetty." Deeks said and his eyes watered at the thought of the horrible day he spent on North Sierra Bonita Avenue popped up in his head.

"He tried Hetty, but I never let him do it."

Hetty knew that Deeks had a lot to fight now, after his confession.

"He left the room. By the look on his face, I could say that he was pissed that I fought him back."

"He was convinced that he could dominate you Mr. Deeks. But, you showed him that not everyone is submissive. You showed him that you are stronger than you look like. And what's most important you showed him that he is a coward."

"When he came back, I kicked his bad leg and I ran again. Just when I reached the stairs, he pulled me back. We fought and then I fell from the stairs."

"You were pushed Mr. Deeks."

"He hit me so hard…"

"I can see the consequences Mr. Deeks." Said Hetty, gently touching his left cheek that was now scarred. "You still look good, though. And nothing will change that. Ever."

Deeks smiled briefly before his eyes went dark again.

"The whole time I was held there Hetty I thought about Kensi and all of you. I thought about the things we did these few years. I hoped that you will come and save me."

Hetty could see how hurt one of her agents was.

"You should talk to Nate Mr. Deeks. It will help if you talk to him about what happened."

She couldn't even say the word because if she did she might've exploded.

"I'll try." He said.

"There's nothing to be ashamed for Mr. Deeks. It wasn't your fault. That man had sick fantasy and you couldn't have possibly known that he was like that."

He wanted to say something, but his words turned into choked sobs and the next thing he knew was that he started crying and Hetty eased his head on her shoulder. She cradled him like that for some time.

"There, there, it's over Mr. Deeks. It's over."

Deeks suddenly stood up and paced up and down the room.

"This isn't over Hetty. We still don't have Tanevski."

"We'll get him when the time has come for it Mr. Deeks."

Deeks was trying to control his rage, but it overwhelmed him. He clenched his hands in fists and he pounded the wall.

"Sit your but down, Mr. Deeks!" Hetty yelled behind him.

Deeks looked at Hetty's fiery eyes and saw anger mixed with understanding.

"Hetty, look no disrespect, but I won't stay on this matter. I'll go forward."

"I know."

"I'll go to Macedonia, if I have to."

"I know."

"You know… What are we waiting for?!"

"Patience Mr. Deeks. Patience."

"Patience?! Right now he can be out of LAX and in Skopje and who knows, maybe he is out of his home country and you tell me to be patient?" (Pause) "He has a head start of one month."

He collapsed on the couch and he ran his hand through his unruly mop of blonde hair.

"He killed David. He shot Callen. He almost killed me when he threw me through those stairs. He killed Granger's son. He… He…"

He couldn't say anything else as he felt Hetty's hands wrapping around his neck and he felt Hetty draw him closer to her.

"Hell, right now I feel like I'm going to be sick. And I'm pissed Hetty. Royally pissed."

The Manager of the Office of Special Projects never saw Deeks in such a state before, as he was now. She knew that Deeks would overcome the loss of his once close friend, but the fact that one of his colleagues has been shot and the same man tried to kill him too; she knew that matter won't stay unavenged for much longer. She was afraid that the events from his past will blind his judgment, but she also knew that Marty Deeks won't do anything stupid that may ruin his career. He was a smart ass that knew how to think with cold head.

"Listen to me Martin."

It was the first time for him to be addressed by his given name from the little ninja like he used to call her.

"We'll do everything in our power to find that bastard and bring some peace to you. And to the other people that suffered from his hand."

"Thanks Hetty."

"Oh, Mr. Deeks you don't have to thank me for that. You know that the little mother will do everything for her children."

Deeks' face grew serious.

"How did you know what..?"

"Oh, you'd be surprised of what else Henrietta Lange knows Mr. Deeks. But, if I tell you everything, I'll have to kill you."

"That serious, huh?" Deeks' remarkable grin appeared on his face.

"That and more Mr. Deeks."

They both laughed at that and left the rest room together hand by hand.

…

* * *

He walked down the alley as he replayed the plan he was going to use on Ray Martindale. It took almost a month before the tech he contacted found where he was stationed. He was taken to Miami, Florida at first, but a year ago he was transferred to Georgia. He spent the month to research about the man he was going to kill soon. His other friend gave him a car that can't be traced back to him. It was a Corvette, but an older model, all beat-up. He spent couple of weeks in Miami contacting people that knew Ray. His name given by the U.S. Marshals was Charlie Mitchell. He had a wife and a little girl. He was an upstanding citizen and he never did something that was against the Constitution.

In early 2014 he was transferred to Georgia. Ray was hard to track down, but Tanevski found him. _Nothing stays hidden from me_, he thought as he waited in the alley. Ray lived in a two-story high brick wall house that was surrounded by chain-link fence. It was painted in light green. There was a patio in front of the main entrance and it had a small space that served as a parking lot. He noticed two unmarked SUVs parked up front. He assumed that Ray and his family were guarded by at least 4 people. He figured that he'll need a ruse to get them out of the house.

On his way to Georgia, Tanevski bought a gun without serial number and a silencer for it. He sold the weapons to his buyer and he had all the money in the world. He needed the gun to kill his enemy and Ray was the crucial piece of the puzzle for him to actually do it.

He banged on the door and one of the guards opened the door. He said he needed help to put his car in gear. When they left the patio Tanevski pulled his gun out and he told him to get all of his people out. The U.S. Marshal called something out to his com, and two more agents left the house. He quickly shot them all and he entered the house. There he found Ray sitting on the couch. The fourth guard was speaking on his phone and he quickly shot him before the guard had a chance to pull his gun out. He quickly pistol-whipped Ray on the head and cuffed him. He climbed the stairs and found Jena in the bedroom. He pulled the gun out and aimed at her. She froze in place. Tanevski grabbed her and slapped her hard on the face. He bound her hands and he brought her down to the living room where Ray lay on the ground unconscious. He shoved her on the floor and ordered her to lie face down. He searched the house, but he couldn't find the little girl.

"Where is your daughter?"

"She is at my friends' house."

"Call them and say that she'll be staying a couple of days with them. Tell them that something came up and you will pick her up later this week."

Jena was grateful that Kenzie wasn't home that day. She punched few digits on the phone and called her friend. She told her something and ended the call.

"Now we are going to a ride."

…

* * *

Hetty and Deeks walked into the bullpen when they heard Eric whistle.

"Sorry to interrupt you guys, but there's something important for you to know Deeks." Said Eric.

Deeks climbed the stairs. Hetty followed him. Just as Deeks entered in OPS, Eric's monitor beeped. He typed something in it before he felt Deeks breathe in his neck.

"Here's the deal guys. 20 minutes ago the house where Ray lived in witness protection was breached."

All of them observed Deeks' reaction, but Deeks' face went still.

"Eric, details." Said Callen with low and controlled voice.

"20 minutes ago three of the guards that were titled to guard Ray and his family were killed in the alley behind the house. The fourth agent reported something was wrong before he went down. When the police arrived at the scene they found the dead bodies of the guards. No sign of Ray or of Jena or their daughter."

"Daughter?" Deeks asked absentmindedly.

"Yes. They have a daughter. You won't believe her name."

"What is it?"

"Mackenzie." Said Eric.

Deeks smiled, but it was a sad smile. "Go on Eric."

"The security camera across the street caught a glimpse of the man responsible for the attack. It's Tanevski."

That's when Deeks' vision blurred and he felt his head throbbing.

"Where was he located Eric?" asked Sam.

"He was in Miami, but a year ago the U.S. Marshal Service relocated him in Ellijay, Georgia."

"Ellijay?" Deeks asked, pain written on his face "I've been there. On vacation, last year."

"Deeks you couldn't have known that Ray was there." Said Callen.

"I should've called him earlier." Said Deeks not hearing what Callen said "I should've called him. I promised."

"Deeks!" Kensi lightly touched him on the arm, but he backed away.

"This is all my fault."

"No, it's not your fault Deeks." Said Sam.

"It was my call on this op Deeks." Said Callen.

"I wanted this op started Callen. I wanted to finish it. And look where it got us. Tanevski took Ray. If he does something to Ray or Jena, I won't be able to forgive myself."

"We'll find him and take him out Deeks." Said Granger firmly gripping Deeks' shoulder.

Hetty disappeared quickly and by the time Deeks and the others went to her office, she was on the phone with the U.S. Marshal Service's Director, John Pierce. She argued with him fiercely and Callen thought she was going to rip him apart if it wasn't for the phone. After a heated argument with Mr. Pierce, Hetty slammed the phone. She fumed.

"Someone hacked into their system a month ago. They breached the firewall and they were specifically looking into Mr. Martindale's file." Said Hetty as she calmed down.

To say that Callen was angry would be understatement "And they didn't call us?"

"The stupid tech operator they have didn't notice the attack until today."

"So, Tanevski has someone to help him hack into the system."

"Yes."

"Hetty their other cases may also be compromised."

"I know Mr. Callen, I know. I already told Ms. Jones to go through the files and see if there's anything suspicious. I have Mr. Beale to track down the hacker. You will fly for Georgia the first flight I can find place on."

They all left Hetty's office preparing for the flight.

…

* * *

Eric and Nell both typed in their keyboards at the same time they looked at the screen. Every few minutes they got new info on their case and they piled up the files into one folder named "Ray". It was strange to see that folder with Ray's name in the center of OPS.

Eric was able to track down the movements of Tanevski and found out that he bought few burn phones. He called the gas station where they were bought to confirm the presence of Tanevski there. He was lucky that the owner meticulously kept a log of the footages. He send the video from 01/20/15 to Eric and he quickly found the man he was looking for. The owner also gave him the numbers of the phones. Eric thanked him and tracked the numbers. He saw that Tanevski called three numbers from the first burn phone. The first number belonged to a man that owned a car sales shop. The second number belonged to a known arms dealer and the third number belonged to the hacker. Eric almost jumped, grin forming on his face.

"Gotcha!"

"What?" Nell asked while she typed few more keys before turning towards Eric.

"I found the hacker. I'll go and tell Hetty." Eric said as he vanished from OPS.

Nell continued working on the task Hetty had given her. She was supposed to discover if any other files from the witness protection program have been breached. After one hour fruitless search, she concluded that the hacker's target was exclusively Ray's file. She notified Hetty.

…

* * *

"Hetty! I found him! I found the hacking bastard." Eric screamed as he approached Hetty's office.

"Very well Mr. Beale." Said Hetty "I will send a tactical team to pick him up. Thank you."

"You're welcome Hetty." Said Eric and he went to the bullpen to tell them the first good news that day.

…

* * *

Nell continued with the search for Ray and his family when she noticed something. When she checked the phone logs from today she noticed outgoing call made just few minutes after the guards were killed. She tracked down the number and its owner. She then called the number, saying she was form the NCIS office in Los Angeles. She said that she investigated the disappearance of Ray Martindale, his wife Jena and his daughter Mackenzie. She was surprised to hear that the girl wasn't missing. She quickly hung up and she stormed through the stairs. When she got to the bullpen she could hardly even breathe.

"Easy Nell." Said Eric "What happened?"

"Mackenzie is safe."

"How?" asked Callen.

"I was able to find out that someone called a number few minutes after the attack. It was Jena and she was calling a friend to tell them that she and Ray will go on vacation and that she should take care of their girl." By the time Nell finished talking Hetty joined in the conversation.

"Your flight to Georgia will leave in less than two hours ladies and gentlemen. You will be flying down in Gilmer County Airport." Hetty said.

"Thanks Hetty." Said Callen

"Don't thank me Mr. Callen. Thank Owen that almost got the Manager of the airline company arrested for obstruction of justice."

"Don't make me a monster Henrietta." Said Granger as he appeared out of nowhere. Standard Hetty issue. "I was just doing my job."

"Well, ladies and gentlemen prepare your go-bags."

"Sure thing Hetty." Said Sam.

After they left the Mission Sam whispered in Callen's ear "I wonder how did Granger get us an airplane and a landing on an airport that has no connections whatsoever with LAX? I don't think that they established a line between L.A. and Ellijay."

"That's because we will fly out from a small airport in the outskirts of L.A., not from LAX agent Hanna." Granger answered his question behind him.

Callen laughed at Sam as they continued walking to their cars.

"Seriously G, he is hanging around with Hetty, too much time."

"I hear that Mr. Hanna." Hetty yelled.

They all scattered around the city as each one of them drove home and prepared for the trip. Callen called Joelle and told her he would be out of L.A. for some time. She knew about the op from what he told her and she pleaded for him to get back uninjured. He wanted to promise her that, but he knew from experience that you shouldn't promise something that you can't keep.

Sam and Michele had a brief talk. Then he kissed her on the forehead, hugged his daughter and left.

Kensi and Deeks were watching the sunset together while Hope packed her warm clothes.

Granger searched through his apartment and found a pic form Alden when he was just a little boy. He tugged the picture in the front pocket of his coat. He wanted to have a reminder for the op he was going in. He waited for this moment for so long that he thought he should be prepared to control his feelings.

…

* * *

Callen and Sam took the Challenger, while Deeks, Kensi, Hope and Granger took the SRX.

"Notify me on any change of situation Mr. Callen." said Hetty "You find Ray and bring me that sick bastard on silver platter. And remember come home safe and sound. Don't get yourself killed. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, all clear Hetty." Said Callen as he closed the door of the car.

All of them knew how dangerous this op was going to be and Hetty's words confirmed that.

But, they were determined to end the hell Kristijan Tanevski created once and for all.

…


	14. Lost and Found

**Chapter 14-Lost and found**

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**As you can see I'm not from Georgia, and I don't know if I described Ellijay well in the introduction of this chapter. I'm sorry if I have mistakes in that part. However I changed the current Mayor's name.**

**And about Tanevski, all I can tell is that the next chapter will be all about the way how this thing will unfold, and finally it will be the end of Tanevski's reign. I can't tell however how this op will end. But it will be either by death or arrest. I'll leave that up to your imagination, while I finish the next chapter that I already started.**

**And again, the story isn't finished yet.**

* * *

_**(From chapter 13)**_

_Callen and Sam took the Challenger, while Deeks, Kensi, Hope and Granger took the SRX._

"_Notify me on any change of situation Mr. Callen." said Hetty "You find Ray and bring me that sick bastard on silver platter. And remember come home safe and sound. Don't get yourself killed. Do I make myself clear?"_

"_Yes, all clear Hetty." Said Callen as he closed the door of the car._

_All of them knew how dangerous this op was going to be and Hetty's words confirmed that. _

_But, they were determined to end the hell Kristijan Tanevski created once and for all._

…

* * *

"The City of Ellijay is located in the Gilmer County, Georgia. It's called the 'Apple Capital of Georgia' and it's an Appalachian Trail Community. The city holds an annual Apple Festival in October. And the city is the county seat of Gilmer County." Said Callen, as he scrolled down on his tablet, new info about the city they were going to, appearing every second on the screen "It rests between two rivers, the Ellijay and the Cartecay, that come together to form the Coosawattee River. Ellijay is governed by a five member City Council and a Mayor. Currently the Mayor is Anthony Boyle. The area's large 2.7 square miles. It says here that if you visit Ellijay you will have the unforgettable experience to look at the Appalachian foothills, and the mix of forests, streams, historic ambience and Southern charm."

Deeks looked through the window of the plane. He hadn't spoken since they left the Mission and that started the alarm bells to go off in Kensi's head. She tried every trick she knew to pull him out of his shell, but he continued with his silence. She was surprised when he spoke, his voice low with a hint of sadness.

"Ellijay is the anglicized form of the Cherokee name Elatseyi meaning new ground. I guess there is some symbolism to the place where the U.S. Marshal Service relocated Ray."

'If it wasn't for this op, we could have enjoyed this city." Said Sam clearly upset with everything that was done to Deeks since the case begun.

"I guess we'll have to visit it again after this." Said Kensi, hoping that Deeks would respond this time.

"It's a great place Kens." He said "I experienced some bad days after you came back from Afghanistan and I needed a place where I could charge my batteries and Ellijay seemed the right choice. It has some great mountain cabins with a fireplace and with a little magic you could make really romantic stay there."

Kensi held her breath when she heard him speak about the city that now had his childhood friend in it. He was depressed for a long time, but he seemed like he was hit from a stray bullet when he heard that Ray was taken. The fact that Tanevski had him made Deeks feel worse and that worried Kensi. Her happy-go-lucky boyfriend and partner was gone and was replaced by the dark Deeks, scaring her a little.

Oh, if she just knew what he experienced in the hands of Kristijan Tanevski…

Anyway, they sat in the cabin for the longest time before the pilot announced that they were landing Gilmer County Airport. It was well past 11 p.m. They headed immediately to the police station of Gilmer County. They spoke with the Chief of the police who assured them that they were doing their best to find the man that kidnapped two of the citizens of the city of Ellijay. Ellijay had around 1700 citizens and it looked like they were a tight community. Something you couldn't find in L.A. or the bigger cities, unless it was a quarter.

Callen called Hetty to tell her that they arrived in Ellijay and that they will start working the crime scene as soon as the CSU team left Ray's house. She repeated once more for them to be careful.

The NCIS team was provided with two Chevy SUVs and Callen could almost picture Hetty giving orders to the people that owed her favors.

Callen, Sam and Granger took the first SUV and Kensi, Deeks, and Hope took the second SUV. They headed for the house where Ray lived in this past year. At first Callen thought that it would be best they leave Deeks in the police station, but the pleading look on his face made Callen to reconsider his thoughts.

But, when they arrived at the place that was home to Ray, Deeks lost it and Callen once more wanted to kick himself in the ass for letting this happen.

As soon as Deeks saw the picture of Ray, Jena and their little girl on the wall he collapsed on his knees, tears streaming from his eyes. They were all caught up in the moment that they didn't hear Deeks' cell ringing. They hated to see Deeks break in front of their eyes and Hope wrapped herself around Deeks resting her head on his shoulder whispering something that only Deeks could hear. He was finally able to gather himself up and picked up the phone. His face expression gave them all a hint that the call wasn't from a worried Hetty or some friend of Deeks'.

"Hello?"

"Is that the best LAPD detective Marty Deeks?" said Tanevski, teasing Deeks, as he clawed his nails in the flesh of his palm.

"Where is Ray?" Deeks asked anger surging through his body.

"Easy there detective. Your friend is okay. And so is his wife. But I won't tell you our location. At least not yet. It's kinda funny to see you sweat from fear for your best friend's life."

"Listen to me, you son of a bitch…"

"No, no, no detective. You listen to me. You will do everything exactly as I tell you or your friend here dies. Do you understand?"

"Yes."

"Tomorrow at noon, you will come at the address that I will send it to you before the meeting. You will come alone. If I spot any of your lovely colleagues Ray dies. Even if I catch a whiff…"

"Okay, okay, you've made your point."

Deeks closed his eyes and squeezed the phone tight in his hand. He threw the phone into the wall behind him and he was going to lash out again, if it wasn't for Sam that hugged Deeks so tight he took the air out of his lungs. Sam cradled Deeks in his embrace for a while and then drove him out of the house.

Hetty made sure they were staying in the best hotel in Ellijay and she kept her word. Sam took Deeks to his room. He was extremely cautious as he saw him burst through the door of the bathroom and he couldn't say a word afraid that he'll get the longer end of the stick.

…

* * *

"He must have had a ruse planned so he could extract the guards out of the house." Said Callen surveying the surroundings of the house.

The street was dimly lit and you couldn't tell a man from a lamp post.

"You can see from the footage that Tanevski opened the gate. He rang the door. One guard appeared. He then told him something and the guard followed Tanevski." Said Hope desperately watching the video for the hundredth time.

"Then he pulled the gun out and threatened the guard. He told him to call his colleagues which he did. But, he must have had a code word that he said during the call that made the fourth guard to stay in the house and request help." Said Kensi.

"After he killed the three guards he entered the house. He wasn't surprised to see a fourth guard and he shot him dead like he was nothing." Said Callen, pure rage pouring out of his words.

"There's a blood trail over there which means that Tanevski must have pistol-whipped Ray on his face." Said Hope.

"Then he moved through the house looking for Jena. When he found her, he forced her to call her friend and tell her they were going on vacation." Said Kensi "But there is one thing bugging me."

"Why hasn't he grabbed Mackenzie, too?" said Hope.

"Exactly."

"Maybe he thought that it was enough if he had Ray and Jena. He knew that would attract Deeks' attention and that he'll come and save his friend. His ultimate high." Said Callen.

"I don't think that Tanevski wants any of them alive." Said Granger. "I think that he is planning something for both Deeks and Ray. And we need to be there to prevent it."

"I hate to see him like this." Said Hope.

"I just hope that this will be the endgame of Tanevski. I don't want to be in Deeks' skin if we fail to catch him this time." Said Callen with determined voice. He knew that the last time they hoped everything was going to end, he got shot and Deeks was taken by a madman. "Let's go to the hotel and get some rest guys. We'll think about Tanevski tomorrow."

…

* * *

Deeks showered quickly and when he got out of the bathroom he found Sam sitting in a chair staring at him.

"I thought you went to your room."

"I didn't want to leave you alone Deeks. Not in this moment."

Deeks was touched by Sam's words and he could feel the tears clouding his eyes.

"We were really close back in the day Sam." Deeks said while he dried his hair. "We would play hide-and-seek or walk in the park and talk about nothing in particular. We were happy that we had each other to support ourselves. Our mothers weren't enough strong to take care of us, so we learned to take care of ourselves at young age. Mine defended me from my father in few occasions, but the rest of the time she didn't care."

Sam pictured Deeks' mother as he knew her and he could hardly imagine what it was for them two to fight Gordon John Brandel. He had the opportunity to meet Christine Deeks and he witnessed the change in that woman. But, he was careful not to mention anything to Deeks. This op was still ongoing and the least Deeks needed was a distraction. Sam listened to the story of that brave woman and he was sure if Deeks knew about her reasons why she was so laid back, he would let her in his life again.

"Deeks you don't have to do this to yourself. You don't have to remember the sad things. Think about when we find Ray. What are you going to say to him when we find him?"

"I would tell him that the thing with Wikipedia is official. And that I'm sorry I didn't call sooner."

"That's a start Deeks." Said Sam.

"Thanks Sam."

"For what Deeks?"

"For being there for me. You know I never had anyone so close to me since I left home. I appreciate it."

"Always kid." Said Sam squeezing Deeks' shoulder as to reassure him that they had each other's backs.

He then left the room.

…

* * *

Deeks woke to a terrible nightmare with a headache just to see Kensi by his side.

"Hey Kens."

"Hey Deeks."

"How long have you been here?"

"Couple of hours. I was watching you while you were sleeping. You looked like a baby."

Deeks smiled and he let Kensi take him into a hug. They stood like that hugged for a long time.

Kensi started to his shirt. When she started unbuttoning his shirt he rejected her, quickly getting out of bed.

"Deeks what's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just…"

He looked into her mismatched eyes full of questions, but he couldn't tell her. Not yet. He wasn't ready for that and frankly he didn't know what her reaction would be.

"Something is off with you Deeks. And I think that you are holding something back from me."

"I can't talk to you about that Kens."

"Talk about what?"

"About why I can't make love with you."

His words echoed in her head and she wondered what had happened to the old Deeks. His eyes had a dark shadow casted over them and she took a step back at the rage she saw in his eyes.

"What are you talking about Deeks? I can't get the point of this."

"You don't understand."

Deeks was talking seemingly unrelated things and Kensi thought about the concussion he had over a month ago. She was afraid that the trauma had taken its toll on Deeks' mind, but when she saw him flinch from her touch she knew there was more to the time he was taken by Tanevski. Before that day he was the happiest man alive. After that day he was reacting to the world as if it was his everyday routine. He didn't have fun with her or the others like he used to.

She stood by the door observing Deeks as he watched the mountains through the window. He remembered the first time he came in Ellijay and how calming it was for him to just look at the hilltops. Now, he was there a year later, but the feeling of calmness was gone.

"If you need to talk I'm here."

"I know Kensi, I know. But, I can't tell you about it. I'm not ready, yet."

"Okay."

She left his room.

Now, Deeks was all alone. He wanted to sleep, but the sleep just wouldn't come. He was having some trouble with his thoughts and finally a little before sunrise he closed his eyes and fell in a dreamless sleep.

…

* * *

Callen, Sam and Kensi were having a late breakfast since they overslept the morning. It was 9 a.m. There were only three hours left to the meeting. They ate in silence, but both Sam and Callen noticed something was wrong with Kensi.

"Kens what's up?"

"Nothing." Kensi replied with mouthful of donuts. She wasn't ready to tell them about last night.

They knew that Kensi attacked the food when she was sad. She noticed both of them staring at her and she choked down on her tears. She told them everything. She told them about last night, and about the previous days when she noticed Deeks wasn't himself anymore and that she suspected that was somehow connected with the time Deeks spent on North Sierra Bonita Avenue.

Just when they were laying out theories, they heard Deeks approach them and they shifted the course of the conversation.

"Good morning Sleeping Beauty." Said Sam to Deeks.

"Good morning Uncle Sam." Deeks replied with a big grin.

For a moment it seemed like it was the old Deeks, but the darkened look he had on his face, never left him. Sam thought to himself, _there's definitely something going on with Deeks._

"How are we going to proceed this operation guys?"

"We were thinking, since he told you to come alone, you should go alone. But, we will be watching your back. As soon as Ray and Jena are safe, we move and take Tanevski."

"Sounds like a good plan."

"We have the help from the county police and the FBI branch in Georgia. Tanevski popped up in their radar, too. Don't worry Deeks, we'll get him this time." Said Callen firmly gripping Deeks on the shoulder

"We better do Callen, or else I won't be able to face all of you."

"Why is that?" asked Sam, his chocolate eyes locking on Deeks' ocean blues.

"I've probably said too much." Said Deeks and went to his room.

Kensi stood up, but Callen caught her by the elbow and stopped her.

"Leave him be Kens. He'll be fine. He'll tell us when he is ready."

…

* * *

They all had been on edge since it was well past noon and no one appeared on the spot Tanevski made Deeks to come to, alone. There were FBI agents and Gilmer County police all over the place and Callen, Sam and Kensi resided in a van that appeared to be from a local pastry shop, but it was a cover so they could monitor closely what was going on. Hope and Granger were in close proximity of the building. Everything was too quiet, even for Tanevski. He pulled up the Corvette close to the building.

All of them noticed Tanevski approach the building. He knew that there were agents scattered around the place, but he couldn't figure out where they were hidden. But, the blonde detective was alone and he had a chance to take him now or never.

Deeks' phone rang and he picked it up on the second ring.

"I've seen you kept your word detective."

'Where is Ray you asshole?"

"Straight to business, huh? He is with me and so is his beautiful wife."

Deeks closed his eyes when he heard Tanevski breathe heavily and sniff Jena's hair.

"She looks gorgeous. It's a shame, since I'm not interested in women."

"Spare me from your pep talk Tanevski and leave them alone. You wanted me, here I am. Let them go."

"Okay. A deal is a deal."

Deeks watched as Ray and Jena got out of the car and moved towards him.

"Now, you move towards me Deeks." Tanevski ordered.

"Do not do what he says Deeks." Deeks could hear Sam's voice.

"Move you bitch!" Tanevski screamed and Deeks started moving.

"Deeks, no!" Kensi screamed and it took both Sam and Callen to restrain her from blowing their cover.

When Deeks and Ray finally met halfway, after all this time, Ray instead of hugging him whispered "Stop Marty!"

"Why?"

"There is a bomb planted in the car behind me."

Deeks' eyes spread wide open when he heard what Ray said. His heart started beating faster and faster as he thought what he should do to save them all. He motioned for them to move faster and then he whispered in his com. "Guys there's a bomb planted in the car behind Ray and Jena. After Ray came to his side, he hugged him for the longest time before he yelled "Ray run!"

…

* * *

The team was in a position to move and they were all scared for the outcome when they heard Deeks telling them about the bomb.

…

* * *

Tanevski noticed something was wrong the moment Ray and his wife started running and he took the remote detonator. When the detective was close enough to the car, he detonated the bomb.

The car immediately exploded and knocked Deeks against the wall. All of the agents, and the police moved in unison when they heard the explosion.

Hope and Granger were the closest to Deeks and they moved to help him. Hope searched for a pulse, while Granger took Deeks' limp body in his arms. While he cradled Deeks in his hands, he whispered in his ear. "Don't die on me Alden. Don't die on me."

Hope was stunned to hear Granger compare Deeks with his son, but there wasn't time to think about that. They needed to get out of there quick.

She never noticed Tanevski behind her.

…


	15. Fino alla fine

**Chapter 15-Finno alla fine**

* * *

Kensi was mad at Callen for letting this to happen. If it wasn't for him or Sam that held her, she would have come out of the van and would have helped Deeks. Now, he was in the ER, doctors and nurses hovering over him. They were going to observe his state and if there was something to worry about they were going to operate him. She was fuming and it took a lot of effort for her not to show her emotions.

Hope was wrestling with her emotions, too. She couldn't erase the moment when she saw Granger pleading Deeks to stay alive. When she saw him like that she immediately thought of her husband's death. She was looking in his eyes helpless, knowing that he was in pain, unable to help him. She hated to see the people she cared about hurt by this vicious man. He was on palm's reach, but the explosion prevented them from tracking Tanevski down and arrest him.

…

* * *

He could almost see the woman with the brown hair, the Inspector from Macedonia. He saw the other agent holding the detective in his hands, pleading with him not to die. He was about to take him when he heard the agents shouting. He used the crowd of agents and policemen and fled the scene. He decided to lay low for a few days and take the detective when it was possible.

"Deeks!" Kensi shouted.

"Kensi!" Sam shouted after Kensi and ran after her, knowing that the car might explode again. They were all in danger.

When they saw Granger holding Deeks in his hands they all started breathing again. Kensi noticed Hope shaking badly and sat next to her to calm her.

"He is alive Kens. He is alive." She smiled through tears.

They were sitting like that hugging each other until the ambulance arrived. Then Kensi left Hope and joined Deeks in the ambulance.

…

* * *

Hope was quiet for the whole ride to the hospital and Callen was worried about her. He saw that reaction many times before, and he was determined not to let go of that so easily. He knew what holding it in yourself could do to you.

"Hope?"

"Huh?"

"How are you?"

"I'm fine Callen." She snapped, ending the conversation there.

But Callen pushed forward. "You know if Deeks was here, he was going to tell you that you shouldn't say 'I'm fine' when you are not."

Hope caught a glimpse of Callen's reassuring look and smiled. "Okay, I'm good."

"That's better."

"Thanks Callen."

"You don't have to thank me Hope. Just don't beat yourself up for what happened to Deeks. It was all my fault. I shouldn't have let this thing get this far."

"It's not about that Callen. I know that every op has its pros and cons, but that's not why I am like the Grumpy cat."

"Then why are you like this? What's the reason?"

"I'm pissed off because just when I think I'll catch Tanevski, he runs from me again."

Callen stopped the SUV and looked at Hope's hazel eyes with his piercing blues. He realized that there was more to the reason why Hope came to America to bring in Tanevski.

"He killed my husband Callen." She said, her voice barely above a whisper. "He killed him and he almost killed me. I survived, but I watched him die Callen. I watched how the life left his eyes and I couldn't do anything. I was pregnant at the time."

"Oh my God, Hope, I'm sorry."

"I lost my family Callen and Tanevski is the one to blame for it."

"How did it happen?"

"Hit-and-run. He was never caught, though."

"So, how did you know it was Tanevski that…?"

"I never forget faces Callen. Never ever."

Callen knew that Hope was agitated by the questioning and decided not to press her more. Instead, he continued with the drive and both of them spent the rest of the drive in silence.

Deeks was brought to North Georgia Medical Center in Gilmer County.

…

* * *

**Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of life. Define yourself.**

**-Robert Frost**

* * *

"Family of Marty Deeks?"

"Yes."

"Detective Deeks is fine. He has multiple cracked ribs, a concussion and a few burns, but his vitals are fine. No major damage on the inside, and no hemorrhage. However, we will keep him overnight to see if there is something wrong, but I don't think there will be anything new."

"When can we see him?" asked Sam.

"As soon as the anesthesia wears off you can see him. But, one person at a time, please."

"We'll do. Thank you doctor." Said Callen.

Callen immediately started planning the security detail of the hospital. He assigned two FBI agents alongside two policemen to guard Deeks' room. He assigned 4 more agents around the hospital perimeter. He asked every one of his team to go and catch some sleep before they started guard watch.

"In two hours mine and Sam's shift will start. We will be changing every 6 hours. Kensi, you and Hope will take our place by midnight. Granger, you and the Chief of police will start your shift in the morning."

"Okay agent Callen." Said Granger and left the hospital.

Everyone looked at Granger and thought about how difficult it was for him to watch the man responsible for his son's murder escape the law once more.

"Guys, remember, we need to protect Deeks from Tanevski. He is a sociopath and I think he'll try and take Deeks again. So let's not screw this up."

Everyone nodded in agreement.

…

* * *

Callen relieved Sam from his three hour watch and told him to go and rest in the hotel and that he'll take care of Deeks. Sam grunted, but it was Callen that gave the order, so he headed for the door. He murmured "Yes, Captain Callen" which was received with a serious death glare by G.

"Now, it's just you and me Deeks." Said Callen, looking at the detective.

He looked so peaceful while he was sleeping and Callen wanted it to stay that way. Callen wanted to spare him from the hard world around them, but he knew that he couldn't. It was the hardest thing when you tried to save one of your own. Callen was thinking about the first time he saw Deeks.

6th of April 2010. His alias was Jason Wyler. He was undercover in an MMA gym with tough Marines and he looked like he was born to do undercover work. He never suspected that Wyler was a cop. No one did. When he found out that Hetty employed him as a liaison officer he thought it was a bad idea, but five years later he asked himself what would have become of his team if it wasn't for Deeks? Dom died, and God knows who would've been Kensi's partner. He couldn't imagine anyone other than Deeks to be her partner. She trusted him, and he trusted her. It was all Callen needed to rely on the detective's ability to help them get through the day.

Deeks grew on him and even if it was tough to admit that, Sam liked him too. His non-stop talking, the funny laugh, the crooked grin, the jokes, his understanding for them… Only a great man can do that. They were playing and joking with him half the time Deeks was with NCIS, and he never said a word about it. Instead, he would just laugh off the topic with them and continue with his day like it never happened.

Callen let his guard down when Deeks showed up and he hated to admit that the blonde surfer got to him like no one ever did before. It was different for him. It was as if an invincible force dragged him closer and closer to the realization that Deeks represented the baby brother Callen never had. They both had experienced a horrible childhood, each one in a different way, but the wish was the same, to be normal kids, like everyone else.

However, Deeks was an enigma for Callen. He knew some things about Sam and Kensi from what they told him, but he hadn't any clues as to what was Deeks' life like before he joined the NCIS. Hell, he knew more about Hetty than about Deeks. He knew that he shot his father when he was 11 years old (if Deeks knew that he would probably kill him for investigating, but he wouldn't be Callen if he didn't do his job), and he met his best friend Ray, but he didn't know anything about his childhood. How did he manage to study law and finish Police Academy top out of his class? How was he able to help the homeless people in the shelter with all the work they had? Where did he find the strength to be happy about life and have love for all the people in the world, no matter if they were good or bad?

One thing G. Callen admired Marty Deeks was his inner ability to always find the good in people.

Now, Callen wasn't able to help his friend and colleague. He failed him when he needed to support him and now Deeks faced the consequences. His eyes were rimmed by black circles. He had 'exhausted' written on his forehead.

Callen was lost in time and thought when realized Deeks was staring at him.

"Hey Deeks. How are you doing?"

"The head hurts a little, but I'll be fine."

"You scared us all when the car exploded. We thought you were dead."

"I guess I fooled the Death one more time." He smiled when he said that, but his eyes had a sad look in them. 'How's Ray?"

"He is fine. He has a slight concussion, but he'll be just fine. He and Jena took their daughter and they are in a safe house. The FBI sent few agents to guard them until the U.S. Marshal Service finds them a new home."

"When can I see him?"

"I don't know. I'll ask Hetty in the morning to see what she can do about it."

"And Tanevski?"

Callen waited for this question to come ever since Deeks woke up. He lowered his head and struggled with the words.

"He escaped again."

"That's why you are here?"

"Yes. That and because I needed to see with my own eyes that you are good."

"You are afraid that he is coming after me right?"

"Yes."

"To be honest G, I'm afraid, too."

Deeks had that "lost puppy look" on his face when he said that and it broke Callen's heart. Then he realized that Kensi was right earlier that day when she said something was wrong with Deeks. And it had something to do with Tanevski.

"Deeks can I ask you something?"

"Ask away."

"But, I need you to be honest with me. Whatever it is."

"Fine."

"What really happened when you were held captive by Tanevski? And don't tell me nothing, 'cause I know there is something. Something you never told anyone about it."

Deeks was looking at the ceiling as the thoughts of that day popped up in his head. He tried hard to fight with the fear he felt from that day onwards, he almost forgot how it felt to be a normal person. He thought he forgot about that day, but yesterday with Hetty and now with Callen brought it all back.

…

* * *

**-20****th**** of January 2015-**

Deeks woke up just to see Tanevski on top of him. He was bound by the wrists, and it was hard to move. Tanevski snapped off the cuffs.

"If you move or try anything your friends at the NCIS will pay the price. Do you understand?"

Deeks nodded.

The fact was that Kristijan Tanevski always had a knack for males. He tried to make out with few women, but the feeling was not the same. He wanted to try it out with a man for a long time and the blonde detective showed up just in time. He wanted him to suffer for what he made him do in 2006, and the only way to do that was to be punished the worst way possible.

Tanevski removed Deeks' jacket and started touching him. He removed his shirt and continued caressing him with the one hand, while with the other reached inside his pants.

Deeks never wanted Tanevski to see him weak like that, but all he could do was plead for him not to do it. But, all that pleading was fruitless. Tanevski took him with an intent to make him pay and this was the way to do it right, according to him.

Tanevski eased him on the bed and unbuckled his pants. Deeks felt nauseous and his head was throbbing and pulsated with pain. He could still feel Tanevski touching him when he remembered that he broke his leg earlier that day. He kicked him in the bad leg and Tanevski flew across the room. Deeks quickly got up from the bed and kicked him hard in the stomach. He frantically tried to think of a way to escape the man that was now on the floor.

Suddenly Tanevski got up and hit Deeks on the back. Deeks fell on the floor. Tanevski beat the living hell out of Deeks with whatever came to his hand and left the house afterwards. Deeks held his breath for a moment before he realized that he was all alone. He shivered from the cold floor and quickly got up and dressed. He lay on the bed and started crying, thinking about what had just happened. He tried to erase the images from his mind, but it was too late. He was shaking so badly it took him half an hour to calm down. Somehow he managed to close his eyes and drift to sleep.

Tanevski was pissed off at the detective, because he was the one person in life he met, that he couldn't be dominated.

…

* * *

Deeks finished his story looking at the wall unable to face Callen. He couldn't look at him afraid that he'll see pity in his eyes. Callen clenched his fists tight and he was going to punch the first orderly that came into the room if it wasn't for Sam who called his name.

"G! You here?"

"Yes Sam, I'm here." Callen said, but he constantly looked in Deeks' direction as to see if he was okay.

"Can you give us few more minutes Sam?"

"Sure thing. Deeks you okay?"

"Yeah. Just a headache and my ears are ringing."

"Bad high-school days, kid?"

"Mhm. And Sam?"

"Yes?"

"Don't call me kid please."

"I won't, I promise."

Deeks and Callen were alone again.

"Deeks look at me."

"I can't."

"Look at me damn it!" Callen said reaching for Deeks. He caught him by the jaw and forced him to look at him. "Listen to me! It wasn't your fault and you couldn't have known about what that sick son of a gun wanted to do to you. I understand, believe me, I understand what you went through. I won't pity you nor would I watch my friend and brother destroy himself because of that prick! Do you understand?!"

"Yes. I understand."

Callen let go of Deeks' jaw and sat in the chair. He observed Deeks for a few minutes and just when he stood up he heard Deeks.

"G?"

"Yeah Deeks?"

"Why me Callen? Why me?"

Deeks' effort to hold on wasn't enough and he broke down in front of Callen. He started shaking violently and cried out all the grudge and pain he got in himself. Callen hated to see Deeks so vulnerable and he wanted to hunt down Tanevski and kill him slowly for what he did to this wonderful man.

He took Deeks in his arms and both of them stood like that for a long time. Callen eased Deeks on the bed as he slowly closed his eyes and his breathing evened.

…

* * *

Sam was waiting for Callen to get out of Deeks' room, but what he saw wasn't his partner. It was a different Callen. He was like a raged bull.

"If I lay my hands on Tanevski…"

"What happened G?"

"I'm not at ease to discuss that with you Sam, sorry."

Sam knew when to stop when it was Callen in question. "Okay. Hope and Kensi will be here any second. Care to have a cup of coffee?"

"Yes. I'd kill for a cup of coffee."

"I know you will G. I know you will."

…

* * *

All of the agents and policemen made sure to double-check everything in the hospital. So far there wasn't anything new on the APB for Tanevski. What they didn't know was that Tanevski was watching their moves closely. He analyzed every point covered by agents on the outside and he even got in the hospital disguised to see how many people were guarding the detective. He learned which NCIS agents were in the hospital in which time frame, and that made it easier for him to find out when was the woman with brown hair on guard duty. If he was going to take the detective with him, he was sure he would do that on her shift.

…

* * *

**-16****th**** of March 2015-**

Deeks spent four days in the hospital and he was starting to feel bored, since he was in bed the whole time with nothing to do. But, that time helped him to reconsider his stakes in this operation and to bond with Callen.

He was surprised that Callen called him his brother. He finally was accepted within his team. It took him a long time, but it was better than most of his previous partnerships. Before NCIS he felt like he never belonged anywhere.

He was determined to end this once and for all when he was out of the hospital. Callen and Sam were in the hotel, while Hope and Kensi were in the cafeteria waiting for him to pack up his things. He smiled at the thought of the two women worrying over him. He was like a magnet for women.

He was busy stuffing clothes and personal items in the bag that he never felt someone entering the room. But, he felt the cold muzzle of the gun against his neck.

"We meet again detective." He heard Tanevski's hoarse voice whisper in his ear.

He felt helpless again, as he felt his hand touching his back finally resting on his waist, and removing his SIG.

"Move!"

Deeks started moving when suddenly Hope appeared on the door. There was a brief exchange of looks between Hope and Tanevski, and Deeks felt a connection between them, like them they knew each other more than from what Hope told them. Tanevski charged the gun firing at Hope that threw herself on the side escaping the bullet in millimeters. Tanevski fired once more and Deeks temporarily lost his hearing in the right ear.

He somehow managed to kick Tanevski in the chest with his elbow and take his gun back. He dialed Kensi's number and informed her on the situation.

Just when Deeks helped Hope stand and they tried to leave the room, Tanevski kicked him in the back.

Deeks fell on the ground. Hope surprised him and disarmed Tanevski. He fought her back. They exchanged some hard punches. Deeks watched the scene unfold in front of his eyes unable to help his cousin.

…

* * *

Kensi called all of the agents and policemen in the surroundings to help her.

Deeks was on the third floor and Kensi frantically wanted to get there. When she saw that the elevator wasn't coming fast, she started climbing the stairs.

…

* * *

Tanevski gave the final punch and Hope fell on the ground. Her gaze seemed unfocused.

"Hope!" Deeks screamed at his cousin as Tanevski took him in a chokehold, after he collected his gun and Deeks' SIG.

"We're going to the roof."

Tanevski dragged Deeks through the hall and took the elevator. They went to the fifth floor and Tanevski forced Deeks to climb the stairs that led to the roof.

…

* * *

"Deeks! Hope!" Kensi screamed their names as she searched for them. She was almost going to stumble over Hope. "Hope? Oh my God! Are you alright?"

"Yes. Find Marty. Tanevski has him. They are going to the roof."

Kensi yelled for a doctor. "Callen where are you?"

"We are five minutes out Kensi." Callen shouted in his comm.

"We don't have five minutes. Tanevski has Deeks. They are headed to the roof."

Callen's rage came to a boiling degree when he heard that Tanevski had Deeks again. "Sam make those five minutes two, or else I swear I will…"

"Calm down G. I'm driving as fast as I can."

"Sorry Sam."

They drove in silence the rest of their way.

…

* * *

He couldn't breathe. Tanevski hold him tight by the throat. His vision began to go red from the effort to stay conscious, but damn this man was strong. Tanevski continued to drag Deeks through the roof.

"I'm gonna jump and you are coming with me, you little bitch! We will make a statement. You are going to be remembered and so will I."

Deeks didn't know how he found the strength since he felt the life draining from his body. He took Tanevski by his arms and somehow he managed to free himself, throwing Tanevski over him. He quickly kicked him in the stomach. He backhanded him on the mouth and Tanevski dropped the SIG. Deeks took his own gun. He was busy thinking of a way how to take him that he didn't see when Tanevski got up collecting his gun from the place where it fell during the struggle.

Suddenly FBI agents and policemen surrounded the area. Deeks raised his gun and pointed it in Tanevski's direction.

"Tanevski! Stop!"

"I will never stop and you know it Deeks."

"Stop or I'll shoot you right where you are standing."

"Oh, you'll do that. Really?"

Deeks breathed heavily and it took few short gasps so his breathing would come back to normal.

"Turn around Tanevski!"

Tanevski chuckled dryly and faced Deeks. He looked at Deeks with dark predatory eyes. He recalled their time together as he wanted to call it. But, the SOB protested and his attempt didn't come to an end.

"I guess this is your end Tanevski."

"You guess right."

"You are hard to catch Tanevski."

"Well, you are not. I caught you, didn't I?"

"Yes, you did. And now I'm paying the debt I have with you."

Suddenly Tanevski pulled out a gun. Colt .45. It was a big caliber and could be fatal if fired on the right place of the body. Deeks hold his SIG aimed at Tanevski, his eyes fixed on the gun.

"Tanevski put the gun down! You have nowhere to go."

"Oh yes I have Deeks. After I kill you I'll leave America and your country will never see me again."

"You are not leaving Tanevski!"

Tanevski aimed the gun behind Deeks and fired. Deeks just stood there unable to fire the gun. He froze in place and he remained like that until another shot threw him back to reality. One FBI agent got shot in the leg.

Deeks focused on Tanevski again.

"Next time I'll shoot you in the head. I won't miss. I promise."

Kensi found her path to where Tanevski held Deeks on his aim. Both men had their weapons drawn.

"Why aren't you firing your gun Deeks?"

She slipped through one of the windows and she was right behind Tanevski. At the same time Tanevski aimed at Deeks' head. Kensi fired and hit Tanevski in the shoulder. Tanevski dropped the gun and fell on the ground, moaning in pain.

"You didn't see that coming, huh?" Kensi said as she pushed the gun out of Tanevski's reach. "You are under arrest."

Deeks watched Kensi put the plastic cuffs on Tanevski's hands. He just stood there in place and he couldn't say anything. He dropped his gun and he sided slowly to the ground. He used the wall as support.

He took his head in his hands. His breathing was ragged and he kept saying the same thing over and over again like a mantra.

"Why did I freeze? Why did I freeze?"

Kensi came up to where he was seated and she took his hands in hers.

"You need to put your act together Deeks. Please."

Deeks looked at her eyes, but it seemed like he was seeing through her. That's when she saw two policemen taking Tanevski into custody.

…

* * *

Callen and Sam were one block away when they heard the gunshot. They looked at each other when Sam pressed the gas pedal of the SUV harder. "Kensi status!" Callen yelled through his comm.

"Tanevski is in custody Callen." Kensi said, but her voice wavered.

"Something else happened Kens." Callen said that more like a confirmation than a question.

"Deeks froze. Tanevski had an aim at him and he froze. He didn't take the shot and an FBI agent went down as a result of that."

"How's the agent?"

"He is good. He was shot in the leg, but he'll survive."

"The DOJ will be all over this." Said Callen.

"They'll chew up Deeks." Said Kensi. "He came to his senses after the second shot. If I didn't shoot at Tanevski he was going to blow Deeks' head. I'm worried about him Callen."

Callen didn't say anything as they rushed through the stairs.

…

* * *

Callen and Sam came to the place where Deeks and Kensi were on the roof. Sam was ready to yell at Deeks why he did what he did, but when he saw his face, he gave up. Callen gave him and Kensi a sign to leave.

"Hey Deeks, I'm going with Sam. Is that okay with you?"

"Yes Kens. Go."

For the whole time Deeks kept his head down. His head hurt like hell and he fought hard against the pain. Callen seemed to understand what happened with Deeks during the gunfight and he knew that his head hurt. He was twitching like a wounded dog and blinked twice as fast as normal.

"Your head hurts, huh?"

Callen's words came through as a muffled sound.

"Mhm. It happens a lot these days."

"It's probably from the concussion. It will go away, don't worry." (Pause) "Hey, Deeks I just want to know that I understand what happened to you with Tanevski. It happened to me and to Sam over the years. For me it was difficult to fire the gun after I shot the first guy in my life. I was with the CIA my third week on the job and we followed a lead on 4 suspects in a high treason case. The guy pulled a gun and he aimed at me. I made a judgment call. I shot him twice and I killed him. I couldn't carry the burden of a murder in my mind. I knew it was a bad guy, but still I felt story. However, I was in a lot of gunfights after that through the years. One day, I and my partner were about to catch some guys that were planning to steal a war head. There was a shootout and I just froze. Just like you froze few moments ago. I stood there, guns firing and I couldn't do anything to help myself. I can't explain why it happened, but it did. My partner was yelling at me to fire, but I had a panic attack, my hands were shaking badly. In the end the backup arrived and they cleared the mess. They caught the guys, five in number, plus two dead. We were short by one CIA agent. I blamed myself for his death."

"I understand what are you trying to do Callen, but it won't help me."

"Listen to the end Deeks and then you'll have a chance to decide what to do."

"Okay, go on."

"My partner said that my gun jammed during the shootout. He never told anyone about what happened really, and I was grateful that he kept his mouth shut. However, I felt guilty for a long time. I know in my heart that I should've fired and helped him, but I didn't. I could've get him killed. And if they killed us and if they had stolen the nukes? I questioned my actions every time I had to work on the field. One day, I decided to quit the force. And then a little tea-sipping ninja with short brown hair and glasses sat me down, and she told me a story."

"Like you are telling me now."

"Exactly. She told me about the time she experienced that very same thing. Her talk helped me understand things better and I was able to get over it. Believe me Deeks, before that conversation I was resigned with the fact what I will be in future. It didn't matter if I was a taxi driver or sales man. But, after Hetty talked to me I realized that I had still a lot to do. Sadly, but this world has more than one bad guy. Hetty had the documents prepared. I signed them and I became an NCIS agent. During that same time Sam retired from the SEALs. He was having trouble finding a job and Hetty recruited him. Kensi joined us shortly afterwards."

"You make a good team Callen."

"We make a good team Deeks. Don't forget yourself. You are part of this team as much as Sam, Kensi and I are I'm sorry it took me so long to figure that out."

"The DOJ will eat me for breakfast for what happened to that agent, huh?"

"They will certainly do an investigation on the circumstances under which the thing happened. I will talk to Hetty and ask her to stall them a little until we end with our questioning on Tanevski."

"Thanks Callen."

"No problem Deeks. I'm here for you. We are all here for you Deeks. All of us."

"How's Hope, G? Tanevski knocked her out pretty badly."

"She has some nasty concussion and few cracked ribs, but she is a tough girl. She was yelling at the guy in the MRI when we got here."

"I think that the bad guys in Macedonia won't miss her, anytime soon."

"MTE."

"What?"

"My thoughts exactly. Something Sam says he learned from his daughter."

Deeks laughed at that and Callen was glad he actually succeeded with his intent.

Deeks' body protested when he tried to get up, but Callen was there to help him. As soon as Callen touched him, he regretted it. Deeks jerked away and helped himself. When he realized it was Callen and not Tanevski he apologized.

"Sorry Callen. I don't know what got into me."

"It's okay Deeks. I get it. It will pass. Just give it time. Okay?"

"Okay." Deeks smiled.

Finally it was the end of Kristijan Tanevski's reign.

…


	16. There is no place like home

**Chapter 16 - These is no place like home**

* * *

**Sorry it took me long to update this story. I was having a crazy time of studying and going on exams, etc. etc. but now I'm back and I'll look to update this and my other story as fast as I can.**

* * *

Deeks was staring through the window, waiting for Ray to come. It was their last day in Georgia and Hetty made sure that both should have a small talk before her team departed for LA.

He was thinking of their last time together and how close it was for him to lose his best friend. The U.S. Marshal Service found him, Jena and their daughter a house in the suburbs of Chicago. He was given a completely new identity and was about to start a new life. It was possibly the last time Deeks was ever going to see his childhood best friend and it broke his heart. They shared many things in life and now they were separated because of Ray's safety.

"Marty?"

"Ray?"

Ray took Deeks in a bear hug. Both men shed few tears and held each other for a long time. Finally Ray broke from the hug and took his time to look at Deeks.

"You look like shit Marty."

"Thanks Ray."

"And you've lost some weight."

"I'm working for a Federal Agency Ray. They don't actually give me much free time to eat."

"I'll talk to Hetty about that."

"You spoke to Hetty?"

"She called me this morning to tell me something I'm sure you'll be happy about."

"What's that?"

"She said that she'll give us secure phones so we can communicate. Whenever you need a talk or you want to know what's going on just dial and I'll be sure to pick up."

"Hetty is amazing."

"She said that you could use some talk now after your living nightmare is over."

"She said that?"

"Not with the exact words, but I'm sure she said 'end of the living nightmare'."

"Ray, I need you to know that I am truly sorry that you and Jena were taken because of me."

"Don't worry Marty, I explained everything to her. She understands that the man had an evil mind and she doesn't blame you for what happened."

"You have no idea how evil mind that man has Ray." Said Deeks, looking away from his friend.

Ray noticed the change in his once best friend. He wasn't the same. He looked worse than the last time he saw him, and he was sadder. Those ocean blue eyes had a dark shadow in them that gave him the feeling that Marty experienced something really, really bad.

"What happened to you Marty? What happened to the joker I knew? By now you would've cracked few jokes, but all you do is talk about how sorry you are and look away from me. That's not you Marty. At least not the Marty I know."

Deeks felt the hot tears in the back of his eyes. He felt dizzy and if it wasn't for Ray he would've hit the floor.

"Sit down Marty. You are exhausted. When was the last time you had some actual sleep?"

"It's been a while."

"Something bad, huh?"

"What are you talking about?"

"About what happened to you? You can fool the others Marty, but you can't fool me. And I'm sure that all of your colleagues ask themselves what's wrong with you."

"It's interesting."

"What?"

"The last time I saw you I had to go undercover as Max Gentry. On this op I went undercover as Max Gentry, too."

"Marty you survived the hell that Gordon put you through. You shot the guy. You rose above all and you weren't this defeated."

"I can't Ray. Don't ask me to tell you. I have already told Hetty and Callen and I don't know how I will be able to look into their eyes ever again."

"I'm going back to witness protection. Your secret is safe with me Marty."

"Tanevski…"

And Deeks relayed to Ray everything that happened to him in the house on North Sierra Bonita Avenue. By the end of his talk he felt nauseous and if the bathroom was not close, he would've thrown up on the floor. Ray hurried to help him and offered a towel.

Deeks washed his face and grabbed the edge of the sink as his stupor. His knuckles were white, by the point of his skin becoming translucent.

"Marty I'm so sorry man."

"I'm sorry too Ray. I hope you never heard about that, but…"

"It's better for you to talk about it Marty. It will ease the pain that you are feeling."

"You sound like Nate."

"Who's Nate?"

"Our Operation Psychologist."

"Sounds like a wise man."

"And he is."

"Listen Marty, there's nothing for you to be ashamed of. You fought him back. Not many people can fight their captors."

Deeks nodded retreating to his own world again.

"Marty I know we haven't talked in years, and few years ago we hadn't the right chance to talk, like we do now."

"You always started a speech like this when you wanted to ask something."

"You were always a great judge of character Marty. You always knew exactly when someone will say the thing he said, and what would he say in a certain situation."

"Except for our fathers. I couldn't guess when they will beat the ever loving crap out of us."

"Well, that's an exception of the rule."

"Nulla regula sine exeptione."

"I don't know what that means Marty, but that my friend sounded like a smart-ass remark."

"It means 'There's no rule without exception'. It's a Latin phrase I learned during my time as a law student."

"Oh, the man of the law spoke. Hehe. Okay, so um…"

"Ray say it man."

"How's the thing with Wikipedia going?"

"It's official since December 15th."

"I knew it. The minute I saw how she was looking at you I knew it. It's a shame it took you 4 years to understand that."

"I guess we did understand after all."

"I'm so glad Marty. Congratulations."

"Thanks man. I should've called you earlier."

"My prophecy is fulfilled Marty and I forgive you for that. That's what this latest technology serves for." He showed to the table where there were two brand new Microsoft cell phones. "Just make sure to call me for the wedding."

"Promise."

"I think it's time Marty. I need to go."

"You know I suck at goodbyes Ray."

"Think of it as a vacation Marty. Besides I always wanted to go to Chicago."

"And I know the reason why."

"Just don't tell Wikipedia about it. I don't want her to think I'm not the right best man for you."

"Deal."

"What happened to us Ray?"

"I don't know Marty. We've come a long way."

"When we were kids we used to sneak out from our houses late at night. We were doing things we weren't supposed to do. We were happy back then even though we had to deal with our fathers."

The sadness in Deeks' voice was overwhelming.

"Marty, why are you so sad man? This isn't you. You went through hell with Gordon, you finished law school, you took a degree, and you went to the Police Academy, for Christ's sake. You became a cop. Hell Marty, you work with Federal Agents. Where's the happiness? Where's the joy? What happened to the sparkle in your eyes?"

Deeks was tough the whole time he was telling his story, but now when Ray asked him all those questions, he couldn't hold on much longer.

"It's dead Ray. It died when…" he couldn't finish his sentence when he felt Ray hugging him.

"No Marty. It isn't dead. It's lost somewhere deep inside you. All you have to do is find it."

"I'll try."

"You should talk to that Nate guy, the psychologist. It might help."

"Ray giving me advises about my psyche and well being. God, what did I do to see this?"

"Hey I'm a new man."

"Yeah, yeah, upstanding citizen, I get it. What happened to Oregon?"

"Well, the U. S. Marshal Service flew me from Oregon to Miami. I guess they liked the first location better. And the alligators did."

"But, last year they moved you."

"They caught some gossip that Nelson Sanders was planning on arranging a hit. Somehow he found out I was still breathing."

"They tried to save you from Sanders, but another lunatic came to your house and almost killed you. And I let that happen."

"It's not your fault Marty."

"I should've insisted the first time it happened. I should've insisted. Maybe if we waited, today nothing of this would've happened."

"Don't beat yourself up Marty. Stop thinking about that!"

"I can't."

"You have to. It won't do any good to you."

"I wish it was that easy Ray."

"Look Marty I know it will be tough, but you'll get through this. It's just a test of endurance."

"You are definitely changed."

"You have no idea. I drive Jena crazy."

"Oh, you drive me crazy too. You were and you are still a pain in the ass."

"I'm hurt Marty." Ray put his hand to his heart to gesture what he was saying. "I guess it's time."

Ray and Deeks hugged each other. Before he left the room Ray looked once more in Deeks' direction "Be careful Marty."

"You too brother, you too."

And then Ray left.

…

* * *

Jena and Mackenzie waited for Ray in the lobby of the hotel, together with Kensi and Hope. Ray spoke to the other agents before he went to see Deeks.

Kensi and Hope animated the little girl which seemed to be very happy to meet new people. She giggled non-stop and was talking about things she knew only in her own language.

Jena spotted Ray and she immediately stood up. "Honey how did it go?"

"Well. It went well. Give me few minutes with Kensi, will you Jen?"

"Sure."

"Kensi? Can we talk in private for two secs?"

"Yes."

Kensi quickly said goodbye to Kenzie and left Ray.

"What's up Ray?"

"I just want to congratulate you for the official thing with Marty. I told him that one day you will come to this point, but he thought I was talking nonsense."

"Thank you Ray. I hope you will have peaceful life with Jena."

"I hope that too Kensi. But knowing what happened says it can't be quieter than it is now. So, I'll live for the moment."

"Just take care of you and your family. And always tell them when something is wrong. That way they will be able to help you."

"Thanks Kensi. Take good care of Marty."

"I will. Bye Ray."

"Bye Wikipedia."

Ray said goodbye to Hope and left the hotel like he was walking out of a saloon in a Western movie.

…

* * *

The plane landed in LA late that afternoon. It was well past 7 p. m. and it was Sunday. All of them went home on Hetty's orders. They were going to work early the next day and they needed all the sleep they could get. Too much happened in one week that they weren't able to rest themselves. Deeks was half asleep on his feet and if it wasn't for Hope and Kensi he wasn't gonna make it to the car. Hetty made sure that their own cars awaited them on the airport.

"Hetty thought of everything." Said Callen with a sleepy voice.

"Yeah, Hetty is our savior." Said Sam grinning.

Kensi let Hope drive the SRX while she eased Deeks on the backseat. She wrapped her hands around him and she was happy to have him this close to her. She was listening to his soft snoring when she noticed the hotness on her body. At first she thought it was his body pressed on hers, but when she felt his neck she jerked away like she burned herself.

Kensi quickly touched Deeks' forehead.

"What's wrong Kens?"

"He's burning up with fever."

Hope turned the vehicle left and headed for the closest hospital.

Deeks was taken to the ER immediately. The nurse measured his temperature.

"His temperature is 39 degrees Celsius. We'll do everything to lower it. Don't worry."

"I hate hospitals." Hope stated as she lowered herself in one of the plastic chairs. "And I hate this chairs. Zero comfort."

"I hate to see Deeks in hospitals. He's been in and out of them too much for the last two months."

They waited for half an hour before the doctor that treated Deeks appeared in the waiting room. Hope and Kensi rose from their chairs at the same time and they scared the doctor a little. He backed away few steps and smiled in himself about his patient. He was sure that if something happened to him, they'll make him regret it.

"Mr. Deeks is just fine. He caught a cold, that's why his temperature was so high. I gave him some medicine that should kick in soon. He is asleep now. When he wakes up, you can take him home. Remember he needs to rest in order to heal."

"Thanks Doc. Phew." Kensi blew out her breath. "One day I'll prohibit any cold attacking Deeks."

"You should see me when I have a cold Kens. I can't breathe, I cough, I sneeze, and my whole body aches. I'm like my Grandma."

"I can picture it."

Both women smiled and went into the ER where Deeks lay on the bed. He seemed so peaceful in his sleep. He was finally free from the hold Tanevski had on him.

…

* * *

**-30****th**** of March 2015-**

Kristijan Tanevski was held in federal custody for a week before the NCIS decided to question him. Callen and Sam arrived early at the jail to take him to the Boatshed.

"Good morning gentlemen."

"Good morning. We came to take Kristijan Tanevski for questioning. I think that my boss arranged that to happen today."

"You are right. You have one scary boss, though."

Callen smiled and was thinking of the ways Hetty could intimidate a person when he saw the smug expression on Tanevski's face.

Callen couldn't restrain his anger and he was going to strangle Tanevski if it wasn't for Sam that stepped between the two men.

…

* * *

**-In the Boatshed- **

They left him in the interrogation room for a long time before they entered in it.

"So what do you think Sam? How many years will this thug spend in Oakville?"

"With all the things he did I'm sure he'll spend the rest of his life in prison. Max security, cell monitored 24/7. He'll like it."

"If he pisses off the guards he'll spend some quality time in the Shoe."

"He'll like that too."

"And the food…"

"Mmm, yummy."

"Hey, I'm here you know!"

"You hadn't gotten the right to speak up asshole!" yelled Callen and made Tanevski shut his mouth and stay still. "One charge of murder of David Lucas a. k. a. Lt. Col. Daniel Langley on 25th of December 2014. One charge of attempt of murder of a Federal Agent, that's me. One charge of kidnapping an LAPD detective. One charge of murder on Alden Granger in 2006. One charge of kidnapping of Ray Martindale and his wife. That's too many charges even for you Tanevski."

"I think you forgot one charge." Said Tanevski with an ironic smile that sent shivers up Callen's spine.

"I didn't miss anything Tanevski, that's all." Callen said firmly, but with a recognition on his face.

Tanevski let the matter go for now, but Callen knew that soon all of them will know about what happened to Deeks. Callen was determined to prevent Tanevski from revealing the horrible truth. He wasn't sure if Deeks will be able to face them afterwards. If it was for them to know about it, it would be when Deeks wanted it and on his own terms.

"You are right." Callen said. "I forgot one charge. The charge for arms dealing."

Now Callen smiled.

…

* * *

"You want to say something in your defense?"

"I won't say anything until my lawyer is here."

"So you plead the 5th huh?"

"Sound like that."

"So be it."

Sam's phone buzzed. It was a quick text message from Callen.

**Deeks is here. Come out.**

"Sit tight, I'll be back." Said Sam and sent his best death glare in Tanevski's direction.

…

* * *

Deeks woke up to see that Hope had prepared breakfast again. She wanted to indulge her cousin. She decided to spoil her cousin like the brother she never had. They got pretty close since she arrived in LA and she was grateful for that.

However, she noticed too (like everyone else) that something was wrong with Deeks. And it wasn't connected to his transformation in Max Gentry. The problem had deeper roots than that, and she asked herself, has that something to do with Tanevski?

She had a lot of time to think about everything.

Deeks was in and out of the cold the whole week. Hetty informed Hope that Deeks was suspended for the time being and that he should remain at home. There wasn't any information when the DOJ will send their team of investigators. Hetty was stalling them at the same time giving Deeks time to heal both inside and out.

"How are you feeling today Marty?"

"Better than I was yesterday."

"You scared me last night."

"I'm a scary guy. Or that's what they say."

"Marty don't joke with serious things."

"I've been close to serious stuff for a long time Hopes. I need something that can get my mind to other places."

Hope was even more scared when she saw the openness in his voice. For the whole time she knew Deeks he wouldn't let you know something about him, unless he's the one that will tell you that.

"I buttered the bread, there is the jam. I made fresh orange juice, it's in the fridge."

"What, you won't eat with your cousin?"

"I already ate my breakfast Marty. I'll go and shower now."

"Okay."

Deeks slowly ate his breakfast thinking for the tenth time how he was going to do the thing he planned since yesterday. He planned on going to the Boatshed to talk with Tanevski for the last time. He thought that Hope won't see him when he left, but she proved him wrong.

"Deeks! Where are you going?"

"Geez, you're like Hetty only higher."

"Deeks!"

"In the Boatshed."

"For what?"

"I need to see him. I need to remind him that after all he did I'm still standing on my feet." The anger in his voice scared Hope. "I need to do this Hopes."

"Are you sure you can?"

"I'm fine. Plus it's been one week and the cold is gone."

"Hah. That's your line."

"Okay, I'm good. But, I have to go Hope."

Deeks was pleading with Hope and all she did was shrug.

"If your temperature pops up again don't call me." She said and disappeared somewhere in the apartment.

Deeks hated to leave the matter at that point, but he needed to get to the Boatshed quickly.  
He entered in the Malibu, put the engine in gear and drove in silence. He flipped through the radio channels and found his favorite song "Far from home" by Five Finger Death Punch. He increased the volume and let his mind drift to a much better place. Kensi.

He was finally free from the hold that Tanevski had on him. He was finally free from his alias Max Gentry. He was just Deeks now, and nothing was ever going to change that. No matter what other aliases he would use he was free from Max. Hopefully he would never need him again.

It was hard to be Max and Deeks at the same time. He was afraid that he'll do something because now after the 'thing' was official he was worried that will influence his relationship with Kensi.

He had only one thing to resolve, though. One final meeting with Tanevski. One final face-to-face conversation with that man.

He opened the door of the Boatshed.

"God, it's good to be back." He said.

He found Callen sitting on the couch. "What's up G?"

"Deeks? I thought you weren't coming back to work till you've been cleared."

"I wanted to talk to him for one last time. And then I'm out of here. Need to serve my suspension right."

"That's the procedure. You know the DOJ almost ate Hetty last year."

"Don't tell me. They made Kensi cry. I won't forgive them for that never ever."

"What about you? You good?"

"Yes, I'm good."

But his eyes told a different story.

"If you need me sometimes, jus call."

"Thanks Callen."

"You are welcome."

"Hey Deeks."

"Hey Sam."

Sam pulled Deeks in a bear hug. "Why are you here?"

"Just to get some things straight with Tanevski."

"You sure?"

"As I'll ever be."

"Okay. Hetty called. She said we need to go to OPS. She has something to discuss with us about the case. You think you can handle Tanevski by yourself Deeks?"

"Yes, I will."

"See ya later."

…

* * *

Hope was cleaning the kitchen counter for the 10th time when she decided that she'll go to OSP. Today it was their day off and even that technically she was still on helping terms and not an official NCIS agent, she decided she should do some paperwork.

She couldn't keep her thoughts together, so she picked the thing she knew the best. Write.

The pile on her desk was smaller than the others and she finished it in record time.

Absentmindedly she was fidgeting with the medallion she had on her neck. It was the last thing her husband gave it to her before he died… scratch that, was killed.

She never heard Hetty coming behind her back.

"Hope?"

"Huh?"

"Tanevski wants to see you."

"Why?"

"I don't know. Mr. Deeks just called and said that Tanevski insisted to see you. I guess he remembers you."

"What?"

"I'll be in the car. Kensi will join us."

Hope was sure that Hetty knew something.

…

* * *

Deeks took few ragged breaths before he entered in the interrogation room.

Everything he was fighting against was only one door apart. He stood in front of the door and touched his forehead against the door.

"You can do this Deeks." He said to himself.

He opened the door. Tanevski looked surprised to see Deeks in front of him. He was expecting to see the two agents from earlier, but when he saw Deeks he backed away a little.

Deeks had that look in his eye, that homicidal look Max Gentry had. Angry. Fierce. Full of self-confidence. He wasn't the weak man he tried to take advantage of, not so long ago.

He looked at him and saw all that he needed to see.

"How are you doing Tanevski?" Deeks asked teasingly.

No answer.

"They treat you okay in jail?"

Again no answer.

"What? Cat ate your tongue? You know what? It's okay. I didn't come here to chat with you. I know every crime you committed, but that's fine by me. I came here to tell you something that I was keeping it for myself for a long time. Too long."

Tanevski opened and closed his mouth few times, but nothing came out of it.

"First, I want to tell you that I won this war Tanevski. You won the battles, but in the end I was the one that won this war. It's true that you hurt too many people, including me. Maybe you had your reasons for that, but there isn't justification for what you did."

"They deserved it. You deserved it."

"You tried to break me. To show me that you can dominate me. But, I beat you. What you did to me made me realize that I was stronger than I ever thought. I was weak then, and that's why I didn't fight back. Believe me if I did fight back, we wouldn't be having this conversation."

"Are you threatening me detective?" Tanevski suddenly shot from his place on the table.

"I'm not threatening you Tanevski. I'm just saying what would've happened. You are lucky I'm a cop. I'm not a murderer and a psychopath like you. If I was, you'd be long gone. Without a trace."

"But you have a dark side, too, don't you?"

"That's none of your damn business."

"I've seen you as Max detective. And Max wasn't much of a pleasant man. He was dark, mean…"

"Yeah, yeah, but that's an alias Tanevski. On the other hand, what you did, you did it yourself. You didn't actually use an alias and you didn't go undercover to do what you did."

"Actually I did use an alias."

"Well, you are right. But that doesn't say that your alias' persona did all of those things. You did it. You, as Kristijan Tanevski hiding behind a name."

"Isn't that what you do here at NCIS? You hide behind an alias, you go undercover, and you arrest criminals? Why don't you go in as yourselves detective?"

Tanevski had a point, Deeks concluded, but his tactic worked, because the next thing Tanevski said was close to a confession.

"In 2006 when I went into contract with Marcos Ruiz, I was expecting to get rich. But few days before the deal went down I had a meeting with Lt. Mark Soriano from LAPD. He downed few whiskies and started talking about an undercover cop. He didn't give me his name, but he gave me enough information to work with. I suspected you and David."

"How did you find out it was me?"

"David."

"So he was gathering info about me to give it to you."

"Yes. He told me that he researched you once, while you were undercover as Max. As soon as I read your story, something felt off. That's when I thought of a plot, so I could uncover the truth."

"You contacted General Novack at Camp Pendleton and you told him that you have someone that wants to be a Marine. At the same time one of his men dies, David looks a lot like him, takes his identity and you get your PI."

"But he never completed his task. He was so excited about his new job that he forgot to call me. Till one year ago."

"He started following me everywhere."

"And he found every single information that was written in the books. When I came to collect the information he ran off. But I caught him."

"And you killed him."

"Yeah, you are damn right. I killed him. Two shots point blank. It felt good." The excitement in his voice made Deeks to feel uncomfortable.

"You waited because you knew that I would contact Ruiz. David was his protégé and it was logical for me to ask him first."

"Then he called me and told me that Max wanted to make a deal."

"And you saw the long awaited chance."

"Yes."

"And when you made the deal with Ruiz you waited in the shadows like always. Ready to take me down."

"Yes. But, I missed you and I shot your partner agent G. Callen." He pronounced 'G. Callen' with Macedonian accent.

"But you had plan B ready. You made Ruiz to kidnap me. And then you took me to that house in West Hollywood."

"And I was going to accomplish my goal, but you fought back."

Deeks couldn't help, but smile at the fact that Tanevski admitted that he fought him back.

"I guess I should wish you a nice stay in Oakville then." Said Deeks as he started to leave.

"Wait!"

"What do you want now?"

"I want to talk to the brunette."

"No way am I letting my partner near you."

"Not that brunette detective. I meant the Inspector from Macedonia that came here to arrest me."

"What do you want from her?"

"She'll know. You just call her and tell her that I want to see her."

Deeks left the room and immediately called Hetty.

…

* * *

Hope quietly entered in the SRX and let Kensi lead the way to the Boatshed. Hetty followed them with her Jaguar.

"Hey Marty."

"Hey Hopes. Hey Kens. Hetty."

"I was thinking about a lunch Mr. Deeks. Would you like to come with us and Ms. Blye?"

"But…"

"I'll be okay Marty. It's just a talk. Besides, if I need help I could use the distress word and the cavalry will come to save me."

"If it doesn't get stuck in traffic."

Hope laughed at that, but she could feel the tension radiating off of Deeks. He felt something was going on with her, but she wasn't ready to tell him yet.

"Okay." Said Deeks and went with Kensi and Hetty

Hope entered in the interrogation room.

"The detective is a man of a word indeed."

"What do you want?"

"That's not a way to greet an old friend."

"That's a way to greet a murderer. And I'm not your friend."

"But our relationship goes a long way don't you think?"

"Mislam deka jas i ti nemame nishto za shto da zboruvame."

(I think we don't have anything to talk about.)

"Imame i toa kako gospogjice. Sedni.

(We have, miss. Sit.)

"Ti ne mi izdavash naredbi."

(You don't give me orders.)

"Kako se vikash?"

(What's your name?)

"Zarem ne go znaesh imeto na sekoja lichnost na koja si i go unishtil zhivotot?"

(You don't know the name of every person whose life you destroyed?)

"Tvoeto ime ne go doznav nikogash."

(I never found out what was your name, never.)

"Houp Brendel."

(Hope Brandel.)

"Makedonka so amerikansko ime i prezime. Bash ubavo."

(Macedonian, with an American name and last name. Pretty.)

"Vidi, nemam vreme za tvoite gluposti. Zatoa ako imash neshto da kazesh ti preporachuvam toa da go storish sega, bidejki nemam cel den na raspolaganje samo za tebe. Nie obichnite smrtnici imame rabota sekoj den."

(Look, I don't have time for your nonsense. If you have something to tell me, I suggest you better do that, because I don't have a whole day just for you. We, mortals have job to do every day.)

"Zoshto dojde po mene duri dotuka?"

(Why did you come all the way here to get me?)

"Mislam deka go znaesh odgovorot na toa prashanje."

(I think you know the answer to that question.)

"Ne go znam."

(No, I don't.)

"Dojdov da te uapsam i da te vratam vo Makedonija. No, sega mislam deka ke bide podobro da te ostavam tuka. Mislam deka vo federalen zatvor kje ti bide zabavno."

(I came here to arrest you and bring you back in Macedonia. But I think that it will be better to leave you here. I think that it will be fun for you in federal prison)

"Sakashe da me ubiesh neli? Sakashe da me ubiesh zaradi toa shto ti go napraviv."

(You wanted to kill me didn't you? You wanted to kill me because of what I did to you.)

"Hahahahha!" Hope laughed bitterly "Ako sakav da te ubijam sega nemashe da bidam vrabotena od NCIS. Kje bev vo zatvor za ubistvo."

(If I wanted to kill you, I wouldn't have been employed from the NCIS by now. I would've been in jail for murder.)

"Sé ushte ne mi odgovori na prashanjeto."

(You still didn't answer my question.)

"Sakash odgovor? Dobro, kje go dobiesh. Da, sakav da te ubijam. Mnogu sakav da te ubijam. Mi go odzede soprugot i deteto. Mi go unishti zhivotot. Vo pravo si koga velish deka sakav da te ubijam. A sega mislam deka e kraj na razgovorot. Nema shto povekje da zboruvam so tebe. Uzivaj vo prestojot vo Oukvil."

(You want an answer? You'll get one. Yes, I wanted to kill you. I wanted to kill you very much. You took mu husband and my baby. You destroyed my life. You are right when you say that I wanted to kill you. And now I think it's the end of the conversation. There's nothing left for me to talk about with you. Enjoy your stay in Oakville.)

Hope opened the door and signaled for the guards to take him back to the jail.

…

* * *

At the exact same moment Deeks, Kensi and Hetty came back from lunch.

"You didn't kick his ass did you?" asked Deeks with a smirk on his face.

"That would give him too much credit, don't you think?" Hope replied as she hugged Deeks.

"Something you want to tell me Hopes?"

"Not now."

"So there's something."

"Always the detective."

"I need to keep my wits sharp."

"Mr. Deeks I need you to go with Ms. Blye in the bullpen. I and Ms. Brandel will join you later. I need to talk to her in private."

"There's something mysterious about you Hetty that always amazes me."

"Get your butt out of here Mr. Deeks together with your smart-ass remarks."

"Okay, okay, I'm going."

…


	17. Wheels on the bus

**Chapter 17 – Wheels on the bus**

* * *

"It's over Ms. Brandel."

"I know Hetty. It's just…"

"Kristijan Tanevski is arrested. There's no reason for you to be sad."

"He is in jail, but that doesn't bring me peace Hetty."

Hetty looked at Hope's brown eyes and she knew that she'll make her cry with her next words.

"I know what he did to you and your family Ms. Brandel."

Hope remembered what Deeks said once, that Hetty knew everything about everybody.

"How long do you know about that Hetty?"

"About what Ms. Brandel?"

"About the reason why I chased Tanevski all over to LA?"

"From the beginning."

Hope sat on the chair in the interrogation room.

…

* * *

Deeks forgot his cell phone inside and he told Kensi that he'll go back and get it. He had a rough day and he didn't know where his head was. Kensi said she'll wait for him in the SRX.

Accidentally the 'record' button was turned on and Deeks could hear the conversation between Hope and Hetty.

…

* * *

"Do you want to talk about it Ms. Brandel?"

"I'll try."

And then Hope started talking about her life story that happened once upon a time in Macedonia and had personal note in it.

"Rule number one Hetty. When you miss a bus or a boy, you never run after either one of them. In my case it was reverse. One day, I was going home from high school. I was about to catch the bus when it suddenly passed right in front of me. I sprinted to get to it. I know I should've waited for the next bus, but I had a feeling that if I want for the other bus, I'll miss my favorite TV show. So, I ran. I got to the bus station in time, and got in the bus, breathless. I paid for the ride and I searched for a place where to sit. My knees were weak and I was afraid that if I stand too long I'll fall on the floor."

"And?"

"And, the bus was full except for one seat in the front row. A boy with blonde hair and blue eyes sat there and I asked him if I could sit right beside him. He said yes and I sat. As the bus was moving forward I caught myself literally staring at him. I blushed, and the first thing that came to my mind was that he seemed familiar to me. He said that he is third year in the high school of Economics. I said "No way, you gotta be kidding me". I told him that I was third year in the exact same school. Here comes the question how the hell I never saw him in the hall or on the breaks we had between classes. He asked me the same question. Suddenly the bus stopped and he said that he needed to get down on that particular station. Then he said "We'll stay in touch."."

"What happened next?"

"The next day we saw each other on lunch break. We repeated that couple of times when he said that he'll talk to the Principal and that he wanted to transfer in my class. He said that neither one of his classmates showed him respect or helped him when he needed. He said that I'm the perfect friend for a guy like him. Imagine Hetty, me of all people. I still remember that day in the bus."

"Then, you two married."

"Yes After two years on the day of our prom he asked me if I want to marry him. I said 'yes'. We married a year later, when we finished sophomore year Law School."

"I understand that you were working on your degree when the accident happened."

"Yes. It was in 2007. A little over few months after Tanevski came back from LA. I was working part time at the police department. They told me if I do well with my degree that they'll take me full time. The day when the accident happened, I found out that I was pregnant. I was so happy and I was convinced that he would be happy as much as I was. That day he came to my workplace and he said that he wanted to surprise me. I took my jacket and I put it on. He bought me flowers before he came. Roses, my favorite. He took me by the hand and we walked out of the precinct together. The last thing I heard from his lips was "I love you Hope. I always will." It was the anniversary of the day we met in that bus. And me, the fool forgot about that."

Hope wiped the tears that were forming on the edge of her eyes.

"He gave me this necklace. He was talking about something; I can't remember what while we were crossing the street. Out of the blue came this white Volkswagen Golf. He hit us with such a force that his body flew to the edge of the bridge. The longest river in Bitola is called Dragor. He almost fell in the river. I saw his eyes become glassy. They were wide open and lifeless. He died later in the hospital after few attempts of reanimation. I watched him die Hetty. I watched him slip away."

Hope couldn't help, but cry. She was sobbing and trembling. Hetty took her in her arms and whispered something in her ear, something that only Hope could hear.

…

* * *

On the other side of the screen Deeks was listening the whole time too and cried like it was his life story. He wanted to cry. Partly for Hope's tragedy and partly because of what happened to him. He never really had any time to let go of his emotions. He was busy too much showing to the world that he was strong, but in fact he was screaming from the inside. He took his head in his hands and tried to calm down. He was shaking.

…

* * *

"I felt how the life took away the only thing that was left from him. I lost the baby. After that I never turned back to my past. I took the degree. I spent some time out of Bitola. I traveled across Macedonia. Finally in 2008 I started to work full time for SVR Bitola. The first case that landed on my desk as Inspector was the arms dealing ring led by Kristijan Tanevski. The first thing that I saw when I opened the file was his picture. And all the memories from that fateful day emerged on the surface. It was the same man that killed my family. He killed my husband and my unborn child."

Hope stopped, gathering her thoughts.

"I was like a mad dog for the first few minutes since I've seen the photo. Then I calculated my moves and I calmed down. I accepted the case without revealing that he was responsible for the hit-and-run. After a year, the investigation was nowhere near solved and it was the same for me if they did or did not know who was responsible for my tragedy. I started following him. He lived on Jadranska Street in one of the buildings. He had an apartment there. He lived alone. He was working as a janitor in the REMO complex. He would get out of his building at 08:50 a.m. He'll start with work in 9 a.m. sharp. Then he would walk at seemingly unrelated places and he would meet with seemingly unrelated people. I took pictures and gathered intel through the years. Just when I was able to catch him, he slipped away once more."

Hope sighed.

"Hetty I want you to know that this case is not my personal vendetta. I just want to catch the bastard and put him behind bars. Now, he is behind bars and I wish I could say that I'm happy about it, but I'm not. I thought about killing him, but I'm all about justice. I wouldn't commit murder just to fulfill my needs. I know I withheld information from my boss, but I can't change that now. Plus if I killed him, what would that say about me Hetty? That I'm one more murderer and I would be on his level."

"I know that my dear. I never doubted your ability to make the difference between the right and the wrong. That's why I chose you to be one of my family members."

"Thanks Hetty. I appreciate all your help and the advice you provide me. Now, if you'll excuse me I want to shower and eat something."

"Of course my dear. Come on, I'll drive you."

…

* * *

Deeks stared at the screen motionless thinking with 100 km/h. He was thinking about his childhood, about the time he spent in high school. His first crush (also a brunette). The time spent in college. His time as a Public Defender; his time at the Academy; then in LAPD. When he first met Kensi at that MMA gym. He thought about the time he spent with the NCIS and the time spent with Kensi. How he felt when she was in Afghanistan. Lost and disoriented. He thought about the time he was tortured by Sidorov. His thoughts flipped to his recent memories of the time when he was kidnapped by Tanevski and held in that house in West Hollywood.

Tanevski.

Tanevski killed David Lucas. He was his friend, no matter how much he hurt him long after he vanished from his life. He shot Callen. He tried to kill him. He shot an FBI agent. And Tanevski was the reason why he froze during his arrest.

He wiped his face with the tissue he found on the table. He stood up and that's when he found out that his cell was in the left pocket of his jacket. He left the Boatshed.

He remembered a quote he head once somewhere "Nothing is accidental. Everything happens for a reason". He entered in the car.

"Hey, what took you so long?"

"I left my cell phone on the couch and it somehow fell in the space between the pillow and the couch."

"Okay. Are we ready to go?"

"Yes. But, I want to go home."

"Hetty said…"

"I know what Hetty said. I'm not feeling well Kens. I'll call her."

"Your wish my command detective Deeks."

Kensi put the SRX in gear and left. Hetty and Hope left the Boatshed seconds after Kensi and Deeks did.

Kensi noticed that Deeks was moody again, but it was understandable. Deeks wasn't the same anymore. Well, he wasn't the same since they got the case few months ago, but the case became personal and it was eating Deeks on the inside. She felt that he will hurt himself if he continued to blame himself for everything that happened to them so far. And the interrogation by the DOJ was closing in.

Deeks closed his eyes as he felt the breeze lightly touch his face. He replayed all of the things that happened so far from 27th of December.

He prepared himself for what was going to happen next.

…


	18. Suspended

**Chapter 18 – Suspended**

* * *

**The reference 'Bolen Dojchin' is from a song with the same name that was written by the people and later on as our culture developed was gathered in a book by a man that gathered songs written by the people, a.k.a. songs from unknown authors.**

* * *

Half an hour later everyone was at the bullpen, shuffling with paperwork, all except Deeks. They were eager to know why Hetty called them all to come to the bullpen today. There certainly wasn't a case, so that meant only one thing: the DOJ.

Hetty entered in the Mission together with Hope, but the team didn't notice them and she startled them like she always did. The nickname 'little ninja' wasn't given to her for nothing.

"Lady and gentlemen."

"Geez Hetty." Callen jumped. "You need to stop doing that."

"I need to keep your wits sharp Mr. Callen. You'll never know when a suspect will sneak up on you like I did now. You need to be prepared." She whispered the last sentence and that made the situation creepier than it already was.

"She has a point G." said Sam grinning.

"Same goes to you Mr. Hanna."

Sam's grin died. "What's this all about Hetty?"

"Where is Mr. Deeks?"

"Yeah, where is he Kens?" Callen asked his younger colleague.

"He wasn't feeling well and I drove him home."

"I told him that he should stay home, but no, he needed to come to the Boatshed." Yelled Hope. "His temperature popped up again yesterday."

"Hetty, can I go and be with Deeks'?" asked Kensi.

"Of course you can Ms. Blye. But first let me tell you the news and then you can all go home. You are dismissed."

The fact that Hetty considered Deeks' apartment as her home, surprised Kensi. But why she should be surprised? It was Hetty, after all.

"What news?" asked Callen.

"I've got information that the DOJ will send its team of investigators tomorrow. I stalled them as much as I could, but you know the bureaucrats Mr. Callen."

"I'm a bureaucrat Henrietta." Said Granger from behind Hetty.

"You two are hanging around each other too much." Said Sam.

"Oh, you are pain in the ass of a bureaucrat Owen, but you are a good pain in the ass. And useful. The ones that are coming are predators. They'll eat Mr. Deeks. He is in a fragile state of mind right now, and they can break him easily." Said Hetty eyeing Callen.

"Why do you say that Hetty?" asked Kensi baffled by Hetty's comment.

"Because of what happened to him Ms. Blye." Hetty answered, sadness evident in her voice, mixed with mystery and enigma.

Kensi let go of that matter for now, but she was determined to find out what Hetty and Callen kept under wraps about Deeks. The looks they exchanged, and the cryptic words, plus Deeks' current mood…

"And be sure to tell Mr. Deeks about tomorrow."

"We will." Said Callen, his messenger bag already on his shoulder. "Come on guys. We need to visit Bolen Dojchin."

"Where did you get that?" asked Hope smirking.

"I researched the Macedonian culture a little and this one popped up in between the delicious dishes and the dashing architecture."

"You have to come and see it with your own eyes. You'll want to come back again and again."

"Someday maybe, why not?" Said Callen. "I'll drive today big guy."

"You go. I'll join you later. I need to see Michele. Something about Kamran's project on school."

"Say 'hello' to my niece." Callen teased.

"Okay Uncle Callen." Sam teased back, laughing.

"I'll come by later Kens. Bye."

"Bye."

"I think that Sam is more married to Callen than he is his wife." Said Hope.

"Yeah. Remind me of that 'Ladies night' you planned Hope. I need something that will keep my head out of this mess."

"Maybe for the weekend."

"Good idea."

…

* * *

**-31****st**** of March-**

Deeks woke up in the middle of the night to a nightmare, screaming. His screams woke up Hope too and she instantly came to his room.

"Hey, what's up?"

"A nightmare."

"Here, drink." Hope poured some water from the pitcher on the nightstand.

"Thanks."

"You don't have to thank me Marty. That's what the cousins are for."

Deeks smiled and laid down on the bed, and closed his eyes to ease the pain behind them.

"Marty?"

"Mmm?"

"You want me to stay with you?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. Then move your butt to the right side. I'm lefty which means I will sleep on the left side."

"Okay." He said half asleep. "I sleep on the right side anyway."

Hope laid down and put her hand on Deeks' shoulder. She couldn't help, but think how much her cousin and her late husband looked alike. Same blonde curls, same height, same eyes…

Her cousin was like a big kid while sleeping. She figured that he hadn't much of a sleep in the household he grew up, nor as a teen. His life was full of bad things and he cherished the happy moments. He also appreciated the presents that people gave to him.

A simple man, detective Marty Deeks.

…

* * *

Hope woke up in Deeks' bed and it took her few seconds to remember what happened. She noticed that he wasn't there. She looked at her wrist watch. 8 a.m.

"I overslept. Oh, bugger."

"You sound like Hetty, Hopes."

"Marty, where were you? Why didn't you wake me up?"

"You were sleeping so peacefully, I didn't want to ruin the moment. Come on I prepared a breakfast."

"In a minute mom."

Hope's minute lasted half an hour.

"Why that grumpy face Hopes?"

Hope clutched her stomach with one of her hands. "It's that time of the month again."

"Ugh. Come on, sit down. You want a glass of milk or something?"

"Nuh-huh. Do you have a Coke in there somewhere? It always helps me with the pain."

"Yes I have. Not a milk drinker I guess."

"You got that one right."

The rest of the morning Hope was laying on the couch.

"Hope! It's time."

"I'm coming." Hope moved like a robot. The pain was blinding. "I hate all of this. I'm always moving in slow motion like this."

"It will pass Hopes." Deeks said reassuringly with a smile.

The rest of the drive to the Boatshed was quiet.

When they arrived they found Hetty, Kensi, Callen, Sam and Granger (in that order) standing arms crossed.

"What's up guys?" asked Deeks.

"They're heating the oven." Said Callen watching the live feed on the screen.

The DOJ team was establishing a tripod with a camera. They were shuffling through papers and looked completely out of space.

"Kensi, I retreat my words about your place."

"What words?"

"Compared to these guys, you are the most organized person on Earth I know."

They all laughed at Deeks' comment.

"God knows what they were doing before coming here. I mean, I know that they are in the interrogation room literally 30 minutes and they still don't have the clue as to why they are here."

"We're here to question all of you agent Callen including Ms. Brandel that isn't part of the NCIS yet." Said the lead investigator. "And since you volunteered can we start from you?"

Callen shrugged his shoulders and followed the man.

"Oh boy we're in serious trouble." Said Deeks. _Actually, I am_, he thought, but didn't say it out loud.

…

* * *

"So Agent G. Callen one of the best field agents the NCIS ever had in its history. You have an impeccable file, every mission finished in a record time. You put lots of bad guys in jail. What made Kristijan Tanevski so special that you couldn't catch him? You chased him for three months. I have information that he shot you. Is it true?"

"Yes. I was shot and one of my team members was kidnapped."

"I'm well aware of that too agent Callen. So, answer my question."

The son of a bitch was stepping on Callen's nerves.

"I don't know what makes him special. Why don't you ask him that question?"

"I'm asking you."

"Well, I don't know okay?"

"Okay. So, Kristijan Tanevski killed David Lucas on December 25th 2014 few blocks from his house. How did you find out it was him that put the bullet in Lucas' body?"

"We first thought it was Marcos Ruiz, David Lucas was his protégé back in the day. But, after an encounter with Ruiz we switched the angle of the case and started investigating Michael Leland a.k.a. Kristijan Tanevski."

"When you first got the case, your Tech Operator Eric Beale uncovered files on Lucas' computer. Lots of pics from detective Deeks including your team."

"Yes, that's right. David Lucas was gathering information about detective Deeks. Later, we've got the information that Kristijan Tanevski asked for that particular favor."

"Mhm. Why didn't you pull detective Deeks from the investigation then agent Callen?"

"I thought that there was no need for me to extract him from my team. Plus he knew the initial case better than anyone else."

"You mean his infiltration as Max Gentry in the arms dealing business, to be exact in Marcos Ruiz's group."

"Yes. He went undercover as Max Gentry for six months in 2006. He knew that there was a big fish that pulled the strings. Just when he was about to uncover the identity the LAPD stormed in, arrested all of them and closed the case. They never got to know who the man was."

"I guess they found out."

"I guess they did."

"You need to stop the irony agent Callen."

"You first." Callen smirked.

"You didn't pull detective Deeks from the case when you discovered his involvement in the case. That I can understand. But, what I don't understand is why you didn't pull him out when his best friend Ray was kidnapped by Tanevski? Instead of ordering him to stay in LA you took him with you in Georgia. Like a lost puppy."

"Don't you dare, to call him that name. He is one of my team members. If we go, he goes and vice versa. It was his friend and he wanted to help us with the case."

"You didn't do what was requested from you agent Callen. Such a lousy team leader."

"Listen you, son of a… You are not here to question my leadership skills. Either do your job or stop insulting me and act like you are the superior. I'm sure that you never even laid a foot on the field. If you have worked on the field, you would've known what it's like to be in the line of fire every single day. I made an assessment and in my opinion detective Deeks was ready to do his job then, he is ready to do his job now. He is more competent than any of you here will ever be. Now, this conversation is over."

"This conversation is not finished yet agent Callen."

"For me it is."

…

* * *

"That was damn close G. But, you showed them darn well who the boss is."

"Mhm." Hetty cleared her throat.

"Apologies Hetty, you are the boss."

"That's better Mr. Hanna." Hetty smirked.

"Ms. Lange you are next." Said one of the investigators, a young man.

"Go get them Hetty." Said Hope, grin on Hetty's face.

"You were thinking go get them tiger." Said Deeks with a chuckle.

"Hetty is more of a lion Deeks." Sam said in his SEAL voice, but he couldn't help, but smile at the comment.

"Mother Goose." Said Callen.

"Ladies and gentlemen can we please stop the Animal Kingdom game and focus, please." Granger said in his grumpy voice.

"Relax cousin nothing is gonna happen."

"Ms. Blye are you going all Tom and Jerry on me?"

"She is definitely going Tom and Jerry on you Granger." Deeks said grinning.

That eluded a smile from Granger, too, but the tension was still present.

…

* * *

"Henrietta Lange. Manager of the Office of Special Projects for the Naval Criminal Investigative Service in Los Angeles. Former CIA. Some say you are a legend."

"I'm guilty as charged."

"What can you tell me about detective Deeks Ms. Lange?"

"I prefer Hetty. And I can talk about Mr. Deeks all day long, but I don't think you are interested in all the things I have to say about him. I see that you made up your mind already. Why bother to talk to you about him?"

"Because of his actions one FBI agent was wounded. What if he died Ms. Lange?"

"I'm sorry about what happened to the agent, but I tend to keep mine."

"I need to know about detective Deeks' state of mind."

…

* * *

"I want to kill that arrogant SOB." Said Callen.

"Stand in line agent Callen." Said Granger.

…

* * *

"What about that?"

"Was he sane when this case started? Throughout the whole case?"

"Are you implying that one of my agents is crazy?"

"He is an LAPD detective, not an agent Ms. Lange."

"Being a detective doesn't make him less good than my other agents."

"Answer my question!" the lead investigator yelled.

…

* * *

"You just don't yell at Henrietta Lange." Said Sam.

"She'll make him regret he did." Said Callen.

…

* * *

"He was sane! He is sane! He is one of the best! He made a mistake? Yes! The FBI agent got shot? Yes! Mr. Deeks froze? Hell yes! He isn't the only one that did that. I had the exact same experience once, Sir!"

The lead investigator actually ran out of words after Hetty's screaming. He adjusted his tie. The room was getting smaller and smaller with Hetty in it every moment. She had that effect on people. On Arkady for example.

"Tell agent Hanna that he is next."

…

* * *

"What's the first thing that comes to your mind about detective Deeks agent Hanna?"

"Respect."

"And why is that?"

"Because that man saved my life too many times. Saved my wife's life when he had no obligation to do that. He is one hell of an operative and he is a great member of our team."

"You speak highly of him."

"He is my friend. And my brother. I'd die for him. I know he'll do the same for me. I know that he made a mistake on that roof, but it happens. I don't see why all of this? Why ruin his life now? Why question his actions…?"

"Agent Hanna because of his actions a man was hurt."

"With all due respect, because of him thousands of lives were saved from the savage beast Tanevski is."

…

* * *

The lead investigator was fuming by the time Sam left the room and Granger took his place.

"Owen Granger. Long time no see."

"I wasn't exactly eager to see you. So, cut to the point Doc and let's finish this shit. My wife is waiting me for lunch."

"I thought you divorced after Alden died."

"Well this is a new one. And she is madder than Charlene ever was."

"Okay. I have information here that detective Deeks…"

"Detective Deeks is a nice young man. Believe me, he irritates me with his jokes and goofy behavior, but the kid is a professional Hell, the cops didn't have any clues for Alden's murder for years. He cracked it in no time."

"But what he did in Georgia…"

"What happens in Georgia stays in Georgia. Or was it Vegas, Doc?" Granger teased.

Doc scoffed at Granger's comment. Owen Granger knew something about him that no one else knew. He knew that Doc had gambling problems and that he spent his weekends and days off in Vegas. And Owen Granger always knew when to push the right buttons.

"I see that all of you give me the same answers. Deeks this, Deeks that… Detective Deeks isn't an angel Owen."

"Neither are we Doc. All of us have our demons. No one said that he is an angel. We just state the facts. It's up to you to and your buddies here to decide what you'll do with his future. But, I think that when the same thing is spoken over and over again by the people it means something, don't you think?"

"We're finished Owen." Doc cut him. "Next for questioning is Ms. Brandel."

…

* * *

"Ms. Brandel, how long are you in LA?"

"Since the end of December 2014."

"And the reason for it?"

"I chased Tanevski from Macedonia for crimes he committed there. He escaped here so I followed his trail."

"You called it a joint operation with the NCIS."

"Yes. Hetty called my supervisor and explained the situation. Told him I'll be working with the NCIS on this matter."

"Not long after Ms. Lange offered you a job. To become a federal agent."

"Yes. And I accepted the offer. But, I'm still not an official agent."

"I came across the information that you and Mr. Deeks are cousins."

"Yes we are."

"I'm guessing you'll start with the superlatives, too."

"Listen Sir, I've known Marty Deeks for how long, three or four months now? I don't know what he was or what he did before I came to LA. What I know is that he has a wonderful soul. And you are doing a mistake with this questioning."

"Let that decision to me Ms. Brandel. Tell me what happened on the 16th of March 2015 on the roof of North Georgia Medical Center?"

"I don't know what happened on the roof. I wasn't there to back up my cousin and the team thanks to Kristijan Tanevski that knocked me out."

"You think that the events that happened these past months caused detective Deeks to freeze in place?"

"I can't answer that question Sir."

"Stubborn people."

"It's in our blood."

"Ha-ha, very funny."

…

* * *

"Agent Blye, you were there on 16th of March on the roof. Tell me what happened."

Kensi replayed all of what happened just couple of weeks prior.

"Tanevski was talking, I don't know what exactly, and I couldn't read his lips."

"Oh, you are a lip reader."

"Yes. And a good one."

…

* * *

"Humble brag." Erupted in the Boatshed, Deeks, Callen and Sam speaking at the same time.

…

* * *

"Go on."

"He was talking. Deeks, I mean detective Deeks replied to what Tanevski had said. He pointed the gun at Tanevski. Tanevski shot the FBI agent. Then he aimed close to Deeks' head. That's when I took the shot. I shot him in the shoulder and cuffed him."

"Mhm. And why do you think detective Deeks froze?"

"I don't know. You have to ask him that."

"You love him, don't you Agent Blye?" Doc asked her.

The question caught Kensi off guard and she stared at Doc for few moments. Just when she opened her mouth, Doc cut her off. "You don't have to answer that one agent Blye. You are dismissed."

…

* * *

Doc and his colleagues joined the team and they felt the hostility that radiated form them.

"We'll continue after lunch." Doc stated.

Deeks' earlier joy disappeared when he saw the determination look in the lead investigator's eyes.

"Deeks…"

"Yeah Callen?" Deeks answered absentmindedly.

"Come with us. We are going to grab something to eat."

"I don't want to eat anything."

"You are refusing a fish taco? I'm buying."

"Okay then."

"That's my boy." Callen said slapping Deeks on the back.

…

* * *

"Come on detective Deeks. It's your turn."

Deeks took few shaky breaths before he entered in the interrogation room. It was odd to be seated on the opposite side of the table. The fears Deeks had just one year prior came true, but this time it wasn't because of his partner why he was there. It was because of his actions. Because he froze in place on that roof. Because of him a man was shot, an FBI agent that was saving lives and protecting people, just like him. The guilt was overwhelming, but the conversation he had with Callen helped him a lot.

They were working on their relationship as friends and colleagues. It took Callen too much time to realize Deeks' potential and his contribution to this team, but after all that happened, Callen finally was able to accept him as a part on their family.

"My name is Josiah Gordon and these are David Shell, Emilio Monterey and Christopher Wilson. We are conducting the investigation on the events that happened on 16th of March 2015 on the roof North Georgia Medical Center."

"Nice. Tell me something I don't know."

Josiah was surprised by the young man's enthusiasm.

"Can I call you Doc Scurlock?" Deeks asked and a lighthearted laugh escaped from Emilio. Josiah just looked at him while thinking of what to say.

The same nickname Owen Granger used on him. Called Doc twice in one day. That can't be good.

The kid is nice indeed.

Deeks knew he touched a nerve and that he pissed off the lead investigator, but he was in a good mood today.

"He kinda looks like Buster McHenry too." Emilio said referring Josiah.

"Both characters are played by the same actor, that's why." Deeks said with a big grin on his face.

Everyone watched the conversation from the big screen in the Boatshed and smiled when they recognized the old Deeks.

"Listen to me detective. I was born way before 'Young guns' and 'Renegades'. Don't you dare to tease me about that ever again. Owen is enough. Besides, I'm more beautiful than the actor that played both characters."

…

* * *

"Classic narcissist." Said Callen. "The fact that he watched the movies says it all."

…

* * *

"You've had a rough childhood detective. Your father beat you whenever he had a chance."

"That's none of your damn business."

"Damn well it is detective. I have to look at every traumatic experience that made you not to pull the trigger when you had to."

Deeks was looking in Josiah's direction, but it seemed like he was looking through him. Just when he thought the past was behind him, bam here we go again.

"What's up detective? Unpleasant memories?"

The way Josiah mocked Deeks and the tone he used made Deeks to want to throw up the fish taco he just ate.

"You don't know what it was like so cut to the point, okay?" the hurt was evident in Deeks' voice.

"You had rough childhood detective. Rough life."

"What do you care?" spit Deeks.

"You put your way through high school and college all alone. You worked as a Public Defender. You enrolled in the Academy, graduated top out of your class. You worked patrol first, and then you applied for a detective. After few months on the job you became an undercover officer."

"What does all of that have to do with the events in Georgia Doc?"

"Stop calling me that."

…

* * *

"He's throwing you off your game Doc." Said Callen smirking.

…

* * *

"Assessment detective. Assessment of your ability to continue to be an officer of the law. How all of these events affected the income of the situation in hand."

"Okay." Deeks' voice was barely above a whisper.

"I've heard about you take a beating from fellow colleagues at the LAPD in the past."

"Yes, it's true."

"Someone needs to learn the hard way."

"What do you mean by that?"

'What I mean is that you weren't appreciated much in your life. First your family, then your coworkers. You don't have any friends do you? Are you afraid to let them to look close into you? To get to know you better? Or because you are one son of a bitch that needs to be punished for what he was for what he is?"

…

* * *

"This is getting personal." Said Callen afraid of what will come next out of Josiah's mouth.

"He is testing the ground agent Callen."

"What do you mean by that Granger?"

"Deeks was broken so many times in his life, that he even lost the count. Josiah is trying to break him to get his weaknesses on the surface. Then he'll find a damn good reason why Deeks froze on that roof."

"You have a point. But, how far will he go?"

"That, I don't know agent Callen."

…

* * *

Like expected Josiah changed the course of the questioning once more.

"You endured a torture in the hands of Isaac Sidorov. You weren't able to come back to work for months."

"What's that got to do with the events that happened in Georgia?"

"It has a lot to do detective. It will help us understand why you froze when you had the clear shot to take Tanevski. Is it because of what he did to you that you went stone cold on that roof?"

"He didn't do anything to me."

"I have a different information."

…

* * *

At that moment Hetty and Callen looked at each other with a knowing look waiting for the ticking bomb to explode.

…

* * *

"He tried to rape you detective. That looks like a huge issue to me. If I were you, I would definitely hold a grudge against the man."

Deeks had an iron clad mask on his face, hiding his real emotions the best he could. His face expression changed in a second. It wasn't Deeks anymore. It was Max.

"Who told you that?"

"It doesn't matter."

"It does matter, Doc!" Deeks yelled.

Deeks suddenly got up and slammed his fist on the table.

"Calm down detective!"

"You started this one and you will listen to me to the end! And I am calm, just so you know. I survived the beatings of my father, yes! I don't know how, but I did. You have the records there, you read them, but you don't know what it was like to wake up every day and wait till your father drinks the bottle to the bottom and kick you till you can't breathe. You don't know what it was like to put yourself up through life! You don't know what it takes to pass the Bar and graduate from the Academy in a record time. You don't know what it was like to see your colleagues every day and to know that they think they are better than you.

"They beat me up, it's true, and I took that beating because I wasn't strong enough to report them. I was afraid they'll kill me. Do you know what it was like to go to work every day and watch behind your back every step on the way?"

"Maybe you deserved it!" stated Josiah in a high pitched voice.

Deeks felt like someone slammed a rock in his face. Unwanted tears appeared in his eyes and they clouded the scene in front of him. He blinked them back. He didn't know how he found the strength to continue.

"I'M NOT FINISHED!" he screamed. "So, stop talking."

The fear in Josiah's eyes was starting to creep up. Not good.

"I endured the torture. I wasn't able to come back to work after that, yes I admit that was the case. I thought of quitting the force, but then I thought of all the people that needed me and all of the things I have yet to do in life. I wanted to kill myself in that moment. I felt worthless.

"Of course you don't know anything about how I felt. You weren't there when it all happened. The only thing you know is what you have in those papers. Well let me tell you, Doc, that it takes more than a piece of paper to know about a man. Don't judge the book by its cover." he stopped himself and gathered his feelings. "He tried to rape me, yes, but it was just that, attempt of rape nothing more. He didn't do anything that clouded my judgment. And you have no right to ask me about that intimate part of my life you asshole." (Pause) "I'm sorry I didn't take the shot. I'm sorry that agent got hurt, I really am. I don't know what happened to me in that moment. It never happened before. And if I continue to do my job, it will never happen again."

"I guess there's a first time for everything in life detective." Said Josiah with an irony in his voice. "I think…"

He didn't get to finish his sentence when Granger stormed in the interrogation room, followed by the others.

"What you think doesn't matter anymore. This interview is over! Now get the hell outta here!"

"Owen, you are interrupting our little chit-chat with Marty. Come on don't be party breaker."

"Doc, get your ass out of here before I break something else than your party. I mean it."

Granger now yelled his voice full of despair and anger.

If someone told the team that Owen Granger will defend Marty Deeks with such a force three years ago, they wouldn't have believed them, but it happened. Granger defended Deeks like no one ever had in his life. He was like a father standing up for his kid.

Josiah saw the rage in Granger's eyes and decided that it was better for them to leave. They slowly gathered their things and left the Boatshed.

Deeks' head pulsated with pain. He turned to leave when he felt slightly dizzy. He was going to hit the ground if it wasn't for Sam that caught him in his big hands. He lost it then. Few choked sobs escaped him as he tried to get free from the hold Sam had on him. But, Sam pressed himself closer to him.

"It's okay Deeks. It's okay. It's over. Shhhh."

Deeks suddenly realized that all of them heard about what Tanevski did to him. He felt embarrassed by that fact and he pulled free from Sam's grasp, but Sam hold him down as he let all of his emotions pour through his tears.

He needed all the support he could get from them now, when his secret was uncovered. Nothing stays hidden, Deeks told himself.

"How did they found out about that?" Hetty asked cussing under her breath while she wrestled with her emotions.

It was hard to watch Sam and Deeks in a powerful hug on the floor. Deeks cried out all the pain and grudge he held inside for so long. He appreciated Sam's bear hug. Now all he had to do was to gather himself and get the hell out of the Boatshed.

Kensi kneeled beside them on the floor and caught Deeks by the hand. She gently stroked the back of his hand with her thumb, but he couldn't look at her although her touch calmed him. She finally realized what was wrong with Deeks all that time. Why he flinched when someone touched him. Why he didn't want to make love with her. The sudden change in his attitude. The darkness in his eyes. The quiet Deeks. All of that made sense now when everything was revealed.

Kensi looked in Deeks' eyes and she didn't like the look in them. It was glassy and disoriented. He was looking at her, but through her.

…

* * *

Deeks suddenly returned to normal. He quickly got up and stormed out of the Boatshed. He entered in the Malibu and drove towards the Mission. Hope, Kensi, Granger and Hetty took the SRX, while Callen and Sam followed them with the Challenger.

…

* * *

**Sorry for the cliffhanger, I promise nothing bad will happen in the next chapter, I mean with Deeks going to the Mission. I also planned a meeting between Christine and Deeks. I need to finish that part of the chapter in order to upload it. Enjoy.**

**And the reference to the movies was made because those are two of my favorite movies. And Kiefer is one of my favorite actors. **


	19. Recovery

**Chapter 19-Recovery**

* * *

**Sorry this is a short chapter. I promise the next chapter will have the meeting between Christine and Deeks.**

* * *

_**(From chapter 18)**_

_Deeks suddenly returned to normal. He quickly got up and stormed out of the Boatshed. He entered in the Malibu and drove towards the Mission. Hope, Kensi, Granger and Hetty took the SRX, while Callen and Sam followed them with the Challenger._

…

* * *

Deeks broke few traffic laws on his way to the Mission, but who cared, now that all the hell broke loose.

They were on the edge after they heard what happened to their friend and they were pissed off. Hetty managed to call Nell and Eric notifying them on the situation and Deeks' arrival. They needed to know, so they could fight the battle for their friend.

…

* * *

Nell and Eric tried to stop Deeks, but he yelled "Get out of my way!" before he went straight to the rest room. The team arrived in the Mission shortly afterwards. Nell was shaken by what she witnessed and they found her hugging Eric.

"Where is Mr. Deeks dear?" Hetty asked Nell.

She pointed to the rest room, unable to speak.

They all went there and stood frozen in place as they watched Deeks tearing the room apart, until he found out what he was looking for. He held the bug in his hand, panting, hot tears streaming on his cheeks.

"I guess the case with the mole isn't over." Said Hetty.

"Can someone explain to me what's going on?" asked Callen, agitated.

"Mr. Deeks told me about what happened when he was taken by Tanevski here, in this very same room. That's how the DOJ knew about you know what."

"There wasn't any other way for them to find about it Hetty." Deeks assured her, and looked Callen in the eye.

Callen saw the look in Deeks' eyes. It meant that he trusted him with his story and that he knew that Callen would never tell anyone without his consent. After all the distrust throughout the years that Callen had in Deeks, Deeks hadn't even doubted him.

The events had shaken them all, but he needed to do something before his team fell apart.

Sam took over the situation.

"Hetty can we talk for a second? Alone preferably."

"Of course Mr. Hanna."

Sam followed Hetty to her office and waited for Hetty to pour them both a cup of tea. Sam didn't like Hetty's tea, but he admitted to himself that this time she picked up nice flavor.

"Why didn't you just tell me Hetty? Why Deeks had to go through all of that alone? There wasn't anything to be ashamed of. And it wasn't his fault. He was a victim."

"I thought that Mr. Deeks would tell you all when he was prepared. The DOJ will hear from me for this." Hetty took a deep breath. "I know what will be your next question Mr. Hanna."

"Why did you let Deeks face that man again? We could've gone to Georgia and we could've saved Ray all by ourselves. It's not the first time that we do such a complicated op Hetty. We could've done that, you know. Nothing Deeks did or didn't do would've changed the outcome. We would've gone there with a mission. Josiah had that one right."

"I started this Sam, and I needed to finish it." Deeks said. "I know you all think of me as the weakest link in our team and you are right, I was weak. I wasn't strong enough then and Tanevski used that situation to carry out his plan. But, when I heard that he captured Ray, I couldn't let him win. I couldn't let him hurt Ray, like he did with me. He hurt too many people Sam. I needed to finish what I started. Do you understand?"

"Yes, I understand."

Deeks slowly walked to the bullpen followed by Hetty and Sam. The rest of the team, Granger and Hope were there waiting for him. When he came they all took turns to hug him and whisper reassuring words. When they finished doing that, he sat on his desk and told them the story. He couldn't bear to look them in the eyes, but he kept his voice even and firm. He was done with crying. He told them everything with a straight face.

After he finished his story, he started leaving, but Callen stopped him.

"Deeks you have a minute?"

"Sure."

"I just want to say thanks."

"For what?"

"For trusting me. I know I wasn't very helpful when you first came to the team and I didn't trust you. You on the other hand never suspected me. I could've easily told someone."

"You don't have to thank me Callen. You are too honest a man to give away that information easily."

"Night Deeks."

"Night Callen."

Deeks left the Mission alone, not expecting company. But his (annoying) cousin came running after him.

"Just when I thought I was free from you…" said Deeks with one of his trademark lopsided grins, rolling his eyes.

"No man has ever escaped Hope's justice, Mister Counselor."

Deeks chuckled and they left in his Malibu.

…

* * *

Hope was determined to make her cousin happy. She noticed that even after Deeks' and Kensi's thing evolved, they weren't that happy in their relationship. She found out the reason why just couple of hours before. And now she was struggling to find a way to fix that.

She finally pulled her phone out of her pocket and she texted Kensi.

*whats up lady?*

*im home. you need smth?*

*yup. i think you should come over. bring some beer and yummy yummy heart attack.*

*some drunken pigs, huh?*

*whatever youll bring will be fine.*

*why are you asking me this?*

*marty needs smth to lift him up, you know the happiness hormone, dont remember its name.*

*serotonin.*

*right.*

*ill b there in 20.*

…

* * *

Kensi rang the door bell just in time. Hope had left, saying that she was going to visit Hetty in one of her houses. She didn't mention which one, but it wasn't important. She left the lovebirds alone.

Deeks opened the door and saw Kensi standing there, six-pack of beer in one hand and Yummy Yummy Heart Attack in the other.

"I thought you were hungry." Kensi smiled.

"You thought or you were told I was hungry?" Deeks winked at her leaving the door open for Kensi to get in. "I guess Hope is a mastermind when it comes to this."

"What do you mean Deeks?"

"Arranging a date between two lovers."

"I guess that's in your blood."

"What's in our blood?"

"You are both hopeless romantic personas."

"Maybe just hopeless." Deeks grinned as he stole the drunken pig from Kensi's hand.

"Hey that's not fair. You just stole my line, and now you stole my pig."

"You need to sharpen your senses Special Agent Blye." Deeks said. "Or I could eat all of the drunken pigs and you won't even feel me, let alone see me."

"Haha, that's very romantic."

"To me it is."

"La palabra de un ladrón." Kensi shot on Spanish.

"Uno de los mejores." Deeks replied.

…

* * *

Deeks sat on the couch for the longest time before he turned towards Kensi and spoke.

"Kens, please make love to me."

They hadn't made love for a long time, and she was surprised from his request. After today's revelations, she wasn't sure if he was asking it so he could get over it or he really liked it.

"Please. Help me forget. Help me forget everything that happened."

Kensi looked at his blue eyes and that puppy look he had on them was more than convincing. She stood up and led the way to the bedroom. Deeks followed her. She was careful not to cause Deeks to jump. She took off her jacket and she carefully removed his. She unbuttoned his shirt and let it slide through his shoulders and onto the floor. She quickly threw off her clothes leaving only her bra and panties. She reached for the belt on Deeks' jeans when she felt him jerk at her touch. She let him to take off his jeans by himself, not wanting to make him uncomfortable. He looked like a kid that was caught with his hand in the cookie jar with the embarrassed look on his face. When they both were only in their underwear, Kensi smiled seductively as she placed a kiss on Deeks' lips. He closed his eyes remembering how much he missed her kisses and her smile.

Then she flipped behind him and she started to massage his shoulders. The tension he felt the whole day finally was starting to wear off and he relaxed. Kensi's touch was warm and welcoming and he wished he could stay like this forever, Kensi by his side.

Kensi's hands trailed off his shoulders and he felt them going up and down his back. Deeks was in a full mood for the assignment in front of him. He opened his eyes and was thankful that the dark memories were slowly fading. She took his face in her hands and gently placed small kisses over it. Then she let him undo her bra and she let the panties slip away. He undressed fully and he took her in his hands, kissing her softly.

They made love and then they fell asleep peacefully, entangled. Together and protected for eternity.

Kensi was happy because she got the old Marty Deeks back. Deeks was happy because he was able to overcome all that happened to him during these month, and that he was able to bury Max Gentry deep down.

…


	20. Ghosts of a chance

**Chapter 20-Ghosts of a chance**

* * *

Christine Deeks was being told everything about her son's recovery by Hetty on regular basis. She strained herself from going to the Mission in front of them, but she couldn't resist the need to see her son.

It was two and a half months since she saw him in the ICU and he wasn't looking well at all.

She grabbed the keys of the white Volvo she owned and she told Rocky where she was headed. He argued about whether she should go to Marty's work place, but Christine was the most stubborn person he knew in his life and he knew it was worthless arguing with her.

Rocky hadn't seen Marty in more than 20 years, and he didn't know how stubborn he could be. He might've reconsidered his thoughts on it.

Like mother, like son, huh?

The first thing she noticed when she parked in front of the Mission was the Jaguar that Hetty drove the day she visited her. Next to Hetty's Jag was parked a black Dodge Challenger, dark blue Mercedes S550, silver Cadillac SRX, and a red Chevrolet Malibu. She figured that the red Chevy belonged to her son because of its color. She still remembered how happy Marty was when she picked him up from school in their red Dodge van. His favorite color might've been blue, but when it came to cars Marty always wanted a red car. He said once that the red color represented the feeling of love he didn't have in the house where he grew up in. His statement stung a little, but she didn't say anything at the time.

She entered in the Mission and stared for a brief moment at the beautiful building. She noticed agent Sam Hanna sitting in one of the chairs surrounded by a man and a woman. She called his name and saw that she surprised him.

Sam quickly turned towards Kensi and Callen that waited for Sam to tell them who the woman was. Callen could see how similar facial features she shared with Deeks. Even the mole on his left cheek.

"G, Kens, this is Deeks' mother."

"Christine Deeks." She said as she extended her hand to both agents.

"Special Agent G. Callen and this is Special Agent Kensi Blye."

Callen could see the nervousness on Christine's face and he motioned for Kensi so they can leave her alone with Sam.

"We'll be in OPS if you need us Sam." Callen said.

As they were climbing the stairs Callen whispered in Kensi's ear "Oh boy, Deeks never mentioned his mother was still alive."

"HE never mentioned her to ME either, Callen."

"Maybe his memories aren't pretty."

"Yeah."

…

* * *

Sam motioned for Christine to sit down in one of the chairs. They had a little talk when she stood up.

"Where's Hetty's office?"

"There." Sam showed her and she headed towards it.

…

* * *

"Ms. Deeks." Hetty said cheerfully when she saw Deeks' mother approaching her.

"I came here to see what's going on with my son Hetty." She said.

"Oh a lot of things happened to him Ms. Deeks. You want a cup of tea?"

"Yeah, sure."

Hetty put the teapot on the heater and as she placed the tea in the boiling water she planned her moves.

They talked about the many goofy things Deeks did through the years to make them happy. Hetty wasn't the type that would reveal that kind of information to Deeks' estranged mother, but she felt that it was her duty to make Christine feel better.

…

Deeks was punching the bag in the gym for an hour now since he arrived at the Mission. He was wondering why Hetty had called them all. She was having a good reason for it, but she was keeping them in the shadows for now.

…

* * *

**-Couple of hours earlier-**

* * *

**Callen's house**

* * *

"Good morning Agent Callen." Joelle chirped as she placed a kiss on Callen's cheek.

"Good morning Jo."

"Your boss called."

"Hetty?"

"Who else?"

"Is this April Fool's Day joke?"

"Nope honey. I learned very early that you are not a guy that would take a joke for 1st of April very well."

"What did she say?"

"She said that you have to go to work."

"Today?"

"Yes. She was very precise. And scary."

"Hetty is like that. And I thought that today was my day off. I better shower."

…

* * *

**Deeks' apartment**

Deeks slowly opened his eyes. He got up and walked to the kitchen. He spotted Hope at the table where she was placing plates and forks. She was making the traditional American breakfast, bacon and eggs. She made fresh coffee and she placed toasted slices of bread, and butter on the table. She also made a fresh orange juice and to add to the detail she put fresh flowers in the vase that she placed on the center of the table. She did all that while she was listening to Daughtry, Bon Jovi and her favorite Macedonian band Next time. She was humming lyrics on her own language and she didn't notice Deeks. He thought he should get back to Kensi and leave Hope do what she intended to do.

He quickly went back to bed and smiled at the sleepy form of Kensi.

"Wake up Sugarbear."

"5 more minutes please."

"Sweetcakes it's 9:30 in the morning."

"What?" Kensi almost jumped as she tried to get up. "We are late. Hetty will kill us."

"Kensi, relax! Today is our day off."

"Silly me, I forgot."

"That's why I'm here to remind you Fern."

She punched him in the left bicep.

"Ouch, that hurt."

"It will hurt more if you continue with the nicknames." Kensi's face grew serious in a moment. "How's your head?"

"It's better. Don't worry I'm a tough guy."

"Well, they almost made you beg yesterday."

"I still wonder who gave them those information. Actually, the question is who put that bug in the rest room?"

"We'll find out."

"I thought we've found the mole, but I guess that he or she still exists."

"Okay. Let's not talk about that. We have a day off so I think we should use it properly. I smelled breakfast."

"My cousin's been busy."

"I'll be sure to thank her. She's done a lot for me and you."

"Indeed."

Deeks and Kensi walked to the kitchen hand by hand where their breakfast waited for them.

…

* * *

Kensi's phone rang while she chewed the last bite of her breakfast.

"Yeah?" she answered almost choking on her food when she heard Hetty on the other side.

"Good morning Ms. Blye."

"Good morning Hetty."

"I need you and Mr. Deeks to come to work. I know this was supposed to be your day off, but something came up. Half an hour in OPS?"

"Half an hour in OPS is it then." Said Kensi. "Guess what lover boy. Our day off just went to hell."

"Shit!" said Deeks with a sick feeling in his stomach.

…

* * *

**The house of Sam and Michelle**

"Michelle where is my brown shirt?"

"In the closet honey."

"I can't find it."

"You can never find your clothes. Some Special Agent hah."

"Honey, don't mock me. I need to go to work. Hetty'll kill me if I'm late again."

"But, we've had a great night. Hetty shouldn't be mad. You were making your wife happy." Michelle smiled seductively.

Kamran entered in their room and interrupted their moment.

"Mom, we'll be late."

"Now sweetie. Here's your shirt honey." She said with a smirk and left their bedroom.

Sam growled. "Some day off."

…

* * *

The morning began great, Deeks waking up to Kensi in his bed, the feeling of peace returning to his mind and heart. He still had some issues to what happened the last few months, but he was learning how to let go of that. Everything was getting better.

But as soon as he stepped in the Office of Special Projects, Deeks felt immediately that something was off. And the uneasiness he felt earlier that morning returned.

Hetty was nowhere to be found.

Deeks went to exercise in the gym while he waited for Hetty to tell them why she called them.

Right after he disappeared somewhere in the Mission, Christine Deeks arrived.

…

* * *

"Tell me Christine, why is that you came here really?"

"Just to see Marty, Hetty. I've been dying to see my son for over two decades now and after I saw him in that hospital there's something inside that tells me my son may need me. Call it a mother instinct."

"You may be right. Mr. Deeks is going through a lot these days and frankly I think that he needs someone else besides his girlfriend in his life. But, I don't know how he'll take the fact that you are back in his life after all these years. I take that Mr. Deeks is very emotional."

"Yeah, well he got that one from me I suppose. His father wasn't a little bit emotional when it came to that. He never said "I love you" to Marty. Instead he was yelling and screaming always saying that Marty wasn't his son, that he was a bastard, good for nothing. He always came up with excuses for what he did to him."

"Almost all child abusers use excuses for what they do Christine. I sense that there's more to this conversation."

"You are right. It's been a long time and believe it or not I hadn't told anyone about it and I have the need to talk to someone."

Christine made a long pause.

"The day Marty shot that bastard was the day I lost my baby. Yes, that's right Hetty, I was pregnant. It was a girl. You know how happy was Marty going to be? He wanted a sister so bad until he was hit by his father for the very first time. Then, he never said a word about a sibling. But nonetheless, he would've liked the baby."

"Probably he didn't want to see another kid experience the beatings he did. What kind of monster beats his pregnant wife to death?"

"Gordon was beyond a monster. I know it will sound awful, but I'm glad that bastard is dead."

"Me too." Hetty said.

"Hetty when did I go wrong? Where is my mistake? I let my son slip away. I lost him. The brightest spot in my life. He was the only good thing that came out of my marriage with that sick son of a bitch and I let him go Hetty. What kind of a mother does that? I should've insisted. I should've gone and searched for him. Look out for him. What every other mother does for her children. Protect them. I should've done something to show him that I cared, that I loved him. All I did was a cover, a mask, so he wouldn't get hurt."

"You still have the chance to fix that Ms. Deeks."

"I don't know Hetty. I've hurt him too much. I don't know if he wants me back in his life."

"Why don't you talk to him and ask him Christine? The case is over now and I don't think that Mr. Deeks has something else to do right now. He was suspended and frankly I don't know what will the DOJ decide on his behalf, but he has plenty of time in his hands. You need to win him back. To earn his trust. Only then you'll be able to forgive yourself."

"I guess."

Hetty and Christine talked some more before Deeks saw them. Hetty said something funny and Christine laughed. They didn't see Deeks coming until he cleared his throat.

…

* * *

**-Couple of minutes before-**

Deeks was getting nervous by the minute. It was the end of his patience. He would go and see why Hetty asked them all to come to work today when it was supposed to be their day off.

His mother was at Hetty's desk and it wasn't a joke for April fool's Day. Hetty and his mother. Really?

Deeks was fuming by the time he came to Hetty's office. He caught them off guard and it seemed like Hetty didn't see him coming. Deeks cleared his throat and called her name.

That's when Hetty raised her head. She looked him in the eyes and saw the anger that was burning in his soul. He was trying hard not to do something that he'll regret later.

Christine turned and she saw her son.

"Marty?"

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"Marty please let me explain…"

"Don't touch me!" Deeks yelled and backed off.

"I just needed to see you, to see that you are alright. I wanted to see my son!"

"You saw me. You can go now."

Callen and Kensi came downstairs, the techs hot on their heels. Together with Sam they gathered in the bullpen and watched the heated argument between mother and son. By now, everyone that worked in the old Spanish Mission stopped with what they were doing. Clearly there was a bomb that was about to explode. And no one wanted to miss out on that.

Hope was in the storage room, but when she heard the yells she came to the bullpen too.

"Guys, what's going on?"

"Shhhh." Callen said.

She stood silently and watched together with them.

"Why are you doing this Marty?"

"Doing what?"

"This! I came here to apologize. Why are you so mean to me?"

"Because you have hurt me! Instead of defending me, you defended my father!"

"I had my reasons why I did what I did!"

"Yeah?! And those reasons are…?"

"I did that to protect you Marty. He would've killed you if it wasn't for my act. You know how he hated momma's boys. If he saw you taking care of me and vice versa, he would've killed you. There are many things I did because of you Marty…"

Deeks looked in her blue eyes and saw sincerity written in them, but he couldn't let his guard down, not now.

"What? You don't believe me Marty?"

"Honestly, I don't know in what to believe anymore mom."

He called her mom. She screamed from happiness on the inside. Her son called her mom. She missed that.

"Be honest with me and yourself Marty. Say what you mean."

"I believe you, if that's what you are asking me. But, I'm sorry mom, I can't let go of all that happened so easily."

Christine's heart broke when Deeks said those words.

"Can we at least try and repair our broken relationship?"

"No! Please don't make me do that. Please don't make me to relive my past. It's been a long time since I've been there. Just stay away from me. I don't need the hurt and the pain. I've managed to get them out of my life completely, and I don't want to remember."

"Marty please…"

"Stay away from me!" Deeks screamed.

Tears stung in his eyes and there was hurt in his words.

He took off and they all heard a car engine in the distance. A minute later Deeks was gone.

Christine couldn't hide her tears. She cried for her failure as a mother and she cried for her failure to repair their relationship. She hoped that Marty would listen this time, but he didn't. He was as stubborn as she was.

Hetty gave her a cup of tea so she would calm down. After she made sure that Christine was good to go, she accompanied her to her car. She came back to the Mission. Her elite team was in the bullpen, pretending to be doing paperwork, when in fact they were all trying to figure out why their friend acted like that.

She received a phone call from the DOJ with good news.

…

* * *

"Ahem." Hetty cleared her throat.

"What's up Hetty?" asked Callen.

"I just wanted to say that the suspension on Mr. Deeks will be lifted sometime this week. I just spoke with the Department of Justice and they told me that there will be punishment for Josiah Gordon. As for Mr. Deeks he can come back to work as from tomorrow morning."

"That's good news Hetty." Said Sam.

"The reason why I called you all today is that we picked up a case this morning that requires your attention."

"We're on it." Said Callen.

"Ms. Jones and Mr. Beale will fill you in."

Callen, Sam and Kensi went to OPS. Hope stayed in the bullpen to do more paperwork.

…


	21. Decisions

**Chapter 21-Decisions**

* * *

Two days have passed since the encounter between Christine and Deeks. He hadn't showed up for work neither yesterday nor today. Hetty was worried because the last time Deeks went into hiding it took him months to get back to normal.

Hetty called Nate and requested immediate help. Someone had to talk with her stubborn liaison officer. Hetty was done with waiting. She took the case that inside held a beloved instrument of Mr. Deeks' that she retrieved during her first visit of Christine's house. She put the case in the trunk of her Jag. She started the engine, pressed on the gas and headed for his apartment.

…

* * *

He was home for two days now. He had a lot of free time to think about everything. When he stared at the wall it would all come back to him. The beatings, the shouting, the screams… The sound of Gordon John Brandel's footsteps on the floor, his smell when he was dead drunk, his slurred words… The slaps on his face. The sound of belt against skin. The blood he tasted in his mouth when Gordon beat him to the pulp. And the worst part of it all was when Gordon said that everything was his fault. If he was a better son nothing of that would have happened. Little Marty always thought so until one day it was enough beatings and cursing and blaming. It felt good to be free, but it came with a price.

He was thinking about his mother lately. He was thinking about the time she actually cared for him. When she wiped the sweat from his forehead when he was burning up with fever. He remembered all those days and nights he missed his mom after he left home. He just couldn't find peace in that house after he shot his father. He was even surprised why Child Protection Services didn't intervene, but when the thought about it, no one truly cared for him to actually know what he did or did not, and he wasn't surprised they didn't go in his house after the shooting. Probably because Gordon was in jail and they thought mother and son will solve the problem between themselves.

Oh, how wrong they were.

Yet, he never lived further than 2 miles from that house. He wanted to go and talk to the woman that gave him life. He wanted to ask her if she had a logical explanation why she acted like she didn't like him at all. 'Cause he felt bad because of that. He thought he caused something to happen between his parents that made them both hate him. He asked himself many times, would he be able to live again with his mother after all that happened to them and his sudden departure? Would she accept him? Were they going to have good lives after all? Whenever he felt like he should enter through the gate, cross the yard and ring the bell, something, an inner voice would tell him to back off and get back from where he came. He clearly didn't belong there, why it should be any different for him now?

If he just knew that all his mother ever did was to protect him from Gordon. She did what she did so Gordon won't lash out at him often. But, he never had the courage to talk to her. He was afraid that if he let her again in his life, the shell he built around himself would break. There was a Chinese wall that Deeks built that protected him from the world and the time he spent in that house. Couple of days ago however, his mother had the chance to explain everything to him, but he wouldn't let her tell him everything. He was afraid. He shut her out once again. Was that the right decision? He could tell she was honest, but why it was so difficult for him to accept that and move on? Was it because he was afraid of feeling pain again. In fact he spent the last 20 or so years to avoid pain.

But, the past always comes back. Always.

He was 11 years old when his adult life began. He left the house he called home and found home in the shelter for homeless people where he used to volunteer regularly. He worked there and helped the big black woman that always had warm approach to him. She didn't have kids on her own so every penny she saved, she gave it to him. She financed his education for two years. When he started high school he studied and worked hard so he can go to college after 4 years. What he didn't know was that the silent guardian angel was detective Rocky Ellison, future husband of Christine Deeks. He always found work for Marty and supplied the shelter with so much needed goods. Only he himself knew what it was to live like homeless, but it was worth the while.

The really hard time came in college. He thought he earned enough for his studies, but his earned money were barely able to cover for his first year. He had to work many different jobs. He remembered the time he was an exotic dancer. Oh man, that was truly embarrassing.

After finishing Law School he started working in the office of the Public Defender. He had his moments in court and in 90% of the cases he was the winner (because his clients were truly in trouble, but not so serious as to spend their lives in jail). Some would say that he would've made it even higher than Public Defender, but those sayings were thrown out of a hundred-stories building, because one day, out of the blue he quit his job. Just like that.

But, what really triggered his memories was a case that landed on his desk one day. A drunk driver ran over a young woman. When he met the guy all the bad days came back to him like a boomerang. He smelled his breath and his clothes and all he could think of was his father. He left the room and never came back. He resigned the next day.

Then he enrolled in the Academy (after much thinking). When they read his name and they pointed out that he graduated in the top five of his class he shined with pride. He wished that his mother was there for him on that day. Not long after he joined the LAPD. His rookie days weren't something special, but he managed to go on with his life day by day. There were cops that really liked him and others that hated him. He ignored them constantly and that made them all the more nervous.

He still remembered the first time his fellow colleagues beat him up because of that. He never told anyone about it, not even his partner at that time. And the man was a nice guy. It wasn't important anymore. "Doc Scurlock" made sure that all of his colleagues now knew about what happened to him.

A year after that event he applied for a detective. He earned the badge and he was starting to gang up when his first undercover assignment came. After that one it came another undercover work, and another, and another… And he started to like doing undercover work, because he was playing someone he wasn't, wearing masks. It was his way of shielding himself even more than he already was by now. He loved his new job better now. He wasn't part of a team, and the minimum contact he had with his colleagues was just like that, a minimum contact. Not a single invitation for after work going-outs, birthday parties, or just gatherings. He once said to his current coworkers that LAPD didn't bring him soup when he was on his own and had the flu. That spoke of the value he had in his working environment. Deeks was sure that if he died on scene one day, no one would even bother to take care of his body and look for his family to give them closure. Somehow, he still wasn't able to resign the force, although there were many indicators that he was a hated cops between his brothers in arms.

He may have loved his job, but he hated his supervisor, Lt. Mark Soriano. All of the undercover work under his wing was either a disaster or left incomplete. Like the one in 2006. The man didn't know how to make a plan. And now after he found out that Tanevski was the one that manipulated him into cancelling the operation he hated him even more. Thank God that Bates showed up. The guy wasn't much better than Soriano with him trusting Deeks enough, but in the end he could see that Bates did worry about him. A little.

Deeks was happy to find out that the NCIS wanted him as a liaison officer. He was smart and understood immediately that the NCIS didn't need a liaison officer, but he accepted the job offer anyway. He needed change. And it was the best decision he ever brought in his life. He wasn't well accepted from the beginning, but now after all these years he realized that the NCIS were his family. He knew that even Sam and Callen realized that he was one of them, but weren't able to admit it. They joked with him, but in fact that was their cover for their feelings. He could see that. He was a great judge of character. Except for his father. He could never see it coming from his father.

He smiled at the thought of the first time he saw Kensi in that MMA gym. He also recalled the conversation he had with Kensi when Callen's "ex-wife" appeared out of nowhere. He told her that she must date him 10 years before she asked his hand for marriage. Well, they were halfway through the deadline. He laughed out loud at that thought.

Those were the good times he thought.

…

* * *

He had a big goofy grin on his face when he heard the doorbell. He got up from where he was seated on the couch and opened the door. He was surprised to see Hetty. He wasn't sure if he wanted to talk to her at the moment. He stood by the door, arms crossed, looking at the small woman in front of him.

"Good evening Mr. Deeks."

"Good evening Hetty. What brings you here?"

"I want to talk to you about two things. The first thing is personal and the second thing is about the job."

"Sure."

Deeks left the door open and entered in his apartment.

"Coffee?"

"No thank you. Can you sit down please, Marty?"

Deeks was deeply touched by Hetty's effort to try to talk to him about the events that unfolded in the bullpen two days ago.

"Listen Mr. Deeks, I don't know from where to begin…"

"From the beginning."

Hetty sighed. "I'm aware that it's been a long time since you left your home and I think that it's time for you and your mom to solve the problem once and for all. I don't want to tell you what should you do, clearly you both are grownups, but I think that you should give Christine a second chance. There are some things that you don't know that can help you to see the situation with clear mind."

"But Hetty…"

"No 'buts' Mr. Deeks Just promise me you'll think about it."

"Okay, I promise."

"And now I have something for you."

The happiness on his face was more than evident when Hetty brought the violin. It was the same violin he had while he was a kid. He was surprised by Hetty. Completely.

"I found this in your old room Mr. Deeks. Christine wouldn't let me in, but I insisted. I found the violin. She told me that Gordon broke the guitar once."

"Yeah. But, I kept the violin hidden from his sight."

"Can you play something for me Mr. Deeks?"

"You mean… You mean now?"

"Yes, now Marty. Play something for good ol' Aunt Hetty."

Ages went by between his last play and today, but as soon as he caught the violin in his hands it was like he never let go of that feeling of peace, which was rare in the household he grew up in. He played a melody that his mother taught him and at that moment there was nothing that could make Marty Deeks stop smiling. He closed his eyes, letting his thoughts wander.

"That was very nice of you Mr. Deeks. You play darn well."

"Thank you Hetty."

"Mr. Deeks I want you to know that whatever you'll decide I'll be with you every step on the way. And about that suspension, I don't know if Hope told you, it's been lifted. I expect you to come back to work as of Monday morning."

"Yeah, I've heard that Hetty. I'll be there I promise. I needed time to think about what happened. That's why I hadn't come to work. Sorry."

For a few moments no one said a word. Deeks broke the silence.

"You said you wanted to talk with me about two things. We've already settled the matter on the first thing. What's the second?"

"Eh, Mr. Deeks, I've been thinking about this a very long time, since the case with the murder of Daniel Langley aka David Lucas presented itself to us."

"Thinking about what?"

"About you and your work for the LAPD both as a cop and undercover. The life wasn't fair with you. Neither was LAPD. I know that my team rejected you from the beginning, but they've learned to respect you and treat you as equal. All of them came to the conclusion that you are important part of the team. You grew on them, but they weren't ready to admit that out loud."

For all that time Deeks listened to what Hetty had to say very carefully.

"What's this all about Hetty? You always start these kind of conversations when you want to say something important."

"You are absolutely right Mr. Deeks." Hetty looked at him quizzically. "I've been thinking of your NCIS agent application Mr. Deeks." Said Hetty "And I think that it's time for you to decide."

Deeks was waiting for this moment to come.

"I want you to become an agent Mr. Deeks. I know that you are a cop and that's who you are and what you do, but you've proven yourself to the NCIS and you worked on the field for so long. I think it's time for you to decide on that matter. My offer is still open." Hetty paused. "Think about it Mr. Deeks. I want your answer as soon as possible."

"I'll think about it Hetty." Said Deeks. "I promise."

"I should get going now Mr. Deeks. See you Monday morning."

"See you. And Hetty?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you. For this conversation, it means a lot."

"You don't have to thank me Mr. Deeks."

Deeks smiled and closed the door.

…

* * *

After the conversation Deeks had with Hetty, he decided that he wanted changes in his life. He was thinking of what Hetty had said about his mother and his liaison position. The fact was that he enjoyed working for the NCIS, but he couldn't let the LAPD down after all. Yet, Hetty was right. They never treated him like they should and undercover assignments often ended with lots of blood and loads of questions.

Deeks took a deep breath. "This is so gonna be a long night." He said to himself as he prepared a fresh pot of coffee.

…

* * *

Deeks finally decided. He took the laptop and wrote few lines on it. He read the text and checked if it was what he wanted and put Bates' e-mail address in the box. In subject he wrote "Important." And he hit sent.

He already made up his mind and there was nothing that would stay on his way this time. Change was good.

That night Deeks slept like he never did before, alleviated from all the hurt and the pain. It was a new start, and his life was turning a new page.

…


	22. Surf

**Chapter 21 – Surf**

* * *

**Sorry for the delay of this fiction. I was having trouble with these final chapters, and I had to think thoroughly how I want to play it out, and I think I figured it out. My left arm is killing me, and actually I had difficulties writing this chapter on the computer. I don't know where the next update will be available. I'll try and bring the new chapter to you soon. Enjoy.**

* * *

**-Saturday, April 4****th****-**

Dr. Nate Getz landed on LAX that Saturday morning straight from a mission in God knows where. He was strict when it came to his undercover work overseas and he wouldn't let his colleagues to know where he went. If he asked Deeks about it, he would've said to him that he was hanging around Hetty too much.

Deeks. That one word made him feel uneasy in the pit of his stomach. Last night Hetty called him and said that he should leave everything behind and get back to LA as soon as possible. Apparently Deeks needed his help. Hetty explained to him everything that happened to Deeks including the brief encounter between Deeks and his mother. Hetty sounded desperate and in the years Nate spent with the NCIS, he never ever had heard Hetty talk like that. She was many things. Desperate wasn't one of those things.

Either way, an order is an order and Nate Getz got in the first available flight for Los Angeles.

…

* * *

Deeks opened his eyes and looked at the digital clock on his night stand. 5 a.m. Last night was tough with the big decision he made. Deeks got up. Hope was still sound asleep in her room. Looking through his closet he saw the surfboard and his swimsuit. He decided it was time to surf. He hadn't done it for a long time and he longed for the waves. Every experienced surfer including detective-soon-to-be-agent Marty Deeks knew that the best waves could be found in the morning. And Deeks was always an early riser. That habit has been present in his life since his childhood.

Deeks wrote a note to Hope, so she won't worry when she wakes up. He packed up his gear and drove off.

He stopped at the beach where he first learned how to surf. He was little over seven years old and after a heated argument between Gordon and Christine, little Mary decided it was time for him to escape. He didn't want to be in the middle when his parents fought.

He wandered off to a beach close to his home.

Deeks was in his car, watching as the waves crashed on one another. The memory came to him all of a sudden. The first time he felt the water hitting his face, the excitement, the joy…

…

* * *

**(Flashback)**

Marty Brandel closed the front door of the house and crossed the yard that led to the gate. He took his bike and drove as far as his legs would give him. He stopped at an unknown beach. He got off his bike and he sat on the sand in a lotus position, legs crossed, and hands on his knees. He closed his eyes and let the sound of the ocean calm him down. He could still feel the blood in his mouth. Gordon broke one of his upper teeth on the left side, he wasn't sure which one. He had some bruises and his stomach ached from the hunger. He hadn't eaten since last night, but he was used to it.

When he opened up his eyes he saw that he wasn't alone anymore. A man and a woman with two little boys were there on the beach. The woman took out two big surfboards and two small ones for the kids. They were all wearing swimsuits and by the look on the elders, little Marty could tell that they were experienced surfers. He remembered that he saw an article about surfing in one of those magazines when he visited his dentist the last time, but when he looked up closely at it, he figured out that surfing was a tough thing to learn.

He watched as the father and the mother took each of their children by the hand and secured the surfboards with a leash. It was midday and the waves weren't as big as in the morning, but it was both easier and safer for them to learn how to ride the smaller waves first. Marty Brandel was amused by the way the kids learned the tricks and how good they were in the water. He wished he could be like them. To have normal childhood.

He continued watching the family while they surfed when they suddenly stopped. Marty figured out that their lesson was finished for that day. The kids took off their swimsuits and put some dry clothes on them. That's when the woman noticed him sitting in the sand, alone. She pointed to her husband in his direction and the man came right at him. For a moment Marty thought of running, but where to? The beach was endless and he forgot how he came to that place.

The man saw the bruises and the split lip on the little boy that sat in the sand. He could see the hurt and the pain in his eyes, and the fear.

"It's okay kid, I'm not gonna hurt you." The man spoke with a strange accent. He held his arms in defensive pose to show his good nature. "My name is Dieter."

"I'm Martin. But you can call me Marty."

"That's cool. Nice to meet you Marty."

'Nice to meet you too, Sir." Marty said.

"I saw you were here when we arrived. You watched as we surfed."

"It seems interesting. Although, I think surfing is hard to learn."

"Have you tried?"

"Nope."

"Where are your parents Marty?"

"At home. Fighting."

"Your father did this to you?" Dieter asked pointing at his split lip.

"Yup."

Dieter swore something on a language Marty didn't understand. Then he got an idea.

"I want to ask you something Marty. Would you like me to teach you how to surf?"

"But, I don't have a surfboard and clearly I don't have a swimsuit on me."

"That could be fixed. One of my kids is roughly your age and with the same proportions. I don't think that he will be against that we take his board and suit. What do you say?"

"Sounds exciting."

"And it will be. Promise."

Dieter took Marty by the hand and presented him to his family.

"Marty, this is my wife Mary. And those are Eric and Alexander."

The kids said "hi" while Mary hugged him and kissed him on the cheek.

"Marty wants to learn how to surf." Dieter announced.

"That's great." Eric said. "But, where is his gear?" he asked.

"We were thinking if your brother would let us use his until Marty buys one."

"Sure, why not?" said Alexander with a big grin on his face. "I don't mind at all." He said.

After that was settled, Dieter took out the swimsuit and gave it to Marty. Then he waxed the surfboard and put the leash on place. Marty was ready for his first lesson.

The first time he came into contact with the waves he fell in love with the ocean. Since then, one of the things Marty loved to do the most, was surfing. He actually smiled and laughed, and enjoyed the time he spent in the water. For a moment he forgot who he was. He let himself to enjoy the life for a little while.

After his little adventure Mary cleaned him up and put Band-Aid on his split lip. Dieter put Marty's bike in the trunk and they dropped him off couple of blocks down, because Marty didn't want them to meet his family. He quickly talked to Ray and told him that if anyone asks about his whereabouts, to tell them he was at his place the whole afternoon.

The rest of the summer Marty continued learning how to surf. Dieter helped him and even got him a board and a swimsuit (that he was hiding from his family). Eric and Alex trained with him too and soon the three boys knew the basics of surfing. Ray covered Marty for the whole time he was out there surfing and actually having fun.

But, then one day Dieter didn't show up. Instead of him, Mary came together with Eric to tell him that Dieter won't be able to teach him how to surf anymore, because he died. He and the older kid, Alex were involved in a car accident and died on scene.

Marty hadn't really understood the meaning of "died and went to Heaven", but he cried while hugging little Eric. The kid was shy before, but now to Marty it seemed that Eric completely shut himself from the rest of the world.

Marty never saw that kid anymore. Not until he came to work with the NCIS, 5 years ago. But, of course Marty Deeks didn't know that Eric Beale was the same kid from the beach. The kid whose father taught him the basics of surfing.

Marty Brandel never forgot what Dieter did for him. He continued to learn new things and managed to keep his secret on the down low. Only Ray knew about it. He promised to himself that he would never give up. And he never did.

**(End of flashback)**

…

* * *

Deeks put on his swimsuit and took out his surfboard. He waxed it and put on the leash. Then he headed for the ocean.

…

* * *

Nate took a cab and went straight to the Mission. He was greeted by Hetty. Only Hetty would be at the Mission this early in a Saturday. They had a brief talk, she explained everything to him to the tiniest detail. She wanted Nate to access the situation and fast. She needed her favorite detective back to the field as soon as possible.

"I'll do my best Hetty."

"I have the information that he is gone surfing at a particular beach."

"The same as the last time I spoke with him." More of a statement than a question.

"Yes."

"I'm on it."

"And Nate?"

"Yes, Hetty?"

"I'm glad you are back."

"Me too."

With that Nate left the Mission and headed for the beach.

…

* * *

It was almost 8 in the morning when Nate spotted Deeks among the other surfers in the water. He was riding some waves that were smaller. He observed him from afar, he didn't want to spook Deeks doing some Hetty stunt.

Deeks sensed that someone was there too, watching him, and not just the surfers. After few tricks on the waves he spotted Nate. But he continued to ride the waves until he couldn't do it anymore.

Nate continued to watch as Deeks landed on the beach and went to his car. Then he lost sight of the detective.

"You know Nate, staring like that could be classified as stalking." A voice behind him said.

Nate turned around and saw Deeks standing right behind him.

"You know, I was afraid that you'd think I hang too much around Hetty if I appeared out of nowhere."

"So, you decided to watch instead."

"That right about sums it up, yeah."

The detective hugged him and they started walking on the beach.

"Good to see you Nate. Where have you been all this time?"

Nate opened and closed his mouth before he said anything that could compromise him.

"Ah, I see. Top secret, orders from Lord Lange."

"Pretty much, yeah." Nate said.

"You have to be more careful Nate. I spotted you right away. I don't say this because I'm a detective, but anyone could've seen you. You need to watch your back man. You could get yourself killed if not, dude." Said Deeks.

"Thanks for the tip."

For a few moments neither Deeks nor Nate said a thing.

"I've heard that you've met your cousin."

"Yeah. She is nice. And she will be an NCIS agent soon. Hetty offered her a job, and she accepted it. She already got work visa and as Hetty said as soon as the case is over she will do her training and she'll become a full time NCIS agent."

"I guess that law enforcement is in your blood."

Deeks chuckled at that. "Nate cut to the point will you? I know that you didn't come all the way down here just to talk about Hope with me. I'm guessing that Hetty called you and told you what happened. Now, you want to talk to me and to make me open up about something that you already know. Am I correct?"

"Yes, you are Deeks. But, let me tell you a thing. Just because I know about it, it doesn't make me feel better because of it. Think about it Deeks. You go undercover in an arms dealing ring you infiltrated years ago. Your cover was compromised before you even knew it. Callen gets shot because of that, but I somehow doubt that bullet was meant for him. You were kidnapped and held for a few hours, but you felt like it was longer. During those hours you tried to escape, but you were re-captured. This time you were almost raped and you fell through the stairs, i.e. you were pushed. Your life was in danger, but you managed to wake up and you continued with your life like nothing happened when in fact it did.

"After that, your best friend from childhood, Ray, was kidnapped by the same man that took you. You went to Georgia, you managed to save his life, and his wife's life, but you were almost killed by an explosion. You spent few days in the hospital. Just when you were about to leave the hospital, Tanevski took you hostage, again.

"But this time you had the chance to put a stop on the whole mess. Yet, you failed to do so, because you stood frozen in place. That's okay, a lot of people in law enforcement experienced that, including myself. Then, you were suspended. Your career was on the line. The questioning ended up bad as I was told and you had encountered your mother the day after. Don't tell me that you are fine, because I can tell that you are not. You want the others to believe that you got past your traumas, but the truth is you have not. Unless you talk about what happened with you with someone else, you'll end up killing yourself or worse, hurting someone you like."

Deeks hadn't seen Nate like that, never. But, he had to admit that all what Nate said was true. He was screaming for help.

"The last time you and me had this kind of talk, I ended up telling you all of the details for the 2006 case."

"Yes, you did. Listen, I'm not asking you to tell me everything that you went through. With all of us knowing what happened to you and that you actually spoke with your coworkers and friends about that… I just want you to talk to me about your feelings and what are you planning to do once you decide to let all those memories go."

"I know about that Doc, but I already told the others what happened to me, and I'm not so sure that I want to relive that experience again."

"You have to do that. You'll see that you will feel better. I can't guarantee you that you will forget completely about it, but you have to try. You have to bury your past and live in the present. You can't go on like this forever. Especially not the Marty Deeks I know."

Deeks thought in himself, _do you know me, really Doc?_ But he refrained himself from saying that out loud and instead he made a promise.

"I'll try Nate. I promise."

"And try to talk with Kensi about you, your past and anything that bothers you. She'll understand. And you need support, remember that."

"Good."

…

* * *

Lt. Roger Bates had his morning coffee in his office. He usually didn't go to work that early on a Saturday morning, but today he went because he was called on a case. He had been briefed on the new case and sent one of his best detectives at the crime scene. He had a manila folder opened in front of him with information about the victim. Like every morning Bates logged in to to check his oncoming e-mails. The first few e-mails were just a regular mail he got every day. But, one particular e-mail caught his attention. An e-mail from Marty Deeks.

He opened the e-mail and started reading.

"_Sir, Lt. Bates, I am truly sorry I have to tell you about this via e-mail, but I resign from the job post detective in the Los Angeles Police Department. I've been thinking of this for a long time, and I think that it's time for changes, so I decided to become a federal agent. It was nice working with you Sir, but I have to move on the next level. NCIS is my home now. _

_Martin Deeks."_

Bates sank further in his chair when he realized that Marty Deeks just quit the force via e-mail. Inventive way to say goodbye to your job. He dialed Hetty's number. She picked up on the second ring.

"Hello?"

"Hetty?"

"My, my, if this isn't Lt. Roger Bates. How may I help you?"

"Can I come to the office?"

"Sure. What's wrong?"

"I need to discuss something with you. I can't do that on the phone."

"Okay. Half an hour?"

'Half an hour, it is. And make sure Deeks isn't there."

Bates hung up. He was very angry right now and nothing anyone said or did could calm him down. He took the car keys and his jacket. He left the station.

Hetty was surprised with what Bates said, but she dropped the matter. Deeks was elsewhere, anyway.

Half an hour later, Bates arrived at the Spanish Mission. He parked his car in front of the maintenance entrance. He entered in it like the Devil possessed his soul. Hetty could see Lt. Bates fuming by the time he managed to find her office.

"Roger."

"Hetty."

Bates gave her a printed copy of Deeks' e-mail. Hetty read it and could see why Bates has been acting strange since he got there. A small smirk appeared on her face. She just prayed that Bates didn't see it.

"Can you tell me what this is? Deeks is quitting the force! He says that he wants to be a federal agent. Did you know about this?"

"Absolutely not. This is surprise for me too."

Although Hetty pushed a few buttons last night, she didn't think that Deeks will decide immediately.

"I don't think so. Knowing you Henrietta, I could swear that you orchestrated this."

"I hadn't done such a thing Roger." Hetty said with a calm voice. "Few years ago, I offered Mr. Deeks to become a federal agent, but he refused. Maybe he changed his mind and finally understood that he belongs here with us. And before you make an accusation be sure to have proof first."

"But how could he do that to the LAPD? He is one of our top policemen."

"You didn't think so four years ago. Yet, he stayed loyal to you and the force."

"My opinion about Deeks changed when I saw him on the field with your agents. He handled himself very well. I can't let this happen."

"Well, I don't see a way how can you prevent that from happening Roger. Mr. Deeks is an adult and he made a choice. If he wants to quit the LAPD then he will. He is a determined man and nothing will stop him from doing what he wants. I've seen that already."

Bates saw that if he continued to argue with Hetty about this matter, he will lose the battle. And it looked like he lost the war already.

"Fine."

Bates stormed out of the Mission and as soon as he came back to the station he put Deeks' resignation in the system.

Officially one of his best cops was out of the game.

…

* * *

**-A week later-**

Hetty was smiling when she saw Deeks in the bullpen alongside Callen and Sam. Kensi wasn't around. She didn't see Hope either, but she was sure that both of them were fine. She decided to tell them all the good news. Deeks' application to become a federal agent has been granted by Owen Granger personally, and he was officially the new (old) member of the team.

Hetty notified them on Deeks' decision few days earlier. All of them were surprised.

Kensi thought that Deeks was never going to accept to be a federal agent, but she was glad that at the end he did. Of course he hadn't shared the job offer with her, but she wasn't picking locks for no reason either.

Sam was surprised from Deeks once more. He concluded that it was the best Deeks could do. It was a long time since he came to the team. 5 years and counting. He came in as experienced undercover operative with the LAPD. Sam was tough on him, refusing to admit that he liked the new kid. He came to appreciate Deeks and his abilities after Deeks' decision to blow his cover so he can save his life in the line of duty, especially after the treatment he received from Sam. And he endured a torture in the hands of a deadly Russian without blowing his wife's cover.

Maybe Callen was the person that regretted his actions the most and the least surprised from the three of them. He never showed Deeks what he truly felt, that behind his mask of distrust was hidden the fear of bonding with another person like he did with Dom. He still remembered the time he filled the report on Dom being missing. He still remembered the feeling when he wrote "Missing in Action" in the form, and few months later replacing it with "Deceased". He didn't want to have to do that for another one of his colleagues. But, he came through and realized that living in fear wasn't the solution. And he was happy that Deeks came through too, with his decision to become an agent. He was really great addition to the team. Able and effective.

"Gentlemen, I have great news. I was just told that your application Mr. Deeks has been granted. You can start your training the next week."

"Thanks Hetty." Said Deeks, smiling.

"So, what's the story behind all of this Deeks?" asked Sam.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean why did you quit the LAPD?"

"I guess I've had enough. And Hetty helped me a little with my choice. She talked to me and made me realize that sometimes in order to move on you have to let go. And I did just that. Bates is still mad at me, though."

"Well, I would be mad too, if you sent me your resignation letter via e-mail Deeks." Callen said. "But, he'll come around, don't worry."

Deeks nodded in agreement and continued to go through paperwork.

"Hey, where is Kensi, anyway?" asked Callen.

"I don't know. She's been secretive a lot lately. She said that she had something to do downtown this morning. Dragged Hope with her, too."

"Yeah, the girl managed to befriend Kensi for a short amount of time. Kensi usually takes time with new people" said Sam.

"Tell me about it." Said Deeks remembering his first days with the NCIS.

Sam and Callen exchanged looks about what Sam just said. Sam noticed the look that crossed Deeks' face.

"Sorry Deeks, didn't mean to say it that way."

"It's okay Sam. Really"

"Okay, if you say so…"

…

* * *

**-At the other end of town-**

"So, do you have the results from my blood tests doctor?"

"Yes, Ms. Blye."

"And?"

"And everything is just fine. But there is one thing that came up."

"What?"

"You…"

…


	23. Unexpected Turn

**Chapter 23 – Unexpected turn**

* * *

**The lyrics belong to their respective owners. I don't own anything. **

**Special thanks to Jericho Steele that helped me with some of the info in this chapter (you've been very helpful throughout the whole story). **

**And we are slowly coming to the end. Few more chapters.**

* * *

Every new agent that joined the Naval Criminal Investigative Service otherwise known as NCIS, had to go through the Special Agent Basic Training Program (SABTP). Graduates from this program worked under the authority of the Secretary of the Navy.

Looking at the activities on his schedule for the next month or so ex-detective Marty Deeks thought that Henrietta Lange was way more scary than the SecNav.

He was supposed to leave for Brunswick, Georgia where the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center (FLETC) was located. After that training Marty Deeks was finally going to get official NCIS credentials and be entitled as Special Agent Marty Deeks. He knew one thing for sure. He would miss his girlfriend where he was going.

Scratch that – he was going to miss his fiancée. Last night was the night when all of them went to party in town and that was actually the first time they got out together since that dinner few months ago. In the middle of the night as they were dancing Deeks asked Kensi to be his wife and she said "yes". Marty Deeks was the happiest man on Earth right then. He still was as he packed his go bag.

But, he won't be long gone. Only a month or so. It depended on the courses, but he passed most of the Law Enforcement courses while with the LAPD, so there was no need for him to do them again. And Hetty made sure that his stay at the Glynco base in Georgia would be of a minimum. As a part of a federal agency for 5 years now Deeks knew most of the military language, secrets and knew how to handle himself in military action.

The FLETC training center 'Glynco" was located exactly on the middle between Savannah, Georgia and Jacksonville, Florida. The Glynco center was a town into a town itself and it had its own postal code. It was located on the northwestern edge of Brunswick, Georgia (known as Glynco, Georgia).

Glynco was the headquarters facility for the FLETC. It was situated on 1600 acres in southeast Georgia with modern conventional facilities (classrooms, dormitories, and administrative and logistical support structures, including a dining hall capable of serving more than 4000 meals per day). Glynco had 18 firearms ranges, including a state-of-the-art indoor range complex with 46 separate firing points. Also it had eight highly versatile semi-enclosed ranges with 200 additional firing points.

A nice place, Deeks thought.

Other training assets of the FLETC campus in Glynco, GA included a sprawling complex of driver training ranges; a physical techniques facility; explosives range; fully functional mock port of entry and numerous structures which supported the training effort.

Among these "structures" was a 34 building "neighborhood" practical exercise arena which includes houses equipped with video cameras for recording various kinds of practical exercises.

Classroom. That word made Deeks to think of high school. In a way this training was something like going back to school. The classroom buildings of the FLETC housed various special purpose areas, including a library; interviewing suites; mock court rooms (Courtrooms? Really?!); computer forensics laboratories and other laboratories for fingerprinting and identifying narcotics.

Glynco's physical techniques complex encompassed over three acres, including mat rooms, classrooms, weight rooms, gymnasium and other facilities devoted to physical training and fitness.

Like Deeks thought, a nice place.

The quick recap on the training campus left him speechless.

It was time for him to go. All of his colleagues and friends came to the base at Camp Pendleton to wish him a safe trip to Georgia. It wasn't a long time since they all went there and they all knew what exactly happened there. But, there was a determination in Deeks that convinced them that he won't have any trouble regarding his training. Plus, it was a different place from the one they went to last time. The hardest part was when Deeks was supposed to say goodbye to Kensi, with a promise that they will see each other soon.

Now, as he was flying to his destination, he reviewed which classes he should take.

*AFTCSI I and II (Advanced Forensic Techniques in Crime Scene)

*AILEITP (Advanced Interviewing for Law Enforcement Investigators Training Program)

*AIM (Advanced Instructions for Marksmanship)

*ASTTP (Active Shooter Threat Training Program)

*AXP_BTTTP (Backcountry Tactics and Tracking Training Program)

*BIRDE (Basic Incident Response to Digital Evidence)

*BTMTP (Basic Tactical Medical Training Program)

*CESP (Covert Electronic Surveillance Program)

*LTATP (Land Transportation Anti-terrorism Training Program)

*MTOTP (Maritime Tactical Operations Training Program)

*PDR (Protective Detail Refresher)

…

* * *

Kensi recalled everything that happened this past week as she drove the Cadillac back to town. A week ago she made a choice that no one knew about. Well, no one except maybe Hetty, but even if she knew, she never said a thing to her.

A week ago, Kensi got the blood test results. With shocking news and the sweetest "illness" that she could get.

…

* * *

**(Flashback)**

"So, do you have the results from my blood analysis doctor?"

"Yes, Ms. Blye."

'And?"

"And everything is just fine. But there's one more thing that came up."

"What?"

"You are pregnant."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"You are pregnant. I did the tests twice to be sure. No doubt, you are pregnant. Congratulations."

Kensi looked at the doctor completely shocked. Pregnant? She was expecting a baby. From Deeks. It can't be.

"For how long?"

"Two or three weeks, the tests were inconclusive."

It was no secret that Kensi Blye hated kids. Well, not that she hated them, but she hated the thought of having them. Plus, in their line of work it wasn't the best thing to bring a child into the world, but one never knows what's going to happen. She thought of the possibilities. She could keep the child, marry Deeks and live happily ever after. Or she could abort the child, tell Deeks nothing, marry him later, and live happily ever after. Every choice brought repercussions.

Kensi was on a crossroad.

…

* * *

After thorough thinking, Kensi chose to keep the baby. She was so deep in her thoughts that she didn't hear the doctor calling her name, repeatedly.

"Ms. Blye?"

"Mhm?"

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine. Perfectly fine. Thank you doctor. Sorry, I have to go to work now. Bye."

"Bye."

**(End of flashback)**

…

* * *

Everybody noticed the change in Kensi. She was often moody, ate more than normal (well you didn't know the meaning of "normal eating" with Kensi) and spent a lot of her time while at work, in the ladies room.

Sam and Callen joked around that she was grieving about Deeks' departure before he even left. Kensi said that it was a stomach virus and that it will pass soon (very soon, some 9 months later).

Deeks was acting strange too. Hetty knew that face of Deeks' and she knew that Deeks had something planned, but she didn't know what exactly. What she knew for certain was that they were going to have a party Saturday night. Sunday was the day Deeks was supposed to leave for Georgia.

…

**-Saturday, 18****th**** of April-**

Kensi spent the whole day thinking about what she was going to wear that night. It was their goodbye party for Deeks. She still hadn't told him about the baby. She figured out that it was best for her to tell him after he came back from training. The last thing Kensi needed was a worried Marty Deeks calling her thousand times a day, checking on her.

Kensi realized that she was already thinking of what would the baby be like. Would it be a girl or a boy? Blonde or brunette? Blue eyes or brown eyes? Maybe mismatched as hers. She laughed inwardly when she thought of all the times Deeks "offered" his help to make her little ninja assassins. It was the silly part of himself that said that, but now the echo of those said words was like a sweet perfect symphony in her ears.

She was afraid that Deeks would notice the change of behavior and her constant morning nausea, but it was like Deeks was in his own world. She thought that Deeks was acting strange because of his soon departure for Georgia. Kensi had no idea how wrong she was about that.

…

* * *

Marty Deeks was having the time of his life, literally said with the title of the famous song. Ever since he resigned from the post "detective" at the LAPD he felt kinda different. There were so many things that he needed to do, and the time was limited. His talk with Nate on the beach helped him a lot to clear his mind. And one day he got the idea that will change the lives of all of them. He prepared a surprise for his girlfriend. Something that no one could think of.

…

* * *

Kensi chose a navy blue dress, knee length and black high heels with a black purse. She put on some make up and from the perfume that Deeks gave to her. She looked herself in the mirror. She looked different.

At that moment someone knocked on her door. She opened it and almost dropped her purse. In front of her stood Marty Deeks in a suit and tie with a bouquet of fresh flowers in his hands.

"A kid upfront gave them to me. He said they were meant for you."

"Was that kid maybe 36 year old blonde guy?"

Deeks smiled sheepishly.

"That's what I thought. Nice trick counselor." She said. "You know, the last time someone gave me flowers, he was the one that committed the crime. And I hate flowers."

"Come on Fern, don't hurt me. And it's never too late for you to start to like flowers for a change." Deeks said grinning. "But, if you like I can take this back."

He pulled out a fern from behind the bouquet. Kensi smiled at the small act of kindness and love from Deeks' side.

"A beautiful fern for my Fern. And let's go. We're late."

As they drove to the restaurant, Deeks was unusually quiet. For a moment Kensi thought that he went back to the dark side, but on second look Deeks was his normal self. When they arrived at the restaurant, all of their friends and coworkers were there: Hetty and Granger; Nell and Eric; Sam and Michelle; Callen and Joelle, Hope and Nate.

"I thought that you would cancel in the last minute."

"Why is that Sam?" asked Kensi.

"Well, you've been feeling sick the whole week. I thought… but, I'm glad you came."

Kensi smiled. Inside, her heart beat so fast.

Soon, all of them ordered something to eat and drink. All of them ordered wine, only Kensi ordered a juice.

"What Kens? Healthy food and stuff, huh? Alcohol free?" Callen teased.

Kensi sent him a death glare and Callen stopped.

"Your silent threat worked Kensi. I wonder why mine won't work." Said Joelle.

Kensi chuckled.

"Maybe you two should work on 'silent threats' course." Said Hope. "In that case, I don't want to be Callen."

"Hey, stop it." Callen said.

"You asked for it." Said Sam.

"Now you are just mocking me big guy."

Looking from aside Hetty and Granger led a silent conversation between themselves.

"At this point Henrietta, one would think that they work in a federal agency."

"One would think, Owen. One would think."

Both of them watched the show as their elite team fought over tiny little things. Who would say that they have solved crimes such as terrorism and murders?

For the whole time they were in the diner love songs and great hits were playing in the background. Songs like "Time of my Life", "All for love", "Bed of Roses" etc. But, now there was one particular song that drew Deeks' attention. "Feels like tonight" by Daughtry.

"Would you like to dance Mademoiselle Blye?"

"Only if you don't step on me every single time."

Deeks chuckled. "No, I think that I learned how to dance. Powered by Henrietta Lange Inc." he whispered the last part.

"I've heard you Mr. Deeks." Said Hetty.

Kensi and Deeks danced on the sounds of the song. Kensi (and the others obviously) were surprised from Deeks singing the song.

"_**You, you got me thinking that it will be alright…**_

…_**you believed me in every single lie…**_

…_**And it feels like tonight…**_

…_**there's nothing that I wanna do, but tryin' to make it up to you…**_

…_**I was chasing, but nothing was all I found**_

_**From the moment you came into my life **_

_**You, you showed me what's right…**_

…_**I never felt like this before**_

_**Just when I leave I'm back for more**_

_**Nothing else it seems to matter**_

_**In this ever changing days**_

_**You are the one thing that remains **_

_**I could sit like this foreveeeeer…"**_

By the time the song finished every couple in the restaurant was up and dancing. Most of them were older couples that needed a reminder of the love and affection that got them together in the first place.

Deeks looked at all of them and fantasized of what would his and Kensi's life be when they get old. Kids, grandkids, Monty Jr. Jr. Jr. He grinned like a fool. Kensi noticed that and looked him questioningly.

"Do you think that we will be that happy when we grow old Kens?" Deeks asked her.

"I wish." She replied.

Suddenly Deeks took out a small box out of his pocket and kneeled in front of Kensi.

"Will you marry me?"

"Yes." Kensi said.

The others were screaming (literally!) from happiness.

…

* * *

That afternoon, Sunday, April the 19th, Marty Deeks was replaying the events from last night. Once more he thanked God for everything he had in life. It was even more than he asked for.

Now, there was one more thing he needed to do before he was complete as a person again.

…


	24. Mother's Day

**Chapter 24 - Mother's Day**

* * *

Although Deeks was supposed to stay in Glynco for a little over a month, his instructor approved his earlier departure as a sign of bona fide. He liked the young man and he felt a strong connection with him. Besides, the kid worked five years with federal agents and he knew the drill already. He didn't need a reminder.

During his stay at the FLETC campus, Deeks was in constant communication with his friends and colleagues at the NCIS. He learned that Hope was to begin training later on. He was happy for her, and proud too. He learned that Eric asked Nell to be his girlfriend (for reals). But, most of all he enjoyed seeing his soon-to-be-wife. Kensi looked kinda different from when he left (more distant and more distracted), but he figured out that it was because of his absence (he had no idea it was because of her pregnancy).

While he wasn't training to become a federal agent, Deeks was thinking. He replayed the conversations he had with Nate prior to him leaving for Georgia, for a second time. Nate always knew what to say and always had advice at the ready for Deeks. Nate kept telling Deeks that he should open up to Kensi about his past and solve the issue with his mother. And because of that he sounded like a broken record going round and round.

But, there was one thing that Marty Deeks had to admit to himself. Nate was right. You can't move on with life if you still live in the past. And the fact was that Deeks lived in the past for too long. Always afraid to look back, always expecting his past to come back and claim property on him once more. The past, he so much tried to burry deep down in Reseda. That Sunday, May 10th, Deeks landed at Camp Pendleton with only one thought on his mind.

May 10th was the date on which this year's Mother's Day was celebrated. One of the Marines drove Deeks to town and left him at his apartment. He found a clean apartment. It was like someone frequented it from time to time. But, it was empty now. Before meeting Kensi, Deeks didn't mind the emptiness, but now it felt strange. Hope lived with him for these past months, but it wasn't the same. Plus, she lived with Kensi while he was gone. He missed Monty, though. But, he was sure wherever he was, he was happy. He said wherever, because Hetty took him in, and with her constantly changing houses, he wasn't sure where he was at the moment.

Deeks opened the fridge and took a bottle of water, opened the cap and drank half of it. He closed the bottle and left it on the kitchen counter. He left his duffel on the floor and took a quick shower. Grabbed the keys from the Malibu and headed out. Didn't tell anyone he was back, yet. He needed to finish few personal matters before he told the others about his return.  
He was going to see his mother first. Then he had something else on his mind.

…

* * *

That year as many years in a row Christine Deeks hoped to see her son Martin on her doorstep wishing her a "Happy Mother's Day". All the previous years were a dream, but this year her wish may have come true. Just like in the movies, she heard a car engine. A car stopped in front of her house. Rocky was in the basement, so she was completely alone in the house. She peeked through the window and saw the front of a red car. When she noticed the license plate, she almost dropped the mug full of hot coffee.

It was the car of her son.

…

* * *

Deeks got out of the car and had some doubts before he stepped in the yard and closed in on the door. He rang the doorbell.

Christine held her breath for a few seconds before she opened the door.

She was looking at her son. He was looking at her. Their eyes met. Then Marty did something that caught her totally off guard. He took the mug from her hand and left it on the kitchen counter. His eyes landed on the bullet holes that Gordon's shotgun made on that fateful Thanksgiving. There was a quick flashback. Christine saw the same that her son saw. For a moment she was afraid that he'd walk out the same way he came, but he did something that she wasn't expecting at all.

Again, like in the movies he walked slowly towards her and hugged her. It was a tight embrace full of love and regret. Tears filled her eyes and she was going to cry, but then she felt her son's trademark grin on her shoulder. A second later she saw it, too. He was grinning and looking at her with those big ocean blues that he inherited from her.

"Can we talk?"

Christine wasn't surprised from the question. Actually she was willing to talk, everything so her son can forgive her.

"Yes."

"I know that I've been acting like a jackass with you, and with everyone else like a matter of fact. But lots of things happened to me, and they made me realize that I need to make peace with the past in order to move on."

"Anything you want Martin."

"First of all, I want you to know that I don't hold any grudge. At least, not anymore." Deeks took a deep breath and exhaled it slowly. "I don't know from where to begin mom… I just came here and it's not exactly like I had prepared a speech or something…" He chuckled nervously as he ran his hand through his hair. "While I was training in Georgia, I had a lot of time to think about everything. About what happened to me in this house while I was a kid, and what happened afterwards."

"I know I've been a bad mother to you Martin, but if there is anything that I could change, I'd change my decision to marry Gordon in the first place. If I didn't fall in love with him like a fool, nothing of this would've happened."

"That's one way to put it."

Christine quirked a brow.

"I mean, if you didn't fall in love with him, you wouldn't have married him. Then you wouldn't have had me, and who would've made girls crane their necks to see this piece of handsomeness?"

Christine laughed at that one, and tears came to her eyes again.

"No crying. Please. You cried enough for a lifetime."

"But, how do you…?"

"I listened at night when I couldn't sleep."

"When you couldn't sleep?"

"Actually when I was finishing something for school I couldn't during the day, because Gordon was busy doing something else with either you or me."

"You were always overachiever."

"Runs in our blood I guess." Deeks said, thinking about Hope.

"Hetty told me about your cousin. I'd like to meet my niece if that's not a problem."

"That's okay. I'm sure you'll like her."

Christine smiled thinking about the girl that was helping her son's team with their case.

"I sense there is something else you need to talk with me. The real reason why you came here. It doesn't have anything with Hope, nor Hetty, I suppose."

"No, not at all. This was entirely my decision. Actually, I was encouraged to do this by a friend, and I plan to listen to what he said. I need to put my past behind me, if I want to move forward. I'm going to marry Kensi, and frankly I'm tired of running away."

"You are going to marry that handsome brunette? I knew there was something the moment I saw her."

"You actually know who Kensi is?"

"I don't know her, I only saw her. But the way she looked at agent Hanna and the worry on her face and the utter surprise, I knew it. Let's just say that a woman that has fallen deep in love once knows what it's like."

Deeks smiled inwardly. "She is special. A very special person in my life. It's the first serious relationship I have with a woman, and she is the one that I like to marry and have kids with. I guess like you said, someone knows when they are in love. And I think she is the right one."

"She is all I never was." It was more of a statement than a question.

"It's tough for me to admit that you did your best for me, you gave me love although when I was a kid I thought differently. If I go back to those days I think that I would do things differently. I know, I was wrong to leave you alone and I regret that. I came back many times, but I wasn't brave enough to cross those few steps that lead to the front door. I know I was wrong to have abandoned the one person that took care of me, albeit with silence and by doing so also hurt me very much, because I felt like I wasn't loved or even wanted."

"I'm sorry to have told you some of the things I did. But, I had to. It was your life that was at stake."

"Gordon wouldn't have cared if you did everything opposite than what you did mom. He was only interested in his bottle full of booze and smacking us around until he tired."

"You know, I understand you perfectly. You were young, you were scared. You came home every day to that drunk, and spent your days healing from the beatings he gave you instead of having a normal childhood like every other kid. Don't know how it was for you the years after the shooting, but before that I know how you felt, and I understand perfectly why you left. And I don't blame you for that. All of us have different ways of healing from the pain we suffered. Yours was as natural as mine. You chose to leave, I chose to stay. I know that I was at fault for most of the things that happened to you, because of my attitude and words, but after the shooting happened I stayed here. In this painful reminder of a house and I never went to search for you. What kind of a mother does that?"

"The kind of mother that somehow knew her son was going to be alright on his own. I don't know if what I'll tell you next is going to make sense to you, but I always thought that someone was watching for me out there, and following my every step. Like they wanted to be sure I was well fed, taken care of, to have roof over my head, all that a kid needs to function normally. I worked a lot to make money so I can finish school. But, sometimes, there would be donations to the shelter I was in, and it was the right thing I needed, and sometimes I got payed with the right amount of money I needed to buy something, or to pay for a school trip, and I wonder who did that for me.

"As far as I know I'm your only child, and we don't have other relatives, other than my uncle and aunt that don't live in L.A. anymore, not that they'd take care of me, of course. And the once I found out about half a year ago. It seems to me like I was having a guardian angel that tracked my every step and knew exactly everything I needed and when I needed it, so they could've helped me achieve it."

"I had that feeling too." _And I have an idea who that guardian angel may be_, Christine thought, but didn't say it out loud.

Deeks closed his eyes, and when he opened them tears were glistening.

"Listen mom, the fact is that most of my memories with you are beautiful. I remember how you made the Christmas holidays look magical so I won't feel like an outcast. And it was the only time that Gordon wasn't around to beat us. But, I guess that with the years I suppressed those memories and let the bad ones overflow my mind. Can you forgive me mama?"

Now Christine's eyes filled with tears. Mama. His name for her when he was just a little toddler. Mama. It was like a music to her ears.

"Of course I forgive you Martin. And can you forgive me?"

"Already forgiven. Happy Mother's Day mama. I missed you."

Christine smiled and took her son by the hand. They sat on the couch like many years ago. And Marty leaned his head on his mother's shoulder just like he did when he was a kid. Everything was over and everything was about to begin anew.

They both went through a lot, and came a long way from where they were.

For hours they stayed like that, hugged, saying nothing. The things that they felt for each other couldn't be explained with words. And they figured both of them will have a plenty of time to talk later. That's how Rocky found them.

"Well, well, lookie what we've got here. Lassie come home. I'm so glad Marty. Your mother suffered for you all these years."

One look at Rocky and Christine knew. _Yep, I definitely know who your guardian angel was Marty_.

Deeks was surprised to see detective Rocky Ellison in his mother's house. Christine caught the expression on his face and spoke before Marty had a chance to ask the obvious question.

"Rocky and I married a little while after your father died. He stuck with me all those years after you shot your father and after Gordon left me, but I didn't have the courage to file for divorce. Rocky was a big support and a helping hand. Now, he is a retired Sergeant Detective whose wife is the woman he helped once all those decades ago."

Deeks nodded in understanding. He wasn't bothered with the fact his mother remarried. She deserved a better life than the one she had with Gordon.

"Thank you for everything Mr. Ellison. It means a lot to me that you took care of my mother well. And thanks for everything you've done for me too."

"It's no big deal. Our case it's not something you can find on everyday basis, but I fell in love with her, and I decided that I'd take care of her."

"Come one Detective, Sergeant Detective or whatever you are. I was a detective myself remember? I detect. I know you were my guardian angel."

Rocky looked at Deeks with a surprise on his face.

"Don't look at me like you don't know what I'm talking about Sir."

"It's not that. I admit, I'm guilty as charged. But there's something else. You said 'I was'. What happened?"

"I left LAPD."

There was a long, dramatic pause.

"And from now on I am a Junior Field Agent for the Naval Criminal Investigative Service in Los Angeles."

"Congratulations Marty." Rocky said. "I always knew that you would get somewhere one day. And you deserve it."

"This is worth celebrating. I'm going to make something." Said Christine.

Deeks noticed the change in his mother. She was glowing from happiness. And he was responsible for that. That made him feel even better.

"Welcome back Marty." He heard Rocky saying.

"It's good to be back."

…

* * *

**-The following day-**

Deeks left his mother's house early in the morning with a promise that he'll come back later that day. There was one more thing left for him to do before he started a new page in the book of life.

He drove to Oakville where Marcos Ruiz enjoyed his stay in the "Presidential Suite". He checked in the visitors' log under his name, without adding "federal agent". This visit was personal and there was no need for the agency to know that.

Deeks noticed a change in the man, after he last saw Ruiz. He was fiercer, with a dangerous look in his black eyes. His body was tense, always ready to attack. For the time he was infiltrated into the arms dealing ring in 2006, Deeks didn't see Ruiz smile, never. But now, he was smiling. He had this expression that screamed 'Don't mess with me or else I'll get you back to your Maker'.

"Well, well if it ain't Detective Marty Deeks. Oh, wait you are Max Gentry. Thanks for the vacation, I love it."

Deeks smiled and didn't say a thing for a few minutes.

"Are you going to give me the silent treatment, Detective?"

"I'm a federal agent now Ruiz."

"Same shit."

"And I did what was necessary so we could get you all arrested. You were doing some wrong things Marcos, and you had to be stopped."

"Oh, and you were the chosen one to put an end to it, right?"

Deeks didn't reply.

"What do you want **Agent **Deeks?"

"I want to know why? Why did you help Tanevski or Leland, or whatever his name was at that moment? Why did you help the man that set you up all those years ago? And don't tell me it was because he was a good friend because people like him don't have any friends."

"Are you high or something? You set me up! You and your LAPD friends!"

"You see, you are wrong."

"No me digas. Vaya, esto es primero."

"Parece que es el primero y el ultimo Marcos. Y escuchame muy bien. Después vamos a hablar si prefieres la versión de Tanevski o la mía."

"Adelante, señor Deeks."

"In 2006, shortly before the large shipment with the weapons was supposed to arrive, Kristijan Tanevski, alias Michael Leland had a meeting with Lt. Mark Soriano, my supervisor at that time. I don't know how those two hooked up, but the point is that once Lt. Soriano had few drinks, you could never make him stop talking. In one of those nights, while with Tanevski, Soriano, drunk of course, happened to mention that he had an undercover operative within the arms dealing ring. Tanevski called in to the cops, few days after that meeting that the deal was supposed to happen on December 25th, instead on December the 27th. I asked Soriano to wait, but he refused and we shut down the operation. We were going to arrest you all the same Ruiz, but Tanevski made it possible for the arrest to happen earlier, so we weren't able to find out who he was, or to get a hold of him."

Ruiz looked at Deeks with awe and the calm posture of his face changed to an angry one in a flash.

"Hijo de puta! He told me that you ruined our business. That he discovered that you've been undercover. He suspected David and you and discovered that it was you, many years ago."

"Yeah, I know. He asked David to follow me. We found thousands of pictures from me and my team in his belongings after his death."

Ruiz realized how wrong he was and he wanted to kick Leland's ass for making him believe in his reasons to blame Deeks for the failure of the operation.

"I'm sorry it had to be like this Marcos."

"Don't be sorry det… agent Deeks. You did your job. I wish I lead a different life. It wasn't your fault."

"Well, that's a first."

"First and last, **Deeks**. First and last. Good luck."

"Thanks."

Deeks left the prison relieved and ready to face the upcoming challenges. His next destination was the Spanish Mission. It was about time for him to tell them that the training was over.

…

* * *

Sam, Callen, Kensi and Hope were working on their paperwork, while Nell and Eric did their magic in front of the screens. Hetty was watching one of those viral videos with the cats. Owen was in Washington D. C. No one saw Deeks entering the bullpen.

"Hello everybody!"

Everyone stopped with what they were doing. Kensi jumped from her chair and wrapped herself around Deeks. She waited for him to get back for weeks and now he was there, finally.

"I know I am talking in the name of all Mr. Deeks when I say that we missed you."

"I missed you too Hetty. All of you."

"Welcome back Mr. Deeks."

"Thanks."

…

* * *

Lt. Roger Bates was informed about Deeks' return to Los Angeles. It's been a while since they talked and frankly he didn't want to see him, yet, because of the way Deeks quit the force, but still Marty Deeks was one of the best people he had in the team for few years and it wasn't very easy for him to accept that "the kid" decided to move onto a new level in his career.

He grabbed the keys and drove to the Mission. There, Deeks was talking to his colleagues.

…

* * *

"Okay, okay, Kensi… please let go of me… oh!" Deeks gasped for air.

"What, Deeks?" Kensi looked worried.

"I'm sure you cracked few ribs."

"Sorry. But, I missed you so much."

"I never thought that I would see Ms. Badass Blye admitting her feelings to Surfer Boy." Said Sam.

"Don't hurt his feelings, Big Guy." Said Callen.

At that point Eric and Nell joined the rest of the team.

"Welcome back Deeks." They said in unison.

"Thank you."

Each of them hugged him.

"So, how is the feeling Deeks?" Eric asked.

"Well, I never actually dreamed of becoming a federal agent, but here I am today with that title. The feeling… I don't know. It's the same environment, and nothing has changed except my position within the team."

"Welcome to the team Special Agent Deeks." Said Callen with a big grin.

"I'm still worried about that hair though." Said Sam and smirked when he saw Deeks furrowing a brow and Kensi sending her well known death glare. "Kidding Deeks, just kidding. Besides, I like your hair. I understood a long time ago that it's part of you, of who you are. It's an honor to call you my friend and my brother. Welcome to the team once again, Shaggy."

Deeks chuckled at Sam's remark. "Thank you Sam." Said Deeks as he noticed Lt. Bates entering in the Mission.

"Oh-oh." Said Callen. "Deeks, if you want me to…"

"No, G, it's fine. I'll handle this."

Bates refused to talk to him after he sent that e-mail telling him his decision to quit. Deeks was surprised to see him there.

"Lieutenant what brings you here?"

"Congratulations kid. I know I was angry when you quit the LAPD, but I thought about that and I'm not mad anymore."

"Thank you Lieutenant. I know it wasn't the best thing to do, but I couldn't see another way of doing that at that moment, but sending my resignation via e-mail. You would've tried to change my mind if I came by the next day to do it in the old fashioned way."

"Yes, you have a point. But the thing is, I understand you. I know that you went through a lot, and you wanted to move on, that it was the best thing you could do. You are more NCIS than you ever were LAPD and know that your home is here. You truly belong here, I get that now. I have to admit that you were one of my best cops, although you never were treated as one. And you stayed loyal to the force, well until now. I'm glad that the things turned out like this for you. And remember Deeks, this team is like a family for you. Don't forget that."

"I won't Lieutenant. Thanks you."

"If you need anything, just call."

"I'll keep that in mind Lieutenant."

"I need to get back to work now Deeks. See you around."

"See you."

Lt. Bates waved at Deeks once more before he left the Mission.

"That went well." Said Sam.

"More than well." Said Kensi.

"Is it just me or Bates is getting a little softy? I never would've expected something like that from him." Said Callen.

"Oh, Mr. Callen you'd be surprised how much Roger has changed since Mr. Deeks resigned." Said Hetty. "Okay, enough talk you three, go back to work. The case won't get solved by itself." Hetty chastised.

"Don't you mean 'you four' Hetty?"

"You are right Mr. Deeks. Silly me, I forgot."

All of them listened to General Lange's order and they worked on the current case till sundown. That's when the same General dismissed them. She figured that a certain ex-detective and a certain female agent want some time together.

…

* * *

**-At Deeks' apartment-**

Kensi was drinking the last of her beer (she knew that alcohol wasn't good for the baby, but she couldn't say anything when Deeks gave her the beer without revealing the pregnancy, and she wasn't ready to tell him yet) when she noticed Deeks looking at her with longing eyes.

"What?"

"Have you ever wondered what it's like to have someone by your side that will read your thoughts and will finish your sentences for you?"

Kensi smiled at that.

"Yes, I got your point Deeks. You want to tell me that you love me and that you'll buy me a fish taco? Because I'm hungry, you know."

"Exactly. You deserve it for all that you've done for me. And you deserve more than just a fish taco."

"Shhh Deeks…"

She kissed him lightly on the cheek and got up. A burp escaped from her mouth, and suddenly Deeks jumped out of his seat on the couch.

"Sorry." She said, laughing hard.

"Hey there. I may reconsider my offer to feed the large bear you have in your stomach Kens."

She thought, _oh, you have no idea_.

Deeks tried to sound serious, but a smile appeared on his face.

"Touché."

"That's my line and you shtole it." Deeks said in Sven's accent. Combine that and the grin he had on his face and you'll get Kensi's hysterical smile.

"Told ya Sunshine, don't laugh like that again."

They drove to the taco stand in silence. In between Kensi ate 3 Twinkies.

"Sugar Crush."

"What?"

"I will call you Sugar Crush from now on."

"You play way too much Candy Crush Saga."

"Touché." He said as he handed her the fish taco. "Now, I got my line back."

They ate in silence with looks in their eyes that told all the unspoken words between them.

…


	25. Things change

**Chapter 25 – Things change**

* * *

**First, I would like to say sorry for the delay. It's been a year or so since I posted a new chapter from this story, and I'm aware that I'm few chapters away from finishing this story, but I was very busy (bear with me), and I have the chapters already written by hand, now I need to write them on computer and upload them. **

**I also want to give a heads up, because lately I've been reviewing my older chapters and changing some parts in there and I like to point out that the major change happened to the previous chapter since I reviewed it many times and I was missing something. So, I hope you'll read the edited version first, before you move on with this chapter.**

**Here it is the new chapter, hope you'll enjoy it and you are still reading this story. Thanks for the support so far, those who read it, and those who didn't, but will in the future.**

**And to the guest review on chapter 24 – I think this is your answer. And no need for big letters, I know that I have an unfinished story here, as a matter of fact - stories. If I wasn't gonna finish them, I would've deleted them by now.**

* * *

**-July 2015-**

Hope competed her training to become a federal agent in early July. She completed her training, the paperwork and thanks to Hetty she got an American citizenship.

Dear ol' Hetty having the right friends at the right places.

She was so happy to work with her cousin. For more than half a year she worked with federal agents and she was getting used to the job. She moved out from Deeks' apartment mainly because Kensi was going to move in after the wedding. And there was the need for her own private space. The preparations for the wedding were going as smooth as possible with two stubborn feds that couldn't settle their differences. That's why they had help.

Deeks introduced Kensi to his mother, but this time officially.

Kensi spent a lot of time with Mrs. Deeks planning the tiniest details for the wedding. They agreed that the wedding will be held on one of the beaches at the Malibu. They also agreed that it would be a private ceremony, just the two of them, the priest, and their friends and family. Then, the party will be held in Hetty's house. One of the seven she owned, anyway. The latter was Hetty's wedding present.

Kensi and Deeks' mom spent a large amount of time talking about Deeks. Kensi enjoyed the conversations that she had with Christine, her future mother-in-law.

Also Ms. Deeks and Ms. Feldman were introduced to each other. Julia got back from her vacation and after she and Christine met, it turned out they were more alike than they thought.

Deeks changed a lot after he came back from the training. He talked more openly with Kensi. Told her some of what happened in his past and in his childhood. Tried to better his communication skills, she once said he lacked. He tried to be better. And it worked because in the two months after he came back from training, they bonded more, like they should've done long time ago. Kensi hadn't told Deeks about her pregnancy yet. She was waiting the best moment for it.

The wedding was scheduled for July the 25th.

…

* * *

**-16th of July-**

Hetty closed the file she was reading and decided to call Christine to see what she was doing.

"Hey Hetty, it's been a while."

"Yes, it was Ms. Deeks. But, as you know, I never forget my family. How are you?"

"I'm fine. I'm actually going out with Julia and Kensi. She said something about Nell, Michelle, Joelle and Hope joining us. We are on our way to buy some more trinkets for the wedding and pick the dress."

"That's awesome Christine." Hetty using 'awesome'. Cool enough. "So, I'm left with the boys."

"I guess you are. I'd say more like stuck with them. I've heard that one of them is an ex-SEAL and the other ex-CIA that doesn't have a furniture in his house."

"I think that he bought a table and chairs. That's makes something of a dining room." Both women chuckled at that.

"I'd suggest you pick Marty's tuxedo. He said that you were the best in the field. Some of his outfits were tempting him to publish the pictures on social networks."

"He told you about that threat, right?"

"Yeah, he said that you told him and I quote 'I better not find that selfie on your Instagram'. Cool that you have Instagram, too."

"One has to move with technology Christine."

"Yes they do. My Rocky rocks with his smartphone. He knows how to download apps, he is reading the newspaper on it, and he's browsing the web… I still have trouble logging in to Facebook on my laptop. Go figure."

"I'm sure that Mr. Deeks will teach you the finesse of using Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and also sites like Fan Fiction, Wattpad, DeviantArt, Archive of our own, otherwise known as AO3, and such, where you can read fan fictions whatever that is."

"Okay, I'll take you up on that offer Hetty. One of these days. But, I gotta go now. See ya."

"Goodbye Christine."

Hetty turned off her phone and picked up Sam, Callen, Deeks and Eric.

"Hetty, where are we going?" asked Eric, a little insecure.

"You'll see Mr. Beale. Have faith."

"We're going at the firing range." Sam piped in.

"We are going where?" Eric's voice pitched at the end.

"Relax Eric, he is kidding you." Callen said.

"Really Hetty, where are we going?" Deeks asked.

"We are going to pick you something to wear for the wedding."

"We are- what?"

"Relax, Mr. Deeks. You will be the one picking the tuxedo. I'll be the judge of your looks. Or you were planning to go to your wedding dressed in a wetsuit?"

"Not that I'd mind that Hetty."

"Maybe he was planning to go naked to his wedding. I'm sure no one would've minded that."

"You know Sam, you always have the right words at the right time. I might just do that."

"Cheeky bastard Mr. Deeks. Now, ab marsch!"

Hetty led the way with her Jag, while the guys followed with the challenger and the Malibu.

"I don't know about you Eric, but I don't think I'll endure a ride in Hetty's Jag. I'm not the best of drivers, but she is kinda preparing to compete in Formel 1 or NASCAR with that style of hers."

"I think I share your opinion on this one Deeks. You are totally right."

The next three hours were spent in picking a tuxedo for the groom and the best men and friends of the groom. There were few ah's and oh's when Deeks tried the tuxedos he liked, but at the end Hetty landed the last word – tempered suggestion, more like an order. They even managed to put Eric in pants, even though he almost whined when they did that. It couldn't have been more official that that.

Little mother taking care of her children.

…

* * *

Christine met Julia and the girls at the shop where they were going to pick the dress for Kensi. Kensi complained that she had to be dragged in the lady-ish part of the plans for hers and Deeks' wedding, but she wouldn't just take one of the dresses in Hetty's wardrobe and wear it on her wedding day. So, she was stuck now, trying a model after model.

Finally, a dress was picked, that was most probably make Deeks' jaw drop to the ground.

"I think this is it! I'm finally dead. You girls convinced me to come all the way down here, and now you are gonna leave me go home, or else I will have to kill you."

"Nah-nah, Kay-Kay." Nell said. We spent four hours on your dress. You will drag your butt to our next destination so we can pick our own dresses."

Kensi growled which produced chuckles from Christine and Julia. Oh, they were definitely going to have some fun shopping with the young ones.

…

* * *

Henrietta Lange looked at the screen of her Microsoft laptop. Hetty rarely let anger rule with her, but this was one of those days when she wanted to kill someone. Kristijan Tanevski has just escaped from Oakville. She was afraid of what could that man do, now that he was free. She was kinda hoping he would try and she hated to be always right with her hunches.

Hetty knew that he met powerful people in the business of illegal arms dealing throughout the years. She suspected that few well known dealers aided Tanevski on his prison break. But, she needed more proof to nail them down.

She promised to herself that she won't stop until she finds them all.

She clicked on the file that was sent to her e-mail address just few minutes ago. The video that played on the screen was from a surveillance camera on the International Airport LAX. If you weren't looking for the specific person then you would've missed him for sure.

Tanevski was disguised. His salt-and-pepper hair was dyed in a dark shade of brown. He wore a cheap suit and a go bag across his shoulder. He climbed in one of the airplanes and disappeared. He was bold enough to fly under his real name with different information on his passport (those of Michael Leland). He was flagged as national security threat, but amazing what could money do in that department.

The next file Hetty opened was a file that contained the flight plan.

…

* * *

The plane landed in Istanbul, Turkey on the airport Mustafa Kemal Atatürk. From there, Tanevski took a plane to Skopje, Macedonia. Landing on the airport Alexander the Great (formerly known as Petrovec Airport), Tanevski took a cab to the bus station.

With a last minute change of heart, he climbed the stairs to the train station, on the third platform. It was the platform that was reserved for trains coming from and going to Bitola. He looked at his wrist watch that was navigated with the Macedonian time zone. It was almost 7 p.m. in the night. Soon, a train that goes straight to Bitola was about to depart.

Tanevski quickly went back to the entrance of the bus station. When he got to the place where he could buy a ticket, he bought one with his credit card under the name of Michael Leland, while for the train ticket he paid with cash. It was an effective way to distract the people that he knew were tracking him and his moves. The NCIS.

The bus led to Shtip, a town that was located in East Macedonia. From there it was very easy for him to just cross the Macedonian-Bulgarian border and he'd disappear forever.

But, his real destination was his home town. Although, he didn't go home as the man he left, he did go home more powerful than ever. He was ready to take over again. And this time he was going to be merciless.

…

* * *

Hetty closed the document. She also received a copy from the credit card receipt that said that Tanevski reserved a ticket to Shtip, Macedonia. She didn't buy the deception. It was just a way for Tanevski to mask his true destination. His home town. His safe haven. She knew that he would be home sick, everyone was at some point, especially people like Tanevski that were way out of their comfort zone when they were on foreign territory. The only place he could be himself was Bitola.

Hetty knew that Macedonia was an unknown ground for her. She couldn't go again Tanevski on his home ground, with a simple reason – she didn't know that terrain as well as she did hers in L.A. That didn't stop her before when she worked on field ops involving foreign countries. But, she sensed that her time was out, and she wasn't going to send her agents running blind on an unknown ground, not even sure that their target was there.

She took a deep breath, and contemplated her choices.

She dialed Hope's number and called her in the office. The recent addition to her team, Junior Field Agent by the name of Hope Brandel was Hetty's only chance of getting hold on Tanevski. She was the only capable person that could stop Tanevski.

There was another reason why Hope was fitting this mission the best. She spent her whole life in Bitola. It was her home town as well, and a familiar territory for her.

Hetty believed that Hope will be able to neutralize Tanevski and bring him back to the States. He was a dangerous man without a precedent. Plus Hope will have advantage since she was going to play the game on already known field for both her and Tanevski.

Hetty always knew that Ms. Brandel would come in handy in a situation like this, when she asked her to be an agent. But, this time, it would be both professional and personal for her. Hetty didn't know what Hope's reaction would be, since Tanevski killed her husband and her baby, but she had faith that Hope will manage to do what she was asked to. Asking it, will be the hard part of the job.

As Hetty sipped from her Scotch, she noticed hope had walked in the Mission and was nearing her office.

"Good evening Hetty."

"Good evening Ms. Brandel. Please sit down. Tea?"

"No, thank you. Oh, today it was a long day. I was with the girls and the moms shopping in downtown L.A., looking for a wedding dress for Kensi. My feet hurt."

"I know. I called you aunt shortly before she went out. Did you find your bridesmaid's dress?"

"Yep. Finally, after going in almost 20 stores."

"That sounds exhausting. On the other hand I was helping the boys to choose their outfits. All I can say is that Mr. Deeks will look fabulous on the wedding."

"I can imagine that. Everything looks good on him."

"I'm sure that Ms. Blye didn't know what to choose. You don't get married every day."

"I guess you don't."

"I'm sorry Ms. Brandel. I didn't mean to say it that way."

"Don't worry Hetty. It doesn't hurt very much now."

"But still, it is an open wound."

"It is." Hope sighed. "Why did you call me Hetty?"

"It's a little complicated."

"This can't be good."

"No. It's not good at all." Hetty made a dramatic pause. "Two days ago Kristijan Tanevski escaped from prison."

"What the hell? After all we went through to catch him and now he is gone? I can't believe this is happening!"

"He escaped from Oakville in Tuesday morning. Then he changed his looks and took the first available flight for Istanbul. From there he landed in Skopje."

"What are you trying to tell me Hetty?"

"I have a strong feeling that he is headed to Bitola. I have information that he bought a bus ticket for Shtip, but I highly doubt that he is headed that way. If I learned something while doing this job is that nothing is ever really as it seems and never rely on your first impression."

"And?"

"And, I think he's headed to Bitola, like I said."

"Why do I think you are not telling me everything Hetty?"

"It all started in Bitola. He is from Bitola. It's his safe playground. He knows the town very well and I don't think that he'll just buy a bus ticket for another town and actually go there. He did it with his credit card, which means that he knows we are tracking him somehow. He is deceiving us."

"You think he took a train so he can go back to Bitola."

"Yes."

"Of course, the bus station and the train station in Skopje are close."

"I want you to go back to Macedonia."

"I don't understand."

"I want you to go to Macedonia and bring Tanevski back on US soil."

Hope was silent for a few minutes.

"You will go by yourself. You will work with the police again, your previous post will wait for you when you arrive, but now you will lead a quiet and secret investigation. Tanevski won't be that relaxed in his town, if he knows that there is a person right there that follows his every step. You will have to make a choice about your small team of investigators, and the people have to be the best and also you need to trust them completely. We can't afford having someone who works for him to be on our side and sell information.

"You will have an experienced field agent as a contact. As soon as you have something on Tanevski, or if you are in trouble, you will call and say the distress word and we'll be there. I'll call the agent to set up a meeting so you can brief me on the progress of the investigation. NCIS won't stand down in this one, it will be a joint operation, but not that open, because this is the first time we actually collaborate with your country.

"I already called the Department of Justice and Ministry of Internal Affairs in your country and they agreed to collaborate. It's in their best interest we catch Tanevski before he does something and causes a beef in politics. I hear the situation isn't shiny, and we don't need to shake it any more than it already is with giving them reason to keep arguing over something like this.

"I cannot guarantee that he won't find out you are back there, but I think we have the upper hand in this."

Hetty was talking with Hope like she was sure that Hope was going to accept the assignment.

"You want me to go back there and make sure that Tanevski won't do anything and then you need me to bring him here?"

"Yes."

"Have you talked with the others?"

"No. You are the first person I called."

"But, Marty's wedding is-."

"Next week, I know Ms. Brandel. But, it is of an utmost importance for you to go to Macedonia as soon as possible. Of course, you'll attend your cousin's wedding first."

"Thank you Hetty."

"You are leaving right after the wedding."

"Hetty, if I accept this mission, I want you to promise me something. Don't tell anything to the others. Not yet. I don't want to ruin Deeks' wedding."

"I promise. Then, I may conclude that you already decided."

Hope nodded.

"And what's your answer?"

"Okay, I accept."

With those three words Hope accepted an uncertain future in Macedonia.

Everything was at stake.

…

* * *

**This chapter was halfway written when I realized that I wanted it to have few more scenes to make it more complete and to explain some things from the past 24 chapters, and some things I didn't mention so I guess that it turned out longer than I expected, so I divided it. I hope I got everything right, and hope you liked reading it. Not promising when the next one will be out, but there will be two or three more chapters, so it depends on how much time I will have to write them on the computer before I upload them, combined with my free time. **

**And, just to make it clear, I do intend to finish this story.**

…


	26. The Wedding

**Chapter 26 – The Wedding**

* * *

**Finally I have the time to upload a new chapter. These past week I didn't have a stable internet connection, and it was frustrating. Hope that you will like this chapter. It was a challenge when I first wrote it, and then I changed it few times, but still I'm not sure if it turned out okay. Tell me what you think.**

**The song and its lyrics belong to their owners respectively. **

**To the guest reviews:**

**French fan: Thank you very much, I wish you the same. Thanks for your review. It means a lot.**

**Caroline: Thank you very much. I haven't gotten such a nice review in a while and I'm happy to know that you like the story. Here's the new chapter. I'll try not to take too long, but my internet connection is awful these days, I don't know how long it will be till I post a new chapter.**

* * *

**-July the 24****th****-**

On the bachelor party were present Sam, Callen, and Eric, Granger, Nate, Deeks' friend Kip and few detective and agents that Deeks was in good terms with.

"I know that I said that I like this, but this makes me more nervous. I mean, the party is okay, and the people are okay, but I'm getting married tomorrow and it's freaking me out." Deeks ranted.

"Relax, Deeks. Nothing can go wrong from now on. Unless you or Kensi decide to chicken out at the last moment."

"Nuh-huh-huh-huh Sam, don't say that to him."

"I was going to say that they are too good of people to let each other down. You've come this far. No chickening out at the last moment."

"But, what about me being a good husband? And when the kids are going to come, it will be like Dante's nine circles of Hell and I don't want to back down then, when everything will happen."

"Like I said, relax. No one ever knows what awaits them in marriage. You think when I married Michelle that I knew how to be a good husband? Or a father to Aiden and Kamran when they were born? It will all come naturally Deeks, just let it roll."

Deeks took a deep breath and sipped from his drink. Alcohol free, because he wanted to be fresh and sharp in the morning. He couldn't risk to drink too much.

He noticed that Eric was distant the whole night, so he decided to cheer him up.

"Hey Eric."

"Hey Deeks."

"What's up surfer buddy? You are quiet all night."

"Well… It's nothing really. It's just… the anniversary of the deaths of my brother and father nears. He and my dad died when I was very young. I miss them very much. I wish they were here."

Suddenly a thought came to Deeks.

"Is by any chance your father's name Dieter?"

"Yeah. How do you know that?"

"I finally met you again. And we are working together for 6 years. What a coincidence."

"Now you lost me."

"Do you remember the summer you learned how to surf? A boy in the sand that was beaten by his dad and watched you surf."

"Yes, I remember. My father decided to teach him how to surf and we were actually very good friends."

"Well, that kid… It's me."

"No way. I can't believe that we actually found each other after all this time. I always wanted to find that kid, but never did. Not even with all of my skills. Man, L.A. is a small place."

"Yep. I guess it is. Never thought of it, actually. It's good to have you as a friend Eric."

"Same goes to you Deeks."

"Cheers to that."

…

* * *

On the other end of town Kensi had her bachelorette party. Christine, Julia, Nell, Joelle, Hope, Michelle and even Hetty were gathered in a night club together with Kensi's friends Kat, Mindy, Mandy, Tiffany and Tiffany. They all had a chance to get to know each other. A talk, a dance, and crazy women having the time of their life.

…

* * *

**-July the 25****th****-**

The preparations for the wedding were finished. Everything was in its place. Hetty's house was ready for the celebration. Both Kensi and Deeks were ready and in their wedding outfits.

Kensi wore a long white corset wedding dress that was a little wider at the waist, and pearl necklace and earrings. Her hair was already in a bun, accompanied by a tiara. Her make-up was done, too. The only thing missing were her shoes. She couldn't put on her shoes, because her feet were swollen. She tried everything, but nothing would work. At the end she put on a nice pair of flip-flops. She figured that no one will notice, because the dress was long.

The first signs of her pregnancy were showing. She was four months pregnant and she wondered how she even managed to hide it. Morning nausea, swollen feet and as from few days ago Kensi noticed a small bump. Not that big as for the others to notice, but it was a bump anyway.

Deeks wore a navy blue suit, white shirt, navy blue tie and black shoes. He spent the whole morning trying to comb his unruly hair, but the hair decided that today, she won't listen to his requests. Not that she listened in the past. Instead it stayed wild and styled by pillow as always.

Hetty made a lot of effort to bring someone special for the wedding. She called in a few favors. She knew she was irresistible and proved that to them many times over the years.

Few months ago Deeks called Ray to notify him on his decision to become a federal agent, that he asked Kensi to marry him, and that she said 'yes'. Ray was happy for his friend, but he was sad that he couldn't come to the wedding.

A certain little ninja overheard that conversation and decided to make it possible for Ray to come to the wedding. So, she invited him, and of course he accepted.

On Saturday afternoon, Ray, Jena and little Mackenzie were on the beach together with Sam, Callen, Eric, Nell, Granger, Nate and Hope. Michelle, Kamran, Aiden, and Joelle were present, too. Lt. Bates was able to come to the wedding. Also, there were Deeks' friend Kip and Kensi's friends Kat, Mindy, Mandy, Tiffany and Tiffany. Rocky stood next to Christine and Julia, feeling as proud as a father could be that sees his son marrying the woman he loves.

All of them made a nice little bunch of people that gathered that Saturday, July the 25th, to celebrate the sweetest moment in Deeks' and Kensi's life: their wedding.

Both Deeks and Kensi were ready to get married when Deeks spotted Ray. His eyes couldn't believe the sight in front of him.

"Kens, will you give me a minute?"

"You got it."

"Ray."

"Marty. Hey. Hi, Wikipedia."

"Hi, Ray. I'll leave you two together so you can talk."

Kensi disappeared in the bathroom.

"So, how are things going around here Marty?"

"Fairly well. For the first time in a while I have a feeling that everything is going to be okay from now on."

"You deserve it Marty. I knew that you two will marry one day, but you wouldn't believe me."

"Back at it again? If you continue with this I'll tell Hetty to remove you from the premises."

"That would be tough lover boy, because Hetty is the one who invited me here today. And considering she pulled a lot of strings to get me down here, I don't think she'll do something opposite of what she decided to do in the first place."

"That sounds like Hetty. Anyway, I'm glad you made it."

"I'm glad I did, too. So, I'll leave you and Wikipedia to finish what you started."

Deeks smiled and hugged Ray. Kensi came behind Deeks and wrapped her arms around him. He returned her hug and kissed her on the top of her head. He took her by the hand and together they walked to the platform where the priest waited for them.

As soon as they arrived the priest started the ceremony with his usual speech, but in that moment for both Deeks and Kensi those words were lost to the wind. Nothing around them mattered, but themselves.

"Today, we all gathered here on this beach, to celebrate the love and the marriage of Marty and Kensi…"

Kensi and Deeks have spoken their vows to each other.

"I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life."

"I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life."

"Home is where the heart is, and my heart is with you, my home is where you are. My promise to you is that I will love you for all of my life."

"With all my heart and soul, I am yours, sunshine and gunpowder, forever and always. And never forget that raccoons mate for life."

"Do you Martin Andrew Deeks accept Kensi Marie Blye to be your wife?"

"I do."

"And do you Kensi Marie Blye accept Martin Andrew Deeks to be your husband?"

"I do."

Kensi and Deeks exchanged their wedding bands.

"With God's will, I pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride."

The kiss was long and passionate.

…

* * *

They moved to the large yard of Hetty's house where the newlywed couple had its first dance on Bon Jovi's "Bed of Roses".

After that one (on Hetty's request), they danced on the waltz "An der schönen blauen Donau"* from Johann Strauss the Son. She didn't prepare them all those years ago for nothing.

The third dance was on the song "Love you with my eyes closed" that was performed by the German singer and actor Tom Beck. Deeks wanted that to be their special song, so he kept it a secret.

Few months ago when Hope first joined the team, he found out real quick that she listened a different type of music than the Americans there did. She listened to some bands and performers he didn't even know were performing in the US, let alone being formed there. The biggest surprise was Tom Beck**. He had sung most of his songs in English (with two of his music albums being in English), but his last and newest music album was in German (released just few months prior to their wedding).

Deeks didn't know German, but the songs had an interesting sound to them, so he quickly found himself dancing on their melody in the morning when Hope turned the volume on highest. He missed having her around in his apartment, but he understood her decision.

"Love you with my eyes closed" was track number five on Tom's second album "Americanized".

Kensi was lulled by the slow way the melody played in the background. She heard Deeks singing in her ear and once again she was amazed. She let herself dance to the rhythm.

_**I know how to listen when you've had a bad day**_

_**And I know when to smother you, and when you need your space**_

_**I know when be your friend and your lover, too.**_

_**Reading your mind is second nature to me**_

_**Treating you right comes so easily**_

_**There's not a whole lot about you babe that I don't know**_

_**I can love you with my eyes closed**_

_**Love you with my eyes closed.**_

_**I know all your deepest secrets nobody knows**_

_**Know that little thing to do that curls up all your toes**_

_**Here we are in the dark, and I know my way around, by heart, by now.**_

_**Reading your mind is second nature to me**_

_**Treating you right comes so easily**_

_**There's not a whole lot about you babe that I don't know**_

_**I can love you with my eyes closed.**_

_**So, lay back, relax, **_

_**Girl I've got your covered.**_

_**Reading your mind is second nature to me**_

_**Treating you right comes so easily**_

_**There's not a whole lot about you babe that I don't know**_

_**I can love you with my eyes closed**_

_**Love you with my eyes closed.**_

_**Love you with my eyes closed.**_

_**Love you with my eyes closed.**_

_**With my eyes closed.**_

_**With my eyes closed.**_

_**With my eyes closed.**_

"Where did you find this song?"

"You should ask Hope about that. She's the girl that has everything in her phone and i-Pad."

"Mhm. Remind me to talk to her later. She has a positive influence on you."

Deeks' grin got bigger and Kensi asked herself if his jaw hurt.

"I love you Deeks. Thank you for making me happy. Thank you for everything you've done for me."

"I love you, too, Kensi. Thank you for loving me. And making me the happiest man on Earth. I will always love you."

As if on cue, that song was played next. Everyone got up to dance.

After a while, they cut the wedding cake together. Kensi ate half of it, while Deeks stared at her with an amused look on his face. His wifey was definitely hungry like a bear today. Actually he asked himself, if he married a bear instead of Kensi.

…

* * *

All in all, they had a great time, laughing and dancing, until Kensi got one of her nausea episodes. She ran to the bathroom, where she threw up everything she ate that day. Hope ran after her to help her. She put a wet towel on Kensi's neck, while she dry heaved.

"Kensi, are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine."

Hope looked at her with a knowing look.

"Okay, I'm good. You don't have to be like Deeks just because you are his cousin."

"That's better. What's wrong with you anyway?"

"Nothing."

"If you say so…"

"What are you trying to say Hope?"

"How long have you been pregnant?"

Kensi almost choked. "What?!"

"Kensi, maybe I was pregnant for a short period of time, but I know the symptoms. You experience nausea, your stomach hurts from time to time. I noticed you put on flip-flops instead of your shoes, because your feet were swollen. You feel tired most of the time. And the most important symptom of all I think are the mood swings. Your mood changes faster than the lights on the traffic light. Not to mention that you eat twice as normal. So, how am I doing?" Hope smirked.

"You are doing great, actually. What's that in your family? Detectives." Kensi snorted. "You're all the same."

"See what I'm talking about?"

Hope got no answer.

"Does Marty know about it?"

"No."

"What are you waiting for?"

"I don't know. The right time, maybe?"

"You have to tell Marty. He needs to know."

"What's that?" Deeks asked, all of a sudden, scaring them both. "What's that I have to know?"

"Um… Deeks…" Kensi stammered.

"What Kens? Everything alright?"

"Yes, everything is alright. But, the thing is… I don't know how to say it."

"Okay, now is the moment when I leave you two love birds alone to discuss whatever you are going to discuss." Hope said and she left.

Deeks waited till Hope got out of the room, before he spoke again. "Will you tell me what is wrong Kensi? You seem somehow different to me today. And you just threw up. Is it because of the cake?"

"Nothing is wrong! Why everybody keeps asking me what's wrong with me?"

Deeks looked totally surprised with Kensi's reaction.

"I'm worried about you Kensi. You are important to me and I'm worried like hell for you."

"I'm pregnant! Here, I said it."

She said that so loud that everybody heard. The party was interrupted for a moment. It took them a while to contemplate what they just heard. After the initial shockwave passed, it was like nothing happened.

Deeks stood frozen in place, unable to move, stunned by what Kensi said few seconds ago. It was like someone punched him in the gut and threw a bucket full of ice at him.

"You are pregnant?"

"Yes?"

"I'm going to be a father?" Deeks said.

"Yes. And I'm going to be a mother." Kensi said.

"Best. Day. Ever." Deeks said, big dorky grin covering his face.

"You think?"

"And why not?" Deeks asked.

"Look Deeks… Marty, I will be a terrible mother. I couldn't stand the thought of kids before I found out that I was pregnant and I just don't know if I will be ready."

"Kensi, no one is born with the knowledge on how to raise kids. We learn as we live. I will help you. That's my baby, too, and I will do everything that it's in my power to take care of you and him or her. You are my responsibility now and I won't back down."

"But, what if I make a mistake and yell at it, or hit it, or just be a bad mother?"

"Believe me Kens, no one more than me has the doubts about being a parent. You know how my father was."

Kensi bit her lower lip when Deeks said that. She in fact knew what his father did to him. All of it. She knew about the broken arm, the scissors, and the beatings. She knew that many times Deeks was pissing blood, because of his father. She knew about the night Gordon wielded a shotgun at him and his mother. And she knew everything that happened to Deeks afterwards.

Her husband was a brave kid back in the day, and he was a brave man now. He faced dangerous people every day, he looked into Death's eyes every day. But, she never for a moment thought that he wondered if he was capable to raise children, or if he would be a good father to them once they arrived.

And here he was now voicing his worries out loud, which spoke volumes for the man she chose to be her soul mate.

"I don't know what I am going to do when the baby comes, but I am determined to try and be a good mother."

"I will help you with everything Sugar Crush. Besides, my mother is here, your mother is here. We'll do just fine. Nikoj ne se rodil uchen, like Hope would say. Something on Macedonian that I don't know what it means actually."

Kensi snorted, because she knew what that meant, because Hope told her the same thing once. It meant that no one is born a scholar. And she was sure Deeks knew that, too, but pretended that he didn't.

"Promise?"

"Promise Kens."

They hugged and that's when Deeks whispered in Kensi's ear. "Little ninja assassin or assassins."

Kensi punched him on the bicep and she laughed when he "oofed".

"I have the craziest wife someone could ever have."

"And I have the craziest husband someone could ever have."

"We better go back to the party." Said Deeks.

"Yeah, we better do that. Before I do something that I want to, but I can't right now."

They spent the last of the evening dancing, laughing, telling stories of good old times. And of course making plans for the future. Everyone congratulated them on the happy news.

…

* * *

Hope observed the celebration from aside. She thought about what Hetty told her not so long ago. She was still under the impression of Hetty's words.

She was supposed to go back to her country, to her home town. Someone would say that it was great that she had a chance to see her family again. But, she was also going after the man that ruined her life and almost ruined the life of her cousin and those close to him, which wasn't home sickness at all. Nor the right reason for one to go home.

She was supposed to bring that bastard back to the USA, to the federal prison where he belonged. And, on top of it all, she had a strange feeling about this particular assignment. She had experience in the field, she saw a lots of bad things in her life, took part in life-threatening situations, but still, she never felt like this.

It wasn't right for her to think about this on her cousin's wedding, but she couldn't help her brain from working. She could almost see the wheels turning in her head.

She sighed.

She was scared. Like never before.

…

* * *

After all of the guests left, each for their own home. Deeks noticed Hope was standing next to one of the windows, looking at the beach and the ocean. She had that distant and longing look in her eyes.

"Hey, it's not like that tomorrow the ocean would be gone or something."

"What?"

"I said that the ocean will be there tomorrow, too."

"I know."

"Then why are you looking at it, as if you were seeing it for the last time?"

Hope sighed. She thought, _I am_.

"What Hopes? Did I say something wrong?"

"I have to go back to Macedonia."

"Well that's… That's good. I mean, you are going home and… Not that I don't want to have you around, but… When?"

"Next week."

"Why?"

"I'm afraid I can't say anything at this point."

"When will you be back?"

"I don't know."

"Is it serious?"

"Yes." _Very_, she thought, but didn't say it out loud.

"That's the reason why you seem distant these days." It wasn't a question.

Hope nodded.

"And you are sure that you can't tell me anything?"

"If I tell you, I'll have to kill you."

"Mhm, okay Captain Hetty, message received."

Hope laughed.

"I will miss you."

"I know. I'll miss you too. All of you. And it's not like I don't want to go home, it's my country and all, my parents are there, my life, my past, I was born there, everything of mine is there… but I wish it was under different circumstances."

She couldn't tell him. Not yet. Not now. Not when everything in his life made sense. Not when he was happy. Which was rare.

Deeks hugged Hope and they stood like that for a couple of minutes.

"Whatever your assignment is Hope, I am sure that you'll do just fine. I believe in you."

_If you only knew. _"Thank you Marty. It means a lot coming from you."

Both of them had tears in their eyes, but they were too proud to cry in front of the other. Plus, today was Deeks' day and it was supposed to be a day full of happiness, not sadness.

After that brief moment the cousins shared, Hope left the house.

…

* * *

"You gave me the best present ever Kens." Deeks said, while both of them lay in their bed, Kensi's hear rested on his shoulder, their bodies and limbs entangled in a tight and warm embrace.

"I love you Marty. She said. "I couldn't have found a better person than you to marry."

"I love you too Kensi." He said. "Me neither, Kens. Me neither."

"Till death do us part?" Kensi said.

"Till death do us part." Said Deeks.

…

* * *

The next day they left for their honeymoon. Hetty wanted to give them more space to unwind a little, but the cases were piling up while they were busy hunting Tanevski and clearing the chaos and evil he left behind; that few days was all that Hetty managed to get for them. _But those few days will be heaven_, she thought as she booked the tickets.

It was time for them to go back to their routine. Everything was back to normal. Or so it seemed.

…

* * *

***For those who don't know, it's the original title of "The Blue Danube" waltz. Also the reference is to 3x08.**

****Another favorite actor of mine that's also a singer. You can check him out, if you want.**

…


	27. This is not a goodbye

**Chapter 27 – This is not a goodbye**

* * *

**Hi again! Here it is the new chapter. Hope you like it. I changed it a little, since I first wrote it, so I hope I have written everything right.**

**Enjoy.**

**To my reviewers:**

**French fan: your words have been noted, but at this point, I can't think of anything that could go in-between that won't drag out the whole story the chapter holds. I know it seems rushed, but I needed to wrap that up, before I moved onto the next part that would be the finishing line. Hope you understand. I would like to thank you, because I appreciate whatever my readers have to say about my stories. Have a nice day. **

**Caroline: Thank you again for your beautiful and nice words. I got some really nice reviews on one of my other stories, but this one is by far the review that made me jump up and down the living room from happiness and satisfaction, because someone liked my style of writing. And you are not far from what I planned. I am thinking about a sequel, but I don't know when it will be out. They will definitely help her.**

**Also, I would like to dedicate this chapter to Miguel Ferrer and what an awesome job he did on the show. I didn't like Granger at first, but then he grew on me and I started understanding him and liking him more and more. I am so sad that we have to say goodbye to him and to the real-life actor that brought him to life. Rest in peace Miguel, and wherever you are, know that you will never be forgotten by the NCISLA familia. You will be greatly missed. I wish it didn't hurt so much, but it does and it hit me so unexpectedly, that I couldn't put myself together for a while. My thoughts and prayers go to his family and his friends.**

* * *

"What do you mean you are leaving Hope?" Kensi asked while she was writing a report on one of their cases.

"I have to go back to Macedonia. There's a problem that needs to be fixed."

"A problem? What kind of problem?"

"I don't have the liberty to discuss the details of the case Kensi. Don't ask me that. Hetty's orders."

"Is there any connection with Tanevski's prison break?"

Kensi looked at Hope's big brown eyes and got her answer before Hope confirmed what she said to be true.

"Yes." Hope whispered. _And I need to work on my face expressions_, she thought to herself.

"You need to work on your poker face, lady." Kensi said.

_She is reading minds now?_

"Does Marty know?"

"No. Marty only knows that I'm leaving and that there's something that needs to be solved, but no other details. Does he know that Tanevski escaped?"

"No, I don't think so."

"And it better stay that way."

"Sooner or later he'll find out."

"And then he'll go crazy when he finds the reason why Hetty sent me back there."

"I know. That was my point exactly. Why don't you just tell him? It will be the best for both of you."

"I can't Kensi. If I tell him, then I'm risking his life and his career. God knows what will happen between him and Hetty if he finds out. Plus, he will pack his bag, buy a plane ticket and he'll go with me."

"You are right." Kensi said. "He is like that. It is personal for him. And for you."

After a brief moment Kensi spoke again. "I was thinking… We should organize that ladies night we talked about the very first time we got out in that Italian restaurant."

"That's a great idea Kens. It will be fun for sure and we'll get a proper chance to celebrate your pregnancy and the fact that you are married to the most lovable guy on Earth."

Kensi chuckled at Hope's words.

"And I don't think you two got enough down time in Hawaii."

"Tell me about it. Deeks says there are some of the best surfing spots."

"Hawaii is known for that and for many things."

As if on cue, at that moment the three musketeers a.k.a. Sam, Callen and Deeks entered in the bullpen, Eric trotting behind.

"That game was awesome possum." Deeks said, breathless.

"Yeah, yeah, Deeks. But, that's because you won." Said Callen.

"Actually it was Eric that got the last ball in the basket." Said Sam.

"Thanks Sam. I'll be sure to remember this."

"What, G? I'm just saying that Deeks and Eric were in the winning team, but the winning ball was thrown by Eric."

"Whatever."

"My dear husband… baby… love of my life, you are in the team for five years already. You know Sam and Callen, one way or the other they'll get over it. Come on, let me kiss my champion."

Callen grunted. "Great. Just what I needed."

"G! What do you want? It's her husband. What did you expect? Kensi cheering for you? Or a hug maybe?"

"Support from my partner for starters."

"You are a difficult person sometimes G."

"Look who's talking. Tough guy!"

"Guys, cut it out, okay?!" Hope yelled.

"Finally someone with the balls to make these two stop complaining after every game of basketball they have with Mr. Deeks and Mr. Beale."

"Hetty!"

"Yes, Mr. Callen, Hetty. You need to stop this, because there are far more serious situations in life than a game of basketball that you lost. Where is the fun in that?"

"You are right Hetty. Sorry. Congrats guys."

Deeks and Eric nodded, smiling.

"I'm always right, Mr. Callen. Even when I'm wrong. Ms. Brandel, my office, please?"

And just like that, moment gone.

Hope followed Hetty to her office, five pairs of eyes following her.

"What's wrong Hetty?"

"I have a confirmation that Kristijan Tanevski is indeed in Bitola."

"So, your hunch was true."

"Yes."

"When do I leave?"

"Tomorrow."

"But…"

"I know what I said Ms. Brandel, I know. I expected for you to leave at the end of the week, but we cannot wait any longer. The time is of an essence here. We cannot lose another day to that monster."

"We were planning a ladies night…"

"This night would be perfect. And the forecast shows a clear sky, so it calls for a beautiful night at the beach."

"Okay."

Hope went back to the bullpen.

"What's wrong?" Deeks asked.

"I have to fly tomorrow."

"No."

"Yes."

"What's so important that they need you there so quickly? And all of a sudden. You work here now, and they agreed for your transfer. Why you?"

"Because I am the only one that knows this case better than anyone else there, Marty. There is a new lead that confirmed the information we got. They need me. After the case is closed. I'll be back, promise."

"And what case is that exactly?"

"You will be informed about that case when the time comes Marty. I told you, I can't reveal any more information than you already know."

"I won't give up. And I'm gonna find out sooner or later." Deeks said, not realizing that he already knew.

"I know you won't give up Marty. It's just… It's not the time." _Not the right time for you to find out, anyway_, she thought.

"I hope it's worth it."

"I hope so, too, myself."

Hetty observed her team from afar and asked herself if she made the right decision to send Hope back to Macedonia.

She sighed.

…

* * *

"It's so nice to have Hetty as boss, huh?" Michelle asked.

"Yes, it is." Said Kensi.

"Especially when she says that you can have the house, her house, all by yourself." Hope quipped. "And I mean, by yourself."

"And the fact that she left us a note telling us that the drinks are on her…" Joelle said.

"She is always helpful." Nell said. She was turning into a younger version of Hetty, herself.

"We were supposed to celebrate Kensi's pregnancy and her marriage and it looks like we ended up saying goodbye." Hope said. "To me."

"Don't be sad Hope. You'll be back soon."

"I'm not so sure Kensi."

"May I have a word with you Hope?" Michelle asked her.

"Sure."

They went to the kitchen.

When she was sure they were out of earshot, Michelle spoke. "Why is that you have to go back, anyway?"

"I don't know if I should tell you Michelle."

"I won't say a word. An agent to an agent. I know I'm from other agency, but I know how to keep my mouth shut."

"You have to promise me that you won't say a thing. Especially not to Marty."

"I promise."

"Tanevski escaped from prison. Hetty has information that he is in Bitola. She wants me to go and catch him. The main reason why I don't want Marty to know why am I going back is, because I don't want him to remember the bad things that happened to him. It took him a long time to recover and to finally go back to his old self, and I don't want him going back to that dark place.

"So, I'll go to Macedonia, I'll catch Tanevski, well I hope I can do that, and then I'll get back here. Only, after I do that, I will tell Marty why I had to go."

It sounded easier when she said it like that. But, Hope knew it won't be that easy once set a foot in Bitola. Lot of things to go wrong.

Michelle nodded in understanding. She could see why Hope didn't want Deeks to know.

"And please, under no circumstances should Sam and Callen know about this. Are we clear?"

"Yes, we are clear. I won't tell them either. Although I don't know how much time will pass before they suspect something and figure it out on their own."

Hope sighed. Michelle was right. They weren't in Hetty's elite team for nothing. They were smart. They could put two and two together. And they'd be pissed.

"Come on, let's join the others. Change of topics." Michelle whispered in Hope's ear.

"We brought some refreshments." Hope announced, cheerfully.

…

* * *

"How It is to be married Ms. Blye?" Michelle asked, with a huge grin on her face.

"Awesome, actually. Deeks, I mean Marty is so gentle. You know him, always the big kid, goofing around, but this time he is actually trying to be serious. He wants to make me feel comfortable. He is trying a lot around me and he is doing fine. I'm thinking that it's because of his childhood. He never really had a role model in life. Maybe he thinks he'll do something he'll regret."

"Shouldn't she be Mrs. Deeks by now Michelle?" Joelle asked, giggling.

"Yes, sorry Mrs. Deeks. And you are right. That poor man suffered enough in his life."

"Tell me about i. I still fear when he gets those nightmares."

"No one should suffer like he did. It wasn't human." Said Joelle.

"No, it wasn't. You should see him when he talks about that. It's like it never left his life."

"So, he finally opened up."

"Yes, Nell. And I think it was Nate who made him talk, because prior to his training he wouldn't say a word about his childhood. If you tried to talk to him about it, he ended up changing the subject and frankly I was afraid that I would push the wrong button and make him retreat completely."

"I'm glad that things for you and Marty and you are going well Kensi. Both of you deserve it."

"Thank you Michelle."

"You are welcome. I owe him my life, you know that. And I never had a chance to tell him that. He's a nice guy. Sam won't admit it, but he thinks of him as a younger brother."

"I'm sure he knows that."

"I hope so."

"Hope, what it's like in Macedonia now?"

"I don't know. Few years in a row we have rainy June and then July, August and sometimes even September and October are hot."

"And what were you working on while you lived there?" Nell asked.

"Well, like I said to Marty the first time I met him, the crimes that happen in my country, you guys can solve them in a matter of hours. But, Marty said something else. He said that I shouldn't underestimate our police force, and I decided that he was right and I would give them a chance. But, my chief was old school, and he used old school methods.

"I understand perfectly that those methods are useful, too, but in this world where the technology rules, and it's constantly changing everything about our lifestyles, you have to go with it, and the new methods. Going with the flow, understand what I mean?

"You cannot stay in the past and expect the cases to be solved like they were then and there. And that's why my boss hated me. We always argued, and butted heads, as a matter of fact."

"I thought Hetty said that he recommended your skills and your work."

"She said that to me, too, but I highly doubt it Kensi. I don't think that he changed his opinion about me overnight."

"It's not even 8 yet, and we are talking about sad things. We should do something to lighten up the mood." Said Joelle.

"Great idea, Jo. Any suggestion, girls?" Asked Kensi.

"Yes. What do you say about music?" Nell piped in. "I have some songs in my laptop that I downloaded for this purpose."

"You are one hard working bee, Nell. Music sounds good. Bring it on." Hope said.

…

* * *

"I have another suggestion." Michelle said, after a while. Nell's laptop was half through Iron Maiden's "The Trooper" when Michelle spoke.

"And that is…?" Hope asked with half closed eyes.

"S'mores."

"S'mores?" Hope asked.

"Yes, s'mores. I was craving them for a long time and I think that it would be perfect if we made them now. The sky is clear, and it would be nice if we sat on the beach for a while. You know, fire, s'mores…"

"Oh, I love s'mores." Hope squealed.

"Me, too. I kinda haven't thought of s'mores in years." Kensi said.

"You haven't thought of s'mores? In years?"

"Yes."

"No way. Sugar Crush Blye with the secret stash of Twinkies in the Caddy that eats Marty's sweets, too? Why do I find it hard to believe that?"

"Oh, come on Hope, you know me."

"Because I know you, I know that… Okay, I believe you. You convinced me. Don't bat your lashes at me like that."

"He-he-he, I knew it would work. And just so you know, I am telling the truth."

"Keep telling yourself that Special Agent Blye."

Michelle smiled at the two women and wondered how it would be without Hope being around. With everything she did, she proved that she is part of the big family they were. She belonged there with them.

Michelle sighed.

Nell went to the kitchen in search for the ingredients. Kensi went to light a campfire.

After a few minutes Nell appeared on the beach, loaded with ingredients for making s'mores. More like s'mores for an army.

"What are you doing Nell?" Joelle asked her as she got up to help her with the load she was carrying. "We are five women here. This looks like you are going to make s'mores for people ten times our number."

"I found these in the kitchen. With a note. It says that the excess amount of ingredients that will remain, we could use it another time. Hetty scares me sometimes."

"How did she know we were going to make s'mores?" Michelle asked, baffled.

Kensi smiled. "Hetty is a mind reader. You should've figured it out a long time ago."

All of them chuckled at Kensi's remark and started the process of s'mores making.

…

* * *

**-An hour later-**

"Okay, now I'm officially done." Kensi said, with a mouthful of s'mores.

"I thought you said that three s'mores ago." Michelle chuckled.

"I eat for two now, if you haven't noticed."

"I understand you perfectly. Went through that part two times already."

"You know, Marty would probably chastise you, because you eat a lot. I mean sweets." Hope said.

"Yes, you are right. He finds my stash of Twinkies every time. I ran out of hiding places in the Cadillac."

Hope laughed. "Maybe you need a new car. I should probably talk to Hetty to get you a new vehicle."

"That's a wonderful idea."

"Is it true that cops eat donuts for breakfast Kensi? I know it's a stupid question, but mine is more the-bacon-and-eggs-breakfast. Well, he is not actually a cop." Joelle smiled as she pictured Callen's morning face.

"You bet they do. Although, he is an agent now."

"Sorry, I forgot."

"No problem Jo. I think he won't change his habits so easily."

"Sam will teach him a lesson of routine and how important is not to have constant habits." Nell quipped.

"What's that?" Hope asked.

"Well, there was this one time when Marty got shot, because of me, the ones that did were hired by a Chechen terrorist who wanted to find out where his son was. NCIS worked on the case then, and I helped the woman and her son into protective custody, but they disappeared a short time after I relocated them. He thought I knew where they were, and the easiest way to drive me out was to take the weakest link of our team down, that being Deeks, and the rest of us out of range, so he can come after me.

"Luckily Deeks was there to help me, and I managed to take down the rest of them, and before the man died, he told me the reason why they went after me. Sam promised to Hetty and to Deeks that he will teach him how to change his routine. Deeks was a cop, and his training wasn't as good as ours, because they could easily follow him and to make himself an easy target. No more going to the same store every morning, taking a different way to work every day and other precaution measures. So, that's about it." Kensi finished.

"Wow, quite a story you have in there. Marty is really a piece of work. Wish I could hear a lot of stories about him."

"You will. We can text and occasionally talk over the phone if you like."

"Part of my job is to have contact only with Hetty when she requests it through her link there. I'm not sure I'm allowed to communicate with any of you."

"I can talk to Hetty about that." Nell said. "We need to talk from time to time. I can convince her to send a safe phone to you. We will not lose contact. And instead of waiting for contact with Hetty, if you are in an urgent situation, you can contact us all, at any time. I'll patch in Sam, Callen and Deeks, too. Together we can communicate."

"I don't think Hetty will allow that Nell. It can endanger the op."

"Then, we'll bypass Hetty. If the line is secure, so is the op. I know there are rules, but we can break them when it comes to the ones we love and care. I'm sure I can think of something together with Eric, of course. It's easy as a pie."

"Or donut."

Kensi started laughing hysterically.

"What's going on Kensi?" Nell asked baffled.

"I… OMG… I remembered something… Please, let me take a breath." Kensi took couple of deep breaths, before she continued talking. "There was a time when I was dating this guy and we broke up. I don't know if I mentioned this earlier, but when I wanted to get over them I ate a lot. And during the investigation of our then current case I was eating a donut and then Deeks took the donut from my hands, to be more exact, he stole it and right in front of me he ate it. Shamelessly."

Kensi started laughing again and the others, too, following her lead, joined in the laughing fit. It was really funny picturing Deeks doing that. Too funny.

"Thank you for everything ladies. It was a beautiful night."

"Pfff, you don't have to thank us Hope. I wish we were just having an ordinary ladies night, instead of a goodbye party." Kensi said. "But, it is as it is. Nothing we can do to change the present."

"Maybe if we fast forward to the moment when you come back to us?" Nell chimed in.

"I wish it was that easy."

"Yeah. But, don't be so sad." Michelle said. "It's not our last night together. And this is not a funeral. Lighten up."

"Michelle is right." Joelle joined in. "This is our ladies night, and we are partying. Am I clear? This is not a goodbye."

"Yes, captain Joelle." Hope said.

"That's better."

The party continued till the late night hours.

…

* * *

**-The next day-**

On Deeks' request Kensi went to pick up Hope and take her to LAX.

"You know that it wasn't necessary to drive me to the airport Kensi."

"I know, but I really needed to talk to you before we met the team and Marty was moping the whole morning, I had to promise him I'll drive you. He wouldn't take no for an answer. And he can be quite persuasive."

"So, I've heard. Been there, done that. Although, I don't know him for a long time. He seems to me like he does that a lot."

"Protecting others fiercely, or worrying about others constantly? Which one?"

"Both."

"I knew you'd say that."

"You said you wanted to talk to me about something."

"Yes, I did. I was wondering if you have talked to Marty since we got back from our honeymoon."

"Why, is something wrong?"

"No, it's just… He seems distant to me. He is here, he is trying to make me feel loved and he is great at it, but he is not entirely himself."

"I haven't really talked to him after you two got back from Hawaii. I asked him how your honeymoon was and he started talking about the beautiful beaches and surfing spots like enchanted. He told me you stayed at the Kahala Hotel and Resort in O'ahu and that he spent a lot of time on Waikiki beach."

"But, he said he spent, not we, right?"

"Right. And it seemed odd, so I prodded him more and that's when he changed the subject and I decided that I should let things go their natural way."

"He does that a lot. Changing the subject."

"I'm sure it's nothing Kensi. Maybe it's something that he has to deal with and it has something to do with being married. It's one thing being in a relationship, and it's entirely different when you tie the knot. If there's something serious, he'll tell you. I think he has already decided that he'd be more open in future when it comes to him and you, and your life together."

"You are right. We should head towards the airport, or else we'll be late."

With that being said, Kensi started the car.

…

* * *

**-At the airport-**

"It's time." Hetty said.

"I know." Said Hope. "This is the hardest part you know, saying goodbye."

"But, we'll see you again, soon." Said Sam.

"And…" Nell said as she closed in on Hope and gave her a present, while simultaneously took her by the hand. "This is a present from me and Eric, so you remember us while you are there."

"Thank you Nell, this is really so nice of you."

"No sweat Hope. You are our friend, and we will miss you." Eric said.

"I'll miss you too Eric."

Nell gave her a secretive look that told Hope what was in the small box she gave her.

"And I know I'll sound like Hotch from 'Criminal Minds' in that 9th episode from the first season when he said to his agent that they'll see him when he gets back, so see you when you get back Hope." Callen said.

"Didn't know you were watching CM, G."

"Lot of things you don't know about me Sam."

"Thank you Callen. Hope to see you soon. All of you." _If we get lucky_, she thought.

"Bring some ajvar on your way back." Said Deeks.

Hope looked at him quizzically.

"What? I researched Macedonia a little. It seems to me that it is a nice small country and has some delicious dishes."

"There's one more thing. Ajvar is made in autumn. September and October. If you want to try homemade ajvar, that's it."

All of them laughed at Deeks.

"Okay, enough. Next time you search for information."

"Sorry honey." Kensi said through laughter.

"You hadn't changed a bit Deeks. You are still the goofball that falls for our jokes." Said Callen.

"Yeah, you are right."

He suddenly left towards the exit.

"Now, what happened?" Sam asked.

"Really?" Kensi said, going after Deeks.

"I'll handle him." Hope said.

"He is my husband. I should handle him."

"Don't worry, you'll get him back."

…

* * *

"Hey! Hey, Marty, stop!" Hope grabbed Deeks by the hand. "What's wrong? And don't tell me it's because we laughed at you. I'm sorry about that, but I guess it was my way of making a joke, and saying goodbye without crying and all those stuff."

"No, it's not that you laughed at me Hopes. I'm used to it. Why I left like that is… everyone I know either goes away or is killed." The hurt behind his eyes was immense. "And there is something that I was told that's bugging me, but I won't worry you with that."

"I won't die. And I won't go away forever. I will be back. When, I don't know, but I'll be back. I promise you that."

"Don't make promises you can't keep Hope. Just try and get back here alive and well. I don't need anything more than that."

"Okay, if you say so, I won't make promises. Just so you know, I hate goodbyes."

"Yeah, me too."

They stood like that in front of the entrance, hugging and drawing strength from each other.

"And talk to Kensi, please. She is worried about you. She thinks it's her fault."

"It's not her fault. It's not even connected to her."

"Either way. You two talk."

"Okay."

"Now, let's get back to the team. And please smile for me."

Deeks smiled at Hope and they went back to where the team waited for them.

"Like I said Kens, you get him back. Here he is."

"Thank you Hope."

There was a short message on the speakers that was delivered by a female voice. The passengers for the flight for Istanbul, Turkey were asked to get on board.

"This is it, guys. This is my flight."

Each of them took turns hugging her, and wishing her luck.

Hope left the terminal of the international airport LAX and boarded on one of the planes.

Just before she climbed the stairs she turned one last time to wave her friends for the last time.

No one knew what Macedonia would bring her.

Including her.

As she sat in her seat, looking through the window, thinking of what she left behind, she dug in her pocket to find the small piece of paper Nell slipped in her hand while she was giving her the present.

She opened it and read the message that was neatly written on it.

"_Just as promised, your safe communication device that will take you to your second family."_

…


End file.
